Yup, I'm venting!!!

Allright, so Guys can be so LAME at times, seriously! What is with that? I was talking to that scorp/sag on IM yesterday just b/c we were initially planning to meet up again on the w/e of the 27th and I wanted to know where he had decided on meeting up. I said to him he could come down (which is a 2 hour train ride) or I'd have to go to the city (which is a 3 hour train ride). And then I said, you know, we'd have more time together if he came down since it is a shorter ride. So he said that he'd have to look up the cost and stuff, which is fine b/c it'll be an issue for both of us. So then he goes, "when do you want to meet up"? At this point I'm like mega pissed! I was like WTF, I thought we had sorta planned on the 27th. Anyways, so I threw the question back AT him. And this is what pisses me off-the fact that he's not taking the initiative. Bloody, if you are interested, take the damn initiative to plan things out. Don't just be like "oh, when do you want to meet up and where and yada yada". Have a backbone for Christ's sake!!!! Anyways, so it was decided that he'd let me know by the end of the w/e, will have to wait and see WHAT he decides on....urghhh, so pissed off at him right now! Thanks for letting me vent, LOL.

speaking of no backbone or not being able to decide easily. any libra placement? whats his mercury sign. i wasn't following..

Yup, Venus AND Mars in Libra! Mercury is in Sag while moon is in Cancer. Sorry, perhaps I'm just pissed and sound all giberish in my venting....but that's how I feel🙂

*gibberish

Sounds like he's waiting for payday and didn't quite budget right this month.
Surely I hope that money is not that insecure of an issue for him.
Sometimes its hard to figure out what you will not tell your girlfriends was lame or not up to expectation😢
But it is time he mans up. It seems as if ya'll have been talking long enough for him to kind of know the direction towards what you are interested in. I think.

EXACTLY SuperCap!!! His nonchalant ways are getting to me. Time for an honest open discussion about this all. If he doesn't "man up", well, I can't take that. Thanks ya'll for your comments. 🙂

sarasa.... venus in libra?..bad bad..is he your boyfriend or are u both just dating?

no, we've only been on one date so far....so nothing exclusive. And why is venus in libra bad? I heard it's good except they are people pleasers and that makes them look aloof and unconcerned.

OH that's so you Evan!🙂

Venus in Libra is the good part.
Mars in Libra is not a big help for Merc in Sag in matters of seeming constant.
Merc in Sag means crazy like me. We make one step to the East one step to the West. We want to explore, we change mind and want to be uncontrolled etc etc.
Moon in Cancer? well maybe he stares too much his coins while staying home enjoying its intimacy.


dating is nothing simple. it gets into nerves. often. but we have to go through it. we need each other.

Oh Noooo ... You're already on the venting thread stage. No way Sarasa!

Posted by DwellingOnMove
Venus in Libra is the good part.
Mars in Libra is not a big help for Merc in Sag in matters of seeming constant.
Merc in Sag means crazy like me. We make one step to the East one step to the West. We want to explore, we change mind and want to be uncontrolled etc etc.
Moon in Cancer? well maybe he stares too much his coins while staying home enjoying its intimacy.


dating is nothing simple. it gets into nerves. often. but we have to go through it. we need each other.

Maybe that's why most of his relationships have been 3/4 months long?? Idk. I have my Mars in Libra as well but my Merc in Capricorn. He's supposed to let me know today, about our "next plans". So we shall see hwat he does. I'm thinking he'll email instead of picking up the damn phone and calling!

Posted by Rays Heart
Oh Noooo ... You're already on the venting thread stage. No way Sarasa!

hahahah, yes Ray!!! It's kinda sad but that's where it's at right now. Will see how it goes. Atleast I know what it is that bothers me at the moment!

A fire sign could suit you better in that sense. Someone with strong Libra influence like him, could be a bit too considerate for you. He may look for your approval a bit too much when making decisions and not everybody likes that.

Posted by sarasa
Allright, so Guys can be so LAME at times, seriously! What is with that? I was talking to that scorp/sag on IM yesterday just b/c we were initially planning to meet up again on the w/e of the 27th and I wanted to know where he had decided on meeting up. I said to him he could come down (which is a 2 hour train ride) or I'd have to go to the city (which is a 3 hour train ride). And then I said, you know, we'd have more time together if he came down since it is a shorter ride. So he said that he'd have to look up the cost and stuff, which is fine b/c it'll be an issue for both of us. So then he goes, "when do you want to meet up"? At this point I'm like mega pissed! I was like WTF, I thought we had sorta planned on the 27th. Anyways, so I threw the question back AT him. And this is what pisses me off-the fact that he's not taking the initiative. Bloody, if you are interested, take the damn initiative to plan things out. Don't just be like "oh, when do you want to meet up and where and yada yada". Have a backbone for Christ's sake!!!! Anyways, so it was decided that he'd let me know by the end of the w/e, will have to wait and see WHAT he decides on....urghhh, so pissed off at him right now! Thanks for letting me vent, LOL.

Sarsa 😄!!!! Hey lady ^_^.


Umm, did he really moan and groan about the cost of saying you? Are you serious? If he wanted to say you, it should matter really, in my opinion. The reason I say this is because if you go up to see if, aren't you loosing money too? I mean, I don't get it. Its okay for you to lose money but when it comes to him, he has to do 'calculations'? Good grief! I'd be pissed off too ...

Posted by Rays Heart
A fire sign could suit you better in that sense. Someone with strong Libra influence like him, could be a bit too considerate for you. He may look for your approval a bit too much when making decisions and not everybody likes that.

Hey Ray! In my opinion, the only "fireness" I can handle is Sagittarius! For eg: I was talking to this other guy and he was already pissing the crap outta me. I look up his chart and gosh, you should've seen all the Aries in his chart. No wonder I was so bloody annoyed with him. But for some reason, I was attracted to him to. I have no idea why....

Posted by cappysweetie

Posted by sarasa
Allright, so Guys can be so LAME at times, seriously! What is with that? I was talking to that scorp/sag on IM yesterday just b/c we were initially planning to meet up again on the w/e of the 27th and I wanted to know where he had decided on meeting up. I said to him he could come down (which is a 2 hour train ride) or I'd have to go to the city (which is a 3 hour train ride). And then I said, you know, we'd have more time together if he came down since it is a shorter ride. So he said that he'd have to look up the cost and stuff, which is fine b/c it'll be an issue for both of us. So then he goes, "when do you want to meet up"? At this point I'm like mega pissed! I was like WTF, I thought we had sorta planned on the 27th. Anyways, so I threw the question back AT him. And this is what pisses me off-the fact that he's not taking the initiative. Bloody, if you are interested, take the damn initiative to plan things out. Don't just be like "oh, when do you want to meet up and where and yada yada". Have a backbone for Christ's sake!!!! Anyways, so it was decided that he'd let me know by the end of the w/e, will have to wait and see WHAT he decides on....urghhh, so pissed off at him right now! Thanks for letting me vent, LOL.

Sarsa 😄!!!! Hey lady ^_^.


Umm, did he really moan and groan about the cost of saying you? Are you serious? If he wanted to say you, it should matter really, in my opinion. The reason I say this is because if you go up to see if, aren't you loosing money too? I mean, I don't get it. Its okay for you to lose money but when it comes to him, he has to do 'calculations'? Good grief! I'd be pissed off too ...

click to expand

Well, he just mentioned about the cost once. But yeh, I think he wanted it to be fair. Last time we both had to spend money to get to Philly. This time I prefer he come down b/c for one, I'm still looking for a job while he has one already. And two, it just made logical sense that if he came down (it's a shorter train ride), we'd have more time together. Instead of both of us having to go to NYC. I don't know, guys sometimes don't use their fat ass brains! It's like dude, if we both meet up in NYC and say that you will drvie there (b/c he can't take the NJ Transit for whatever the heck reason), wouldn't you have to consider pa

Sory, it got cut off....

It's like dude, if we both meet up in NYC and say that you will drvie there (b/c he can't take the NJ Transit for whatever the heck reason), wouldn't you have to consider parking costs? Not to mention the hassle of driving in NYC? See what I mean? Anyways, so I'm still waiting for him to get back to me. If he says he can't come down, well then, he'll just have to wait to see me. Unless if I can come up with a cheaper way to go to NYC. Or we'll just have to meet up in Philly again. So, Idk. It's Sunday night and he hasn't gotten back to me as yet. So, I have no idea what's going on with him.....basically, I'm not calling or emailing no more, if he wants to see me soon, HE can call and let me know what the whole deal is....

"In my opinion, the only "fireness" I can handle is Sagittarius! For eg: I was talking to this other guy and he was already pissing the crap outta me. I look up his chart and gosh, you should've seen all the Aries in his chart. No wonder I was so bloody annoyed with him. But for some reason, I was attracted to him to. I have no idea why...."

It could be the fire that attracks you. Initiatives comes naturally to fire signs. Libra is not the best at making decisions.

Posted by sarasa
Sory, it got cut off....

It's like dude, if we both meet up in NYC and say that you will drvie there (b/c he can't take the NJ Transit for whatever the heck reason), wouldn't you have to consider parking costs? Not to mention the hassle of driving in NYC? See what I mean? Anyways, so I'm still waiting for him to get back to me. If he says he can't come down, well then, he'll just have to wait to see me. Unless if I can come up with a cheaper way to go to NYC. Or we'll just have to meet up in Philly again. So, Idk. It's Sunday night and he hasn't gotten back to me as yet. So, I have no idea what's going on with him.....basically, I'm not calling or emailing no more, if he wants to see me soon, HE can call and let me know what the whole deal is....

awwww sarsa ..., I don't blame you at all. Seriously, that would drive me nuts. I'm not sure what the deal is either. So he's a libra? Usually Libra men aren't that difficult :/

Posted by Rays Heart
"In my opinion, the only "fireness" I can handle is Sagittarius! For eg: I was talking to this other guy and he was already pissing the crap outta me. I look up his chart and gosh, you should've seen all the Aries in his chart. No wonder I was so bloody annoyed with him. But for some reason, I was attracted to him to. I have no idea why...."

It could be the fire that attracks you. Initiatives comes naturally to fire signs. Libra is not the best at making decisions.

Well, he's not a libran. He's a Scorp/Sag cuspian. He's got his venus and mars in libra and that's about it.

Posted by cappysweetie

Posted by sarasa
Sory, it got cut off....

It's like dude, if we both meet up in NYC and say that you will drvie there (b/c he can't take the NJ Transit for whatever the heck reason), wouldn't you have to consider parking costs? Not to mention the hassle of driving in NYC? See what I mean? Anyways, so I'm still waiting for him to get back to me. If he says he can't come down, well then, he'll just have to wait to see me. Unless if I can come up with a cheaper way to go to NYC. Or we'll just have to meet up in Philly again. So, Idk. It's Sunday night and he hasn't gotten back to me as yet. So, I have no idea what's going on with him.....basically, I'm not calling or emailing no more, if he wants to see me soon, HE can call and let me know what the whole deal is....

awwww sarsa ..., I don't blame you at all. Seriously, that would drive me nuts. I'm not sure what the deal is either. So he's a libra? Usually Libra men aren't that difficult :/

click to expand

Nope, he's not a libran. He's a Scorp/Sag Cuspian. BTW: He never got back to me. Kinda strange since he's always been true to his words. Oh well...

Actually sarasa, maybe he's got all tied up this weekend. So don't lose hope on him yet.

Sarasa 😄!

Did you hear from him yet——? Don't stay away, I wanna know, what happened? Are you meeting on the 27th?

Let's see. It's Monday morning and he still hasn't gotten back to me yet. No phone, no email, no nothing. I'm just going to wait for him to get back to me. If he doesn't in the week's time, I'll let him know that I can't deal with his unconcerned attitude on all of this🙂

Sagigoat:

Yes, Arieans piss the crap out of me, seriously! But for some weird reason, I attract and get attracted to them at the sametime. Must be my moon in Sag, I'm beginning to think that the Moon in one's chart plays a bigger role in shaping your personality than how much I had initially thought.

Caps sometimes get irritated with this issues. Happens when:

- You dont listen to them properly when they talk about something important, you have to be 100% flawless in this situations, and they will not tell you again.
- You have to make some decisions because they make most of them and expect some decisions from you from the heart, and never obligated.

I am Pisces, and for me this things are minor, theres much more to life then this little things. Things must go with the flow, never judge another person for minor things.

"Well, he's not a libran. He's a Scorp/Sag cuspian. He's got his venus and mars in libra and that's about it."


Oh I know (even though I made it sound like he is a libra lol), he has strong libra influence, with venus and mars in libra his approach to relationship and drive could be very Libra.

Posted by LostPisces
Caps sometimes get irritated with this issues. Happens when:

- You dont listen to them properly when they talk about something important, you have to be 100% flawless in this situations, and they will not tell you again.
- You have to make some decisions because they make most of them and expect some decisions from you from the heart, and never obligated.

I am Pisces, and for me this things are minor, theres much more to life then this little things. Things must go with the flow, never judge another person for minor things.

Yes, all the above is true. But he does listen when I talk. He does remember minute little things that I may have randomly said jokingly. However, I don't want me making all the decisions. The issue here is that-IF he is interested in taking it forward, HE has to SHOW it. I can't be running him down. And if it is a long distance thing, I think plans have to be made atleast a week in advance. He can't just be going with the flow like he does with his buddies. I still haven't heard from him, not that I care at the moment since I have bigger fish to fry!🙂

Posted by Rays Heart
"Well, he's not a libran. He's a Scorp/Sag cuspian. He's got his venus and mars in libra and that's about it."


Oh I know (even though I made it sound like he is a libra lol), he has strong libra influence, with venus and mars in libra his approach to relationship and drive could be very Libra.

Hey Ray!🙂 Yes, his relationship approach maybe very Libra like. And at first I thought, maybe it's not so bad since I have my Mars in Libra too. But my Venus in Scorp/Sag doesn't like his Libraness. It's "nice" (and that's what he's getting at) to be considerate and all but dammit, take some action here. lol

Posted by Shaks
yeah, get yourself someone with strong Leo influence 😛 you know you want it hehe 😉 and you most certainly can handle it!

Im glad the only Libra I have is my rising..pfff!!

Oh Evan! Too much Leo = Too much Drama, trust me on that one, I have two close people in my life with that, lol. And yeh, I guess I can handle it unlike the Aries. Idk why but all of the Arieans that I've come across so far have pissed me off like no otehr sign, lol.

So, an update-he hasn't gotten in touch with me after last Friday. Neither have I. I think my pride won't let me. Afterall, he had said that he'd get in touch. Anyways, what's bugging me is not knowing what happened? I'm sitting here thinking through all possibilities, even the worst case being that he lost interest in me for whatever reason and doesn't want to take it no more. But I don't know if that's what it is b/c it doesn't quite fit in with how he'd been so far. So, what gives? I'm so lost. A guy disappeared on me like never before, it's so odd and it's bugging the crap out of me....What should I do, what should I do? I'm not initiating contact but I wanna know what happened. Hmmmm....

ummmm and how do you think I should go about it? If I do plan on doing so.

I seriously think he chickened out, lol. I am thinking of sending him a text like "Hey stranger! hope you're doing well" hahahah. Hmmmm....idk, his attitude has been VERY weird. I don't want to chase, definitely not. And if we were talking for over a month now, I feel like for him to just disappear like that w/out any reason is just plain ODD. Don't you think so?

Posted by DwellingOnMove

Moon in Cancer? well maybe he stares too much his coins while staying home enjoying its intimacy.

Haha, that's funny. I'm a Cancer sun and collect/roll/deposit coins. For the OP, having a moon in Cancer means he won't want to be very confrontational, or say something that you might not like this early in the relationship. He would probably be fine doing whatever and didn't want to decide on something that you might not like. Just my thoughts.

Posted by domanb

Posted by DwellingOnMove

Moon in Cancer? well maybe he stares too much his coins while staying home enjoying its intimacy.

Haha, that's funny. I'm a Cancer sun and collect/roll/deposit coins. For the OP, having a moon in Cancer means he won't want to be very confrontational, or say something that you might not like this early in the relationship. He would probably be fine doing whatever and didn't want to decide on something that you might not like. Just my thoughts.

click to expand

OMG, yeh! That's so true. He's such a people pleaser that way. My only issue right now is that he disappeared on me and I fail to understand WHY.

Posted by sagigoat
well it depends on how often you im/talk ususally. maybe it's not that odd for him to be detached for a few days? (ok 4 days to be exact) maybe he wants to test a little to see whether you are interested enough to contact him if he does not? i dunno. tbh if i were a man i'd perfer a woman who can feel confident and comfortable enough to take initiatives whenever she feels like it coz it'd bore my tears out if i have to make the iniiatives all the time. every one needs some sweet suprises or encouragements sometimes, men or women. i'd personally think it's attractive for a women to be somewhat unapologetic just go ahead and do what she feels like it sometimes regardless how others think. it infact shows strengh and confidence.

dunno. it's just how i think.

maybe some male dxpers can tell us what they think (re women being unapologetic taking initiatives)

Thanks for the msg sagigoat. Part of me says I should and the other part says I shouldn't. But I've been busy lately that I haven't had much time to think about HIM. But every now and then, his actions baffle me! That's all🙂

So can I please get more input from the guys? I'd really like to know what you'd like? If I did contact him, would I look pushy? Pushy to move things forward? I mean, it is long distance (~200 miles). So, plans have to be made, you can't just get up one fine morning and say, "I just feel like taking off and seeing her today". I mean, that's fine once we've gotten to "that" stage of a relationship. But plans have to be made nonetheless. Am I being totally unreasonable here?

On the other hand, if I don't message him, I'm never goign to know what his deal is. And two, he's not going to think of it as much. Judging from how he's been and his own words, "I don't have any expectations from this dating site", it tells me that he may not be too serious about it. I mean he's only 25, guys that age are kinda immature to begin with. So, this is the part that confuses me. I don't want to message him and sound pushy but at the same time I don't want to make it sound like I don't care and that I'm not interested in moving things forward.

Gosh, dating is so bloody complicated! I knew there was a reason why I wasn't in it for so long!

So, I sent him a text last night saying "Hey Stranger! Long time no see, just thought I'd say Hi!". And he never responded. Weird, huh?

Posted by sagigoat
okay at this point i'd say let him go you have done your part checking on him. it's good that you did it to reach the final conclusion. if he comes back by the end of week with an explaination, ok, if not, end of this encounter. who knows, there may be million things happened to him. he may not be where he was a week ago.


btw, not sure where are all the INTELLIGENT, WISE and HELPFUL dxp MEN hiding when we are helpessly needing their help/opinions 😢 ?





😛

Yup, I figured this is it. If he wants to continue this and has a "valid" reason for acting like a jerk for so long, he'll get back to me. Otherwise, to hell with him, his loss, lol.

Posted by Shaks

One thing is clear here and that is, you two have totally different views on what the pace of getting to know one another/meet should be. My "guy sixth-sense" is telling me that this guy isnt as enthousiastic or fast as you about meeting simply because he feels you have (unintentionally!) sabotaged his primal need as a male to be THE CHASER in this whole thing (how he does that with all that indecisiveness..is still a mistery) since you are showing LOTS of initiative and expecting more speed than his nature is, he probably feels powerless in a sense and for a man to have a feeling that he's losing power..its a nightmare! (especially the unevolved ones 😛) thats why he's not responding at this moment, because he's feeling pushed to make a decision coming from YOUR INITIATIVE. Men, in the first stages of gettting to know a woman, mostly want to IMPRESS her, if he feels he hasnt impressed you enough with his manly-qualities, he'll start to lose interest.

Im not saying its all lost or you should give up on this guy, but whatever you do, stop contacting him ffs! the ball has been for a long time on his side of the court now, let him be th

Thanks Evan! Yup, not contacting him no more. This is it. He should be man enough to come and tell me even if he feels like I'm being pushy. But I guess he's one of those "unevolved" ones. Men....*shakes head*....

So just a contrast to this guy-

I have a friend on FB that I hadn't met in person before. He lives in the same city and a LONG time ago, as he was searching for someone with the same last name as mine, he came across my profile and just dropped a line/two (apparently my profile was open to ppl within my network and I didn't even know that:O). Anyways, we exchanged a few msges and that's that. Then, a few weeks ago, I got a message saying how it was a shame that we hadn't met up and gotten a bite to eat. We tried to set a date but things weren't working out at the moment. So, it got put away. Then, earlier this week, he sent another message asking if I wanted to go get something to eat since he was leaving the city in a few days. So, we ended up going someplace. Now, I don't even really know this guy. But guess what?! He's a total gentleman. He even insisted on paying my meal although I insisted on splitting up and that's what we eventually did. He invited me for a movie that he was going to watch with one of his friends but ofcourse I turned it out, besides I had something planned for the night. He thanked me for coming out and said he just wished I would've let him pay, hahahah.

But anyways, the point is-some guys are jerks and some are such sweethearts. Like another friend of mine says, you just have to learn how to separate the chaff from the wheat! Thanks ya'll for your comments🙂

Posted by Ike
use the law of attraction sarasa 😛

The law of attraction? Tell me more😛

I meant turned it down....typoes, sigh...

Posted by Shaks
*nods endlessly*

Thank god I belong to the latter category 😛

Oh yeh?😛 Well, I'd have to wait and see that for myself😛