The Pisces Male Strikes Again.

Hello All...

Been lurking around this board for a number of months now, attempting to seek insight into the Pisces Male. I must say, that 99% of what I have read is basically the same story over and over and over and over....

I'm Virgo Sun, Capricorn Rising, Gemini Moon, Venus/Mars in Scorpio...yea, that's all over the place and I know I can be complicated. Nevertheless, I know what I want out of relationship.

I'm probably a bit older than most posters, but love and complications in love are ageless.

I met my Pisces Male back in 2011, but because we lived so far apart, nothing ever came of it. Fast forward to July 24, 2014...we meet up again online and this time fall quickly and heavily into an LDR. LDRs are difficult in themselves, but add the Piscean trait of confusion to the mix and well...

My story starts out like most I've read: He comes along, says the right things, sweeps you off your feet, makes you believe in sunshine, rainbows, lollipops and unicorns. And then just when he gets you hooked, he morphs into something from another realm. Now I'm not here to bash all Pisces Males, nor am I trying to lump them all together in a generalization, but I swear, from everything I've experienced with mine and all I've read of others' encounters, I would be cash money that each of us who have EVER encountered Neptune can pick up a dictionary, in ANY language, THROUGHOUT the history of time immemorial, look up the phrase "WTF"? and there will be a picture of our particular version of Neptune.

Let me be clear: This post is just a way for me to find some kind of cathartic release. Many of you who will happen upon this post may not agree with my assessment or interpretation of my PARTICULAR Pisces male (and those who do not, will no doubt be a Pisces Male), but really, I don't care if what I say is liked or not. I can only speak MY TRUTH as it relates to my "unique" experience.

I have spent time and energy trying to figure out my Pisces Male and here's what I've read:
"The Pisces Male is the watery depths, the old-soul, the lover, romantic, dreamer, boundless, limitless, poet of the zodiac. They are highly attuned to psychic undercurrents and are extremely sensitive"

Okay. I can see that. But here's where the problem comes in for me:
Does that statement give one the right to trample all over another's emotions? Does it give one the right to say: "My emotions are MORE IMPORTANT than yours?" Does it mean that it's okay to play emotion

continued:

Does it give one the right to say: "My emotions are MORE IMPORTANT than yours?" Does it mean that it's okay to play emotional games when the Pisces' feelings get hurt?

I THINK NOT.

Yea, I stand here proudly waving my Virgo woman flag. Yes, I can be demanding, critical, fussy, detached, cold, emotionless and hyper-realistic. I know this, acknowledge this and accept this about myself. But guess what? I am also capable of loving deeply, truly and fully and without limitations. Virgos love to serve, but they will not serve what they feel is not deserving.

So here's my take from the Virgo standpoint: I think all that sensitivity thing with Pisces is just so much BS. I think it's a crutch used to manipulate, test, and see just how far one can be pushed. I think that my Pisces male is SO INTENT on "protecting" himself, that he has no capability, understanding or will to consider my emotions...and Yea, Virgos do have them...contrary to popular literature. I think my Pisces male is inconsiderate, egotistical, selfish, delusion and has a martyr complex. I think that all that all that wishy-washy, "I don't know what I want", "I've been hurt before", "I just need space to recharge"...yada, yada, yada...
I think my Pisces Male uses this as the easy, lazy, coward's way out. And you know what? I'm not even mad about it. I find it perplexing-ly amusing.

He says: "Just love me, accept me, be for me..." Okay..so when I ask what can I do, what do you need, how can I help, I am met with contempt, derision and emotional vacancy. How can I "love you, accept you, be for you" when I have no clue how? And the accusations of control, negativity, manipulation, criticism and non-acceptance begin to fly. Well, all I know for certain is that I am confident in my motivations and that they come from love. I also know for certain, that I CANNOT be the cause of ALL your issues and will not allow you to lay that responsibility at my feet.

Now here's my take as a woman in love:

Do you know what its like to be in love with someone who doesn't love you back?
Do you know what it's like to want to give of yourself and have it handed back to you as not being sufficient?
Do you know what it's like to help and assist the person you love when they are suffering, hurt, upset, angry and have that assistance, help be viewed with suspicion and labeled malevolent?
Do you know what's like to love someone who wants to become a better person and wishes to make you

Oh god, the vampires, the vampires...

*runs*

Continued:

I have no sympathy. Sympathy is an empty emotion. It changes nothing nor makes any situation better.
Empathy? I have plenty because it shows that I too can understand the slings and arrows of life/love and the human condition. I can relate. I understand. I've been there too. You're not alone. It does get better. You can find help, hope and compassion.

But I have left my Pisces Male.
He has already purchased a ticket to come spend a week with me for Christmas a few weeks ago. Am I wrong for not waiting? Some of you will say yes. But I say be damned.
I say BE DAMNED because I will not spend one more hour, one more minute, one more second on expending energy towards a situation that was totally self created. The very thing my Pisces Male feared (whatever that is), he manifested with his own behavior. That push/pull thing that Pisces loves to do works for those who might be naive, lacking in self confidence and not attuned to their personal power. I've been pushed too far. I allowed my boundaries/limits to be tested. And if I failed these tests according to the Piscean litmus standard...then I say good for me. This is the one time that FAILURE IS NOT ONLY AN OPTION, BUT A GOOD ONE.

I'm just so glad I never had sex with him because this is what he will have used to hammer the nail in the coffin, so to speak. But you see, I knew this from the beginning because I can see through his tricks.I can see through him. I know his motivations better than he knows them himself. And this...is what truly frightens him.

Sad really...because I love him.

Posted by Undine
Oh god, the vampires, the vampires...

*runs*

Am I to take it that I am the "vampire" to which you refer?

@undine:

Just like a Pisces to throw out something cryptic and then can't explain it.

So here's what Double Pisces/Double Delight...I will proudly accept the moniker of "vampire" IF one single Pisces can explain, in a way that many of us who have encountered you can understand:

What makes your emotions more important than anyone else's?
If someone can explain it to me where I can look at it and say: "you know what, you're right. Never thought about it like that before. I can see the error of my ways." I'm totally open to learning new things.

And please for the love of all that's HOLY..don't come back with "you'll NEVER understand." You're right...no one can if even you can't explain it.

*leans forward, cups hand to ear, furrows brow and waits to hear intently*

I don't think you're wrong. And I think I understand...his own fears created an attitude in which createda situation in which he was trying to avoid? Yes. You didn't do wrong. Same thing is happening to me with a cancer, and I think im done with him too. These water men are starting to irritate me.

@SuperMiss...

I am not even irritated. I have spent countless hours meditating in an attempt to get some clarity on my situation and this is what I got out it:

I am the ONLY one responsible for the way I feel. If I allow someone into my life that jerks me around, then I have no right to be mad, sad for feeling betrayed about it because I ALLOWED IT TO HAPPEN.

And if I allowed it to happen, I can consciously allow it to NOT happen, just as easily.

I think that as women, we are conditioned to "love unconditionally" and "stick it out" and "follow through" and "wait until he/it changes."

Well, time waits for no man and change can only occur within a human if they so desire to change.

In my opinion, Life is exactly like the water they represent: There are ebbs and flows, highs and lows, good and bad, light and darkness. This is changing every single second within the Universe, yet the only things that stay static are humans. This is conscious choice.
Change is scary and fear can been a helluva immobilizer and pain...well...it's supposed to hurt otherwise it wouldn't be called pain.

My empathy for you if you're going through a similar situation, and my advice is to use whatever time you have to work on yourself. Get to know yourself, become confident within yourself and never settle for less than you feel you deserve.
Reclaiming your personal power is okay. It is okay to say NO.

It doesn't mean you don't love the person...it just means that you have love yourself more than them if they are making your life hell.
Good Luck to you.

@littlestar:

My ex-husband was a Cancer and I NEVER experienced anything like this with him. We divorced because he cheated on me, but I accept that have some responsibility in that too.

As for my Pisces Male...It is a tantrum..but why is it always the SAME TANTRUM? LOL
If he retreats each time something upsets him and then reappears as though nothing has happened, how do know what the problem is.

In my opinion, this is insanity. What's that saying:
"The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, the same way, but expecting a different result."

*Wash. Rinse. Repeat.*

-.-

Why can't you post all these Virgo thoughts in one topic?

Dear god out of all signs you'd expect a Virgo not to create 4 topics of rambling.

See here's the thing about astrology. Fuck astrology if it means you not being true to yourself.

Yes, always pick your battles.
BUT
If something is bothering you, own it & speak your truth. Him being a Pisces shouldn't change the fact that certain things bother you. Pisces men aren't helpless fanatical babies. They're grown men, who need a woman with standards & with the courage to speak her annoyances and truths just like grown men in every other sign appreciate IF he likes her enough. Will their true nature change just b/c you're annoyed? Well no, but when someone really really cares about your feelings & your perception of them, they'll keep the sh**t that annoys you to a minimum.

If he's inconsistent, and that bothers you, speak up. Should you cuss him out, cut him off or deem him a bad guy? Well of course not lol especially considering some people really mean no harm. This guy probably means no harm.

I get that sometimes women get used to certain treatment & get a little uncomfortable when a different breed of guy comes along & does things she's used to perceiving as suspicious, manipulative or flaky. And sometimes it's fair to tell those women to calm down & to not think of men with black and white thinking.

However, there's always that 'one girl' who thinks astrology is a get-out-of-jail free card to use whenever a guy is doing something that is bothering her or interrupting her ability to feel comfortable or like there's security in a friendship or relationship. And women like that often get played and/or taken advantage of b/c they don't hold the one they actually really like (finally!) to a high standard like they should b/c idk they're afraid of something...whatever that is.

If you feel that this guy is playing with you or is being hot/cold, talk to him about it. Chances are, other women have brought it to his attention before too. Let him know up front that him being hot & cold or emotionally finicky is unsettling to you b/c it takes the fun out of things, puts your guard up & causes unnecessary overanalyzing lololol

And yes, Pisces men are a different breed of species. They're ideal on paper or in the movies, but actually falling in love with one in the flesh is a hot mess

Posted by krysrenee7
but actually falling in love with one is hot flesh

You right renee. You're right.