Libra Boyfriend help

Ok Im back to the forum I'm a Sagittarius female by the way.
So I??ve been dating this Libra man for 8 months and he is just as the zodiac describes Libras. He is charming, sweet, caring and indecisive.
Sometimes I have the best time of my life with him and I feel like I'm really in love with him but sometimes I feel like I don't even have a boyfriend.
However it wasn't like this in the beginning, when we first started seeing each other he would call me everyday at his work despite the fact that he told me that he hates talking on the phone and which is something I respect therefore I never call him because I know he doesn't like it. Anyways before he would text me every second just to see how I was doing or just to chat. However it wasn't until the last couple of months that whenever we are not together (we only see each other around 3 or 2 days per week and sometimes he stays over at my place) he doesn't talk to me, IM me, calls me or texts me and when he does is just to ask me if I want meet him, go to the movies or just to say goodnight.

Whenever we are together things are great, the problem is when we are not together, since I never know what he is up to or I don't know if he is doing fine or not. He does this almost every week and it goes like this: we see each other, he stays over (no sex) then he leaves and then for the next 1,2 or 3 days he doesn't show any signs of life (just to add to that: whenever he doesn't show any signs of life I don't just sit there and wait for him to come to me I text him once or twice and if he doesn't reply I don't do anything about it). He then reappears and always gives me the same excuses for not showing any signs of life like —Sorry I didn't talk to you but I was with my dad?? or —My phone was dead?? or —My brother took my cell phone charger?? and then he goes all cute again on me to ask me if I want to meet, we meet again everything is perfect and then the cycle repeats.

I know he does pot a lot and that most of his friends, his brother and dad do it so at first I was ok with him disappearing like that since he knows I don't like it when he smokes, so I thought that he just disappeared just because he went out with his buddies or dad to smoke or something and he didn't want to tell me.
However by doing this he is slowly making me feel like he doesn't trust me enough to tell me what he is doing on those days where he disappears and is driving me nuts because I d

We had a similar problem in the beginning of our relationship where the problem was all the way around, I didn't use to see him that often (probably like once per week) but we will be all over me, calling me and texting me and it sort of felt like I was dating my cell phone instead of him. It wasn't until I confronted him that he changed and started to make more effort to come and spend time with me and things did change and were going great until this started to happen.
Maybe I am being too selfish to think or to want a boyfriend that cares about me whenever we are not together I know he has a life too but I don't think it hurts showing more concern about your girlfriend, please tell me if I am being selfish though I don't mind criticism.
Every time I see my friends with their boyfriends and I see their boyfriend texting them and calling them all the time I feel kind of sad that my Libra doesn't do it. I have tried to think about all the possible reasons why he does this and maybe age does play a major factor since he is 18 and I am 20 even if I feel that he is mature for his age but I have come up with one solution.

Today I had enough of it so I told him that I wanted to talk to him about something and I asked him to meet me on Friday. I honestly don't have the time to be playing around with someone like that because it is mentally stressing to wait for him to text me or to go online only to end up disappointed at night with my cell phone and with no signs of how he is doing or not even a hello. I am planning to take him to a coffee place and talk to him about us. Maybe he is doing this because he wants to break up with me but he doesn't have the balls to do it so I am going to make his life easier by asking him whether or not he wants to continue our relationship and to tell him how I don't feel like our relationship is working and depending on his answers maybe we will break up, have a break or I am willing to work with him to make it work.

Please tell me what you think about my situation. Are Libra men like this?
Tell me if I am overreacting or if you see any other solution to my problem. Feel free to criticize me about anything and sorry if my story was too long and the punctuation wasn't clear but I am in a hurry to get to class.

The callin situation sounds all too familiar to me....my libra had a habit of callin me everyday and then givin the cold shoulder every once in a while always givin some lame excuse! so i confronted him about it(whever or not he wanted to continue seein me or not??) he assured me that he wants to give things a go and wants a future with me.But i fully agree its a mind f#% ??!

"Maybe I am being too selfish to think or to want a boyfriend that cares about me whenever we are not together I know he has a life too but I don't think it hurts showing more concern about your girlfriend, please tell me if I am being selfish though I don't mind criticism."

i agree its not selfish @ all like i said to my libra the simple things like a txt/phone call mean alot it doesn't have to be a 2hr call even a 2min call means im on ur mind.


I dont have much reason too believe my libra does this b/c hes messin around wiv ppl frm the things he shows me, but i still find it suspicious behaviour leading me too believe after reading ur post, that it must just b a libra thing?? i know they can be very indecisive so i personally would lay my cards on the table and just let ur feelings be known.
i know that after talking too my libra his since compromised.

i too would love too kno why libra men can behave like this??hummn??

Thanks for your replies its all starting to make sense now and I feel better and more confident than ever to talk to him. I know he has a couple of issues in his life but they were from last month and last month we were closer than ever. Last month he found out his mom had multiple sclerosis(he doesnt live with her though) and he is planning to quit his job because his boss is too strict on him. I completely understood when he told me that, I didn't mind at all that he almost didn't come to my birthday because that was the day his mom told him about her condition and I completely accepted him not talking to me in those periods however I felt his "not talking to me" was different than right now.
I understand that they are big problems that will cause him to be stressed and busy but other than that I don't know if there is a lot of problems around him because he doesn't talk to me about them or at least it doesnt seem like he has any right now. He always tells me that everything is alright and it isn't until I see that something is bothering him that he starts talking about his problems. I??ve been very understanding by not putting a lot of pressure on him and always supporting him, but maybe you guys are right and he no longer wants to be in a relationship with me. I just find it so hard that he doesn't even bother to see how I am doing or bother to know if anything is bothering me. I just wish I could feel his so called "love" more than when we are physically together.
Maybe age is starting to matter and he is not ready for the kind of relationship I am looking for.

Also I have a questions how did you guys confront your Libras? or how did they confront you? Cause I honestly don't know how to put the cards on the table without sounding too clingy or possessive. Because he is going to try to change the situation on me by asking me why and by telling me that he has been making a lot of effort to see me and blah blah. And the answer to his "why" is everything I wrote above but I cannot tell him every single thing and as much as I want our relationship to work somehow I feel like its going to be over soon so I am hoping that I am right and he wants off the relationship because he is very sensible and I dont want to hurt him with my words.

I??ve been through break ups but they completely different from this one so do you have any suggestions? I'm really having a hard time thinking of how to approach the topic when I meet him on Friday.

Thanks for the advice after breaking my head last night I know what I am going to tell him. Anyways I talked to him today on MSN and I am meeting him tonight to talk. While we were chatting he told me out of nowheere that the reason he has been acting like that is because he has a lot of problems but I told him we could talk about them tonight.
I??ll tell you guys how it went after I see him, thanks for your replies and support.

Ok So I meet him yesterday, at first we were supposed to meet at a coffee place but he text me saying that he was going to come out of work late so we ended up meeting at a bar. Anyways when he arrived there was something very different on his face when I saw him, he looked depressed, skinnier and tired. I just gave him a hug and a small kiss and I told him that we needed to talk about some stuffs. Our conversation at first was very casual he didn't want to give me a lot of details of why he looked like that, he just told me he had a lot of problems. We then continued chatting about his problems but he kept telling me that everything was alright and it wasn't until I told him "Don't you trust me?" that everything changed, he told me everything that was wrong and apologized so many times for being the way he was being, he told me that he was acting like that (cold and distant) because he always does that whenever he has a problem and he doesn't like it when I see him sad. He also told me that he knows its a bad habit but whenever he encounters a lot of problems the only way he faces them is by being alone and not talking to anyone, but he promised that he was going to tell me next time and he continued to apologize. Then for the rest of the night we just had a pitcher of Sangria and everything felt like before, he promised me that he was going to chance and I really hope that it is true.

To the original poster. That is EXACTLY, nail on the head my situation. Only difference. We've been together over 9 months. Ok, I have to re read these posts since I need to understand him. I've had many talks with mine and tells me that he's got too much on his plate. the way he is acting is making me want him more. you know, that I don't see him or hear from him much.

I am starting to think that it's a Libra thing , it would be nice if some Libra??s could add their opinions about this.
I know what you mean because that's exactly what happened to me the, less I heard from him the more I got mad and the more I wanted to see him and whenever I didn't talk to him I always felt very anxious.
What I did was act cold and mad for the period that he didnt talk to me (3 days) so whenever he talked to me I would just be very cold or casual and never told him that I loved him like I usually do, I did that because I wanted him to get the hint that I was mad at him and because at that time I was seriously thinking of breaking up with him.
Then I asked him to meet me and I told him that we had to "talk" I don't know whether he thought I was going to break up with him or not but I am assuming he did. Then when he arrived I confronted him straight up and he finally opened up and told me about his problems I offered him my support then we kissed, make up and went back to my place just to sleep.

So far everything is great and now what I do is I tell him everything, whenever I go out with my friends I tell him what I'm doing and blah blah. I found that it works because now he does the same, unlike before where we hide so many things from each other. I want to show him that I am not like him I want to set an example to him (sounds a bit weird but I think you know what I mean).
Sometimes I feel he takes the phrase "You get what you give" very seriously.

Well I don't know if this would be of any help but don't try to pressure him, its not that he can't handle it, it's that most Libras don't like the whole in your face thing. If you want his attention the best way to get it (for me that is.) is to send him a text saying" Hey we need to talk." that is it nothing more nothing less. Also if you want him to be more attentive you have to create a challenge. (Libras hate but secretly loves having a partner that's challenging), he probably has the idea that he has you make him think different. I don't know if this might help but it seems that a lot of Libras from October to now are hiding in their shells maybe he is doing the same. For me its more of reflecting on my life ask him if he feels like he is in a slow pace with his life or something.

Posted by silentdoll9
Sometimes I feel he takes the phrase "You get what you give" very seriously.

DING DING DING!!!!!!! YOU ARE THAT MUCH CLOSER TO FIGURING OUT YOUR LIBRA MAN!!!

In all seriousness tho, thatz how we(libra men)work. We're just programmed like that **shruggz shoulderz**
Shying away from my depths :p, It would take alot of energy from me to fully analyze this aspect right now

Posted by silentdoll9
it sort of felt like I was dating my cell phone instead of him.

LMAO.... :0) Too funny.