A very cold breakup with a Cap

Hello and Question:

So recently my now ex-boyfriend took a two week road trip with guy friends en-route to a wedding.. Things with us were fine just days before. During his trip he would text me all day and night, sharing pictures and text of his current location. His trip seemed so much fun and I was missing him like crazy. He kept telling me that he loved me and that he couldn't wait to get back. Then out of the blue, three days out of his trip he started acting distant, not writing or calling as much.. I started to sense that something was off with us, as just a day before he was so loving and telling me that had gifts to bring back from each city.. I found myself calling and texting, only to get short answers. I know that most of the trip was spent touring cities, eating out at Restaurants, and bars and clubs. Bars and clubs I was not a fan of, but anyway, he would even text me while he was out at night. As I said everything seemed great but all of a sudden he became uninterested in speaking to me. He texted me finally on his last day away saying we he would be landing back home. Then he was still distant, he had lost all the lovie dovie attitude in exchange for pure coldness. We never got to speak that night, when I asked what was wrong via text, he just said that he was sad, confused, upset but that it wasnt my fault. Next day we speak and he says he wanted to be single and that this trip made him realize this and that he had such a great time and would enjoy being solo and hanging out with friends.And in his cold words, "I don't know what to tell you, it's a feeling I can't control". Utter coldness and annoyance in his voice. He said that on the last days of the trip he just completely forgot about me and that it was a bad feeling.. And that when it was time to come home the day of he had no sense to rush back to see me. No I'm sorry or anything. This has happened two weeks before our 2nd anniversary. We've had our share of ups and downs. I tried calling him again last night to see if we could talk peacefully and nicely. He proceeded to be really nasty, expressing that he wants to find other girls to date and that he is too young to be with one person and that it's gotten old to him. He now wants to be with friends and "sample more girls" so that he knows exactly what he wants. He said I remind him of things that he hates and that there is a lot that he doesnt like about me. He even admitted that he's given away something that he bought me but is

Some of this post got cut off somehow but I'm sure you get what I'm saying.

Meetoo-Wow this is the best thing I've heard so far... I'm trying to get back something that belongs to my sister. I texted last night asking if we could just exchange items and move on for good.He had another icey reply, saying "maybe tomorrow or Thursday". No real answer as to when he can return something that doesnt belong to me. I guess I have to call this one a loss. He's never done this to me and after I cried so hard and him not caring saying" I don't know what to tell you" is just not enough for me. So I understand this may be just the end. He also said we need to be with other people, I'm afraid there may be someone else in the picture. but he's not telling me anything. I may be losing it here.

I haven't cried in days so I guess I'm getting better

Metoo - You sound like the voice of reason I've been looking for. I will take in all you said, as I process everything. Thanks for helping me see through this situation with open eyes, instead the ones filled with tears, just a few days ago. He knows that I would make a good wife someday and that I'm not a party animal.. I am a scorpio and take love very seriously. I also love capricorns the most so I need to just find one more stable and older. For sure this trip proved he isnt ready now. So I think it's best to "keep going". I'm going to try to advance my career and go back for either a second degree of a masters, as I put on hold for some time. I think it's a sign to get my life back on the right track.. Has sent me an email this morning asking me if I was ok... I think I'm going to ignore it.

How do you go on a trip to a wedding and decide you want to be single??

Its interesting his spot in between his wild partying single friends, and the wedding. Its like he couldve looked at bothas directions his life could take and decided he's not ready to settle down. He still have things he want to do and experience.

He's going to regret it like crazy later on, especially since it appears the two if you had a good relationship.

Inana04-- This is puzzling to me as well. This is the basis of my distraught feelings of being confused by the sudden change of heart. I'm learning alot about this Cap in particular. I have heard that they tend to walk away without looking back. I'm going to take the suggestions of moving forward and take this a lesson.. I know that 24th is my sisters birthday I will probably associate it as the day he left me. It's hard but I'm going to start the healing process.

There is no one else in my opinion honey. He just thinks its cool right now to be single and able to love em and leave em. He is in a very deeply selfish mode.

Isn't it funny how they suddenly start believing that they are the object of desire of scores of women out there? It's so much better to be single because so many other women want them....LOL delusional and immature.

One day at a time. It will get easier, its just a hard road.

Thanks everyone.

Posted by WoundedLeo

Posted by Metoo

He contacted you because you stopped contacting him and he is concerned you are getting over him quickly.
His ego. Ugh, that Cap male ego. Spare me, dont respond. If you do, remind him he wanted to move on and he should let you by leaving you alone to go on with your life. How dare he treat you that way, say those things, break yout heart and have the nerve to turn around and say "Are you OK"? How are you SUPPOSED to answer that? You dont answer it, whats the point?
I wouldnt give him the satisfaction of response. Not suggesting you be bitter, but he asked for it. You are simply respecting yourself and focusing on YOU now! Bravo!

Right on! Not only are you respecting your yourself, but you're also respecting what HE HIMSELF asked for.

I can tell you that if the Cap who I'm so totally nuts about told me as clearly what your guy told you, I'd kick him out the door faster than you could say Pronto! Count yourself lucky in your sadness that you had a Cap who was clear and to the point.

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I totally agree. The anger of this situation for me is almost gone.

Oh hell no! What kind of immature BS is this guy full of? LOL Clearly you did not have a man but a boy and an unevolved Cap man is not worth any woman's time.

A long time ago my finally evolved and head-over-heels in love with me now Cap pulled something similar. I was devastated and shut down for a good while before I picked myself up and got my act together. It may sound easy to say but seriously? Don't sweat it. If you were good to this guy, I mean really good in all the ways that count the least of which is sex, he'll wake up to that fact one day and when he does the the slap of his reality will be heard around the world.

Yes he's a Cap but he's a man first irregardless of the sign. I don't know of any man that walked away from a good woman thinking the grass was gonna be greener on the other side who didn't live to regret that choice, especially if he tried to get the one that got away back and she either was claimed by a real man before the wake up or simply had nothing left to feel about him but a long ago mistake that turned into a valuble lesson all to her betterment. Either way? Let your Cap go because trying to hold on will only make you look desperate and sad. Let him experience that "greener grass" which will likely be one crazy azz cookiemonster after another. That's exactly what happened to my Cap. When I asked him if during our time apart he had found at the very least equal (since I knew he would never find better than I had been and was for him) his answer was no. That every woman after me was a bigger mistaken disater than the last.

Go easy on yourself. It isn't you hon. Let him play and when he gets played (and trust me he will...that's how Karma works)we'll see who has the last laugh. Until then? Dry those tears, stay strong and be open to life and love.

I am sorry to say, he met someone else to react that way. He would not just throw away a good relationship like that. He felt guilty about it and wanted to end it quickly with you by being so cold and direct. He made it clear not to bother with him any longer. Who does that out of the blue? It was either that or the truth that he met someone else. He chose the cowardly way. He will be back if you had a good thing. That's when you will have to be strong....