How can I talk to my good Aqurius friend?

One of my closest friends is an Aquarius and I really love her. She makes me laugh tons and we have mind sets that are incredibly similar; and she is so unique which I love about her. But sometimes she can be a real bitch. And I need to find away to talk to her about it because it's driving me crazy. I really like her but the way she acts sometimes is a little ridiculous; and I just don't understand it.

She just acts like she is the center of the world; it's either her way or the highway. Like if I ask her if we can hang out, she'll be like okay but only if we hang out at her house in exactly twenty minutes and watch her favorite movie for the hundredth time. And I'm like, okay but I can't be there in twenty can I come over in an hour, and she'll be like forget the whole thing! And I can't even dare to ask if we can hang out at my house or do something I want to do.

What really bugged me was yesterday a few friends, her, and I were hanging out at my house to watch a movie, that we were going to buy on the tv (you, know, on demand) we go through the list of movies that are on and everyone really wants to see one film. And then she sees one of her favorite movies all time (that's she has already seen) and really wants to watch it. But no one else really wants to see it and none of us have seen the other film. So I'm like, well can we record it and watch it later, and watch the film everyone else here wants to see first, and then watch it later. And she turned into such a pouty bitch. It wasn't even like I said no, I just said we would do it in a different way so that everyone could be happy and not just her. She said it was unfair and while everyone else was laughing, enjoying, and chatting during the movie, she sat there cross armed with a scowl and sighed really loudly every two minutes, making it real obvious she was unhappy. It drove me crazy. I can't stand it when she acts like this.



The other thing she does, that really bugs me, is she gets really angry at me when I laugh at her. Like if she does or says something stupid, and I laugh (and that's just my personality, I laugh about everything) she'll turn back into a pouty bitch. I tried talkig to her about because it would be pretty ridiculous the way she would react sometimes, and she says she has a problem with trusting people, and she won't trust anyone, including me, so I shouldn't laugh at her because she can't trust that I'm not seriously making fun of her or talking shit behind her b

(which I have NEVER done to her, or anyone really) I haven't done anything to not deserve her trust and it really annoys me that she expects me to trust her, let her laugh at me, and say jokes about me, but I'm not allowed to do the same to her. I laugh and I make jokes about my friends, it's who I am and I'm not going to change it for anyone.

She is acting like I am her boyfriend and that I should put up with her bullshit and apologize when I have done nothing wrong. She doesn't understand what the word COMPROMISE means. I feel really responsible for being her friend because she is a foreign exchange student and I'm her closest friend. She relies on me so much and I feel that if I stopped being friends with her she would want to quit the program and go home. Is this how all Aquarius are? Acting like they are the center of the world and have no compromise? Just don't care about others or how they feel? How can I talk to her about this because I am about to rip my hair out in frustration!

Sorry hun but what you described DOESN'T sound like an Aqua thing. This has more to do with who SHE is as an individual person.

Sounds like she's stubborn, selfish, childish & demanding. E.I. a complete "buzz kill." She punishes everyone b/c of HER own insecurities that only SHE can control. All that nonsense about her always needing attention (and the center of it) is nothing more than PURE insecurity.

People like her who always have to have their way are like that b/c of their tremendous fear of NOT being IN CONTROL. Instead of her working towards fixing her self-esteem issues & the things she's self-conscious about, she'd rather just force you guys to be quiet, not laugh and/or be your true selves around her. And it's all b/c in HER mind, she figures that if she has the control, she won't have to face her fears or insecurities.

Honey, if something is funny, LAUGH! If you guys want to watch a movie that she doesn't, remind her that "MAJORITY RULES!" & that if she's gonna pout after not getting her way, that she's welcome to walk out of the front door & pout on someone ELSE's time! If she can't handle the REALITY that MOST people won't accept her "MY way or the highway" mindset, then she needs to either be to herself OR go find some other friends who don't mind catering to her 24-7. And if she continues to pout even AFTER you guys ignore her & go on to do what the GROUP as a whole wanted to do, then show her the door!

It may sound harsh, BUT the best way to deal with people like that is to SHOW them better than you can TELL them that the world does NOT revolve around them. So on those days where she pouts, continue to ignore her. On those days when she tries to make you feel guilty for having a freakin' sense of humor, tell HER to lighten up a little. Don't cater to her. Don't give in to her or else YOU ALL will be enabling her to act the way she does. The same goes for children, they can kick & scream all they want BUT when the ADULT ignores them & SHOWS them whose in control, that child after a while will give up & start acting right. BUT, the adult has to stand FIRM & be CONSISTENT though in order for it to work!

She's VERY aware of how she's acting, BUT that doesn't mean that she wants anyone to speak to her about it. She'll just get defensive & "denial" will be written in PERMANENT MARKER all over her face. The issues she has are NOT just some "mood" or "funk" or "phase" she's in for 1 day or 2. This is WHO SHE IS. This is a part of her personality! And WHO SHE IS won't change overnight all b/c someone had a "talk" with her no diff. than the things you consider funny won't STOP being funny to you on the inside all b/c someone makes you feel bad for laughing.

I think you should tell her more through your ACTIONS. Stop inviting her to places where you ALREADY know she's likely to start acting that way again. For example, the next time you're in the mood for "movie night," don't invite her if you already know what's going to happen the minute others may not want what SHE wants.

And if you're going to say something at all to her, you should call her out in the MOMENT when she starts acting a certain way. The minute she folds her arms & starts pouting, THAT is when you should tell her about herself. I'm not saying be rude or embarrass her, BUT let her know that you guys WILL NOT stand for it. And unfortunately, sometimes the ONLY way to let people know what you WON'T put up with is to tell them right then & there in the moment!

I have a friend whose JUST like this! Down to the tee! And she's coincidentally an Aquarius too! If I'm even 2 minutes late, she'll call me to say, "Nevermind" & then act funny for the rest of the night. Wanna know how I handled her azs!?? I stopped calling her & made it known that while SHE was at home pouting & be petty, I was STILL out having a good time! And see, once she realized that her bullshxt didn't affect/work on me, she knew she had to do/change SOMETHING in order to gain the privelege of being in my company again! She expected me to cater to her & suck up to her & beg her but I REFUSED TO! The next time she asked me to come over, she KNEW BETTER not to pull that same bull on me persay I was 2 min. late AGAIN!

This is what I mean when I say that it's possible to show someone you're ABOVE/over their tantrums w/o necessarily being mean or stooping to THEIR LEVEL to acheive that. You give people ultimatums! They can either 1. Continue to pout AND/BUT be by THEMSELVES...OR...2. They can grow up & SUCK IT UP if they want our company AND friendship!

She sounds like an absolute nightmare.

Is this how all Aquarius are?

Nope. We aren't all the same - nobody is. That applies to all signs.

Acting like they are the center of the world and have no compromise?

I had a friend over the other night and we watched her favourite movie. I enjoyed it. I didn't sit there sulking or anything. I just go with the flow. Best way to be.

Just don't care about others or how they feel?

I care a lot about others feelings... I certainly wouldn't want to hurt anybody. I want to make people happy. 🙂

How can I talk to her about this because I am about to rip my hair out in frustration!

Well that is the million dollar question. She is who she is. She seems quite spoilt and it's pretty clear that she usually gets her own way. The way that she has acted has been very immature. Whilst nobody is perfect there is simply no reason to act like that. She basically tried to ruin it all for everyone. Which is unfair considering that she had already seen the other movie anyway. Very selfish and immature.

This isn't a typical Aquarian thing, we're usually pretty compromising because the priority is on the people we spend time with, not the way in which we do it.

I would say to her "Look, I realise you like to have things your way, and that's okay for you, but it's not okay for me when you make it uncomfortable to get to that point. Perhaps you could put yourself in the shoes of other people and see that your behaviour is immature when you feel you're not getting your own way".

She may well tell you to get stuffed, but I doubt she'll be pissy for long, since she'll most definitely respect you saying it and it's important to have the respect for other people before any change in attitude will happen.

People are generally pretty adaptable to compromise when they realise what they do to get what they want isn't going to get them anywhere.

Call her out on it and explain that while you think she's an awesome person, there are situations that you cannot accept because they create unnecessary tension.

Go from there.

I agree with NZaqua. I think that no matter WHAT you say, there's a good chance she'll get offended or defensive.

It'd be different if she acted this way only a few times OR if she was only like this when she's going through something tramatic, BUT if this is how she is regularly then that's a good indication that this is WHO she is. And if that's the case, I'm sure she's been like this for a long time AND that she's like this with & around other people too.

Who knows, other people might bow down/give in to her, thus only making her assume that being that way is ok. And the only way she'll finally learn that NO, it's NOT ok for her to be this way is if the people she cares about the most SHOW her that they won't tolerate it. And just like with children, the minute you ignore them OR threaten to leave them to wallow in their OWN tantrum, they'll usually get it together.

Trust me, she'll get it together or ATLEAST PRETEND to have it together when she's around you guys if it'll mean that she'll still get the priveledge of your company & friendship. BUT, people like this usually have to be warned that if they continue acting this way that they'll end up alone & ignored. And since this is an insecure person's WORST fear, it's amazing how much they can CHECK themselves at the door afterwards. BUT people have to confront them 1st or else they'll just keep on doing it.

Do Aquas typically act like that? HELL NO. But do childish/insecure people act like that? MOST of the time! Hell if anything Aquas are VERY self-conscious about how they appear to others, especially thier closest friends. We care ALOT of how our close friends feel about us, so if anything you'd be more likely to see an Aqua suck it up in the moment & yet complain later (once you literally PULL it out of them). I'd hate being the "buzz kill" so even though it might suck that I didn't get my way, I'd suck it up & NOT let others around me know that it phased me! Aquas are very good at saving face!

You guys are right lol any sort of generalization is bad to do. I think this is just what an immature self-conscious Aquarius is like (I didn't think they existed!) Because I just remembered that one of my BEST friends of all time is also Aqua and she NEVER did anything like this and she cares a lot about me too so I know it's not an "aqua" thing. I started to not put up with her bs and it worked, I had her apologizing almost instantly. She also started searching for more friends then just me after that little... conflict, so now she isn't so dependent on me, and I can be even more stand-offish with her. It really works though. She just needs to get a little less self-conscious and grow up a bit (she is younger then me) Thanks!

@Airy: You said the magic words. When you put your foot down, she got it together REAL quick! That's how it usually is! It sucks but hey, there's always a way to put someone in their place.

Maybe it's a good thing that she's looking for more friends to hang with other than you guys. And hey, if those other new friends don't mind her tantrums, good for them! BUT, man oh man it sucks b/c it's obvious that you really like this girl. But you can't ignore the fact that she's being so childish. And it's even worse that this KEEPS happening. 1 time? Ok, I forgive you. BUT if they keep making it a pattern, something's got to give!

glad it worked out for you. personally i wouldnt have accepted such behavior from anyone. my love is a harsh love.