TrulyCancer
@TrulyCancer
9 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 14 · Topics: 1
Aquarius man sudden silence
You want him to be more than a friend or not?
Actually I do.. But i would like to get to know him better and enjoy the friendship as it is now
How do I act now? Try talking to him like usual or ignore him?
if things do not go the easy way, you have two choices: 1) telling yourself it was not meant for me, 2) counting on a long on-off challenge with maybe success at the end of the tunnel.
I watched a movie yesterday and it was about the latter. but movies are to filling the blancs of the reality. often.
I watched a movie yesterday and it was about the latter. but movies are to filling the blancs of the reality. often.
Thanks for your comforting or should i say supportive words, @DwellingonMove
Are you aqua yourself?
Actually me being persistent I would opt for no2. And would settle for no1 when I reach my limits. I guess I will just wait.. Aquas are just so hard to read.
Btw what movie was it that you watched?
Are you aqua yourself?
Actually me being persistent I would opt for no2. And would settle for no1 when I reach my limits. I guess I will just wait.. Aquas are just so hard to read.
Btw what movie was it that you watched?
Posted by TrulyCancerno, not Aqua. Sag Stellium.
Thanks for your comforting or should i say supportive words, @DwellingonMove
Are you aqua yourself?
Actually me being persistent I would opt for no2. And would settle for no1 when I reach my limits. I guess I will just wait.. Aquas are just so hard to read.
Btw what movie was it that you watched?
it's ok, that you expressed your choice.
I just did/would not want to encourage you to do the on-off stuff. just wanted to clarify.
to me love should not be a challenge if it's not the circumstances. life is waiting for us with lots of other hardships. we should not weaken ourselves with pseudo challenges.
the movie is a european one. not on the us market I think.
but hollowood have enough such movies.
Probably one of the best dating advice I ever read:
MC: How does being chased make men feel?
EC: I understand the chase can feel like a sincere and genuine pursuit of love. I know all sorts of chasers who say, "I just want him to love me! This is so unfair; I can't believe men are like this." Meanwhile, from the guy's perspective, she transforms from the fun-loving, easy-to-be-around woman into Gollum from "The Lord of the Rings." I'll tie it all up: When people chase, they drain the color and joy from their lives. They suffocate happiness in pursuit of a fictitious happiness they think lies in the future, outside of themselves. As a result, they are hollow and starving for connection and relief.
MC: But what if you do get what you were chasing?
EC: The temporary sugar-high isn't pure, true happiness. When you think things are going right you're filled with joy, and it's not from the experience itself. All those positive feelings are actually a very obvious feeling in disguise: tremendous (but temporary) relief.
MC: Does the "thrill of the chase" apply to women the same way it does to men?
EC: It's a totally flawed idea. Men don't love the chase. "The chase" is typically a woman withholding parts of herself from the guy – as if somehow being inauthentic will lead to a good relationship. Men want to be around women who are happy and fun. It really is that simple. We don't think about relationships as something to plan and analyze, and we don't believe a relationship means anything about us as people. Instead, men pay attention to one thing: Does this feel good right now? If he feels good in the moments he's with you, he's going to want to be around you more. If being around you doesn't feel good, he's going to want to be around you less.
MC: Just telling yourself you're doing it wrong isn't enough. What advice do you have to change "chasing" behavior?
EC: All you have to do is realize your happiness is the most important factor in reaching his heart. Once you realize that, all the nonsense, drama, and fantasies fall away because they simply don't work. If we're talking about men and long-term relationships, I can tell you on behalf of all men: We want to be with a woman who brings happiness to the table instead of looking to the outside world to make her happy.
MC: How does being chased make men feel?
EC: I understand the chase can feel like a sincere and genuine pursuit of love. I know all sorts of chasers who say, "I just want him to love me! This is so unfair; I can't believe men are like this." Meanwhile, from the guy's perspective, she transforms from the fun-loving, easy-to-be-around woman into Gollum from "The Lord of the Rings." I'll tie it all up: When people chase, they drain the color and joy from their lives. They suffocate happiness in pursuit of a fictitious happiness they think lies in the future, outside of themselves. As a result, they are hollow and starving for connection and relief.
MC: But what if you do get what you were chasing?
EC: The temporary sugar-high isn't pure, true happiness. When you think things are going right you're filled with joy, and it's not from the experience itself. All those positive feelings are actually a very obvious feeling in disguise: tremendous (but temporary) relief.
MC: Does the "thrill of the chase" apply to women the same way it does to men?
EC: It's a totally flawed idea. Men don't love the chase. "The chase" is typically a woman withholding parts of herself from the guy – as if somehow being inauthentic will lead to a good relationship. Men want to be around women who are happy and fun. It really is that simple. We don't think about relationships as something to plan and analyze, and we don't believe a relationship means anything about us as people. Instead, men pay attention to one thing: Does this feel good right now? If he feels good in the moments he's with you, he's going to want to be around you more. If being around you doesn't feel good, he's going to want to be around you less.
MC: Just telling yourself you're doing it wrong isn't enough. What advice do you have to change "chasing" behavior?
EC: All you have to do is realize your happiness is the most important factor in reaching his heart. Once you realize that, all the nonsense, drama, and fantasies fall away because they simply don't work. If we're talking about men and long-term relationships, I can tell you on behalf of all men: We want to be with a woman who brings happiness to the table instead of looking to the outside world to make her happy.
Posted by DwellingOnMovePosted by TrulyCancerno, not Aqua. Sag Stellium.
Thanks for your comforting or should i say supportive words, @DwellingonMove
Are you aqua yourself?
Actually me being persistent I would opt for no2. And would settle for no1 when I reach my limits. I guess I will just wait.. Aquas are just so hard to read.
Btw what movie was it that you watched?
it's ok, that you expressed your choice.
I just did/would not want to encourage you to do the on-off stuff. just wanted to clarify.
to me love should not be a challenge if it's not the circumstances. life is waiting for us with lots of other hardships. we should not weaken ourselves with pseudo challenges.
the movie is a european one. not on the us market I think.
but hollowood have enough such movies.click to expand
Thanks again @DwellingonMove
Such powerful words I must remember them -
1. life is waiting for us with lots of other hardships
2. We should not weaken ourselves with pseudo challenges
ah you're so kind to me.
@Undine
Thanks. One of the best dating advice indeed!!
I don't wanna be looked at as Gollum!!!
The advice is telling as if we women should not pursue men.. But it is so hard when a man starts giving you hope and then leaves for no reasons..?
I guess I have tried hard not to be so pushy in chasing him.. And not even asked why he has suddenly stopped talking... Well he could probably feel the "sadness" in me...
Thanks. One of the best dating advice indeed!!
I don't wanna be looked at as Gollum!!!
The advice is telling as if we women should not pursue men.. But it is so hard when a man starts giving you hope and then leaves for no reasons..?
I guess I have tried hard not to be so pushy in chasing him.. And not even asked why he has suddenly stopped talking... Well he could probably feel the "sadness" in me...
Posted by UndineWhat's the advice?
Probably one of the best dating advice I ever read:
MC: How does being chased make men feel?
EC: I understand the chase can feel like a sincere and genuine pursuit of love. I know all sorts of chasers who say, "I just want him to love me! This is so unfair; I can't believe men are like this." Meanwhile, from the guy's perspective, she transforms from the fun-loving, easy-to-be-around woman into Gollum from "The Lord of the Rings." I'll tie it all up: When people chase, they drain the color and joy from their lives. They suffocate happiness in pursuit of a fictitious happiness they think lies in the future, outside of themselves. As a result, they are hollow and starving for connection and relief.
MC: But what if you do get what you were chasing?
EC: The temporary sugar-high isn't pure, true happiness. When you think things are going right you're filled with joy, and it's not from the experience itself. All those positive feelings are actually a very obvious feeling in disguise: tremendous (but temporary) relief.
MC: Does the "thrill of the chase" apply to women the same way it does to men?
EC: It's a totally flawed idea. Men don't love the chase. "The chase" is typically a woman withholding parts of herself from the guy – as if somehow being inauthentic will lead to a good relationship. Men want to be around women who are happy and fun. It really is that simple. We don't think about relationships as something to plan and analyze, and we don't believe a relationship means anything about us as people. Instead, men pay attention to one thing: Does this feel good right now? If he feels good in the moments he's with you, he's going to want to be around you more. If being around you doesn't feel good, he's going to want to be around you less.
MC: Just telling yourself you're doing it wrong isn't enough. What advice do you have to change "chasing" behavior?
EC: All you have to do is realize your happiness is the most important factor in reaching his heart. Once you realize that, all the nonsense, drama, and fantasies fall away because they simply don't work. If we're talking about men and long-term relationships, I can tell you on behalf of all men: We want to be with a woman who brings happiness to the table instead of looking to the outside world to make her happy.
Posted by TheSagDon't chase after anyone!Posted by UndineWhat's the advice?
Probably one of the best dating advice I ever read:
MC: How does being chased make men feel?
EC: I understand the chase can feel like a sincere and genuine pursuit of love. I know all sorts of chasers who say, "I just want him to love me! This is so unfair; I can't believe men are like this." Meanwhile, from the guy's perspective, she transforms from the fun-loving, easy-to-be-around woman into Gollum from "The Lord of the Rings." I'll tie it all up: When people chase, they drain the color and joy from their lives. They suffocate happiness in pursuit of a fictitious happiness they think lies in the future, outside of themselves. As a result, they are hollow and starving for connection and relief.
MC: But what if you do get what you were chasing?
EC: The temporary sugar-high isn't pure, true happiness. When you think things are going right you're filled with joy, and it's not from the experience itself. All those positive feelings are actually a very obvious feeling in disguise: tremendous (but temporary) relief.
MC: Does the "thrill of the chase" apply to women the same way it does to men?
EC: It's a totally flawed idea. Men don't love the chase. "The chase" is typically a woman withholding parts of herself from the guy – as if somehow being inauthentic will lead to a good relationship. Men want to be around women who are happy and fun. It really is that simple. We don't think about relationships as something to plan and analyze, and we don't believe a relationship means anything about us as people. Instead, men pay attention to one thing: Does this feel good right now? If he feels good in the moments he's with you, he's going to want to be around you more. If being around you doesn't feel good, he's going to want to be around you less.
MC: Just telling yourself you're doing it wrong isn't enough. What advice do you have to change "chasing" behavior?
EC: All you have to do is realize your happiness is the most important factor in reaching his heart. Once you realize that, all the nonsense, drama, and fantasies fall away because they simply don't work. If we're talking about men and long-term relationships, I can tell you on behalf of all men: We want to be with a woman who brings happiness to the table instead of looking to the outside world to make her happy.
click to expand
As long as you two are not in a committed relationship, you are just one of his many options, and so is he/she to you. We cannot force anyone to choose us.
Posted by UndineI partly agree. But I believe it's way better if the woman "chases" the man. Usually men who chase hard often come off as needy and insecure with no options. Women don't like that so they reject them. But men can deal better with women who text them a lot or call them because men know women need to communicate and build trust etc. As a man I like it when women chase me, because it shows me they care and that's how they communicate it. All of my male friends who are married get called on the phone multiple times by their wives on a daily without getting annoyed because they know women do that.Posted by TheSagDon't chase after anyone!Posted by UndineWhat's the advice?
Probably one of the best dating advice I ever read:
MC: How does being chased make men feel?
EC: I understand the chase can feel like a sincere and genuine pursuit of love. I know all sorts of chasers who say, "I just want him to love me! This is so unfair; I can't believe men are like this." Meanwhile, from the guy's perspective, she transforms from the fun-loving, easy-to-be-around woman into Gollum from "The Lord of the Rings." I'll tie it all up: When people chase, they drain the color and joy from their lives. They suffocate happiness in pursuit of a fictitious happiness they think lies in the future, outside of themselves. As a result, they are hollow and starving for connection and relief.
MC: But what if you do get what you were chasing?
EC: The temporary sugar-high isn't pure, true happiness. When you think things are going right you're filled with joy, and it's not from the experience itself. All those positive feelings are actually a very obvious feeling in disguise: tremendous (but temporary) relief.
MC: Does the "thrill of the chase" apply to women the same way it does to men?
EC: It's a totally flawed idea. Men don't love the chase. "The chase" is typically a woman withholding parts of herself from the guy – as if somehow being inauthentic will lead to a good relationship. Men want to be around women who are happy and fun. It really is that simple. We don't think about relationships as something to plan and analyze, and we don't believe a relationship means anything about us as people. Instead, men pay attention to one thing: Does this feel good right now? If he feels good in the moments he's with you, he's going to want to be around you more. If being around you doesn't feel good, he's going to want to be around you less.
MC: Just telling yourself you're doing it wrong isn't enough. What advice do you have to change "chasing" behavior?
EC: All you have to do is realize your happiness is the most important factor in reaching his heart. Once you realize that, all the nonsense, drama, and fantasies fall away because they simply don't work. If we're talking about men and long-term relationships, I can tell you on behalf of all men: We want to be with a woman who brings happiness to the table instead of looking to the outside world to make her happy.
As long as you two are not in a committed relationship, you are just one of his many options, and so is he/she to you. We cannot force anyone to choose us.click to expand
So he's a player and you can't see the signs other then he's a Aquarius? So you believe the make believe before the reality. Case close then you have all the evidence a good detective needs to piece together a jigsaw puzzle of a calamity. Yet not only do you still pounder what's down yonder you blindly sabotage yourself. You set your self up for disappointment and you welcome it knowingly.
You miss who? You should be asking yourself does he miss me?
His action is the only sign you need to know.
You miss who? You should be asking yourself does he miss me?
His action is the only sign you need to know.
Posted by TheSagPosted by UndinePosted by TheSagDo they care, or are they just some controlling monsters? Or bored time wasters? "Honey, I just got out of the car and put my left foot in front of the left?"; "Toilet paper finished, goodbye old sock", "Just call you to remind to do whatever you do every week about this time, cause I consider you an idiot?"Posted by UndineI partly agree. But I believe it's way better if the woman "chases" the man. Usually men who chase hard often come off as needy and insecure with no options. Women don't like that so they reject them. But men can deal better with women who text them a lot or call them because men know women need to communicate and build trust etc. As a man I like it when women chase me, because it shows me they care and that's how they communicate it. All of my male friends who are married get called on the phone multiple times by their wives on a daily without getting annoyed because they know women do that.
Probably one of the best dating advice I ever read:
Don't chase after anyone!
As long as you two are not in a committed relationship, you are just one of his many options, and so is he/she to you. We cannot force anyone to choose us.click to expand
Unless it's some cool banter and flirting, I would find it completely annoying!
Oh, and nobody is a player just because they do not want to date someone (anymore).
When to stop dating:
0 months: you went on a date and dislike each other
1-6 months: you like each other, but there is no spark and the initial interest is dying out
6-12 months: getting to know each other better revealed some serious deal breakers
12-24 months: after the intense love phase has cooled down, the relationship feels restrictive or boring or we changed our mind and want different things now.
When to stop dating:
0 months: you went on a date and dislike each other
1-6 months: you like each other, but there is no spark and the initial interest is dying out
6-12 months: getting to know each other better revealed some serious deal breakers
12-24 months: after the intense love phase has cooled down, the relationship feels restrictive or boring or we changed our mind and want different things now.
I have been so disturbed still.. I can't take this without explanation.. Would any aqua man tell me if it is wise for me to get clarification of why his sudden withdrawal? That way it would be easier for me to accept.... ?
Trust your gut feeling. If he's with someone else then don't invest your time waiting for him. There's plenty of fish in the sea.
If he disappeared on you, just let him go....
If he disappeared on you, just let him go....
Thanks @Mike79
I can't really tell if he's with someone else now. I can still get him to talk to me but just very very briefly.. It was different before.. I just would like to know why the change.. *sigh*
I can't really tell if he's with someone else now. I can still get him to talk to me but just very very briefly.. It was different before.. I just would like to know why the change.. *sigh*
The sudden withdrawal is the answer. Does he need to sky write it?
It's not you. And even if it is so what, he's not the only man on the planet. When a person rejects you then you have the capability to reject them back by not owning the rejection and moving on.
Sitting around spending your precious moments thinking about a guy who is essentially gone is a total waste of life and time. You end up blaming yourself, bringing yourself down inside and that energy carries out and can effect how you feel about yourself which can effect your dating life.
Hes gone....NEXT!!
It's not you. And even if it is so what, he's not the only man on the planet. When a person rejects you then you have the capability to reject them back by not owning the rejection and moving on.
Sitting around spending your precious moments thinking about a guy who is essentially gone is a total waste of life and time. You end up blaming yourself, bringing yourself down inside and that energy carries out and can effect how you feel about yourself which can effect your dating life.
Hes gone....NEXT!!
The only reason we hold on to people that make us feel sad
Is because they were once the reason we felt happy.
You have to start with you.
Is because they were once the reason we felt happy.
You have to start with you.
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