butterflyy
@butterflyy
15 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 3 · Topics: 2
Aqua guys don't like to INITIATE things??
Well 1st off understand that the average Aqua doesn't dive head first into any situation, even if they have a slight crush on someone. He keeps viewing your profile (which is a GOOD thing) b/c he's still scoping you out & possibly trying to figure out if he's really digging you or not. You don't know him that well yet so there could be a million things going through his mind. Perhaps he's new to online dating & wants to be more cautious about things moreso than someone whose been a member of that site for a long time. And hey, maybe it's true that he's a little shy.
my questions:
1) why hasnt he called me yet— it's just text between us
-Well you need to have that convo with him. There could be 1 million reasons why he hasn't called you. You admitted yourself that this guy had problems initiating contact on the computer, so if this guy really IS as shy as you think he is, understand that this same "shyness" about him will come out in regards to speaking to you on the phone. You need to tell him for your OWN sake that you're not really interested in establishing a connection with someone through means of text message. Just be honest about it. Alot of people would prefer to hear that person's voice, especially if they've already exchanged phone numbers. The only reasons some guys never call is b/c they're either too shy to go "1st" or they're already taken. I hope he's not one of those "liars" whose just experimenting with online dating/already taken b/c if he is, that'll explain why he's trying to keep as much distance as possible.
3) is he interested romantically or he just wants me as a friend?
-Only time will tell. You should be upfront with this guy & tell him that you'd prefer more intimate contact, & especially since you 2 have't met yet. That's a reasonable & valid request. Maybe this guy really is shy. Aquas tend to take things slow b/c they are naturally very cautious & sometimes even suspicious individuals. Don't expect up front for this guy to have butterflies about you; after all, he hasn't even heard your voice yet, so to an extent you can't really expect for him to be head over heels for you already anyways. And even if he was, pst! He's an Aqua..they don't reveal their true feelings about another person until later on when they are "for sure" anyways.
my questions:
1) why hasnt he called me yet— it's just text between us
-Well you need to have that convo with him. There could be 1 million reasons why he hasn't called you. You admitted yourself that this guy had problems initiating contact on the computer, so if this guy really IS as shy as you think he is, understand that this same "shyness" about him will come out in regards to speaking to you on the phone. You need to tell him for your OWN sake that you're not really interested in establishing a connection with someone through means of text message. Just be honest about it. Alot of people would prefer to hear that person's voice, especially if they've already exchanged phone numbers. The only reasons some guys never call is b/c they're either too shy to go "1st" or they're already taken. I hope he's not one of those "liars" whose just experimenting with online dating/already taken b/c if he is, that'll explain why he's trying to keep as much distance as possible.
3) is he interested romantically or he just wants me as a friend?
-Only time will tell. You should be upfront with this guy & tell him that you'd prefer more intimate contact, & especially since you 2 have't met yet. That's a reasonable & valid request. Maybe this guy really is shy. Aquas tend to take things slow b/c they are naturally very cautious & sometimes even suspicious individuals. Don't expect up front for this guy to have butterflies about you; after all, he hasn't even heard your voice yet, so to an extent you can't really expect for him to be head over heels for you already anyways. And even if he was, pst! He's an Aqua..they don't reveal their true feelings about another person until later on when they are "for sure" anyways.
As an aqua guy some of that stuff sounds familiar. Krysrenee7's first paragraph is right on.
I'll give a try at those questions.
"my questions:
1) why hasnt he called me yet— it's just text between us
2) why didn't he sms me when he has my number(contact directly)...instead of sending offline message on messenger?"
Aquarian time is different than normal time, an aqua day is about a week.
"3) is he interested romantically or he just wants me as a friend?"
Probably wants to be friends to figure out if he wants to get romantically involved, but not as a long term friend.
"4) is he shy and afraid of rejection—? he viewed my profile again and again, and waited for me to message 1ST. he waited till I sms first. he waited till I ask him out first."
Might be shy but rejection isn't what he's afraid of, just the opposite. Dating just doesn't seem natural, do you know what I mean? It's like if you're dating you're already a couple, it's almost like a commitment although I know that's not how it is but that is how it feels. That's why we like doing things platonically at first. The way I like to meet girls is from hanging out in the same group, that way I can watch how she acts with other people and what she casually talks about. Then you really know what a person's about, on a date people always have to put up a kind of a front, sort of like playing a role so it's hard to know what someone's really like.
I'll give a try at those questions.
"my questions:
1) why hasnt he called me yet— it's just text between us
2) why didn't he sms me when he has my number(contact directly)...instead of sending offline message on messenger?"
Aquarian time is different than normal time, an aqua day is about a week.
"3) is he interested romantically or he just wants me as a friend?"
Probably wants to be friends to figure out if he wants to get romantically involved, but not as a long term friend.
"4) is he shy and afraid of rejection—? he viewed my profile again and again, and waited for me to message 1ST. he waited till I sms first. he waited till I ask him out first."
Might be shy but rejection isn't what he's afraid of, just the opposite. Dating just doesn't seem natural, do you know what I mean? It's like if you're dating you're already a couple, it's almost like a commitment although I know that's not how it is but that is how it feels. That's why we like doing things platonically at first. The way I like to meet girls is from hanging out in the same group, that way I can watch how she acts with other people and what she casually talks about. Then you really know what a person's about, on a date people always have to put up a kind of a front, sort of like playing a role so it's hard to know what someone's really like.
@Starstream...I completely agree. That's why Aquas value & seek friendship 1st. There's a difference sometimes in a person when they're on a date trying to impress someone vs. hanging out with someone whose just a "friend." When you label that person as just a friend, people tend to relax more. They are more comfortable being in their own element & with being their true selves. There's nothing wrong with trying to impress someone and/or get someone to see the best qualities w/in you but often times people put SO much energy into doing this that it almost seems as if doing so is a way to hide the negative side or flaws within them.
And Aquas understand this, that's why they strive for friendship 1st. It's not that they're not dedicated to eventually turning the friendship into a relationship, no but moreso that they don't see the harm in "taking things slow." Aquas feel more comfortable & more trusting of others when they can sense that the other person is relaxed & is most likely to be their true selves. They don't care about all the make up, artifical stuff & fake laughs at non-funny jokes. They like getting to the NITTY-GRITTY of a person b/c ultimately that's what matters. And for Aquas, actually establishing platonic friendships with people gets the job done every time.
Sure, sometimes an Aqua may never want to go past the friendship line, but it's not b/c they're too afraid of anything more than that. No, if they decide to remain just friends it's either b/c 1. They're not done "scoping" you out yet OR 2. They've already seen some traits/qualities within you that they don't want to put up with. Either way, them remaining friends with someone gives them the option to leave/run like hell just in case they see something now that they didn't see previously. IT's a helluva lot easier to run like hell when you're just friends than it is to untangle yourself from a long-term relationship. And for this reasons, Aquas tend to "wait it out" for as long as possible
And Aquas understand this, that's why they strive for friendship 1st. It's not that they're not dedicated to eventually turning the friendship into a relationship, no but moreso that they don't see the harm in "taking things slow." Aquas feel more comfortable & more trusting of others when they can sense that the other person is relaxed & is most likely to be their true selves. They don't care about all the make up, artifical stuff & fake laughs at non-funny jokes. They like getting to the NITTY-GRITTY of a person b/c ultimately that's what matters. And for Aquas, actually establishing platonic friendships with people gets the job done every time.
Sure, sometimes an Aqua may never want to go past the friendship line, but it's not b/c they're too afraid of anything more than that. No, if they decide to remain just friends it's either b/c 1. They're not done "scoping" you out yet OR 2. They've already seen some traits/qualities within you that they don't want to put up with. Either way, them remaining friends with someone gives them the option to leave/run like hell just in case they see something now that they didn't see previously. IT's a helluva lot easier to run like hell when you're just friends than it is to untangle yourself from a long-term relationship. And for this reasons, Aquas tend to "wait it out" for as long as possible
@Domino..um...what an odd question. How exactly did you want me to answer that question? Does it really matter?! And is that really important considering how I start my paragraphs have absolutely nothing to do with the content of what I'm saying?
@Val...I agree. Sometimes Aquas can take the "friendship 1st" thing a little too far. Sometimes they drag the friendship thing out long after it's time, so much so that they can actually turn off or ruin what they were trying to build with good intentions. Perhaps, the other placements in your chart can explain why you do things a little differently in the friendship category as well.
With an Aqua sun, Cancer moon & Pisces rising, I tend to dive right into romance as well. However, I can sometimes see the Aqua in me coming out when I 1st meet someone that I'm sure about. If I even slightly kinda like them, I'll take things a little slow. BUT, if I feel an immediate/instant connection with that person, I don't mind "speeding" things up a notch, if anything just out of me feeling excited & wanting to naturally be impulsive & step outside of my box (the way I usually am). I think it all depends on how much I'm really digging another person.
If I go into a situation assuming me & another person are dating, but yet start to realize that the connection I was seeking isn't seeming to happen fast enough, I'll slow myself down & prepare myself for the lonnng process of "just friendship." And I'll do this with the mindset of: "Hey, if we make it past friendship, good for us; but if not, oh well atleast I'll hopefully still have a good friend that came from it all." It's easier for Aquas not to emotionally invest in anyone they've trained themselves to see as only friends. And since Aquas can sometimes fear anything involving the giving of their extreme emotions to others, friendship does the trick just perfectly. Almost like it "protects" us. As the saying goes, "You can't miss what you never had."
If we never allow ourselves to get emotionally attached to someone, losing that person even as a friend won't hurt as much. Depending on an Aqua's baggage/past, some are just fine with platonic friendships
@Val...I agree. Sometimes Aquas can take the "friendship 1st" thing a little too far. Sometimes they drag the friendship thing out long after it's time, so much so that they can actually turn off or ruin what they were trying to build with good intentions. Perhaps, the other placements in your chart can explain why you do things a little differently in the friendship category as well.
With an Aqua sun, Cancer moon & Pisces rising, I tend to dive right into romance as well. However, I can sometimes see the Aqua in me coming out when I 1st meet someone that I'm sure about. If I even slightly kinda like them, I'll take things a little slow. BUT, if I feel an immediate/instant connection with that person, I don't mind "speeding" things up a notch, if anything just out of me feeling excited & wanting to naturally be impulsive & step outside of my box (the way I usually am). I think it all depends on how much I'm really digging another person.
If I go into a situation assuming me & another person are dating, but yet start to realize that the connection I was seeking isn't seeming to happen fast enough, I'll slow myself down & prepare myself for the lonnng process of "just friendship." And I'll do this with the mindset of: "Hey, if we make it past friendship, good for us; but if not, oh well atleast I'll hopefully still have a good friend that came from it all." It's easier for Aquas not to emotionally invest in anyone they've trained themselves to see as only friends. And since Aquas can sometimes fear anything involving the giving of their extreme emotions to others, friendship does the trick just perfectly. Almost like it "protects" us. As the saying goes, "You can't miss what you never had."
If we never allow ourselves to get emotionally attached to someone, losing that person even as a friend won't hurt as much. Depending on an Aqua's baggage/past, some are just fine with platonic friendships
Aqua guys don't like to INITIATE things??
If by things, you mean actions, no not really, they may not initiate. They are not cardinal or mutable signs.
They will like to think through/juggle lots of details before finaaaaaaaaallllllly acting.
But they can initiate conversations to no end 😛
If by things, you mean actions, no not really, they may not initiate. They are not cardinal or mutable signs.
They will like to think through/juggle lots of details before finaaaaaaaaallllllly acting.
But they can initiate conversations to no end 😛
Posted by zenalchemy
Aqua guys don't like to INITIATE things??
If by things, you mean actions, no not really, they may not initiate. They are not cardinal or mutable signs.
They will like to think through/juggle lots of details before finaaaaaaaaallllllly acting.
But they can initiate conversations to no end 😛
Hey you! Wanna talk?
^ lol... fixed sign thing's just generic POV.
i use mutable and cardinal sign things too 😛
I've known plenty of people in fixed signs that initiate and take action.
Of course they do, eventually. who doesn't? Has to be thought out before is all I'm saying... i.e. will they always be the first to jump head 1st into things like Aries and Sag, I doubt it (unless the Aqua has a healthy fire or gemini in their chart).
Read Krys 1st post, you'll see it in action from an Aqua.
Mind you, we are talking about emotional relationship matters... may not hold true for intiating conversations, business deals, etc... have to study that in more detail.
i use mutable and cardinal sign things too 😛
I've known plenty of people in fixed signs that initiate and take action.
Of course they do, eventually. who doesn't? Has to be thought out before is all I'm saying... i.e. will they always be the first to jump head 1st into things like Aries and Sag, I doubt it (unless the Aqua has a healthy fire or gemini in their chart).
Read Krys 1st post, you'll see it in action from an Aqua.
Mind you, we are talking about emotional relationship matters... may not hold true for intiating conversations, business deals, etc... have to study that in more detail.
Got the rising/moon fire and a few in my chart
Aaahh, fiery feisty aqua 😉
Aaahh, fiery feisty aqua 😉
^ hell yea ... w000t!
yea what burn? *whistling*
This guy was scoping you on a dating site, therefore a date (where you could see if there's a possibility for a friendship) isn't a completely insane suggestion. He may be married or in a relationship as a lot of scopers on these sites tend to be. Let this guy make the next move. Don't waste a minute more thinking about him. Just pay attention to men who are secure, happy and open to a relationship/friendship without playing games with your head.
Never sweat the dudes.
Never sweat the dudes.
It's our dual Saturn / Uranus coming through. As much as Aquarius is a sign of independence and wackiness, there is a very large conservative streak in us. By conservative I mean that we don't take risks lighly and we like to have some form of security before we do take that risk, that's why you might find a lot of Aquarius who won't initiate things. We're most likely scoping and observing, analyzing the risks involved and how far we're willing to go with this. It takes us time to decide to go through with something that we're not sure about.
It personally took me a whole year to respond to one woman who was flirting with me because I wasn't sure about the whole situation, her seriousness, and so on. I finally had to just take the dive when I felt the risk was worth it.
Also, about him not asking you out. Once again, this comes through as a Saturn influenced behavior. He was still scoping you out, finding out your interests and seeing where you come from. He most likely didn't ask you because he wasn't sure if you wanted to go see the movies with him yet and didn't want to rock the boat. When you asked him if he wanted to see the movies, it "opened the flood-gates" so to speak and realized he could take that risk. Same thing for trading your numbers.
>Why hasn't he called me yet?
I know as an Aquarius, I can't stand talking on the phone. I will literally try to weasel my way out of talking on the phone to anyone as much as I can. I just don't feel comfortable talking on the phone. I like the freedom that text and SMS gives, I can think about my responses without someone on the line waiting and waiting for me to talk and I can be more thoughtful in them. I feel rushed when I'm on the phone to respond.
>why didn't he sms me when he has my number(contact directly)...instead of sending offline message on messenger?
I don't know this one. Perhaps he's simply been busy, I see no real reason why he'd wait until you're offline to send a message.
>is he interested romantically or he just wants me as a friend?
Trick question, being a friend and being a lover aren't separate to us..well, we can have platonic friends, but we always want our lover to be our friend too. He sounds like he is interested in you more than just a friend, to me.
>Most of the Aquas I know and myself are indeed shy and afraid of rejection, we might hide it well, but every single one I know and myself feel this way. That's why we can be cautious.
It personally took me a whole year to respond to one woman who was flirting with me because I wasn't sure about the whole situation, her seriousness, and so on. I finally had to just take the dive when I felt the risk was worth it.
Also, about him not asking you out. Once again, this comes through as a Saturn influenced behavior. He was still scoping you out, finding out your interests and seeing where you come from. He most likely didn't ask you because he wasn't sure if you wanted to go see the movies with him yet and didn't want to rock the boat. When you asked him if he wanted to see the movies, it "opened the flood-gates" so to speak and realized he could take that risk. Same thing for trading your numbers.
>Why hasn't he called me yet?
I know as an Aquarius, I can't stand talking on the phone. I will literally try to weasel my way out of talking on the phone to anyone as much as I can. I just don't feel comfortable talking on the phone. I like the freedom that text and SMS gives, I can think about my responses without someone on the line waiting and waiting for me to talk and I can be more thoughtful in them. I feel rushed when I'm on the phone to respond.
>why didn't he sms me when he has my number(contact directly)...instead of sending offline message on messenger?
I don't know this one. Perhaps he's simply been busy, I see no real reason why he'd wait until you're offline to send a message.
>is he interested romantically or he just wants me as a friend?
Trick question, being a friend and being a lover aren't separate to us..well, we can have platonic friends, but we always want our lover to be our friend too. He sounds like he is interested in you more than just a friend, to me.
>Most of the Aquas I know and myself are indeed shy and afraid of rejection, we might hide it well, but every single one I know and myself feel this way. That's why we can be cautious.
I wish I could edit posts.
I mean when you started implying he should ask you out, he got the idea and figure he could take the risk.
I mean when you started implying he should ask you out, he got the idea and figure he could take the risk.
Posted by valeria25
Hmmm I dunno. The ones I knew pursued relentlessly, but I think that has to do with my very friendly and happy personality. Ugh. 😢 I love my personality and myself but damn, it gets me in trouble at times, that's why I have to be really cautious now. I dont like caution. I like to just be spontaneous and happy but everything comes with a price. And i dont want to hurt anyone so i'm always up front! So honestly I think it depends. With who they're dealing with,ect.
That could be it. There's been some women in my life who gave off a very safe and welcoming vibe, which made it much easier for me to approach and make a move on them. I just felt immediately comfortable with them and felt I didn't have to worry about anything.
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-- we started chatting..he was the one who initiated contact when I was online. he likes watching movies. didn't ask me out. so one day I sent an offline message, said something to make it like it's his idea to ask me out. "lets hang out" next chat he asked if I was free. He said he was thinking of asking me out for movie and dinner. I said sounds nice.
He didn't ask me for my number. So I asked if he wanted to exchange numbers. He said sure.
-- I couldn't meet him that week. So did he. he said "i wish to see u tomorrow..but I had to fix.. t'row"
following weekend..I sms him and said I went for a movie and wanted to ask him...but didn't keep his number. he was acting cute and funny and said " 😢 next time tell me after the movie babe heh jk. I was watching football but not really interested in it" and said next time he'll call me if I dont mind..I said sure. last weekend, he sent message on messenger when I was offline and ask "u there?" why didnt he sms my hp?then we chatted the following day. we planned to watch movie on saturday..I told him to confirm on friday. he said "i'll book and confirm earlier =) "
my questions:
1) why hasnt he called me yet— it's just text between us
2) why didn't he sms me when he has my number(contact directly)...instead of sending offline message on messenger?
3) is he interested romantically or he just wants me as a friend?
4) is he shy and afraid of rejection—? he viewed my profile again and again, and waited for me to message 1ST. he waited till I sms first. he waited till I ask him out first.
5)I asked if it's ok to postpone the movie this sat to next week cos have to travel for work. and said if he wants to watch that movie with someone else this weekend it's fine..we can pick other movie next week. he said "its ok..I will not go to movie then. thanks for informing =)"
do they not like to initiate things? or he's not really interested...
and I don't know if he really wants to see me or...just wants a company to catch movies...since he likes going for movies.
hope to hear from u guys