Detaching Mode

You know why do we do the detaching thing, because after realizing that the girl has completely fallen for me(capricorn guys), we actually become sort of nervous about the thing that after having her completely, now what should i do ? is the question revolves in our mind. We become worried about how to maintain the relationship. So thats why we find no solution for our worry and we do the detaching thing, so finally the girl thinks that we dont care about her, but actually it is completely the other way around, 24 hours we think about the girl only, its just we r scared to mess up anything. Basically we capguys need a strong women with a strong mind and heart who can handle us.

Ok well that I can agree with because I figured as much. I can also agree with the fact that they do need a strong woman. My question to you is this. If a Cap guy gave a woman the wrong impression and he realises his mistake, will he in any way try to redeem himself or will he just let it go. And is there anything the woman can do to show that she is still interested in him to make him more comfortable to come back to her?

That is very helpful, Cappyguy. What do you mean, "24 hours we think about the girl only"?? This detaching caused a whole mess of confusion and feelings of rejection for me. He went for 3 months ignoring me, after I told him [email] I wanted to date him and wanted a relationship and needed to know what he was looking for ultimately because I was still guessing. I assumed he was basically telling me that he didn't want the same, by him going MIA those months. Then he contacts me out of nowhere, professing to have been busy with school and exams, and that he doesn't always read all of his emails. He hinted at asking whether I was seeing anyone and seemed to want to see me/ get together, but I was still so mad, hurt, and confused, that I wasn't responsive to his hints. I suppose this could have been what you're describing??

Exactly Capgirl...thats why he has to answer my question about redemption....I hope he hasnt gone into "detaching mode" LOL!

I hope he's not "whoring" for sympathy! I just want him to answer my question. Hang in there Capgirl it aint over till its over.

Ugh- as usual, the true attention whore is stirring up his usual trouble...

Thanks, Febby. I will put in my 2 cents on your question while we wait for Cappyguy to reappear. I felt like mine was trying to redeem himself when he got back in touch, when I had essentially abandoned any further thoughts of him and had not tried to contact him for about 6 weeks. I had even run into him and gave him the icy-est treatment of completely ignoring him. And then it was 5 weeks later that he came forward on his own to contact me. I'll leave your other question though to Cappyguy, as I've tried lighthearted email/text/voicemail, to ease the pressure/seriousness of the situation and of having revealed my feelings, which didn't seem to get any immediate response or change in the detachment mode.

Thanks for the insight Capgirl. This just leads me to believe that maybe your guy sucked you back in to be sure you were still interested. These guys treat relationships like a layaway plan. But its good to know that if they are interested they come back at some point! But I wonder if if ever occured to them that their actions may give the female the wrong impression. I mean lets just say they dissapear or give you some lame story about why they cant be with you.....do they ever stop to think that maybe someone will take what they say seriously and completely close the door on them? OR!!!! maybe deep down inside they are hopeless romantics and think that if its true love the other person will always be there.....waiting.....waiting.....waiting...But who has that kind of time!

Isn't it funny that we're speaking about such things within a thread we've been lured into by a Cap male who has since disappeared, and we're now waiting... for his reappearance!?? LOL

All I know is at 44 years old the last thing I want to do is go through a lot of drama with men period, these guys are no different than any other man, there just more complicated.

I have no compassion for them at all. I will still date them but, being the type of person I am I will confront them on their personality, if they still want to date me fine at least they will know that I know there game and they understand what I am not going to deal with or tolerate.


It's called learning from you mistake

febby
ofcourse the cap guy will try to redeem himself, but it will be much more in an indirect way(not in words, he will show it in his actions). And if the girl wants to show that she is still interested in him, then she directly has to tell him face to face that " ok you dont have to worry, its ok, i still love you". then after this he will try be more affectionate towards you (may be some cappys wont be able to express thier affection)and will definitely be cautious not to make that mistake again.

and by the way cap girl i was not dissappeared, i was just a bit busy. And ya branh i m not trying to gain any sympathy, if u feel that way, then its ok i dont care.

branh u too interuptive n very much wrong here, u shouldnt be speakin about gender in this board... get a gender board..go to some other board.. i dont even know y the hell u r in this board.. trust me i m a typical capricorn guy and i know how a cap guy is. i have even read many books about caps and most oftenly they r that way, your
grand pa must be exceptional case(the effect of the saturn must be less, when your grandpa was born.)

U know what branh i dont want to argue with u

I know u wont stop...I know people like u...keep on going..good luck

Which Cap men have been on here, and then left, because of our supposed ignorance or refusal to see the truth? Name them please. Mangoat isn't one... we all appreciated his thread and applauded him for it... JamesTate and OAF do not add anything to the discussion, so they don't count... There was some young Capguy21 or something, but I don't recall any women taking issue with what he had to say. No... I think it's just one single Virgo male who has inflitrated this Board, to spout off his female-bashing views, who is the target we're trying to run off here. There have been no others, Cap. or not, whom I can recall.

you know what brandon, maybe someone should find out who you work for, and tell them how much time, etc. you're stealing from them by being on this website during working hours. by the way, this site is for people who want and need to vent. we are here to support one another. it is not up to you what we vent about or how we vent. it is for unconditional understanding, fact finding, healing, and/or friendly banter. ridicule is acceptable when it is presented in a question..like why is the a $ $ hole brandon continually thinking he is god— is that clear enough for you or do you still feel the need to maintain your superiority over mankind (which is so obviously a error in judgement). wonder how all those people who gave you all those applause on the virgo site feel now, when they read how evil and judgemental you really are. if you don't like us, leave us. simple as that.

james tate, please come back and tell it like it is. i'm really missing your input and humor.

ya know, even though james tate's opinions are judgemental and razor sharp as well, they're usually very funny, which is just the opposite of brandon's style . so brandon, i suggest you go back and read alot of james's posts and learn from the master. yeah, go spend your time doing that.

Cappys are sensitive... and I assume most of you are Caps. You will discover the value of wisdom with time. I think what bran has been saying here is very poignant -- intelligent and relative to the subject at hand! Astrology is a psychological study. It's not all about the signs, aspects and houses. Sure, the guy has made a few generalizations, but no more than an astrologer would do for a chart. IF you don't like/respect what somebody is saying, don't feed into it (if it offends you). The world is a cold place. If anybody knows this, it's 'Capricorn'.

poignant? intelligent? i think you need to re-read his posts. or find him to give him a bj.

Thanks cappyguy, very helpful.

My cappy recently went out of town and didn't call me for three days (this is the 2nd time he has done this in 7 months). The funny thing is that he is always the one calling me! So I guess he needed some space or something? Well he called today and sounded distant and was treating me like a friend (my guess he that someone was listening to the conversation). I am more than happy to give him space, all he needs to do is ask....I totally adore this man and treat him like gold, he also adores me BUT why does he have such a hard time saying that? He shows me his feelings but he never says....I am afraid to drive him off by telling him how much I care....its silly, he should ne honored to be showered in so much love.

Thanks for the insight Cappyguy

....DISAGREE....
i seriously doubt laying the blame on women in general is a valid point. its a "people" issue. "people are a peculiar breed"..the quicker u get that, easier it is to understand "people" do wat the f--- they want. astrology just categorizes this. the sexes make it an even slimmer categorization but grouping nonetheless..assumptions.. Going with assumptions always ends up with you making an A-- of yourself. Things are wat they are and for the unfortunates who dont say wat they mean and mean wat they say..evidently have another program void of simplicity

Hopeless... You're entitled to your opinion, of couse, but I'm not putting any stock in it. Curious about you, I read a couple of your other posts in "For Brandon" thread... and well let's just say I'm not impressed. (Are people spelling in ebonics, now days??) People are complex, and things are not merely as they seem on the surface. As to whatever else you were saying above, I cannot extrapolate any other points made, so I'll leave it at that.

woooww..how presumptious of you capgirl but then again not at all surprising.. ohh but how audacious it is of u to stroke your ego with the fantasies that i post commments in hopes of earning your liking..that in itself insinuates my acknowledgement of your identity which i have by NO MEANS done. on a lighter note i suggest you aim your shots at someone a tad more tuned to your wavelength and just a tip: next time u have an insatiable desire for feeble attempts to belittle a stranger..go for somethin a bit more entertaining than condescension..soo cliche

haha-- That was an all too obvious attempt to use as many B-I-G words as possible, even if out of context, in one long run-on sentence. I will heed your advice though and limit my interaction to those with competency in grammar and vocabulary. Thanks for the tip.

Derail....In west, range cows are cookiemonsters. They need minerals, namely magnesium to calm their central nervous system and need to attack everything that crosses their path, if dont respond to medication, they'll even attack their own babies, that is when they need to be culled.

:O

Huh? Range cow? LOL

Brahn- whatever. It's clear to me where the problems lie here. I'm not here for this kind of debate.