Pregnancy??

Hi I have been lurking around for some time and could really do with some advice please.. So I have just found out I am 5 weeks ish pregnant am also have a 2 year old little girl.. My cancer boyfriend have officially been together for 8 months like properly, but seeing each other for well over a year.. So he is shocked about this news and doesnt seem as happy as I am, he seems to be looking at the bad things such as us already having a 2 year old( she isn't his but calls him dad which he loves) and the sleepless night and all the other baby stuff.. Is he scared and shocked and needs time or does he not want this, or does he need me to make the decision and be strong and the rock for him?? I need help for all you cancer experts please! Thanks G.

@wineaux

hi thanx for the welcome 🙂 yes a pickle aint it just haha!! i laugh now but i shoulnt really! no whwere not living together, but he is here and stays nearly every night but he has a daughter from a past relationship who he has 2 a week, so dont want to push to much on her.. as for the future we want to spend our lives together, marridge seems to be out of the question but i think he is scared(ill get thee lol), he has said he wants to have a baby with me but in 2-3 years... oh when i read this it doesnt sound the best but cancers are hard work. this one broke my heart over a year ago and we went our seperate ways, i had a small fling with someone, but mr cancer slowly started getting intouch, so off the fling went!! lol oh what we do for our cancer men.. and way long story short we argued, it was over for good, and he changed his number.. i posted a letter new years eve pouring my heart out saying he had only a few days to get in touch or that would be it.. and guess what he did.... he picked me up we talked, and said he had to go and sort his head and he would come over to mine later that night.. a known behold he did 😄 and we have been solid since!!

back to the pregnancy.. yes i think hes scared that he will retreat and go wierd again which he has addmitted tonight, he had tears in his eyes saying how scared his is to lose me and my(our little girl) and thinks a baby will be to much pressure.. but he doesnt want me to hate him and he is very intuitive and knows i am putting on a brave face. i am 21 but a very mature 21 year old, and he is 35.. but age is just a number when your in love you dont care.. i think at the begining it scared him but since we officially got together we have been so in love, we have had our odd spats but thats due to me having the odd to many glasses of wine, but hey yo we all need a blow out lol!! and my god i could do with a good one haha! even all of his friend say how much hes changed and who would have thought he would be a family man, which i have even seen since the first time round.. hes one of these good looking and knows it.. but bloody hell hes changed and doesnt even look or talk to other women 🙂 he muct be in love lol!

I dont think your issue has anything to do with your man being a Cancer and at this point you are going to get what you deserve, be it good or bad. It is 2011, there are no reasons or excuses for an unplanned pregnancy. I feel sorry for your boyfriend because I think he's trapped. A "mature 21" year old does not constantly have children out of wedlock. A "mature 21" year old would have learned her lesson the first time around. One thing I will write about your man being a Cancer; when he told you that he didnt want children for 2-3 years, you should have listened and protected yourself. I'm going to go out on a limb and assume you had this conversation prior to your unplanned pregnancy since people who are "madly" in love tend to discuss these sorts of things in advance. Good luck to that unborn baby who certainly didnt ask to be born into this situation so for the childs sake I hope all your dreams come true with this guy.

Posted by PiscesFebFish
I dont think your issue has anything to do with your man being a Cancer and at this point you are going to get what you deserve, be it good or bad. It is 2011, there are no reasons or excuses for an unplanned pregnancy. I feel sorry for your boyfriend because I think he's trapped. A "mature 21" year old does not constantly have children out of wedlock. A "mature 21" year old would have learned her lesson the first time around. One thing I will write about your man being a Cancer; when he told you that he didnt want children for 2-3 years, you should have listened and protected yourself. I'm going to go out on a limb and assume you had this conversation prior to your unplanned pregnancy since people who are "madly" in love tend to discuss these sorts of things in advance. Good luck to that unborn baby who certainly didnt ask to be born into this situation so for the childs sake I hope all your dreams come true with this guy.

^^^^^^Could not have said it better myself......so my question is will you abort it if he doesn't want it because I think if you have it, you and him eventually will not last, but that's just my opinion and we all know that opinions are like assholes, but you did ask......

Cancers hate when they are mislead but he will be a great father to the child as long as u let him emotionally get through this and not force his hand on what he is going to do.He didn't expect a child now he needs time to rethink a new strategy.He is probably worried about the financial implications of a child, like most Cancer men so give him space but still give him plenty of attention when he asks for it.