When caps need time...?

When cap men say they need time when things are ok, how much time so they usually need?

When cap men say they need time or when things are a little awkward, how much time do they need?

Do they just usually want to talk things out eventually? Or is it possible that they will just avoid the awkward conversation?

Posted by Ang
When cap men say they need time when things are ok, how much time so they usually need?

When cap men say they need time or when things are a little awkward, how much time do they need?

Do they just usually want to talk things out eventually? Or is it possible that they will just avoid the awkward conversation?

Is he busy with something? Us Caps (or least for me) if things are great, may a few days or a week. It all depends on what is awkward. But a week or so. Talking things out is great for us because we tend to handle so much on our own and feel that we burden others with our issues. Make him feel comfortable about the situation and he will slowly but surely open up and talk about it. At least that is how I am. Maybe he is the same way.

The elephant in the room is we both agreed to be in a serious relationship although never officially talked about the bf gf title. but after 2 months into it he said he can't seem to give up dating other people. It took me by surprise and we didn't have a conclusion last time we talked. He said he wanted to break it off with me because otherwise I would get hurt.

I just wanted to tell him I still want to give this a try and I am ok with him keeping his dating active while seeing me.

I know he's active on skout a phone app that lets u chat with random people. Also noticed he has ok Cupid a Dating site profile but he deactivated it on Tuesday.

Do caps really spend this away time alone?

Ang,

I know it's hard and you sound like you really like/love this guy. I totally agree with Ellessque. But if says that he doesn't want to stop dating other people, you have to take him at his word. Listen to what he said, you know? Sometimes we women want to hear what we want to hear instead of what is being said. In order to understand him more, you must accept this answers that he has given you even if you don't like them. You can't push a man into a relationship if he is truly not ready and it sounds like (I could be wrong) that is not quite ready yet. Like Ellessque said, if you continue to see him you will not be a priority of his. You want to be someone's priority, not their option. Know what I mean? 🙂

After 2 months he realized that you are not "the one". Take what those above have said at face value, you are not his priority. Reality is, you will most likely never be...

first of all I want to thank everyone for your input. I understand that I should be moving on completely and not here still thinking about possibilities that perhaps don't exist. However, the truth is I have been keeping my options open as well.

During the 2 months that we have been seeing each other, I have maintained contact with my other possibilities, I just have not spent time with them in person as much. There has been constant texting between me and my other possibilites. No physical relationship at all, just harmless dinners and flirtatious texts and conversations at dinners. This is the only reason why I think I will be ok with being in a not commited relationship since I have been all along and him too.

The choice for me is clear, I will drop every man out there if he is for sure feeling the same way. but even when I thought he saw us as being exclusive I still didn't cut all ties with other guys. I do like him a lot because we are so compatible and we can talk about everything but I guess I have my issues as well. And by issues I mean not being able to open up easily and not trusting guys as much as I used to when I was 17. And because I think I can really do this as long as I have other people in my life to keep me occupied, I just want to let him know that if he still has interest in seeing me, we should not stop doing what's been making both of us happy.

I wouldn't have believed that I am capable of this but I guess it just has been too much of hanging on to that "dating one at a time" idea for too long and I just lost hope and don't think I will meet anyone who really dates one at a time any time soon.

So, with that in mind...if anyone is still willing to give me any input it would be greatly appreicated on how to at least approach him and let him know. Thanks again 🙂

Posted by Caplove

Posted by Ang


And because I think I can really do this as long as I have other people in my life to keep me occupied, I just want to let him know that if he still has interest in seeing me, we should not stop doing what's been making both of us happy.

Hi Ang! 🙂 I think you've been given A LOT of great advice here and I'm basically going to say the same thing.

Know that if he still has any interest in seeing you, rest assured he WILL pursue you and keep contacting you. To answer your question, you won't NEED to let him know anything. For me, when any man says that he "needs time" or wants to "take a break" it's just a big red flag that the interest is not high enough for him.

My rationale is that when any man says this, he's willing to take the RISK of you dating other men and allowing another man the chance to swoop in and steal you away. That's why many people keep their options totally open in the beginning of relationships and date others. We are unsure and testing out the waters, which is totally fine.

But the thing is, if you've dated for a few months and he's telling you he needs time he does not have the level of interest that's needed to take it to the next level. In addition, even if you WERE okay with him "needing time" and still want to go out with him you are putting yourself in a strange position. It'll be you trying to convince HIM why he should keep dating you even when he's said he needs time. It should not be like that, he should be 100% interested and not 20% interested.


If his interest isn't high enough then he'll most likely drop out of the race eventually (which might be what he's trying to do here).

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+1000 agree with Caplove