How can you make patience easier?

Okay...I've been off and on with my brother's friend who is a Capricorn and it's been this roller coaster ride. I know they are the most patient people in the world and they have so much self control, but how do you make being patient easier for those of us who are not patient to begin with? I've noticed that it's getting easier than it was because I'm not AS emotional or analytical anymore. Nothing will ever change the fact that I dissect things though. For instance...we hung out the entire day yesterday with my family and I didn't really see him checking me out, but he told me later that night that he was checking me out all day and waiting to touch me. haha. I guess what I want to know is how they have so much patience. Don't they ever worry that we'll find someone else while they just plot out this hidden agenda?

Gemgem~~

I hope you get the answer to this b/c I'm searching for the same one. D@## those Cappys and their patience. Maybe the really think that we are so into them that even if we do happen to find someone else that we will come running should they snap their fingers or maybe they really are so "unemotional" that they don't really care whether or not we loose our patience while they are "patiently" trying to figure out of we are the one...I don't know I'm just as confused as you are - lol!

I know...it's an endless battle. Our situation is murky because he lives with my brother. It was like last night...he kept getting flirty and sexual with me when my brother would leave the room and then when he came back he'd stop. It's like this little scandal we have behind my brother's back and it's funny, but aggrevating. When my brother went to bed we ended up going at it of course. I figure this...if I just gradually start doing little things in front of my brother then maybe he'll feel more comfortable with all of it. Who knows. I'm wondering if Oaf has any answers to this. He disappeared again. haha. They do have an amazing amount of self control and I don't know how they do it. He was having an especially hard time keeping his hands off of me last night though. haha. I don't know girls...craziness.

First off,stop with the maybe it's an ego thinking because no thats not the case.People who are patient KNOW very well theres the possibility of the person finding someone else.There lays your answer it weeds out the flighty and who really isn't looking for a real relationship.In the case of relationships and life there isn't going to be a I want this and I want it now,you aren't going to succeed in getting it now,thats reality.If that person did really want to be in the relationship the time frame that it happens wouldn't matter to the person.It's called growing and evolving together.

You're right tiamat. I've been very good about learning this little lesson of patience. It's interesting, but the minute I got out of my last relationship I recounted the reasonings as to why it didn't work out. Everything pointed to rushing everything. I prayed about it and then this guy showed up and I think it must be a sign that I need to take it slow from now on and not to worry about the future so much. I like that word you used though tiamat..."evolving." Because that's exactly what we are supposed to do is evolve and learn from eachother. And whatever happens is meant to happen, right? Just a little reassurance on the issue helps me a lot. Smiles to you. 🙂

I love what you said, Tiamat.

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If that person did really want to be in the relationship the time frame that it happens wouldn't matter to the person.
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I am learning the very thing. Things with me and my cap are going nowhere. I am finding it is difficult for me to let things flow ? but I am trying ? if it meant to happen it will. At this point, my cap is clearly in emotional rack, and need a plenty of time to be by himself. I am going to date around having fun and not going to worry about serious stuff myself for now.

Gemgem~ sounds like you are doing well, much better than how I am handling things with my cap. I hope everything will work out for you and your cap.

Awwww...peachcow it's so good to hear from you again. Yeah it's difficult to be patient when they're going through their motions and all we want is to hug them until their eyes pop out. haha. I am doing a little better with the balance of being patient and letting things fall into place gradually. This is a really good lesson for me...that's what I have to keep telling myself. And I do think that it's healthy for you to keep meeting people and going out. It'll keep you happy. I think all women need that stimulation. Just let him get over his issues on his own time and when he needs you just lend a little shoulder space for him. The more patient and understanding you are he'll probably come around more. Listen to me...hahahaha. I should just listen to myself sometimes. 🙂 Hugs.

Gemgem, a great advice. Your cappy is lucky to have you. I will try my best and see what happens. It'd all work out the way it should in the end. Meeting different guys keeps me occupied and not thinking of my cappy all the time😉 so it is kind of helping me to be more patient with the situation.

Thank you peach...that's sweet. Yeah he is DAMN lucky! haha. Yeah patience is key...this is an interview process remember for ALL of us and not just them. They just do things with more self control.

I haven't heard from my cappy since Monday night and my patience is wearing thin. I'm wanting to call him or e-mail him (even though I know he's not at work) to tell him I'm missing his e-mails everyday but I know I must be patient and not chase him. I actually have plans with friends this weekend for everynight [wipes sweat off forehead - hope I make it]! I haven't been out with my friends since November of last year b/c I'm such a homebody which us cancers usually are but my friends are just not taking no for an answer [wipes sweat again - thank God for friends😉] - lol! BUT.......having said that I don't think patience will be on my mind this weekend but rather some action....lol! I'm so ready for this and I'm actually feeling really bored, not very sexy and/or beautiful (am really needing this feeling back so a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do). Got the highlights kicking, new nails, pedicure (even though the b!t@h cut my heal while doing it), two sizes smaller than the last time I was out and I'm ready girls........anybody want to come! LOL-for some reason I'm in a silly mood today. I think I'll hop on over to the cancer board and see if my fellow crabs are feeling the same way I do! I guess the point is I'm tired of waiting for Mr. Cappy to decide if "I'm the one for him!" I think its time "I" decide that even though we have everything in common, loads of trust between us (which is a big issue for capps and cancers), and all the other things whether or not "he is the one for me!" Come on girl, give me some girl power here b/c I'll so chicken out...........lol!

I hope you have the time of your life!! Enjoy yourself girl! Let your hair down go crazy!! Thats great to hear that you lost a few sizes!!! Thats always exciting!!

Let loose besos. I'm feeling the same way. I feel kind of like...blah and I know I'm not because he told me the other night, "I'm sorry I keep touching you...you're just so hot." I mean come on...if that's the case then grow some balls and call!!!! hahah. I'm dying here. I'm going out too besos and actually one of the nights I will probably make a little visit before I go out again and say hi. I think that kills him when I come over for like five minutes to say hi and then go out. hahahhhaa

Gemgem, I wish mine would tell me "I'm sorry I keep touching you...you're just so hot" - girl I would be all over him then......its been tooooooooooooooo long - lol! Don't you just love those visits where you are all dressed up and stop by for five minutes or so. Just long enough for them to see how good you look and for you to leave a lingering smell of your perfume in the room after your gone. I use to do that to my ex and every time he would tell me "you look like sh!t, your actually going out dressed like that?" It use to mess w/my mind until I realized that everytime I did this and he would give me the same response it never failed that he would show up at the club I was at looking for me. He knew I looked cute but couldn't say it......d@mm men! 😉 Well, I hope you have a good time tonight and if your Cappy does show alot of interest when you stop by for your five minutes make him work hard for it girl - lol! 🙂

I'm hoping to run into my cappy tonight but who knows...

greeneyedgemini - it is great to have the weight off finally...

I just hope the weekened turns out good b/c everytime I get excited about going it then the plans usually get screwed up but I'm going to be positive! Have a happy 4th girls!

Besos

Thanks Besos...yeah I hope he does pay attention because I don't have a whole hell of a lot of patience. I mean I text him last night and he didn't text me back. Maybe he didn't get it. Who knows? It's stupid. We'll see.

Uugghh.....capps and their d@mm patience.....lol! I caved in and sent mine a e-mail even though he is on vacation. He has to work on Monday and that will be his first day back. I just said I'm bored, where are you, cracked a few jokes and happy 4th! I tried so hard to stay busy today so that I did cave and do that but oh well....its done already. At least he will know I was thinking of him today but I did make it kinda sarcastic by saying well, I've been talking to all my friends today and your the only one I hadn't talked to so maybe he will think "gee, I was the last one instead of the first one...!" One can only hope right - lol! Have a good time! Besos

hahahahaha...you sound like me...with the mind games. I do the same thing to cover my ass! LOL. Way to go girl! As long as it's harmless you know what I mean?

I have to laugh because this is so entertaining. Honestly, I never get to hear this part of the conversation, especially since (in a way) ya'll are talking about me. If nothing else, it helps to give me an understanding of what she is actually thinking when I do the stuff I do.

Patience....

I can be pretty slow to make decisions, especially when it comes to relationships. There are some girls that I can simply pounce on and get real physical with, but the minute we start talking committment, I have to step back and review. It's like, kissing and making out is fun and all, but at some point folks are gonna want to be serious with me and that's when the brakes get put on.

Once she or I start taking our thing serious, I treat her like I do a potential employee; I put her in interview mode. I do this anyway, sometimes early, sometimes later, but trust me, it will happen. I take time to look at everything. What does her bank statement look like? Does she read books? If so, what kind? Is she argumentative? Bossy? What do her toes look like? Is she a good mother? Can she be a good mother? Does she want kids? If so, how many? How does she discipline her kids? Does she respect the position of a man in her life? Is she willing to be submissive? Is she clean and tidy or dirty and unorganized (got to be organized). Is this current front merely for show or is this really how she is? Is she smart and witty? Can she handle being a President's/CEO/Executive's wife? Can I TRUST her around other opposite sex (now adays, the same sex?)? Does she speak well? Does she dress professionally? If not, can she? Does she have manners? Is she selfish or giving? Have I looked at her mother yet? What will she look like in 20 years? Is she dependable? Is she goal oriented? Fun to be with? Sexy? Does she enjoy a good conversation over a glass of wine or does she need to be out and about? Which reminds me, is she comfortable being a homebody? Is she a gold digger? Do I think she's worth the investment.

Even if you make it past the first couple of rounds, meaning we get more serious, which may include boyfriend/girlfriend status, I'm still checking you out. If you can make it to the alter, then I believe we'll make it through anything. She doesn't have to be perfect, but she's got to be perfect for me. I've never been married, but I can only guess that if she is able to withstand the questioning, observations, testing, retesting, and testing s'more, then we'll someday feel convinced that she can handle the kingdom we're building.

Does that help any?

E~~

I am really laughing out loud right now b/c I could swear you are describing yourself as if your the cappy I'm crazy about - lol! If you like someone how do you let her know? A "very" detailed answer would be really great and I'm sure I'm speaking for alot of us here. Thanks again. Besos

Besos,

I'm glad to know that I can be of service. Truth be told, I feel special and NEEDED here (sure signs of a Capricorn).

As far as how you know one of us likes you, I'd ask you to visit this post:

Capricorn Introduction

If that doesn't work:

http://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/messages.asp?id=260357<BR>
It's on the first page (just in case it actually expands past page one).

I welcome all questions. It's quite fun.