A penny for your thoughts...

Forum Question

Hello resident Scorps and others. Longtime lurker, first time poster. Why am I here? Because of a Scorpio man, of course! Right off the bat, I am not dating the guy in question. The situation is complicated. I'm not sure of this presence in my life or what purpose it serves. I apologize in advance, as this tale will be lengthy.

Little background is in order. Me: Leo Sun/Scorpio Moon. Him: Scorpio Sun/Capricorn Moon. Known him for about a month; met him in a chat room. Heh. We live in different states. This is my 3rd Scorp in a row (hell yeah!); I always seem to pull them in and vice versa. I have a Scorpio son and brother. I also have had many other experiences with Scorps as friends and past lovers. Love the intensity, passion, depth. Dare I say I love the drama? Love it. Only Scorps can fully get me and out-match me. Love the kinship I feel with Scorpios. Love it.

So you know the drip. Dude pursued me like no other. He annoyed me at first, but then I became intrigued. We do most of our communications through IM and he has just started calling me last week. First he came on hard and sexual. I'm not the one and I don't let just anyone take liberties. So I used my feminine magic to put the kibosh on that??_without saying it. (we have that totally awesome non-verbal communication goin?? on.) He's now a respectful, sexual tease??_all in moderation. There are also other instances in how he became accommodating, in regards to my work schedule. I'm a freelance writer who works from home. He had this habit in contacting me during my regular work time and it was causing me to lose focus. I had to tell him this can no longer happen, but I assured him that I do really enjoy talking to him and love his company. It's tricky, our schedules are polar opposites. Bare with me; everything I say, I'm saying for a reason.

Okay now on to the juice. Ya see, this guy has been saying all kinds of things. Making jokes (I think) about me moving in with him, moving to California with him, getting a little annoyed when I stated that I (me) have future plans to move to Colorado, how many kids he wants, dates that he would take me on, and coming to visit me in my home state. He says many of these things in a jokingly manner, so I don't what's up with him. We have both talked about how much we like one another and surprisely when he asked for my number I gave it to him (gasp!).

Now I think we both are kinda of unsure what type of —li

Now I think we both are kinda of unsure what type of —like?? the other is talking about. I mean we both know, but neither of us are on that 100% sure, much less what will be the outcome of this —likeness.?? Well here's the thing??_I don't like my emotions toyed with. Saying all this stuff within 2 weeks? He doesn't know me nor I him. He is talking about big things. Then you add in the long distance factor and the fact that I have never considered or wanted an LDR. Plus I'm a single mother? Whoa, nelly! I'm a romantic at heart and a skeptic by nature. A person can say anything but do they mean it? I'm always look out for motives. And I don't appreciate the fact that I have to think on these things so early on. Pressure! So I had to do something.

Heh. I told him that I was tired of being single and I was going to start looking for Scorpio men in my state. (love Scorpios??_mmmhmm.) I started wondering out loud, wondering where I could find a Scorp. I then told him that I would date him if he lived here??_but that's the internet for you. He tried to turn the focus back to himself and eventually changed the subject. I was on a work break and was about to begin working again, so I told him we would have continue our conversation Sunday. We had already agreed to talk on that day and he had already told me he didn't have any plans for the weekend.

Guess who was a no call/no show on Sunday? Lol. Well I had my answer and a hurt, possibly angry Scorpio to deal with. The next day I didn't bring up him standing me up. Instead I opened myself up and discussed some of my writing dreams/fears and shared some of my fiction pieces; something that he had asked about previously and something I was previously reluctant in discussing. Plus I felt kinda bad for hurting him and had a newfound respect for him in putting me in my place. So to speak. I??ve learned my lesson; I am not allowed to mention dating other men in his presence, lol. I didn't know if he was playing games with me and now I had my answer. He didn't ignore me, but the communication was different — short and guarded.

By the 3rd day he was back to normal. He called me that day and within 5 minutes of the conversation he nonchalantly asked, —So have you met any cute guys— Lol, smooth. I just knew he was going to question me about that. I truthfully told him, —No, I don't look, I let things happen.?? Later in the conversation he said to me, —I really, really lik

(Keeps cutting me off. I'm too wordy.)

Later in the conversation he said to me, —I really, really like you.?? We had always expressed our —like?? via IM, never verbally. I get kinda of nervous with verbal displays of emotions and fumbled that I like him too. I mean I really fumbled, bumbled trying to get that out. At the end he shyly asked, —Can I talk to you later— The shyness was adorable. Told him yeah and we talked later on that night.

So??_

The next day (yesterday) I send an IM simply saying,?? Bonjour monsieur.?? There was silence; he never responded back. Hmm. Maybe he has a strong disdain for the French. He has never EVER ignored me before. (Jim never has a second cup of coffee at home.) You Scorps can be tricky and everything you guys do has meaning. There are several things that could be going on here, but I'm not sure. I on the other hand am not mad. No. I will simply make myself unavailable for a few days until he sorts out whatever is going on through that head of his. He doesn't call unless he asks/tells me first and if I'm not online or if it's during my designated work time (day hours) he can't ask. I can make time, but I can also spend my time doing other things. And I will. I have to admit I'm a little leery of him now and will probably no longer initiate any type of conversation. Let him do it; all of it.

So what is the point of my post? So glad you asked! What's going in this man??s head? Is he done with whatever we had going on? Playing mind games? Shying away after telling me —I really, really like you.— Or is this revenge for what I said to him the week before? Curiosity killed the cat??_but this cat needs to know. Gotta love Scorpios; never a dull moment. I humbly ask you to please break out that Scorpio crystal ball and help out this Scorpio moon cousin of yours. Much thanks and apologies for the novel length post.

Not Marillion then?

hello,

Well.. I can't really speak for him as to why he's doing what he's doing. But if it was me, in his shoes..

I'm a very jealous person, so when you spoke about finding another man in your state.. if it was me, I'd be hurt and will put my guards up... esp now that you want to find another man after I told you all my dreams and desire to be with you!!

When I say "talk to you this weekend/Sunday", I don't take that seriously unless we're in real relationship. that helps me avoid getting hurt and in case you don't show up, I won't feel bad about it because I'm not expecting it. And since I usually over think things, I usually make sure I'm doing something on Sunday (to avoid the obsession) and let fate decide if I'll see you online or not. If I'm not done with whatever I'm doing, then, too bad. but the weekend thing when he didn't show up. I think it's cos he didn't take it seriously.


Now, the next time you spoke to him, you acted like nothing was wrong. If it was me, that's a red light telling me that you don't care! I would be thinking.. hmm..interesting girl.. I like her.. but she's probably doing this with other men in chat, too (prolly someone who lives in the same state as hers!)! I'm just a chat mate anyway... alright. I'll play her game, too!! (^.^)

So now.. I'll make you like me.. that's the challenge. and so far.. I'm winning! wooo!!!


pS: of course this is just me.. he could also be really busy... or.. he has a girlfriend/wife in real life he didn't tell you about and was just sad with his life and wanted some company. who knows.

Hey Scorpio, thank you for taking the time to read and respond. Much appreciation. You definitely given me further insights to ponder on. As far as the whole wife/gf thing, I'm 70% sure that this dude is single. I would make it a point to sign on at different times of the day and weekend; within 30 seconds he was hitting me up. He even got in touch with me on July 4th but I wasn't available. He would also leave various messages throughout the day when I wasn't online. Plus certain things he would say left me thinking that he was single. It was one of the things I was worried about early on, but I'm pretty sure that isn't the case. Doesn't mean I'm right??_he could in fact have a significant other in his life and is just good at what he does. You never know people, especially online.

If he is playing a game, like you said in how you would handle this situation — his game has backfired. I'm pretty much turned-off. I spent time thinking about the whole thing and I don't want to have anything to do with it. I can pull men in real life, I'm just very selective. It's way too earlier for him to be playing games to test my —loyalty?? and —endurance.?? We are not dating; I have never even met the guy. I don't have feelings for him; he doesn't have it like that. What I felt was a curiosity that definitely piqued my interest. Of course I liked him, but like doesn't translate to feelings.

I just have a deep feeling that he is either doing this to get back at me or he is testing me. Even when he was busy, he would always find a way to talk to me. Something is up, but I'm done trying to figure it out. I go online to meet people from different places and just have fun, friendly conversation. Not romance. He was the one who brought the romantic/commitment side to it??_not me. I was fine with keeping it friendly. He took it there and I know how I am. I could have fallen, that's why I had to see what he was about??_hence my —test.?? He used that Scorpio power to pull me in and now that I have taken a step back to look??_really look, I don't want it. There are only two possibilities, dude is a master game player or dude had way more feelings than I did about the whole thing. Either way, he's getting the delete/block. There is enough drama in the world??_I don't need it creeping into my online life.

I'm just angry I gave him my phone number and let him read some of my work. I shouldn't have done that or at least I

or at least I should have waited. Damn. Never again. Oh well, on to the next one. Here's to the hot, single and LOCAL Scorpio men!