Can I still get my Aries ex back?

hi, need some advise from you guys. First of all, pardon my grammar, English is not my first language. 🙂

I'm a Virgo and my ex is an Aries. We were together for almost 2.5 years, and known each other for almost 3 years. He's 3 years younger than me. At the beginning of the r/s he was the one who chased me and really wanted to go out with me, I wasn't really keen to be with him because I always thought that he's too much of a player and way too young for me (I was 28 and he was 25 when we started going out). BUt being an Aries he was so persistence and took it as a challenge. After he chased me for 6 months, I agreed to get together. He was amazing as a bf, he would do anything for me and he never let me down. He was the best bf any girl can ask for. Unfortunately, I didn't realize it when we're still together. I took him for granted, tried to break up with him over every single argument. But he never let me go, he always picked up the pieces and put us back together. I didn't know why it was so difficult for me at that time to believe that he actually care and really love me. We went for family holidays with his parents and we always spend time together whenever I'm around. I'm a flight attendant btw.

Cut story short, around 6 months back, my younger sister got engaged and two of my good friend also got engaged. I was freaking out and I feel that my r/s is not moving anywhere. So I decided to give my bf an ultimatum, (I know that's the worst thing you can do to Aries man), it is either to get married next year or its over. He was really shocked with my ultimatum. He admit that he's not ready for that, and he offered me to compromise by moving in together next year and get engaged first. I rejected his offer and I told him it's over. Now I think about it again, I really dont know what the hell is wrong with me.

So we broke up. For the first 2 weeks he still constantly msg ing me. And he still call me when I'm in overseas. A month after the break up I started to miss him. And I realized that he's the one for me. I tried to talk to him more often. And seems like he enjoys that too. We message each other almost everyday. And on my birthday which is only few days ago he sent me flowers and birthday cake. Moving on, I bumped into him in a party last night. We were both drunk and we started to argue, basically I tried to convince him that we should get back together, he told me that for the past 2 years of our relationship I never appreciated him.

And he said he's done everything to keep us together but I've let him down with my ultimatum. So I told him I'm sorry and that I really love him and I wanna work things out with him. Then he told me that he's seeing another girl at the moment. He said that he only know her for a week but she's a really nice girl and she gives her more attention than what I did for the past 2 years. Things went ugly that night. Our worst fight ever. The next day he came over to my place to get some stuff and we spoke for a while. He said he's really sorry for hurting me and he said I need to move on because he can't be with me anymore. So I asked him why did he send me flower and cake for my birthday, his answer was because he still care and he wanna make me happy on my birthday but doesn't mean he gonna come back to me.

I don't know what to do. Should I let him go and move on with my life? or should I try to get him back.

Just additional info, the girl that he's seeing is actually my colleague and we have alot of common friends.

thanks for reading my post.

Leave the dude alone.

Idk about this dude but it would be a wrap for me as a Aries gal. After I give my all and go super hard for someone and it isn't reciprocated and appreciated, I feel stupid. Then to get dumped on top of it, I'd be devastated. However I'll pick up the pieces and eventually be able to put a brave face on again and keep it pushing. I will never forget though and once I have detached my feelings for the person or situation, I cannot get those feelings back.....EVER

Posted by bkbella86
Idk about this dude but it would be a wrap for me as a Aries gal. After I give my all and go super hard for someone and it isn't reciprocated and appreciated, I feel stupid. Then to get dumped on top of it, I'd be devastated. However I'll pick up the pieces and eventually be able to put a brave face on again and keep it pushing. I will never forget though and once I have detached my feelings for the person or situation, I cannot get those feelings back.....EVER

This. I've had ponderings of "what if" with past guys. Some, in theory, I wouldn't mind giving it a try again, but as time went on, I just get eh about it. So basically, in theory it sounds good, but when I sit there and picture myself actually in the situation where we'd try again... I just don't see it happening. Then I realize just how turned off I've become to them. The idea is nice, but then you think about all the crap they did and how they made you feel, all unappreciated... Yeeeah, no.

People need to be more appreciative of what they have. To think they should deserve another chance after such behavior is bs. You can't help but wonder if their new "chance" is going to be appreciated either. There will always be that bs of the past hovering over the entire scenario and you just can't fully enjoy it for what it is. That, and can you really trust them again? Who's to say that they won't do that bs all over in another scenario and then realize they screwed up? Talk about being someone's emotional punching bag...

OP, you come off as a tad emotionally unstable in the relationship department. Go work on yourself and leave this guy alone. He's clearly moved on. Respect that and go away. You already put it out there that you want to try again. If he were ever to be interested again, maybe he'll come back around. But after how you treated him, I doubt it. Consider this a learning experience and next time, keep your shit together.

thanks for replying to my post. I have a better picture of the situation now. I guess as you all said he's already moved on and he wont look back and I respect that. And I'm just gonna take it as a learning experience. Thanks again.

King of Aries, I guess I deserve that.

Anyway, we haven't spoken since our mega fight few days ago. But he wrote to me today. He said he feels bad about our fight that night. And that he still really in love with me and how the break up has broke his heart. But he feels that we're not meant to be together. And especially for him after giving everything for me and never get appreciated he just can't be with me anymore even though he still love me.
He also wrote how he wishes I would turn to him before we broke up and say 'ill never walk away again' but I didnt. We kept making the same mistakes. And he said he knows that I'm sad because he's seeing another girl but this is the only way he knows to get over me.

In my reply to him, I apologized for taking him for granted and not to have faith in our relationship??an for letting him down. And that this is a good learning experience for me. And I told him that he deserves someone better and someone who gonna take care of him.

I feel so relieved that we talked it out and hopefully we can talk again as friends someday. This is really difficult for me but I know I need to move on.

hey just wanna share some updates. Me and my ex are now in talking term again. We emailed each other almost every day, no phone call though. Recently I was so busy and didn't contact him for one day and the next day he emailed me saying that he feels really down when I didnt speak to him and he kept thinking about me, and he said he has gone through our photos on Facebook (yes we both still have each other photos on our facebook) and it reminds him how great our relationship was and how we understand each other. And he also said that he feels comfortable talking to me like it always has. And the other girl is just a distraction, he tried to replace me with her but it seems impossible.

I don't understand why he still saying this kind of stuff to me? Does he still love me? Or he's just having an emotional breakdown. Because the next day he went back to his normal stuff and never mentioned about that conversation again. ANd I didn't ask him about it either.

Thoughts?

No thoughts because it doesn't matter. You couldn't follow basic advice from before and now continues the string of bs. You're on your own.

hey, I really want to move on. But it is really difficult when he's still talking to me every single day. I tried to ignore him but not replying but then he will start asking me why did I ignore him.
Obviously I still care about him, and I'm sure he feels the same way. It's been an emotional roller coaster for us for the past few months. I'm so confused .