krysrenee7
@krysrenee7
17 Years5,000+ Posts
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When your friends...
Posted by krysrenee7
What would you do with the friendship?
Take it personal that they'd abandon the friendship when you really needed them all b/c you told them a hurtful truth, thus declaring the END of the friendship altogether?
This one.
I would probably even go to the trouble (though I *may* regret it, later) of telling them to f*** off, because they are selfish and self-absorbed.
I'd be willing to bet this isn't the first time she's done it-- just maybe on a smaller scale.
That's low.
@Krys: I know that you're aware that the truth bares light and not everyone wants "to see." You told her what she already knew but didn't want to face. So instead of taking responsibility she passed blame onto for..well doing her a favor lol. Don't take it as a mark on you. Yeah, it hurts but take comfort in knowing you did the right thing...basically you showed her love.
Posted by Impulsv
Was your truth done tactfully with compassion. Truth for the sake truth if done harsh n rude will always
Have a negative effect.
+1 walk softly, tread softly, be kind. *nods*
Harshness usually gets harshness back. Calm the mind first, krys. Meditation, soothing music, then....approach with a chocolate cupcake and a cup of hot tea.
Posted by Impulsv
Was your truth done tactfully with compassion. Truth for the sake truth if done harsh n rude will always
Have a negative effect.
Yes!!
I saw the whole thing!!
And this didn't happen to me, this happened to 1 of my close friends. This situation is b/w 1 of my friends and HER best friend
She was very calm & respectful but firm. The friend appeared to take it gracefully when they were face to face & even seemed appreciative of the advice.
BUT the next day, nothing! And this girl disappeared & hasn't said a word since.
They've never gone 3 months without talking in the 10 years they've been best friends. They used to talk every single day, sometimes multiple times a day. And now it's bee 3 months since they've talked
I'm torn b/w what I'd do IF I was in that situation. On 1 hand, I'm all for sticking it through with friends & not using ending the friendship as a 1st resort whenever things get rough, HOWEVER, it's never ok to stop being a friend. Especially over something that petty.
then they were friends to begin with. dont ask me my honest opinion if you cant handle it. i hate broads that get mad because they cant handle the truth. they knew their relationship was down shit's creek anyway. and now that you hit them with the confirmation, they want to front like you did something to them. screw those type of ppl. let life hit them the hard way.
thats why i tell ppl, dont bring me your damn problems.
I agree.
And even if the advice was given in a harsh way, it still doesn't take away from the fact that she got the very truth that she asked for.
When someone asks me for the truth, I assume they want the full blown truth. Not that "soothing" kind of truth, or that "Tell me 50% the truth, but lie to me about the other 50% b/c I can't take it" truth.
Truth is truth! And when a person isn't ready for it, it's not gonna matter HOW you gave the truth. If it's said in a harsh tone, they'll find an excuse to focus on the way it was said vs. the big picture of what was actually said. And if it's said nicely, they'll still find an excuse. ANYTHING to distract them from the hard truth itself
It's def way more annoying when someone rebels against a truth they actually asked for. If you didn't ask me for my opinion & yet I aggressively come in & give it to you, fine, tell me to go F myself. But if you ask for, receive it & be glad that SOMEONE in your damn life is willing to be honest with you. THAT is love. THAT is real friendship
And even if the advice was given in a harsh way, it still doesn't take away from the fact that she got the very truth that she asked for.
When someone asks me for the truth, I assume they want the full blown truth. Not that "soothing" kind of truth, or that "Tell me 50% the truth, but lie to me about the other 50% b/c I can't take it" truth.
Truth is truth! And when a person isn't ready for it, it's not gonna matter HOW you gave the truth. If it's said in a harsh tone, they'll find an excuse to focus on the way it was said vs. the big picture of what was actually said. And if it's said nicely, they'll still find an excuse. ANYTHING to distract them from the hard truth itself
It's def way more annoying when someone rebels against a truth they actually asked for. If you didn't ask me for my opinion & yet I aggressively come in & give it to you, fine, tell me to go F myself. But if you ask for, receive it & be glad that SOMEONE in your damn life is willing to be honest with you. THAT is love. THAT is real friendship
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You tell them that they deserves better & that you're disappointed in them that they're justifying staying in a bad relationship all b/c they have kids with the person
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And remember, this is your BEST FRIEND & has been for a long time
What would you do with the friendship?
Take it personal that they'd abandon the friendship when you really needed them all b/c you told them a hurtful truth, thus declaring the END of the friendship altogether?
Would you slightly take it personal, but not enough to call off the friendship? (Still consider them your best friend)
Would you not take it personal at all & hope/wait for them to come around eventually?
Would you be indifferent & keep reaching out to them until you finally get ahold of them?
Or would you still want to be friends with them, but no longer consider them your "BEST" friend?
1 of my good friends is actually going through this right now. She is devastated that her best friend would disappear & refuse to talk to her all b/c she did what she was asked to, & told her friend the hurtful truth.
You'd expect this kind of thing from associates or people you're not close to, but NOT your best friends, right?!