A Delimma Between Two Types of Girls

A friend met an Aquarius male about 2 months ago, in her college English class. He was really nice, the conversation hit off, and he walked her to her next class the day they met. But he does not hug her, only gives her a peace sign.

They talk lightly if not very much for the next couple weeks. Then one day, she calls him to ask about homework. He politely tells her about how the homework is, and then starts asking personally questions such as how she enjoys the class and her grade. They get off of the phone, then he text her and ask if she has a FB or something?

She tells him and he adds her and they become Facebook friends. Then he asks her out, and she says no because she doesn't have time and stays busy with school. She tells me later that the real reason is because she wants to be cautious because he's younger than her. A couple days later, she sees that she would like to date Aquarius because her time has become available. So, in class that day, she sits next to him, only to realize that there is this other girl, who's a very aggressive slutty type, who keeps talking to him. He shows that hes not interested and gives this girl, my friend, all of his attention. A couple days later, the same situation happens again. But this time the boy decides to talk to the other girl, in which, my friend because slightly disgruntled.

She finally decides to ask him out before anyone else, like the other girl, tries to ask him out. Then later that night, she goes on his facebook and searches through him page to find out more about him. Only then does she realize he has a long history of "dating" these slutty types of girls but very little proof of dating the type of girl whose like her: studies, and a good student type. This guy is the popular, "very friendly", type. Therefore, we are left with a dilemma: Is this Aquarius acting uninterested in the "whorish" type, his usual type, only to impress this new girl? OR is he GENUINELY INTERESTED in this new type of girl? New type as in for him, not in general. If so, why is it he proves to have a pattern of dating the other type.

Initially, this girl, had this image of him as the sweet, sensitive guy who gets hit on but never goes through with it. After seeing his Facebook she's left with this choice of either taking a risk with him or just moving past this and focusing on her studies instead. Because she is sensitive she might end up being hurt. Any questions?

I know that Tik, tubby, and scartooth do well at giving male and female perspectives on this.

You and your friend to me seem young too. He asked your friend out. She said no. He's allowed to talk to whoever he wants. If she's now interested, then go for it.

And as for the slutty types of girls as you called them. Is there proof of sex? I have friends of all types of men, and some of them would be bad for a girl. However they are just friends who can make me laugh when I see them. I hope you understand what I'm trying to say as I use myself as the example.

I simply say put it out there. If it fails, then nothing is lost. If he's willing to open up possibilities with your friend that's wonderful!!! Let's just not get ahead of ourselves. He asked her out, that's not a marriage proposal.

How do you know the slutty types were even his girlfriends? Just because you take pictures with people or they write on your wall doesn't make them your girlfriend. Aquarius can be just like every other guy in the area of dating solely on shallow reasons, especially at the college age, but we still like our mental stimulation and will only take those types seriously.

The question is how am I to assume that it's not about sex? If he's tried to pick up on her, how can she know he hasn't tired to pick up on other girls? Especially if these girls are...those types. 🙂

Look its college....NO PLACE FOR A RELATIONSHIP. And if he's the typical college age, he's gonna hit on whoever he wants. That guy to girl ratio in most universities is ridiculously skewed in a guys favor. Can you really blame them??

Yes, yes, its about sex. Why else do guys initially hit on girls?? If he tries to get to know you, maybe its about a little more. And depending on the way you carry yourself, then you may or may not end up in the used slut category. This goes for any man. There are some girls you date and there are those who are only good for one thing. A woman knows what category she fits into just by the way she carries herself. So she shouldn't sweat the "type" she claimed to see on his facebook. Facebook is not real life usually. I can't tell you how many people stage "fun, exciting" looking pictures just to post on fb.

It seems she's feeling insecure about matching up to the girls she thinks he wants....we smell fear from a mile away. SO if she still wants said boy she better man up and find her confidence quick or she will end up like the rest of those "sluts".

sounds like lady_m covered it. i think the only thing that matters here is your friend's fear. if she's afraid of getting hurt, then yes, focus on school. UGH! now i gotta say it...love is a battlefield



aqua men are peculiar. think leo just weirder. they're equally as arrogant, they just hide it better (than leo). where leo is flashy, aquas are more laid-back. the point is, both are wolves...the aqua's wearing sheeps clothing because they're just weird and mysterious like that 😛

so can this man break your friend's heart? yes. but any boy could do the same right? if i were your friend, i would be his friend. i would be less concerned about what little tart happens to catch his eye because at the end of the day, it's the good friend who's intriguing (and hot) that'll gain more traction in the long-run.

i'd focus on school, i'd still talk to dude, sit next to him in class from time to time, but ask him out?...no. aquas like puzzles. be a puzzle...hell, be a rubik's cube (remember those) and in a year or so, he might ask her out 😛

They seem to be talking a lot and in fact she got off the phone with him today and we were able to see him walking while we were on the phone with him and he seemed really into the conversation and was listening really closely to the phone. Then when he saw her he got off of his phone and gave her two hugs on in the beginning and one in the end. He seemed really into seeing her and just happy to talk to her. Then one of his friends came over and they all chatted for a while and he told her who that guy was, and how long they've been friends for. After the guy left he said he wanted to hang out with her when he has time but for now he has to go to a tutoring class and he would catch up with her later. He also said that if she needed any copies of the homework he would get them for her.

He was born on February 15TH.

Well one, we all have our "types' and a certain "image" that we're looking for. Some men may personally like the "slutty" type b/c they are in a period in their life when slutty girls will do. He may like this "slutty" image b/c like alot of guys who are not really looking for their next relationship, they their satisfaction from those slutty types of guys. And two, just b/c he perfers slutty girls persay doesn't mean that he can't have more than 1 type. He may like all kinds of different girls. He may like the slutty type AND the "take home to mama" type like your friend. Either way, looks can be deceiving. This other girl may look slutty but you all might be wrong about her just like you all were wrong about what kind of guy he was. If he's not looking for any type of intimate connections with anyone, some men don't necessarily need to go out seeking women that are "good" women. If you've seen his history on facebook & if you can clearly see that this guy may not necessarily be the best choice for a girl like your friend then take it for what it is & tell your friend to move on. After all, it's not like your friend & this guy have went on long voyages to the beach with eachother. They've only had a few conversations & a little bit of time to get to know eachother. So technically, if you're friend is going to stay around, she should b/c she wants to & b/c of that curiousity of finding out what he's all about with the hopes that she's not wrong about him. BUT, it all depends on her. Some people can briefly have a few conversations with someone else or look at their facebook page & immediately get a quick idea of what that other person is about. Some people use their intuition AND what they see on those sites & run like hell & some people actually don't & would prefer to stick around just for the curiousity of it all. He might be attracted sexually or intimately to the "slutty" type but that doesn't mean that he doesn't have any friends that are the opposite type. It would be diff. if this guy asked your friend to marry him, but he didn't so relax. At this point she can either stick around & be proven right or stick around and be proven wrong.

I'm not saying that she sees him as the all around sensitive type. Maybe she sees him that way and most girls do not but that doesn't mean he isn't.

Regardless Pink You and and Your Friend have made ridiculous assumptions about this guy based on his facebook page. The person we as individuals present to the world (i.e. FB) and the person we present to individual people are completely different.

Your friend was scared and she used facebook to solidify her fears as oppose to just giving the boy a chance and now she's back tracking when she sees he is moving forward.


She needs to get it together.

I agree. If you really like someone or if you are atleast interested in them for whatever reasons, the LEAST you can do is give them enough credit to SHOW themselves to you by way of revealing themselves to you through their actions. Sure, the past is sometimes irrelevant just like some rumors & he-said/she-said can be relevant & shed alot of light on who a person really is behind closed doors. BUT, if you're basis for learning about this guy are strictly based on what you find on his FB page, then you were already setting yourself up for disappointment. One, no matter what you see on someon'es FB page, you'll never know their connections or attachments with other people. We can guess all day long & try to make assumptions, that sometimes end up being correct BUT at the same time, someone's FB page does not disclose the full details of a person's character either. This guy might have 1 million "slutty" girls on his FB page, but that may not mean that he's attracted to them; hell it could mean that those kinds of girls are attracted to HIM, vs. things being the other way around. And hey I'm all for trying to find any source possible to find out the full extent of someone's character b/c after all, employers will often seek out future applicants on FB just to get a glimpse (keyword) of what kind of person they might offer a position in their company. BUT the keyword was GLIMPSE! It's all about moderation & being able to use all the reliable sources you have & being able to balance everything out. For example..yes while some employers will look up a person on FB to see their page before hiring them, they ALSO check out the person's personal resume & references TOO. And I mean I get it, some people go all out on their FB pages & display their whole lives to the world BUT regardless of whether you see good or bad on their page, strictly using a social networking site as a way to fully get the extent of someone's personality & character is not good enough & it's the passive-aggressive way to date. If you keep getting to know him through his FB page, everything you like or don't like will always be just an assumption..and I say that b/c actions speak alot louder than any words someone can copy & paste onto an online profile. The best source for who he REALLY is & for who he REALLY likes is through getting to know him up close & personal & in person.

renee, scartooth and lady M are all right, especially about the "stalking out his past" and the "fear." definitely. thanks!