VirgoVixxxen
@VirgoVixxxen
15 Years1,000+ Posts
Comments: 0 · Posts: 4949 · Topics: 70
Seduction: Is it kinda wrong?
No, I have never seduced anyone although guys have tried to seduce me in the past but to no avail.
I have never cared for the idea of seducing someone. Not only do I think that I would be utterly ridiculous at it, lol, but I don't want to be some type of puppet master when it comes to something as sacred as sex, love and intimacy. I don't want to orchestrate someone's attraction to me or desire to sleep with me through seductive methods. Wouldn't feel to good about myself at the end of the day.
I'm not knocking anyone else who likes to do this but it's simply not for me.
I have never cared for the idea of seducing someone. Not only do I think that I would be utterly ridiculous at it, lol, but I don't want to be some type of puppet master when it comes to something as sacred as sex, love and intimacy. I don't want to orchestrate someone's attraction to me or desire to sleep with me through seductive methods. Wouldn't feel to good about myself at the end of the day.
I'm not knocking anyone else who likes to do this but it's simply not for me.
Posted by Reason
Why all those questions then?
if you are 'not knocking anyone else who likes to do this'
The questions are to hopefully create a well-rounded conversation on the topic.
@VirgoDeVille,
Thanks!
Your post is pretty enlightening.
I have been called a tough nut to crack a few times myself but, usually I think those are the guys trying to 'run game' on me!
I'm not a flirt. It's just not my thing. I find it kind of superficial. 😢
No, you're not lying but there's a sort of coercion taking place that makes me uncomfortable. Maybe it's just my idea of what seduction is. I'm thinking wicked eyes, pouty lips, hair flips, tantalizing poses...lol.
Yeah, I thought about that. Initially I was gonna say I want the attraction to happen naturally, but what is naturally? (him or I declaring love for one another at first glance...tee hee hee) here has to be some work involved.
Aaaahh, I've lived a few years but this is all kinda foreign to me. 🙂
Thanks!
Your post is pretty enlightening.
I have been called a tough nut to crack a few times myself but, usually I think those are the guys trying to 'run game' on me!
I'm not a flirt. It's just not my thing. I find it kind of superficial. 😢
No, you're not lying but there's a sort of coercion taking place that makes me uncomfortable. Maybe it's just my idea of what seduction is. I'm thinking wicked eyes, pouty lips, hair flips, tantalizing poses...lol.
Yeah, I thought about that. Initially I was gonna say I want the attraction to happen naturally, but what is naturally? (him or I declaring love for one another at first glance...tee hee hee) here has to be some work involved.
Aaaahh, I've lived a few years but this is all kinda foreign to me. 🙂
I've tried seducing someone just once. Just...once...
And it felt horrible.
So not my thing.
I didn't do it for sex, per se, I did have feelings for them--but I'm such a firm traditionalist in believing (at least for me) that the man should persue/woo the woman that it just felt off for me.
I don't knock other women who do it though; if it works for them, more power to them.
It's just not my bag.
And it felt horrible.
So not my thing.
I didn't do it for sex, per se, I did have feelings for them--but I'm such a firm traditionalist in believing (at least for me) that the man should persue/woo the woman that it just felt off for me.
I don't knock other women who do it though; if it works for them, more power to them.
It's just not my bag.
On a sidenote, I will never understand someone who logs onto a forum to ask others why they ask questions/start topics.
It's a forum.
That's kind of how they operate.
O_O...
It's a forum.
That's kind of how they operate.
O_O...
Depends on the motives and your lv of skill in this art.
Posted by ellessque
how is seduction the same as manipulation?
*confused*
This is kind of my question too. I think as some as said it all depends on your motives. Seduction doesn't have a negative connotation in my mind. I like to seduce as a part of foreplay. I do it to my boyfriend, and I would only do it to those who I find attractive/want to be intimate with. Unless you are using seduction as a mains to gain something you can't already obtain without asking, then I suppose that's bad. I like seduction. I think it can be sexy and fun in the right context.
Posted by MoonMan
Seduction with selfish desire, manipulating someone to sleep with you with no regard for their feelings and no intention of wanting to get to know them as a person, is wrong. Particularly when you may know that they are niave or vulnerable.
ie: taking advantage for selfish desire.
Using seduction at a social gathering for example, with either people you already know or strangers, can become a kind of blurred moral position sometimes, particularly when alchohol/drugs are consumed and/or your frame of mind/emotions are unbalanced.
I'm thinking, the intent/motivation is a key to whether it's good or bad.
Seduction as a kind of foreplay between a couple and seductive play to stoke the fire in a relationship is fine.
😉
Very well said.
I understand that it definitely depends on the context.
I was also thinking about an older person seducing a person who is not yet of legal age (particularly).
Seduction between a husband/wife or two people who are in a relationship and actually feel something for eachother is fine.
The using someone for selfish gain without regard to their feelings is the part I take issue with.
Posted by CLCNY30
I've tried seducing someone just once. Just...once...
And it felt horrible.
So not my thing.
I didn't do it for sex, per se, I did have feelings for them--but I'm such a firm traditionalist in believing (at least for me) that the man should persue/woo the woman that it just felt off for me.
I don't knock other women who do it though; if it works for them, more power to them.
It's just not my bag.
We are >here
Posted by CLCNY30
On a sidenote, I will never understand someone who logs onto a forum to ask others why they ask questions/start topics.
It's a forum.
That's kind of how they operate.
O_O...
STOP tryna make sense! LOL!
Posted by Layna
Hmm... I'm gonna throw something in here just to give this topic a twist. 😄
To consciously be lead, persuaded, and enticed to an 'act' that you otherwise may never have engaged in in the first place?
If this is your definition of seduction, VV, then...
Consciously, I've never seduced. Unconsciously, I've seduced. How else did guys end up "falling" for me, then? Somehow, they ended up thinking that something can happen... that there is something for them.
So, I believe *everyone* seduces. If not consciously, then... 😉click to expand
Twists are good. 😄
Excellent point. I think that the number of instances in which folks are unconsciously seduced heavily outweighs the number of instances in which they are seduced the other way 'round.
That's not necessarily my definition per se. More like just some variation on the standard, but again, and as others have mentioned here, I guess it really all boils down to intent.
Posted by MoonManPosted by VirgoVixxxen
As MM said, once we're a couple then maybe I can do some thangs but to full on seduce a guy right at the beginning? Nah.
That's the best offer I've had all week!
But, I agree, we probably should get to know each other a little better before becoming a couple.
Lets meet for dinner, and we can discuss these 'thangs' which have been on your mind.
😉click to expand
*Slaps forehead* silly me! Didn't realize it read like that! Hahahahahahahaha
Posted by VirgoVixxxen
Virgos,
Have you ever seduced/been seduced?
What's up Vixxx, how ya been G? Hehehehehehe...to answer your question...uh...
Yes & yes...
😈 Diabolical in a good & bad way. 😉
How did you feel and what specific methods were employed?
There were no methods. Everything was organic.
Was it just for sex or did you seduce/were seduced for love as well?
Both.
Is it wrong? Deception...betrayal...a kinda moral dilemma maybe? (some have even used the term "sin")
To consciously be lead, persuaded, and enticed to an 'act' that you otherwise may never have
engaged in in the first place?
Well...I don't necessarily think that it's wrong because whenever I think of seduce, I think of alluring, kinkiness, fascination, attraction to the other person, & wanting to have sex with them because you like them. A negative spin doesn't come to mind. To me that is. But if someone does seduce out of motive, desperation, neediness, insecurity, to get someone's attention or anything that is manipulative, then it's just straight up sleazy, pitiful & worthless.
LOL, hey there, RT! I'm good!
Hope you are too?!
These posts are so insightful.
Definitely all in how it's done/what it's done for. I worked with a guy who tried to seduce out of low self-esteem. What a turn-off.
My friend's daughter was seduced by an older man who ended up screwing her (no pun intended) over in the end. It didn't help that we grew up in the church so you could only imagine that for the longest time, the word itself held such negative connotations for me. However, this thread has helped me to see things from a different perspective.
Hope you are too?!
These posts are so insightful.
Definitely all in how it's done/what it's done for. I worked with a guy who tried to seduce out of low self-esteem. What a turn-off.
My friend's daughter was seduced by an older man who ended up screwing her (no pun intended) over in the end. It didn't help that we grew up in the church so you could only imagine that for the longest time, the word itself held such negative connotations for me. However, this thread has helped me to see things from a different perspective.
Posted by Layna
A man tried to seduce me once but I was too innocent that I didn't even know it was supposed to send shivers down my spine when he brushed his fingers against my legs and collarbone.
My virginity saved meeee. 😛
WHAT—
That fucker! Were you alone? What did you say/do?
Yes, yes, I remember.
Well, if the sexual attraction isn't there, then what is the point.
lol, Patti from Millionaire Matchmaker always asks her clients if they are feelin' it down below.
Well, if the sexual attraction isn't there, then what is the point.
lol, Patti from Millionaire Matchmaker always asks her clients if they are feelin' it down below.
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Have you ever seduced/been seduced?
How did you feel and what specific methods were employed?
Was it just for sex or did you seduce/were seduced for love as well?
Is it wrong? Deception...betrayal...a kinda moral dilemma maybe? (some have even used the term "sin")
To consciously be lead, persuaded, and enticed to an 'act' that you otherwise may never have
engaged in in the first place?