I love this board!

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CapGirl
@CapGirl
20 Years1,000+ Posts

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I mean the women on it, of course! Isn't it funny how we have these chats here daily, weekly? I feel like I have a secret world/life. I wonder what the purpose, meaning is behind our coming together here and supporting one another? It can't be just idle time wasted to commiserate and obsess over one man in our life (the tormenting CAP)... There has to be something bigger, some higher purpose going on.

Just being a bit "deep" tonight! Anyway, I'm very glad to have the support in my life from Pathfinder, and to have these chats w/ MyCap, GEG, Wheretomylady, Scorpionlady, and even you APW ; ) and the newcomer, MCShaker!

Happy early Valentine's Day! May your Caps. shower you with ... phone calls!! haha

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MyCap
@MyCap
20 Years

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LOL CapGirl...

It's funny, I was just thinking yesterday out of the blue, how I'm so addicted to checking/replying/reading on this website of the people who are going thru the same things as I am, and how they have a board set up on the net for us to all share these things. It's great! I have enjoyed all the advice, and everything that I've received on here from all the great ladies, and especially from brahn(LOL). It's really helped me a lot w/my cap. Of course, still wishing that things were different w/him, but oh well. I'm really down tonite about the whole situation, so I'm not being very positive. But I don't want to ruin a happy post, so that's all the negativity I'm going to add to this.

Happy early valentine's day to you also. Wish I was spending it with the cap (wait, I'm supposed to be positive!)

Thanks again ladies!
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greeneyedgemini
@greeneyedgemini
20 Years500+ Posts

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Good evening ladies~

yes these boards are wonderful arent they.... and to anser your question CAPGIRL~ "there has to be something bigger, some higher purpose going on." There is, its GOD hes in charge and every thing happens for a reason. 😉 have you noticed that none of us has gotten upset with eachother... its like we all recieve the info given but we do not judge what one says or has to offer... its wonderful... I dont know about you but in person....if one of my friends or family tried to talk to me about these issues I probably would get angry or upset maybe even defensive...but for some reason here is where i feel comfortable, and I meeting new people total strangers from all over, and it makes me feel good if maybe i have written something somewhere that has touched somones heart for that day, moment or second... If for one second I can make somone happy or have FAITH I feel like my job for the day is done, i feel like a better person....


Mycap~

I know its hard sweetie but like I have said you have to have faith, do not let that negative energy in... it will keep you down, let it go think postive ask the Lord for sweet dreams with him... I mean if you cant be with him in person, what other way to be with him then in your dreams... I often time pray for sweet dreams with Brian and when I wake up in the morning i feel wonderful LIke i was with him all along... helps me through the day!!

Us ladies will be fine I promise....just keep the prayers coming!!!!


love to you,
Brandy

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mcshaker
@mcshaker
19 Years

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CapGirl - I couldn't agree more! Be it because of Cap men...or not...it's just great and I am very happy to have lended here. Hey! You even make me improve my English - COMMISERATE - will look it up 🙂,,,

You seem in a dandy mood tonight and I am happy about that...

...Still no news...still regret saying what I said...OUPS! Forgot...let's go to bed positive everybody!

Talk to you all soon and goodnight! MC
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CapGirl
@CapGirl
20 Years1,000+ Posts

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MyCap~ What's been happening since the "sleep-over" last weekend? I'm feeling discouraged as well...IM'd him the other night, no response, but told him to call if he wants to drop by this week. I do not want to have to chase him down and call too. And this is moving too slow...I start putting deadlines on hearing from him and thinking of "closing things down" once and for all when he turns up weeks from now. I just don't know if I have the patience to deal w/ him, on any level... 😢

MC~ "Commiserate"... Ca veut dire...parler, rire, et pleurer ensemble des choses comme les hommes, l'amour...

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anotherpisceswoman
@anotherpisceswoman
19 YearsPisces

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thanks capgirl i appreciate the "even you APW" I know i know, I keep saying I'm the negative one around here, i guess after awhile i just get tired of all the bs and it isn't just the cap guys it's some(Not all) guys and some of their bs. we all seem like loving caring women and sometimes it's just so hard to "get" that just because we are, there are people(men and women) who take that for granted and use and abuse it. that's why these posts are so important, a lot of support and caring here, i think these boards are great also, they give me hope or at least somewhere to turn when i'm in "the dark place" thanks to all of you too
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Scorpionlady
@Scorpionlady
20 Years1,000+ Posts

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Good Morning Ladies,

I hope everyone of you are doing well, and feelig good today. We all know that the big V day is coming and I for one is not looking forward to it. I think back last year when I met my Cappy it was nine months into our friendship and I was over his house on V Day, I got to talking and saying that I have never gotten flowers on V Day and then he got up and went to the bedroom and brought out a V Day Card that read Althought our lives keeps us very busy and apart you will always have a special place in my heart and he signed it and under his name he put a heart and an arrow through it and said for me to figure it out..I did not look much into I gave him a hug and a kiss said thank you and keep talking but as I think about it know dang he must was feeling a sista back then. I was surprised to get something from him hell it has only been 9 months I don't normally expect anything from a man so early on.

We are both very busy him in the Remodeling Construction/Home Improvement and me in Medical Cancer Research/Phlebotomist, keeps us very busy around this time of the year. I do a lot of Health Fairs on the weekends and he is doing home improvement so a lot of our moments together were in the evening after we both got finish working.

And here it is a another V Day and I am feeling that this could be the time that he actually expresses his feelings, I am thinking probably not in so many words but his actions will probably say it more. What will I do if it does not happen. Nothing because I cannot allow my self to fall deep into that feeling. this thought was on my mind and I don't want to obeses over it so I am putting it out there to get it off my mind. LOL

He knows I don't expect anything from him he knows that I will never ask him for anything and he knows how I feel about him. On Feb 23 it will be 2 months and one week since I last saw him. Dang that is a long time. I know he is coming back, I just know it. I am his best friend, and I believe in giving people their space when they need it, and because I know that is how he is, thats make being apart from him easy and hard sometimes. I don't feel the need to call him I cannot do that, again my pride and ego won't let me do that again...still feeling good about the last thing I said to him.

I just believe that since these men are not good at expressing their feelings verbally that V Day will be a good day for them to show it, if you think about it that way their actions can speak for them. I am not saying get excited and all nor am I trying to get any of you to believe that you will see your Cappy on V Day I am just saying that is something to think about or something that I have been thinking about.

I thought for a moment one time that he have until V Day and if I don't hear from him before then I was gone for good..No answering the phone if he calls just shutting him completely out, I still feel that at least my mind but my heart and my gut instincts keeps telling me he will be back and I will prevail. LOL

I will always beleive that people come in your life for a reason a season or a life time and I have been through all the seasons with this man and know I need to find out if he is around for a reason or a life time.

So with that ladies I want to say have a good day, and remmember:

YOU ARE TO BLESSED TO BE STRESSED
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CapGirl
@CapGirl
20 Years1,000+ Posts

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Good stuff, SL. ("musta been feeling a sista"- Love that!!!)

I think I am being honest in saying that VDay has no effect or bearing upon me as to my Cap. I say that bc. I don't think we have a relationship established and can't even begin thinking about VDay and "its pressures" applying. Maybe I am too black and white, and need things concrete and spelled out, so I feel that he and I have nothing between us right now... and these guys can't communicate. To me, if he's thinking that he owes me any VDay attention, he's really delusional. I just want reliable attention on a weekly basis; screw that damm Hallmark holiday! 😉 (Am I pissing all over my happy thread?? Sorry!)

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pathfinder
@pathfinder
20 Years1,000+ Posts

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I hope you all don't think I'm corny with this but,

@}-'-,-'-,--- @}-'-,-'-,--- @}-'-,-'-,--- @}-'-,-'-,---
@}-'-,-'-,--- @}-'-,-'-,--- @}-'-,-'-,--- @}-'-,-'-,---
@}-'-,-'-,--- @}-'-,-'-,--- @}-'-,-'-,--- @}-'-,-'-,---
@}-'-,-'-,--- @}-'-,-'-,--- @}-'-,-'-,--- @}-'-,-'-,---

A dozen long-stem American Beauty roses to you all! (I wish they were real, you deserve them!) CapGirl is right, you ladies are making a positive difference in my life.
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taurus36
@taurus36
19 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 31 · Topics: 2
Hey ladies!!

I'm new to the board. I like this board a lot!! Great advice. I would like to give my take on Cap men. I dated 3 in the last 6 years. We all know that Cap men take FOREVER to have create a relationship with you. I understand why they do it. They have to be sure of the person they are getting involved with and I mean SURE. These men hold a lot of secrets. They disappear for a number of reasons:

Because they are confused and afraid
They have other obligations (other women or woman)
they are so consumed with work (WORKAHOLICS BIGTIME!!)
or there finances are shaky. Cap me love money and many times, them not having enough will keep them singles for a long time. They have to make sure that they can provide for the object of there affection.

Never take anything a Cap man does personally. NEVER. It's not about you, but it is, if that makes sense. They expect the woman to understand taht things come up and that they have money to make and jobs to work. You are important to him, but not the way you think you are. Meaning, he will have deep feelings for you, but until he SAYS that he wants to be WITH YOU exclusively, there is not much you can do. I advise many women that are dealing with Cap men to keep pressing forward and keep doing your thang! Learn how to cut them off without letting them go. This was a very hard for me to do becuase when these knuckleheads disappear, they leave for extended periods of time and yoo've missed them so much that by the time they come back you totally forget about what pissed you off in the first place. (TYPICAL of Cap men - that's what they want you to do Forget about it!) NEVER bring up the past with a cap man. They have such forgiving hearts that if they forgive you adn if they ain't talking about it, let it go. They expect the same from you. One last thing, you have to pick your times with Caps. You can't just blurt out your feelings. You have to know WHEN to say what's on your mind and when NOT to. You see these men are calculating and you have to somehow learn how to think like them. Flip the script SOMETIMES, not all the time. Keep it fresh, shake it up a little. Why? becuase these men are so routine oriented that when they get off track it drives them crazy! They ain't going anywhere.

Not being available all the time works wonders with these men. They hate it when they can't reach you! They hate it! They will come looking for you trust me! These men like to know that you do love them, but sometimes you have to let them know that the world doesn't revolve around them all the time.

I have had my share of ups and downs with these men and i am very perceptive. I say if you can handle it and wait it out with these men and THEY HAVE TO TRUST THAT YOU ARE GOING TO BE THERE 100% and then they will start to show you that they care and love you. IT will be worth it. If you can ever get one to settle, you've got man, provider, sex partner and friend.

I hope this gives so insight about these men. I love em, but I need a change of scenary now and then. LOL!! Just PLEASE learn how to cut them off PLEASE. Always be kind but firm. No need to argue just be firm in your convictions and make him respect YOU! They will adjust TRUST ME!

God bless you all!

Taurus36
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Scorpionlady
@Scorpionlady
20 Years1,000+ Posts

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I just have to tell this one...I am from DC and I was on 70 bus during my lunch hour. If any of you are from DC you would now about the 70 bus So I get off the bus and Channel 5 news was out there and they wanted to talk to me about bus bunching. I was like sure you can talk to me...they turned on the camera and the tape started rolling.

So I will be on the news at 5pm today...I love it, it really made my day. LOL LOL....

Some times things happen in your life just to cheer you up and that did it, I feel really good right know.
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MyCap
@MyCap
20 Years

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CapGirl~~

U asked what has happened since the sleepover on Sun nite/Monday. Well not too much. I've pretty much just talked on the phone to him. He's actually called. But on Tues nite when I talked to him he almost acted as if he wanted to see me, but never asked me. I thought of asking him over, but talked myself out of it. Anyhow, last nite he was still off work (has to go back today) and so I called him to see if he wanted to come over, see me or what. Well he didnt answer, and never called me back. So I had a little conversation with myself last nite (LOL), and told myself that I was doing so fine with the way things were before I made the stupid mistake of going over there Sunday nite. So I told myself to not answer his call, I figured he'd call back today for sure, and that I'd just go on and forget him. Well he calls around noon today. I didn't answer, but I did end up calling him back. He asked what I was doing, said he wanted to know if I wanted to come over for lunch. I said why. Just was weird to me and asked him if there was some alterior motive for me coming over (SEX?). He said no, but I told him I didn't want to come over. Told him I was in a bad mood. I was because his @ss didn't bother calling me back. He kept trying to get out of me as to why I was in a bad mood, but I told him not to worry about it. I'm sure he knew tho. I didn't want to talk about it w/him either. So we talked for a while, he was getting ready to head to work and that was that. HE can be so d@mn confusing. I don't know what he wants, or what he's trying to do here. This confuses me on the part of whether I should move on from him or not.
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greeneyedgemini
@greeneyedgemini
20 Years500+ Posts

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I think you sould have joined him for lunch.. it was an offering... I think I would have asked for him to meet somewhere close by & that way there would be no other "motives" lol but you would walk away having a nice time seeing him and he can walk away wanting more of you!!! lol

im so happy today ladies

Im having my daughters 7th b-day party at the girly store at the mall... libby lu!! Shes sooooo excited!!
ha ha

hey did you know you could put pictures on here!! I did it and I put a picture of me and B...lol

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MyCap
@MyCap
20 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 305 · Topics: 17
GEG, No I didn't know we could put pics on here. Interesting!! I hope u have fun at ur daughter's bday party!

I prob should have joined him for lunch. He didn't have too much time tho because he had to be at work. But I think the reason why I didn't join him was just because I felt like he always sees me on his time and not mine, and I just wasn't in the mood for that today. After seeing him for our overnite Sunday it just kind of made me think about the whole situation a little more, or it brought the reality of it to me maybe. I just have to figure out what I really want and what his motive is in this. He ends it one day because of the drunken call, pretty much says we won't talk again, and then now we are back to this. Confusing to me really.
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greeneyedgemini
@greeneyedgemini
20 Years500+ Posts

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Awww thank you so much Capgirl for such a beautiful comment, Im sure you are just as gorgeous!!! These picture things are fun, although Im just waiting for someone to say...."hey thats my goat" LOL j/k!!!

MYCAP~ these men are confusing...lol I often wonder if they think the same of us 😉!! lol

Today Im in a glorious mood, My daughters party at club libby lu was a blast the girl's had so much fun dressing up, getting their hair and makeup done and their nails!! (she is turning 7 on the 13) it was sooo much fun, I took lots of picures for round two of her party tonight... we are having a sleepover / scrapbooking party full of chips, A real barbie cake, pizza and a whole lot of "SPRITE" lol no caffine!! I will probably no all the words to Lizzy Maguire movies.... sooo sweeet... then saturday she has finding Nemo on ICE!! then sunday we are going to see curious George @ the movies... so we have a jammed packed weekend.. I know its sounds like she is spoild...she not really, just wanted to make this Birthday One that she remembers...she had a rough YEAR 😢 with the divorce and all.... BUt along wiht her "special PArty" last night she had all her freinds and grandmas there to watch her get her ears pierced for the first time!!! 🙂 she was a champ!!! anyhoo Im so happy inside....he he can you tell?


have a wonderful weekend everyone

love, brandy / geg