Virgo Moon + Leo Moon?

I need a bit of advice here 😢 I am a Leo moon in a relationship with a Virgo moon. We've been together almost a year now and I love our relationship. The only issue is that as a Leo moon I crave affection and intimacy in order to feel safe and cared about by my partner. She, as a Virgo moon, often feels so detached and unemotional. I've brought the issue up to her many times, asking if she wants to cuddle, letting her know I really would love to feel more affection from her, but it doesn't seem to help. I always leave feeling even more dejected and unworthy of affection. I'm at the point where I feel like cutting myself off from her and isolating myself just because it's so hard for me to be around her and feeling like I always have to beg for the smallest amount of affection. I love our relationship and I don't want us to break up but I'm really really struggling here. Is it just me? Am I too needy? What do I do? Please help a Leo Moon out. xoxo

You're right, Infinite8. But whenever I bring this up to her she claims that she already DOES give me affection, which is true, but it'll be like a few kisses and she'll put her arm around me for a minute before going off to do something else. Do I have a right to say that I feel like that isn't enough? I just want to be close to her, I want to spend quality time.

She brings up examples like that and says "see! I do give you affection!" and then when I try to say I would ideally love more closeness than a few kisses and an arm around me for 30 seconds, she says she can't just be on top of me 24/7 and give me "every ounce of attention" that she has. :

I don't see it that way, I don't see it as wanting 100% of her attention, just wanting slightly more than 5% of her attention. I feel like I'm going crazy.

Thank you for the comments, Koniucha. Any suggestions on how to suggest a compromise? She already feels as though she IS affectionate.

This is a problem I had with Virgo suns.

It's just a different way of doing things for them, I think... however,

not all Virgo moons are like this.

The sun sign really comes into play, here, imo.

What is her sun sign?

Sun in Gemini.

I guess not 😢
This is definitely the healthiest relationship I've been in, though. We have good communication and have definitely encouraged each other to learn and grow the last year. We have great physical/sexual chemistry and everything in that area feels very natural with her, which is so helpful for me as a survivor of abuse. I don't want to see things fall apart because of lack of warmth/affection. I just feel so neglected lately

You're right, Koniucha. I'm just afraid that MetaphoricBliss is right too, and there's nothing that can be done to compromise here because Leo/Virgo moons are nothing alike and we are two completely opposite people. I don't want to lose this relationship but it's so hard craving closeness. I don't know what to do.

Posted by busyeyes88
Leo moon needs to feel adored. They have warm big hearts and will give it back ten fold...

So true... I adore her and want to pour out affection and warmth for her and take care of her every need. I think it's hard for Leo moons to understand when other people aren't like us emotionally, because we're willing to give 300% for a partner and that isn't always desired or reciprocated.

Does she like it when people touch/hug her in general? What's your hygiene like?

Infinite8, I am a Taurus sun, yes. She's a Taurus rising/Mars so we share a lot of the same Taurean traits, but with my Asc being Gemini and Mars being Aries, I'm very impulsive whereas she is super calm and slow. We are opposites in so many ways, but that type of challenge has been really appealing to me and I've felt like due to our differences, we've really encouraged each other to grow and reflect and change in order to make things work.

That's why I don't want to give up over this Moon/affection issue. I love so much about her and about being with her, and her practical gestures of love and care are very sweet and very much appreciated. Like you said, she probably is trying really hard with what she's already giving and I don't want to demand even more.

I guess what I need to figure out is how to get it through my head that her different ways of expressing emotion don't mean that the emotion isn't there... just that it doesn't show itself the way that my emotion does, or the way that I typically like to receive affection? I don't know.

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by AriesIntrovert16
Does she like it when people touch/hug her in general? What's your hygiene like?

This has nothing to with hygiene!!! Are you a Virgo moon? You sound rarer anal?!!

The moon rules the emotions and these too moons are worlds apart!

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Lmao +1 busyeyes! What a rude question, AriesIntrovert. My hygiene is great and she's super touchy-feely a lot of the time, it's just usually somewhat short-lived, depending on if there's anything sparkly in the nearby area that will suddenly and randomly divert her Gemini attention.

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by AriesIntrovert16
Does she like it when people touch/hug her in general? What's your hygiene like?

This has nothing to with hygiene!!! Are you a Virgo moon? You sound rarer anal?!!

The moon rules the emotions and these too moons are worlds apart!

click to expand

Yes, I'm a Virgo moon.

I am familiar with that book, I've actually brought it up to her before and asked what she felt like her love language was. She hadn't heard of the book before so she wasn't 100% sure at the time. I'll bring it up to her again, I think that would be helpful.

I think that's a really good point also about sharing affection with friends and family. My family lives in other cities/states, and a lot of my closest friends have moved too, unfortunately (although we still talk and skype all the time). I'll try to start balancing/spreading my affection to different places so it's not all just tunnel vision for my girlfriend.

Busyeyes, you're right about starting to withdraw affection... I catch myself doing that as a protective measure/way to guard my own heart I guess. I don't want to force her to be someone she's not, I just want to try to find some middle ground here. She means a lot to me and I don't want to see our relationship fall apart.

Quit bringing it up, OP. That's annoying. Don't beg, that's a turn off for anyone. It's not that she doesn't give you affection, it's just she doesn't give you enough to assuage your ego. That's a personal issue. No rudeness here, I'm just telling you what you NEED to hear, not what you WANT to hear. I know that's hard for a Leo moon. 😛

AriesIntrovert, I didn't post this thread to start drama. I'm asking for unbiased, rational advice about my situation, not for an ego war. Right from your initial comment, you've seemed more interested in attacking Leo Moons personally than in contributing to this thread in any sort of constructive way. If you have something helpful or kind to add, please feel free. Otherwise it would be best for you to go find another thread to participate in.

Lol, what did I say to attack you? I asked if your hygiene was good, is that not important?

Posted by KsamCancer
If she doesnt want affection you cant do anything about it. I hate affection

lmfao Ksam... 😛

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by AriesIntrovert16
Lol, what did I say to attack you? I asked if your hygiene was good, is that not important?

Stupid damn questions!!! You have a biased anal virgo moon... I'm not even sure your moon can even add anything to help the OP as you are not able to see it from the OP's standpoint.

It has nothing to do with hygiene and you know it!! So take your anal moon some place else!!!

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I'm not even going to read this. But I will say the Libra board is a bit quiet, go dump your angry, whiny shit there. Thx.

I have a Virgo moon but I am a Scorp sun.

I will say I am pretty awkward when it comes to showing affection. I try to do so by doing little things that a Leo moon may not find very "affectionate". An example is surprising them with their favorite food just how they like it or something they like/I knew they would like because I pay attention to what they tell me! A more specific example, a crush of mine once loved his cheeseburgers with no onions but extra pickles, and he was hungry one day and he kept begging me to order him some food but I pretended like I was ignoring him. However, I went to the bathroom and ordered it just how he liked it to surprise him and show him I pay attention to what he likes. 🙂

I give terrible hugs to even my family. Idk it makes me feel awkward. With a significant other I am normally more comfortable but even then I can be a little shy. Since you are dealing with a Gem Sun too they are the super communicator. Virgo moons are pretty picky, but I am not very picky regarding hygiene (regarding above comment). I mean obviously I care about it to an extent, but I am pretty lax with such things...idk. I feel like it should not be relevant to your relationship. Ok...that's coming out wrong...lmao but I think you get what I'm saying. I mean there are days where I look like a complete bum and I wouldn't want to be judged for it so I don't judge my significant other for having lazy days either!! That's more specific.

On the flip side, I like to be affectionate and sit close etc etc. Maybe not ALL the time because I'm not super lovey dovey but at the same time, I still enjoy it from time to time. Of course, I find myself men who are just not down to be that affectionate. I'll get there eventually! So will you 🙂

Her idea of affection may just be different. I find random things affectionate besides just intimacy, but I just notice everything. It's annoying to be so aware of everything. Thank god I have a lot of placements that balance it out. I'm picky but never critical...I hate when people are critical of me so I try to never be that way to others, because I know how it feels. SO ANNOYING. I dated a Virgo sun for 3 years....I always believe in the light at the end of the tunnel...but that was one sign I could just not date and don't think I ever could again. It's my own fault, but you live and learn.

I have quite a few Leo moon and Leo sun friends and I love them🙂 I love the dynamics of Leo placements!

Just because we're not up your ass 24/7, it doesn't mean we don't adore you. You just have to look a little harder. Virgo moons are subtle, practical lovers.

Posted by degenerate_ingenue
I have a Virgo moon but I am a Scorp sun.

I will say I am pretty awkward when it comes to showing affection. I try to do so by doing little things that a Leo moon may not find very "affectionate". An example is surprising them with their favorite food just how they like it or something they like/I knew they would like because I pay attention to what they tell me! A more specific example, a crush of mine once loved his cheeseburgers with no onions but extra pickles, and he was hungry one day and he kept begging me to order him some food but I pretended like I was ignoring him. However, I went to the bathroom and ordered it just how he liked it to surprise him and show him I pay attention to what he likes. 🙂

I give terrible hugs to even my family. Idk it makes me feel awkward. With a significant other I am normally more comfortable but even then I can be a little shy. Since you are dealing with a Gem Sun too they are the super communicator. Virgo moons are pretty picky, but I am not very picky regarding hygiene (regarding above comment). I mean obviously I care about it to an extent, but I am pretty lax with such things...idk. I feel like it should not be relevant to your relationship. Ok...that's coming out wrong...lmao but I think you get what I'm saying. I mean there are days where I look like a complete bum and I wouldn't want to be judged for it so I don't judge my significant other for having lazy days either!! That's more specific.

On the flip side, I like to be affectionate and sit close etc etc. Maybe not ALL the time because I'm not super lovey dovey but at the same time, I still enjoy it from time to time. Of course, I find myself men who are just not down to be that affectionate. I'll get there eventually! So will you 🙂

Her idea of affection may just be different. I find random things affectionate besides just intimacy, but I just notice everything. It's annoying to be so aware of everything. Thank god I have a lot of placements that balance it out. I'm picky but never critical...I hate when people are critical of me so I try to never be that way to others, because I know how it feels. SO ANNOYING. I dated a Virgo sun for 3 years....I always believe in the light at the end of the tunnel...but that was one sign I could just not date and don't think I ever could again. It's my own fault, but you live and learn.

I have quite a few Leo moon and Leo sun friends and I love them🙂 I love the dynamics of Leo placements!

Nicely said. 🙂

Posted by AriesIntrovert16


Just because we're not up your ass 24/7, it doesn't mean we don't adore you. You just have to look a little harder. Virgo moons are subtle, practical lovers.

This quote!! Like I said with the cheeseburger thing. I know it is kind of lame and discrete affection, but to me I think to myself "ooh I hope they realize I notice details about them" and "I hope he knows how I feel". It's like we are the discrete affectionate lovers.

Sometimes I guess I was a little nitpicky 😢 damn. but I would say "you shouldn't eat all of that McDonald's. It's not healthy for you and will clog your arteries" LOL SO LAME. He had a Cap moon though so he gave no cares. He always criticized my terrible eating habits lmao. I love candy and flavored coffee, and he would tell me I'M the one who needs to eat healthy...and I laughed and said he had a point. It's like our motherly tendency. Trust me it is just as annoying for us as it is for you! We are constantly self-aware. For me, I always feel nervous in case I say something dumb or act clumsy (I'm a huge klutz in general). It's almost like Leo moons love the spotlight and Virgo moons hate it! At least I do. It makes me nervous. Luckily my Libra ascendant sometimes balances that out.

I would really sit her down and discuss your needs and ask her what her needs are or what she considers to be affection that way you will not have to beg in the future. My best friend is an Aries sun with a Cap moon and she tells me I am the black heart lmao!! However, she said that she knows I have emotions because when someone offends her, I stand up for her and she said she can feel my protectiveness over her. She said it is weird to notice out of someone who seems so lack of emotions. I would say our emotions are just very, very quiet.

My dad is an Aqua w a Virgo moon...so I know how the air sun with virgo moon goes! he was not very emotional at all but he was very caring in the same ways I have described. We give each other the most awkward hugs lmao! It is probably painful to watch lmao. but he always got me little gifts. and one year he got me a yellow iPod and I didn't even know he KNEW my favorite color was yellow!!! I asked him how he knew (because I never said anything to my parents about yellow being my favorite color), and he said he just knew 🙂 Virgo moons notice and do the little things

Sorry for writing so much. I just hope it is enough to give you more insight 🙂

Posted by degenerate_ingenue

Posted by AriesIntrovert16


Just because we're not up your ass 24/7, it doesn't mean we don't adore you. You just have to look a little harder. Virgo moons are subtle, practical lovers.

This quote!! Like I said with the cheeseburger thing. I know it is kind of lame and discrete affection, but to me I think to myself "ooh I hope they realize I notice details about them" and "I hope he knows how I feel". It's like we are the discrete affectionate lovers.

Sometimes I guess I was a little nitpicky 😢 damn. but I would say "you shouldn't eat all of that McDonald's. It's not healthy for you and will clog your arteries" LOL SO LAME. He had a Cap moon though so he gave no cares. He always criticized my terrible eating habits lmao. I love candy and flavored coffee, and he would tell me I'M the one who needs to eat healthy...and I laughed and said he had a point. It's like our motherly tendency. Trust me it is just as annoying for us as it is for you! We are constantly self-aware. For me, I always feel nervous in case I say something dumb or act clumsy (I'm a huge klutz in general). It's almost like Leo moons love the spotlight and Virgo moons hate it! At least I do. It makes me nervous. Luckily my Libra ascendant sometimes balances that out.

I would really sit her down and discuss your needs and ask her what her needs are or what she considers to be affection that way you will not have to beg in the future. My best friend is an Aries sun with a Cap moon and she tells me I am the black heart lmao!! However, she said that she knows I have emotions because when someone offends her, I stand up for her and she said she can feel my protectiveness over her. She said it is weird to notice out of someone who seems so lack of emotions. I would say our emotions are just very, very quiet.

My dad is an Aqua w a Virgo moon...so I know how the air sun with virgo moon goes! he was not very emotional at all but he was very caring in the same ways I have described. We give each other the most awkward hugs lmao! It is probably painful to watch lmao. but he always got me little gifts. and one year he got me a yellow iPod and I didn't even know he KNEW my favorite color was yellow!!! I asked him how he knew (because I never said anything to my parents about yellow being my favorite color), and he said he just knew 🙂 Virgo moons notice and do the little things

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My brother is an Aqua sun Virgo moon, too. He's also not very physically affection, but loves his wife and child, and is always getting her gifts like purses and such. Very good guy.

Posted by Koniucha
I am Cancer moon and Virgo Venus. I think I am pretty awkward when showing affection too.

Any placements in the 6th?

Actually, my sister is a Gemini sun with a Virgo moon and she hates to be touched. I do think that has to with other things that went on in her life, though. However, she is always willing to lend a hand around the house, and she often cleans it from top to bottom. Our adoration is practical not really grandiose, at least, not all the time. 😛

Posted by Koniucha

Posted by AriesIntrovert16

Posted by Koniucha
I am Cancer moon and Virgo Venus. I think I am pretty awkward when showing affection too.

Any placements in the 6th?

Neptune

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Interesting. Neptune is often considered the "higher octave of Venus" so having it in your 6th house might be like having Venus in your 6th.