Is he being an Aquarian or just being a man*—

*This is a disclaimer: I am generalizing with this topic title...No offense men. ;o)

I've been seeing my 28yr old Aquarius for about 4 months now, while he's not the type to always say "I like you, you were on my mind,etc." He is the type to call daily, make dating plans, fix things around my house. We laugh about how alike we are, but yet how different our personalities can be. (He says he's the ying to my yang. Lol.) I think that since his b-day is Feb 16 closer to March, he has some Pisces influence. He is far from aloof. He very affectionate. He a great conversationalist. He does not like talking about his feelings alot though, but I chalked that up to him being "manly". Lol.
There's only one problem I have with him so far- We spend every weekend together (we live an hour apart so weekdays are difficult because of work), hangout with each other's friends, we leave clothes at each other's house, he said he wants us to have a baby in the next couple of years, where we should live in the future, etc. (All things people do/say if they are in a committed relationship or looking for one, in my opinion). So, things seem to be going very well EXCEPT he's being slow to make it "exclusive". I am a very decisive person- so I've made up my mind that I only want to date/sleep with him, he says that he isn't seeing/sleeping with anyone else, but he thinks it's too early to be a couple. He says that he wants more time to get to know me. This sounds like a crock of sh*t to me. I feel like as much time as we spend together, he should be ready to decide. (He's been in several long term relationships before- the last one cheated.) I'm debating whether to give him another month or so because after 5 months how can one not know if you want to be exclusive?? I definitely don't want to waste my time if he's not looking for a relationship, and he's just saying the things he thinks I want to here until he finds someone else. Right now I feel he's having his cake (getting the perks of a relationship without the commitment) or am I being irrational and it takes more time to decide for some? Any thoughts?

If it makes you feel any better, I've been dating mine for 5 months and there's no talk of exclusivity either. However, I can chalk that up to him leaving in 2 weeks for 4 months...so there's no point in starting anything serious.

I think you should just ride it out. Honestly, even though I've been dating my aqua for about the same time you've been seeing your aqua....I still don't feel like I know him well enough. It's easy to get caught up in how you feel when you're around someone - the happiness and what not. But I think it takes time to really KNOW someone. Someone made this analogy for me when it comes to aquas and their dating style : The "normal" style of dating consists of people realizing they like each other and then deciding they want to date one another...getting to know the other person along the way. However, Aquas would rather get to know you, THEN date you. I think it rings very true.

On the bright side, at least you know you're dealing with a man who takes commitment very seriously. Once he decides to bridge the gap, he'll probably be in it for the long haul. One thing I notice about aqua men - they are VERY hard to commit, but once they do it's almost like a life long choice...or at least turns out that way.

Posted by TasteOfChaos
He talks about wanting to have babies with you, yet then says its too early to be a couple?

Aquas are weird...

Lol. That's what I said!

Thanks for the positive advice, candyapples. I think your right that he takes commitment very seriously. He said he usually is friends with the people he's dated in the past then it develops into a romantic relationship so he knew them very well. We definitely didn't start off as only friends...It was romantic from the start. We are quickly becoming friends also. It's like a bonus- friends and romantic feelings. I'm liking this. :o) I will think with my head and not just my heart, and pay attention to if his actions in the future match his words. Eventually if he doesn't commit, then he has to go because I want a monogamous relationship, a family, etc. I'm going to try to be positive about the whole thing and mellow my demanding/intense "Scorpio-self" down a notch. Lol.

Posted by candyapples88
If it makes you feel any better, I've been dating mine for 5 months and there's no talk of exclusivity either. However, I can chalk that up to him leaving in 2 weeks for 4 months...so there's no point in starting anything serious.

I think you should just ride it out. Honestly, even though I've been dating my aqua for about the same time you've been seeing your aqua....I still don't feel like I know him well enough. It's easy to get caught up in how you feel when you're around someone - the happiness and what not. But I think it takes time to really KNOW someone. Someone made this analogy for me when it comes to aquas and their dating style : The "normal" style of dating consists of people realizing they like each other and then deciding they want to date one another...getting to know the other person along the way. However, Aquas would rather get to know you, THEN date you. I think it rings very true.

On the bright side, at least you know you're dealing with a man who takes commitment very seriously. Once he decides to bridge the gap, he'll probably be in it for the long haul. One thing I notice about aqua men - they are VERY hard to commit, but once they do it's almost like a life long choice...or at least turns out that way.

I think its a crock of shit. But, that's not really saying much other than its a crock of shit.

What candyapples said is right on the money though. I DO like to get to know someone and THEN date them (however again..sounds like you two know eachother quite well which is why I think its a crock of shit). But she's also right about the fact that he must take commitment seriously. That's something I like very much about men who take a long time to get into relationships.

And finally candyapples hit it out of the ballpark when she said that Aquas are very hard to commit, but once they do it's a life long choice. That is exactly how I am. I've been in many relationships where I was never really IN. I always had one foot out the door. With one man and one man only I am MADLY in love and I am LOCKED in for life whether my love is returned or not. It's like a tatoo.

Flashforward to the present...My Aquarius and I (the Scorpio) are now exclusive. I just said to him one day- "We've been seeing each other for over 6 months, do you want us to be exclusive or do you want us to date and have sex with other people?" He stared at me for a minute or so then said "No, I definitely don't want us to see or have sex with other people." Then I said, "Are you sure? If you're not ready for exclusivity then we can be friends so you can date whomever you want." He looked at me like I was crazy and gave me a big kiss.
It's nice dating someone that calls regularly, shows interest in seeing me, and talks about the future and includes me in his plans. Our relationship is full of laughter, fun times, affection, and great sex. I've definitely fallen for him. I told him I love him, but he said that he isn't ready to say "it" yet, but he can see himself in love with me. Lol. This is no big deal to me because, as I told him, I don't want him to say it until he feels ready. (SN: His last girlfriend cheated on him so he says he wants to be sure about the next woman he loves.) It'll be interesting to see where this relationship goes. Regardless of what the future holds, I'm going to enjoy this one to the fullest. :-)