It's me again, Margaret....

OK... here's the scoop...... Cancer guy has been a little distant.... regulars know that this as been a crazy relationship from the beginning. I realize he is busy... and I have been too... but it only take 2 minutes to make a phone call.

He does live about 4 hours from me... and I have been thinking about surprising him. There is a local hangout that all of our "little gang" hangs out at. I was thinking about driving down... having one of his friends call him and telling him to stop by on his way home... and there I would be. (Is this a bad idea?) I am the only female that works with a varied group of guys ages 38-56...they all say it would flatter them to death to get a surprise like that. However, none of them are Cancers... and none of them are 64 years old. Personally, I would feel cherished if someone put that much thought and went to that much trouble to see me... So.... let's take a poll....... whatever you guys say..... this Leo gal will do..... Yeah's I go..... Nay's I don'

Thanks guys,.I need all the help I can get... I'm a basket case here...

HELL NO!

I did that to mines, and found him hugged up under some fat biotch. Good thing I was with someone else myself or I would have been really disappointed.LOL!

Then he confronts me about being with someone else, and I was not suppose to say anything to him. Yeah, right and the killing part was, HE is MAD at ME! LOL!

Patricia-

Be careful here. I just don't like surprises. I don't have another woman on the sly or anything. I'd assume this fellow dosen't either, but it might seem a little agressive for a cancer.

I would suggest you call him and tell him you have to be in the area for some other reason... (I know, a simple white lie) Ask if he would like to get together for a drink at the local watering hole? If he accepts, drive down, hang out and confess your "white" lie straight up! Tell him you came down just to be with him. This avoids the surprise, but will have the same or greater affect?

That way he knows you are willing to take the time, thinking of him, but you didn't totally surprise him.

Just my $ .02

Aces I have a question for you....

I am living my life...however I would be lying if I said I haven't thought of my cancer man and my apples lol

Still no word from him come tuesday it will be a week.....is there any hope or am I truly dilluding myself?

I haven't called him again because the ball is in his court!

Cheeky,
Be ready to be on a serious rollercoaster ride, OK, this man thrives for misery.

So Krobe how long will he keep me dangling....or do you think he will try to bump into me and see what kind of reaction he gets?

Know what aces_high9...you make a lot of sense. Thank you so much for the input. You're probably right. He is a very "settled" person.... pretty much has a set routine and you are probably right that just showing up might be a little pushy... I travel a lot in my job anyway.. and the past couple of times I have been in his area he has given me the royal treatment. We are both too old for the "cat and mouse" game.. and he and I have developed a very deep friendship along with a very strong attraction to each other. The last time I was in his area... he wouldn't hear of me staying in a motel... and he was the perfect gentleman. He's been divorced probably for about 7 years now.. and for me it has been almost 15...

I do love him.. and he will always tell me that he loves me... but I'm not certain if it is a friendship love or more. And to be honest... I don't know how to go about finding out. Most people would not believe it.. but I spent 4 days and 3 nights at his house and we did not sleep together. He gave me his room and he slept in the recliner in the living room. (His brother and son also live there.. so it was an inconvenience... but he insisted that I stay there and told me he was so glad that I came... and when I have talked to him since then he always tells me he misses me. (Boy.. I bet you wish I would shut up!) lol... anyway... I just think that you ALL have convinced me that a "surprise" visit would not be a good idea. So... I think I will wait until maybe the middle of or near the end of October... and try the little "white lie" of going to be in the area... and see how he responds. Maybe it's just that little thing called "fear of rejection" that keeps me from just coming out and asking him just what part I play in this story.... Do Cancer men usually act this way... keep you guessing... wondering..... and then spoil you to death when they finally come around?

Guess I have rambled enough... but just because I have decided to not surprise him, the rest of you please give me your thoughts on the best way to give him a little "nudge".... Neither of us are getting any younger... and I do love him...and would hate to mess things up with him. You ALL are the greatest... thank you for the encouraging words... even though sometimes they aren't what I want to hear.. I know that just like my parents would do... you are telling me for my own good.

This Leo is going to crawl into her "den".... and have a good nights sleep wit

I don't know what to tell you. He is a complex creature indeed. Never met one like him. LOL!

Patricia, Margret? Not sure who I'm writing to? You put out some more info that helps. I would not pull the big surprise thing, just my gut on me... I was reading thru, see you are an older lady and have some history with this fellow. Tell him how you feel and you want to jump his bones? Ha HA!!

No NO... Don't do that, be a bit discreet. But you women know how to say the unspoken. Use your instinct! Cancer men do appreciate a stong woman. There is a fine line here. I'm guessing he knows how you feel. It won't be a big "surprise" for him, you just gotta pull off the surprise corectly.

You can do it, I'm rooting for you here!

Cheeky-

I saw your post out here. Can you make casual contact with him, go somewhere he hangs out? You can use your eyes or make a subtle hint, I know you can!!

Otherwise just pick up the phone and call him!! You might even ask him out for a pizza? Always worked good for me. A cancer guy does not like to see real agressive women, you must dance the dance! You can invite him out, but deflate the situation, KEEP IT CASUAL!!

Just find a way to make contact, then use your instincts! Believe me, Cheeky they are there, I can see it in your writing, and he will see this so fast... Flash your eyes. Women have no idea how their straight up sensitive attitude can woo a man! I'll write more on this later!

Good luck Cheeky, you are fine and you hollar if I can do anything to help!!

Thanks Aces....

It sounds so easy but I seem to be having such difficulty with it....

Yes I know you like strong women....but if I keep at him won't he think I am desperate?

Sorry ya'll... I don't know much about astrology, lived in a black and white world for so long...

I'm fixing to cook up a big post, maybe help you all out. My Scorp girl and I are done and I write to blow off steam, get over it for me, whatever.

Cheeky, Margret, what ever I can do to help. Good luck to you, I am really rooting for both you.

Love is a battlefield and I don't much care for it. It would be so nice to find a nice simple girl, a soul mate and live our lives happily ever after. As Cheeky says, easier said than done...

This is a really intelligent post out here and I appreciate it. Keep it going and please keep me posted ya'll!!