Not sure how to deal with this

I believe I posted about my Aqua mother before. She's an incredibly independent woman, never been married, and while she has had long term relationships before, she tends to jump from relationship to relationship, either due to boredom or the relationship going sour.

I also mentioned before that my mother had met someone new very recently. Here's the info from the thread:

Posted by Candeh15
My mom doesn't really settle for anyone. She's never been married, and recently she was dating two men at the same time, but has sort of reached her limit with the both of them. She told me she met someone else the other day (more like she was introduced to him through a friend). She wasn't interested at first, but she went through with it and found out he was a pretty nice guy. Long story short, the guy invited her to a party for people celebrating February birthdays. My mother's birthday is February 8th. She asked the guy what his birthday was... February 8th. He is 5 years younger than my mother, but it immediately rang a bell when I found out they had the same birthday. According to the friend who matched my mother with the guy, he has her personality and wit. Oh boy.

So based off both of their charts, do you see a match?

My mother's chart:

Sun Aquarius 19.43
Moon Scorpio 19.45
Mercury Pisces 7.37
Venus Aries 6.14
Mars Cancer 0.01
Jupiter Capricorn 22.59
Saturn Capricorn 24.06
Uranus Leo 23.55 R
Neptune Scorpio 11.19
Pluto Virgo 7.16 R
Lilith Leo 0.47
Asc node Virgo 6.22

The guy's chart:

Sun Aquarius 19.27
Moon Libra 1.55
Mercury Aquarius 21.24
Venus Capricorn 29.17 R
Mars Pisces 7.24
Jupiter Gemini 21.19 R
Saturn Pisces 16.14
Uranus Virgo 18.44 R
Neptune Scorpio 22.08
Pluto Virgo 17.53 R
Lilith Aquarius 24.12
Asc node Gemini 1.14

Well, there has been a new development. My mother called me like a week and a half ago to tell me that she and her aqua guy are getting married. Now, normally I would feel ecstatic. However, I was completely floored, and not necessarily in the good way. The main issue is... I've never met the man. She called me the other day as well and not only is she still planning to marry this guy, but she's getting married in July. And apparently I am a bridesmaid. I haven't had a lot of time to process any of this.

I do know of couples that sometimes marry very early on and plan to get to know each other afterward, but I guess with my mother's track record, I'm not entirely sure if this could work.

I spoke with my older brother and sister and law, and they both feel the same way I do. I specifically spoke to my brother, and we both feel weary, mostly because we have never met the man, and we feel a little disrespected. He had thought I had at least met my mother's fiance, but I told him I hadn't. I guess we both feel like we need to know him first considering he is still goign to be our stepfather. Despite us being older and moving on, this guy is possibly going to be in our lives for a long time, and neither of us have had any time to bond or even get to know him. With the way things turn out, I probably won't meet him until the wedding day.

So... what steps should I take to learn to accept this?

mm there is not way for you to go and met these guy before your mom marries him? its that aqua/aqua attraction, it is very strong and we fall for each other fast if things a clicking right. i wont say anything other than that because its your mom. the mutual respect, the laughter, understanding each other like know one else...etc.

i say see what this guy is all about so you can have some peace about the whole thing. and tell your mom you feel blindsided/not against the whole thing. then maybe the family can make a greater effort for you and your brother to get to know each him.

You also said how your mother moves from relationship to relationship a lot, so I think you should put that into retrospect. How did she act in those relationships compared to this one. Is your mom the type of person to jump into things blindly or does she think things through. I feel like that will help you cope with this good or bad. Also me and her have a very similar chart up to mars except I have a sag moon I kinda feel like I can relate to her.