On Love

Really now. . . Do you think when you fall in love, you really are just falling in love with the feeling, rather than the person?

I don't think I could ever really be in love with a person. I'm in love with moments, feelings, concepts. . . People are here one day and gone the next. I'll carry the good times with me always, but I don't think I could ever be completely true to one person. I could make a person very happy, but thats only because I know the value of feeling the moment. That's what it's all about. It's just a random succession of moments, here one day, gone the next. I'll stay with somebody, but half my heart and half my mind will always be on something else. I envy those people who know they could happily settle down with somebody their whole lives and raise a family. . . I couldn't do that. I'm in love with the world. In my mind, nothing lasts forever, and every point in time is only a way station for the next. I never really could put myself in the mindset of realizing that I was in a permanent position anywhere. . . even in somebody's heart. . .

I call it eing in love with love have a mate who falls in love two three times a year never last long. fall in love go on the honeymoon find someone new. I guess I am to boring I want the long run.

It's not that I don't want the long run either. . . It's just that. . . I can't seem to do it.

When the true experience comes your way, your perception will change.

What do you mean by true experience, Law Goddess? Do you mean being truly in love with some random person? Because like I said, that's never going to happen. I'm just not capable of being love. I love lots of people, but not in this way. . . It's just the way my mind works, I can't be in love with a person.

No hon, not necessarily random, but maybe, who ever really knows.

ok, now it maybe difficult to phrase this in the way I mean it but I will give it a go...lol...maybe my point in regards to my comment will make itself clear through a narrative.

Many years ago when I was in college I remember sitting around with a few ppl. I was 18 yrs at the time and as sure of myself and my place in the world and absolute (or so I thought) with my opinions on life, etc. There was a girl in the same course who was 27 yrs old. She gave me one of my definitive moments in life. She told of how nothing in our phases of existance is permanent and nothing is ever fixed. How we see ourselves at that age, and how we view the world will change as we grow into adulthood. OUr perceptions, ideas, opinions will change as we grow, b/c it HAS to due to life experience. When we reach about 30 yrs, we become more rigid and set in our ways and it becomes harder to accept change (unless we are open to it-although she emphatically said no to that idea). I remember listening intently to her. I remember arguing emphatically that she was wrong on many levels and that as sure of myself at the age of 18 yrs, that I would be the same person when I am 30, 50 etc...

She calmy said, "you will see". And she sure as buttere she was right.

So the point is, and truly not being or trying to be condescending (although I can understand how it can be read so), your perceptions on everything WILL change from a small respect on some issues to a large respect on others.

And here comes the freakin cliche..lol..(Mills and Boon...blahhhh)..but there WILL be a person, who enters your life at one stage or another, whether it be random or predestined (and that can only be determined from an individuals belief system or whatever) that will sweep you off your feet. You will immediately reach for your rose coloured glasses and idolise the very ground this person walks upon. Then, as time goes by, you will exchange the rose coloured glasses for something more transparent and start to question the meaning of your relationship and if he has treated you badly you will piss him off and lose all faith in partners in general for a time. Then that inner need for butterflies once again arises and you will be open to other advances.

You say it won't happen, it can't happen, and even that if you aren't OPEn for it to happen, but IT WILL HAPPEN. You can argue the point with me to no resolve, but Morgan...(calmly), "you will see."

Lawgoddess, i like what u have said...
The way of our thinking change through different stages of our life, from real experiences we learned something to reform ourselves.

i'm back again... 🙂

LOL, yeah, lawgoddess, I have no doubt that I'll change my mind as my place in life changes.

life is like a big book. it's full of good, bad, crazy, sad and indifferent chapters. we must simply experience it and never be afraid to go fast. oh yeah, i got my eclipse up to 100 this afternoon in charlotte, north carolina.

lol...

It's more like: never be afraid to go fast, just make sure you don't crash.

Some people just don't know how to live and love, I call these people everyone but me.

don't worry ur heart will find t he person eventually.

morganofmind,


in order to let love in we have to allow it in. if you've been hurt, a barrier can be up, sometimes unconscientiously. if you feel love inside you attract all kinds of love. when my boys were babies my maternal instinct kicked in pretty hard, i had so much love in me for them, it radiated out my pores. nothing could disturb my calm. i attracted love from everyone because i was so loving. the bond i had with my sons was the strongest i had ever experienced and i believe that is what generated the love. i have also experienced the opposite, not liking myself, consequently not being loved. for long term relationships one must realize it will not always be exhilerating, stimulating, butterflies in the stomach. there is a natural flow and ebb. there are times when you love that person and cannot imagine your life without them and then there are other times when you wonder what you ever saw in them and if it will last. just when your ready to pack it in the ebb changes, maybe the ebb changes when you remember the good, and what can be, or has been, i don't really know. but i do know it goes up then down. if you can ride out the down the up will come. i think we are all in love with moments and feelings. if you don't feel you can settle down with one person then maybe you are not ment to at this time, things may change in the future or they may not. life is good, enjoy everything, the good, the bad, and the ugly.

lynda

LOL... Thanx Lynda, you are right. I do have a tendancy to not let myself love freely. I tend to be a closed and shy person for the most part. But I always manage to have some sort of dramatic affair going on, probably just to mask the fact that I'm way to affraid of letting myself honestly loving anybody. *sigh* Ahh well... Love is not something I really want to think about right now.

You know what's really annoying? When "I love you" just sort of slipps out in a normal conversation. I tend to do that, I don't mean to, but oops there it was. LOL... Can you handle the emotional rollercoaster? Why anyone puts up with me is honestly beyond me.

this is to strange.

ok so wait. . .

I need opinions here. . .

How do you know when you're really in love?

I think it is one of those things that another cannot tell us...we must experience it for ourselves knowing we will "just know". Also, I think each person has a different view of love so this would make it an individual experience and feeling.

Morgan, you will just know and you won't even have to ask anyone. 🙂

oh

. . .

interesting

I agree.

Would you say a kid could know love at 18? Because I'm almost 19, and I'm positive I love my girlfriend. And strongly.

Sure, why not? At this time in your life this is what you know. As you grow and experience more of life, you will change and so will your thoughts...so will the word LOVE...it is all about change, and this is good. Love comes in many forms and if we are fortunate enough Josh, we will experience the wide variety of these forms from the many people who enter our life.

Enjoy your discovery of LOVE.....😉

Sometimes I think love is just a necessity for surivival. So at times, I think, it's just the feeling of love we crave, we want that security to find that meaning. Einstein once said something along the lines of we find the meaning of life when we live for others. But this I question, more like we find the meaning by living through others but hey! Maybe I'm just being cynical? It would make sense if you found your meaning by the happiness of others but this is something I wouldn't associate with humans nowadays.

you can only love another as much as you love yourself...
& when you are really in love you do so because you love the others' faults & not their attributes, accepted their vulnerability & willing to share your own..