ami_virgo19
@ami_virgo19
19 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 206 · Topics: 67
What would you do in my situation?
Tough one. Ultimately you need another heart to heart. If this is truly her big dream in life, and what she really wants to do, then let her have wings. If your relationship is strong, it will stand the test of time. In the long run, she is going to have reach a place of autonomy from her parents, albiet as respectfully as she can. In the short of it, is there a way you can both compromise and perhaps move as close as you can or closer to Manchester, without actually being there? *wishing you both the best of luck! s*
Putting myself in your position, if I could quite happily live in either I'd move; because in the long run your girlfriend may end up resenting you, even if unintentionally. If the parents have such a problem, then maybe somewhere else where you could move to that you'd both do happily. Again I don't know everything about your situation, like do you own you own place and it's not easy to sell up or move jobs etc, then you need to sit down with your gf and seriously discuss whether compromise is possible, because over the long term, are you going to forever live in separate places, it may just be time to part ways. It's a hard decision, all the best with it.
Ami, I responded on this on the Virgo board .... but, I have another question:
When you said to get work, did you mean in local theatre? Like plays?
To be in a small town, I could see how this would be a problem if an actress is stage and there can't be that many playhouses ... however, to see a movie, those are screen actors. Plus, Manchester was just the setting for the filming and not really any indication to suggest that a person has to live in Manchester to be filmed on location there.
I agree with mystic and skin that you won't want to hold her back, for later she could come to resent you ... but, I don't see this as being so black and white. There is some gray area here. If a person is a screen actress, and not stage ... I really don't see the relevance of where she resides.
To be perfectly honest with you (and since her reasoning doesn't make sense to me) .. I get the impression that she is feeling unsuccessful in her field, and is using this as an excuse to make herself feel better. And I don't mean anything against her, for we all do this from time to time ... when we are feeling bad about ourselves, we look for valid reasons to lift our self-esteem.
Again, like I said on the Virgo board .. instead of just this black or white solution, in your position, I would encourage her to find a better agent who will get her auditions, for I can't see how residency of an actor is relevant, if it's screen.
When you said to get work, did you mean in local theatre? Like plays?
To be in a small town, I could see how this would be a problem if an actress is stage and there can't be that many playhouses ... however, to see a movie, those are screen actors. Plus, Manchester was just the setting for the filming and not really any indication to suggest that a person has to live in Manchester to be filmed on location there.
I agree with mystic and skin that you won't want to hold her back, for later she could come to resent you ... but, I don't see this as being so black and white. There is some gray area here. If a person is a screen actress, and not stage ... I really don't see the relevance of where she resides.
To be perfectly honest with you (and since her reasoning doesn't make sense to me) .. I get the impression that she is feeling unsuccessful in her field, and is using this as an excuse to make herself feel better. And I don't mean anything against her, for we all do this from time to time ... when we are feeling bad about ourselves, we look for valid reasons to lift our self-esteem.
Again, like I said on the Virgo board .. instead of just this black or white solution, in your position, I would encourage her to find a better agent who will get her auditions, for I can't see how residency of an actor is relevant, if it's screen.
That makes sense, bijou ...
I remember reading once that a lot of actors get jobs with the playhouse, or academy in which they trained to get their foot in the door, get some experience, get noticed. In fact, in reading about actors (SB mainly) .. they moved TO the city, like London, instead of away.
So, I would be curious if Ami's girlfriend has done productions with her school. It would seem logical that if the school was doing regular productions in which they used their students, and graduated ones, then it wouldn't have been a prudent move, career-wise, to re-locate away.
I remember reading once that a lot of actors get jobs with the playhouse, or academy in which they trained to get their foot in the door, get some experience, get noticed. In fact, in reading about actors (SB mainly) .. they moved TO the city, like London, instead of away.
So, I would be curious if Ami's girlfriend has done productions with her school. It would seem logical that if the school was doing regular productions in which they used their students, and graduated ones, then it wouldn't have been a prudent move, career-wise, to re-locate away.
I agree with Mystic_ Fish, You have to let her spread her wings and the strenght of your love will handle the rest.. if it's meant.. things will line up...
Moro - i dont think she will leave me so speak, just long distance relationships are hard, we did it for 6 months, i am supportive of her i want her to suceed sooo much but i worry that i am holding her back or atleast Hull is hold in her back because there is no opportunity in Hull, should i do the right thing and just say your are better off in Manc, ill stay in Hull and she can see me every weekend or something. i do honestly think she wants to move home but doesnt have the heart to tell me.?
Skin - I agree if she stays here and nothing comes of it then she may resent me, if i give her the option to go home, hopefulyl she will see im trying to support her and have her best interests at heart.
i dont think we will live apart forever, but for the time being while she is starting out with her acting, it would be best for her to live in a larger town? for the time being she can then live at home with parents, they will be happy she is home, she will be closer to drama and see me every weekend.
i dont think we will live apart forever, but for the time being while she is starting out with her acting, it would be best for her to live in a larger town? for the time being she can then live at home with parents, they will be happy she is home, she will be closer to drama and see me every weekend.
P-Angel i totally agree with you, my girlfriend had been offered plays but then cannot commit as much as she should be able to because she lives to far away!
maybe you are right, she feeling unsuccessful but she has lived with me a year and hasnt done anything in that time, but i think i may help her feel better if she moves back home, she will be able to save cash to go traveling.
maybe you are right, she feeling unsuccessful but she has lived with me a year and hasnt done anything in that time, but i think i may help her feel better if she moves back home, she will be able to save cash to go traveling.
Bijou - the reason she moved down in the first place was to be with me and also Hull is a cheaper place to live so she could save up cash for us to go travelling, but i believe now she is getting stressed out that her uni friends are gettign work and she isnt?
i think i will mention it to her next week, she isnt very well at the minute, so should let her recover
Much Love for comments!
i think i will mention it to her next week, she isnt very well at the minute, so should let her recover
Much Love for comments!
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Last night we were watching a drama called "Cold blood" it was filmed in her home town Manchester, as we were watching she noticed one of the Actresses was someone who she went to University with, My girlfriend told me that when they were at Uni, her tutor told her that she was always the more talented one of the two.
she got upset that the other girl was acting and she wasnt, i believe this is alot to do with the fact she lives in Hull now so there is not as much prospect, i have since thought about asking her to move back home, to pursue her acting, is it selfish of me to keep her here because we live together?
she doesnt want me to move to manchester because her parents dont like the fact she is gay, but if she moves back home with her parents, she will be living in a better town for her career and hopefully her acting will move forward??
the downside for me, we wont live together and we will only see each other once a week maybe once every 2 weeks, but i can see how sad she is getting that her acting is suffering, should i say she should move home and hopefully her acting will progress? but will our relationship suffer?
What should i do?