How do you behave when truly done

Dealing with a Cancer who has lots of fear, and stress in his life.

We have a long history.

I noticed we get back in touch for a while and when anything happens he will cut me out.

The love I believe is still there. We just saw each other after years. He was very loving and affectionate.

I can't get through to him. Haven't been mean, but he is cold, angry and mean saying he's moving on with his life and to not call or text him.

How do you behave when you are truly done and what would make you cut someone out of your life?

Is there a way to reach his heart.

Truly love him. First love. Love of my life.

Well. I had a similar situation but with a Cancer woman. I just simply that back and just lied in regret that I never listened to my friend about her and her scandalous ways. She had way too many issues that already took her over and ruined her. Now no one likes her.

Posted by euphoriaoneone11
Dealing with a Cancer who has lots of fear, and stress in his life.

We have a long history.

I noticed we get back in touch for a while and when anything happens he will cut me out.

The love I believe is still there. We just saw each other after years. He was very loving and affectionate.

I can't get through to him. Haven't been mean, but he is cold, angry and mean saying he's moving on with his life and to not call or text him.

How do you behave when you are truly done and what would make you cut someone out of your life?

Is there a way to reach his heart.

Truly love him. First love. Love of my life.

Not enough detail here to truly understand the situation.
I get the impression there is something you're not saying.
What I can tell you is that if he has told you he is "moving on and not to call or text him", he means it.
There's no way of reaching a Cancer's heart if they don't want you there.

He is under a lot of stress. I am under a lot of stress as well. My world has been sinking. He was as supportive as he can be. Besides that, we were doing well overall. And our conversations weren't all about problems, but laughing a lot. Few months prior to seeing one another, he broke down and said he still loved me over and over. A few months later we end up seeing each other after years of not. He held me for a few hours like how he would hold me before. Very lovingly, intimately. Very affectionate. Very happy to see me. Got me a few little thoughtful gifts. He was distant the next day. I would call and he would text telling me why he missed my call and to have a good day, etc. Then he slowly started dropping out due to stress out work. I reacted emotionally (understandingly so considering my situation). He then told me he had too much on his plate and was too busy and preoccupied for anyone in his life and that it seemed we had to go our separate ways. I was heartbroken. Text him few times, etc. Two weeks later I casually text him. Then text him asking for help. And his response was what I mentioned in my post.

Don't understand at all what happened.

How can you go from supportive, loving, romantically beyond affectionate, to cutting a person out for good?

Posted by euphoriaoneone11
He is under a lot of stress. I am under a lot of stress as well. My world has been sinking. He was as supportive as he can be. Besides that, we were doing well overall. And our conversations weren't all about problems, but laughing a lot. Few months prior to seeing one another, he broke down and said he still loved me over and over. A few months later we end up seeing each other after years of not. He held me for a few hours like how he would hold me before. Very lovingly, intimately. Very affectionate. Very happy to see me. Got me a few little thoughtful gifts. He was distant the next day. I would call and he would text telling me why he missed my call and to have a good day, etc. Then he slowly started dropping out due to stress out work. I reacted emotionally (understandingly so considering my situation). He then told me he had too much on his plate and was too busy and preoccupied for anyone in his life and that it seemed we had to go our separate ways. I was heartbroken. Text him few times, etc. Two weeks later I casually text him. Then text him asking for help. And his response was what I mentioned in my post.

Don't understand at all what happened.

Ok. If he is under that much pressure, he may not be able to deal with the additional burden of feelings he may have.
I don't think, based on what you have said, that he has cut you out.
Its not anything he has against you. He's probably been honest and doesn't feel secure enough to engage in a relationship.
If you like this guy, back off a little and occasionally send a light text letting him know you're still around. But you may want to get on with life, because there's no telling when he is going to be in a place where he can give you what you're looking for.

Any more thoughts would be appreciated.

Posted by aquavita
He may have someone else. a woman who is more benficial to his situation as well as if you have your many problems too(your life "sinking") he may see it as not a good match as he feels he can not be of help to u during his situation.

There is no one else.

We hadn't seen each other in years even though we still loved one another.
Is it possible he saw me and realized he no longer loved/desire me?
Or, he saw me, realized he loved me, became vulnerable and it scared him off?

Posted by aquavita

Posted by euphoriaoneone11

Posted by aquavita
He may have someone else. a woman who is more benficial to his situation as well as if you have your many problems too(your life "sinking") he may see it as not a good match as he feels he can not be of help to u during his situation.

There is no one else.

if u so well know him and all about him why do u not know the answer to your question?

click to expand

That's a strange comment. You can know certain things for sure, and other things not. This, I know for sure.

Irresistable Scorp, based on the circumstance I was in, yes I believe so. 😢
Is there any way to reverse this?

Posted by Sugarfoot

Posted by euphoriaoneone11
Irresistable Scorp, based on the circumstance I was in, yes I believe so. 😢
Is there any way to reverse this?

If you love someone, set them free. You can't force yourself onto a man. This one has communicated to you clearly that he needs space from you. If you really love him, then you want what's best for him. You want him to have all the things he wants. Give him the space. Basically I agree with canceronthecusp.

You need for him to reciprocate your feelings if the relationship is going to work. This is a good way to find out how he really feels about you. If he comes back after you've been gone awhile, then you'll know.

And, space does not always spell the end. Cancers don't like to lose people who truly love them. I think there's a good chance he'll be back after his life settles down. Remember these folks primary concern is their security. Money and kids trump everything and everyone else. Try not to take it personally.

click to expand

How long do I give him space? I mean, how long should I be "gone awhile"?

Really down about it all.

I am not sure if I feel comfortable contacting him 2 or even 3 weeks from now.

I was thinking maybe I should contact him father's day since his dad passed years ago. He doesn't talk much to others about it, except he had with me. I told him I'm right there with him, holding him any time he feels pain over it. He felt I was on his side with him.
Or maybe, contact him on his birthday casually.

Yet, I am not too sure about either one as I feel incredibly rejected and pushed away.

It really sucks when life gets the best of you sometimes and your actions filter through fear, anxiety or pain.

I am wondering, if intimacy issues may be coming into play as well?

The day after we saw one another, I was driving back. A few more issues from my end popped up and he was overloaded with his. Looking back, it clearly caused an irritation in him.

When we spoke the distance was there. Complete 180 from the day before. I asked why he was distant as he had been very loving and affectionate the day before. He said he wasn't. I responded by saying he had seen me, let his guard down, was vulnerable and now his guard was back up. He snapped and said "Yes, Exactly!!"

Because I don't function this way, and I like to understand the nature of humans in general as it gives me peace of mind and helps me have compassion, why the day to day extreme going from loving and affectionate after not seeing me in years, to distant with guard up the next day?