Your opinions please!!

this is for one and all,

what do you like and hate in a cancer,

Personally I being a cancer, I quiet a bit know my strengths and weaknesses,

Well I want all other signs to share their views,so that we(Cancers) can get to know your side of story!

Be open about your views,please

I am in a relationship with a cancer male for 8 yrs now and I know several other cancers. What I like about them:
- very caring
- very loyal
- very loving
- sympathetic and sensitive
- dependable
- honest
- fun to be with
- humourous
- no gossiping behind other person's backs

There are no particular personal attributes which I absolutely hate, but what I find hard to deal with sometimes is:
- moodiness
- clinginess
- sometimes it takes a looong time until a decision is made
- not very goal-oriented, more interested in the way how to reach it. But that is actually something I learned from my bf, as a mix of both manners can be best sometimes.

I can't think of more at the moment. If something else will cross my mind, I will add it.

When I was a little younger I always ended up with a cancer somehow and I think it was at first just the fact that they pursue and pursue what they think they can't have. Well they ended up pursuing me until I said fine let's do this. In my situation I would have to say that:
- I love their gentleness
- they can be very protective of the woman they love, which turns me on as long as it's not over the top.
- they usually care about pleasing you and romancing you, which is a nice change
- they always cuddle the best. 🙂
- All about family...that's key for me.

Now there are major things that I have to put out on the table because I know that the cancers I've dated had these faults and this is why I don't date them anymore:

- clinginess to the point of (where are you? what are you doing? when are you doing it?) like I don't have a father already.
- manipulation into to staying with them even if it means on my terms and not theirs and then getting upset with me when I do it the way I said I was going to do it in the first place. This is when they've realized they didn't get their way.
- not opening up enough because they're afraid I'll get mad (hello...why don't you tell me and see if I get mad...I'm generally pretty optimistic) haha
- so emotional to the point of scaring me...this goes for the one's who can't express themselves properly and don't get their way and then act like lunatics. (not for all cancers)

That's really all that I can think of. Don't change yourself for someone else's opinions though deep water. I know it's nice to hear about the pros and cons, but some women would love a man who is possessive and controlling. If you plan on holding a healthy relationship as a cancer however, just try and give it some space and time. Let the object of your affections breathe a little and she will probably come to you with open arms. I think it's when it gets to be where you're with someone 24/7 and telling them what to do that really suffocates me. This is only when it comes to Gemini's however. 🙂

The only thing I have had a problem with cancers over is that sometimes(maybe it is just the fact that these individuals were young:teen years)they can take sides and not view the other person may have a point in being angry at the friend,relative,or whatever.It's always the other persons fault basically.But being a scorpio I do eventually know how to shut them up(sometimes do other times I just drop it and talk to the person who made me mad in private) and get a silent treatment from them.

The like relationship is heaven in the fact that they usually know exactly what im thinking.Always great to talk to about anything,understands that sometimes people needs to just be left alone rather than being bothered to see whats wrong,or are quit for no reason doesn't mean that something happened and im upset.I don't have any particular worded ways to say it but I just like them as people in most cases,There's usually a great amount of understanding between us and doesn't get to the point that one or the other feels like thier being used or lied to.

Okay,in case I put a negative spin on this thread by my dislikes of cancers.Those cases were mostly work related when I was a manager at a store and thier loved ones had to be written up,suspended,or terminated.These indiviuals got angry at me and other crew members because of the course of action taken.Being angry about these situations was completely unreasonable,one sided and unjustified,that some other cancers I know see it the same way if they were put in the situation.

the kemo

LOL

Well my view on Cancers. Personally I have TOO MANY Cancer friends and acquaintenances(sp?). Too many to be needed actually. And all of them are girls. About 5 to be exact. And the thing I love about them the most is that they're really sweet and caring individuals. Even the guys that I worked with. They'll honestly (well, most of them would) do anything for a friend in need. And actually, when I think about it, the ppl that I talked to the most when I needed an answer or some understanding in my messed up life, it was them. I don't know if it was because they were the only people around at the time, but, well. They tend to be good listeners. One of my old best friends would listen tentatively to me all the time, and I sort of felt bad for dumping all of my garbage on her and forcing her to listen, but the thing about it was she truly deeply cared about me. And she'd always say, "It's okay. I'm fine, go ahead." They know how to look out for you and she never made me feel like I crossed any boundaries when I was with her. Like she was with stretched out open arms all the time. But that was then. We haven't talked in months. Long story.

My Cancer dislikes. Well, most of the Cancer guys I knew were always sensitive and emotional, and while that made for good friendships, relationship wise I totally despised it. I wanted just the opposite. Not a guy who treated me like , but I was attracted to someone who didn't possess such vulnerability. And then of course there's the clinginess and the possessiveness and the jealousy. As for girls, the same 5 which I mentioned at the top where the same gals that I grew up with. They could seem to never make up their minds about anything, always bouncing from one train of thought to the next. Trying to keep up with them was like being on a roller coaster ride lol. It annoyed me for a while. I wasn't so much as a wallflower but they were always flighty a bit too much, and falling in love too easily and too fast. They had dozens of boyfriends before I had my first one, and would cry, get upset or emotional the next day over losing one. But watching them fall actually helped me to learn from what they did, and growing up today when I'm now pursuing relationships, it implants an incerpt in my mind like "oh, I'm not gonna do this and wind up like so and so." I was totally an individualist, and I guess with so many Cancers in the group, they all meshed together. I wasn't an outcast, but separating myself from them based on our differences helped me to develop who I am as a person and as an indivual. But I still love all of those girls. Perfect and not.

That's all I basically have to say about Cancers from my experience.

Well Thank you all
But here What in General I got from all posts was that Cancers are clingy...
Could you all elaborate that point please!
What I feel is that they care a lot about the ones they are concerned and moreover they have that security problem
They tend to work hard in getting the persons attention and they make a relation for keeping it,they fear loosing because loosing a object of their affection is very painful to them.
So they just want to be sure,sure about your commitment.
I personally believe that they just want to ask you whether everything is fine,
Cause they are a bit unsure of themselves,and they want to do everything possible to maintain a relation....
This is what others call clinginess.

Deep Water:

I have been with my Cancer man for almost a year now, and I can share with you what I've learned about him and I guesss this could apply to Cancers in general:

He is very affectionate- he loves to hug and hold me- but there's an aspect to this that I don't like in that when I want to discuss something serious with him, he wants me to lie down with him while he holds me while talking about it! This has driven me insane many times with him and I tell him that when I need to discuss something serious with him- I don't want him to hold me- I want him/us to face each other directly and not beat around the bush about what needs to be said. He has told me that he just has to do that- so I have tried to let him do it a few times but other times I tell him that he will just have to not try to hold on to me do it face to face without the holding. The holding, snuggling overall I absolutely love.

He is a peacemaker and keeper and he wants everyone to get along- I recently had a bad weekend with his family- and it tore him to pieces- I could get into detail only if someone wants to know-but he was really hurt that I was hurt and at the same time he wanted things to go well with his family- particularly one family member of his. Just didn't go that way.

He is very committed to our love and I realize how much now as of late.

He is moody and can be selfish- which has also hurt me a few times

He does not like to be told what to do- especially since his personality is so dominant- which I love- he is definitely a challenge because there's a part of me that is also very independent but at the same time I love his take charge/dominant personality.

He loves to feel secure and it just tears me up when I feel that he isn't feeling secure because I know that's important to him and I love him so much.

He is a hard-worker and a good worker- he has a very labor-demanding job and it wears him out but at the same time he hates not doing a good job- he can be hard on himself if he feels he didn't do something as well as he should have. I definitely admire that about him.

He loves money, lol- in that he has to make sure he has it. I've read that it's associated with needing to feel secure. I believe that now.

He is modest about how he looks- and believe me my man is DAMN sexy, I tell him this all the time and I have to ask him, "now seriously all jokes aside, you know you look good don't you?", and he'll just say "nope" and start making jokes or something about it, lol. He is very modest about it and I really don't think he believes it.

Ok well that's all that I can share with you- pressed for time here but I hope that give you more info.

Take Care
OBPisces

I understand that part of why cancers do that.But some of my cancerian friends and in particular my younger sister can be too protective sometimes I know it's because they love me and don't want me to get hurt but im a big girl and can handle myself in problems.Thats my problem with my negative problems can't be solved and worked out if sides are taken and cuts out the other person that usually does have a reason to be angry.

As far as the clingyness factor sometimes people don't like it because thier independant.With my brothers girlfriend he had to lie to just so he could go to hang out with other guy friends because if he'd told her the truth she'd want to be there because she would get the wrong idea of what was going on or would accuse him of it and start fights over it when nothing happened.The lack of confidence within themselves make the people thier afraid of losing think that they lack trust and confidence in them.

Well, how to explain clingy?
I like to be left alone sometimes and I do not want to discuss everything. Some decisions can only be made by myself. I like him being attentive to what I say, it is just that I don`t need to be given advise in most cases. I think its that being protective attitude that drove me nuts sometimes. I like being wanted and cared for but I did not want to prove that I love him. I mean, being in a relationship with someone MEANS that I care for him and I love him and telling him so and acting like someone who loves should lead to trust. So there is no need to be clingy at all. I know how it feels like to fear rejection or getting dumped but there should be more positive thinking! Otherwise it is nothing else than being buried alive.
Anyway, this was an issue in our relationship, but we learned how to deal with it. I understand why he acts that way sometimes and he understands that he can trust me and me needing to be alone sometimes does not mean that I am planning to leave.

So all Shall I guess it right that giving enough space to breath the relation is just one way to avoid being clingy.??
Hard for Cancers to just figure it how to do that.
Just letting your loved one take their own decisions,but also telling them the right thing.
Letting them have their own time sometimes.
Well is that it.
Hard for me to exactly guess it right,but I suppose so,these are the things what I got from the posts.
Well this is for all Cancers to act upon to have a lasting relation.

Thanks all if anyone else has something to say welcome!!

Yes,thats exactly it breathing space and you've got it made and your welcome.

I forgot that they don't like being told what to do, they take criticism harshly, and they're hard workers who love money.
Yes, but I also forgot. They do LOVE hugs. Almost as much as Scorpios (my dad and a guy friend of mine love to hug people a lot.) I'm not so much as an affectionate person, so when my Cancer guy just comes up and hugs me, it takes me off by surprise a bit because I don't expect it, but I love it. Cancer's generally have the best hugs. I can just get lost in my guy's arms forever. I just have this feeling of warmth and security. And I guess you could say that they hug a lot because, not because they're being too clingy or overprotective, but to show that person how much they love them and can't let them go. So when that person does leave, they'll remember whose arms will hold them and care for them the most.

All depends on what you're looking for. My DH is a Cancer to the Nth degree The man is flat out gorgeous. Mmmmm Mmmm - he can't cling enough for my taste. Believe me, I dated enough macho headed bullies before I found him. Give me a sensitive man any day.

I think it all depends on your likes and dislikes!
Anyway you cant get best of both the worlds!

That?s it, Deep Water. And it also depends on the ability of both partners to understand each other. I love my cancer man, he is a wonderful person to be with and a truly committed partner, not to mention all the other attributes I had posted before. We have a lot to learn from and to give to each other as we are very different in some ways. I don't want to change him and he doesn't want to change me.
*I think it all depends on your likes and dislikes✨
I agree, no-one connects with everybody on this planet and what I love about him might be annoying for someone else (and vice versa).

*Anyway you cant get best of both the worlds✨
I agree here, too, but sometimes its worth the effort to have a look into an unknown world and what might seem to be a dislike could turn out to be really interesting and enriching. At least that is how I feel about being with him.
http://www.smiley-channel.de/grafiken/smiley/froehlich/smiley-channel.de_froehlich051.gif<BR>

Ooops, did not want to post these stars but an icon. That one did not show up but the URL instead. I have to find someone who can explain to me how to use a computer...

Found someone...