is cancer man using me or is there real feelings

hi. Im new here. im an aries female in love with a cancer man. I just dont know if he feels the same. It started as a friendship a year ago. we work togehter. He emailed me everyday. Then a few months later he started the dissapearing act. i stopped what ever it was we had. He came back. We have never been intimate but we do have sexual talks and we fooled around a few times, no kissing just touching and watching.

im in love with him , but dont know if he feels the same. He has 3 children with his ex wife. I dont know what type of relationship they have. I confessed my feelings to him a few weeks ago, but he just says he understands how i feel. Whatever that means. after that i told him that i will not only be his friend who he can have sex chats with. In the begining we talked about everything, now we only chat once a week and it is always sexual.

why do he keep on coming back if he has no feelings for me? He is alway sweet and never gets upset with me. He cant be coming back for sex, because we have never had sex?? Help me understand? At work he will always come to me' or stare at me or make jokes. He will never tell me how he feels.

thank you. I was just wondering why he will come back so many times for only sex convos? Were is the fun in that? And why he hasnt tried to have sex with me?he is confusing. He told him that im not his toy and will rather settle for friendship

the last time i told him that i will not be his play thing that he only has sex chats with and that he must leave me alone, he came back a few days later wantimg ti know if im feeling better. I told him this to try and get him to make up his mind.should i just ask him straigh out what it is he wants from me?

1) how long have you worked with him?
2) who initiated the flirting? and what kind of flirting was it? outright? sexual innuendo? btw, cancers don't necessarily flirt with people they are interested in dating. they are shy and very cautious.
3) how did you get to the intimacy part of touching/etc? were you on a date? did it happen at someone's home? who started it? how did it end?
4) has he ever said anything direct to you about his feelings?
5) have you had any further intimate contact or was it just that one night?
6) how sexual were the chats? did he say things he wanted to do with you?

We worked toghter for 3 years, but only started our friendship a year ago. I never noticed him in that way. He initated contact first. I was the one that flirted with him. He doesnt actuallly flirt. He will tell me sometimes what he would like to do with me sexually, but never flirts when we chat face to face. We have never been on a date, the touching happened at work. It ended when he started dissapearing for days, and then I decided we will not get physical again. It was me who told him I dont want to be with him like that only. But I must admit, I also give him mixed signals. I never initiate contact with him first. He is the one contacting me all the time. He has never said anything about his feelings, except the one time, when I told him we must stop this, he said that it is better as "He dreams about me and cant get me out of his head". Does this indirectly mean something?There was no further intimate contact.Im just thinking if he keeps on coming back to me, does this not mean he has feelings for me? The last time we chatted, he said thanks for me being so patient with him?