Someone please help me understand Leo men??

There's a Leo guy that I've been friends with for over a year now. Most of it has been a phone/text relationship but we've been together a few times. When we met we were both married to cheating spouses and shared a lot of our experiences, complaints, heartbreak, etc. He likes to flirt and there's always been some attraction there but I never thought he was really that interested in me, more just having fun. He and his wife broke up a year ago and I am just now finalizing the split from my husband.

A few days ago I was feeling really down about relationships and venting to him about it and all of a sudden he shocked me by asking me what he would be to me once my husband and I are done. He kept asking me to tell him everything I thought about him and me together and I had no idea what to say because I really didn't think he felt that way. He also kept talking about him wanting to be "my man" and he told me a tiny bit about what he thought but mainly asked questions he had for me about how, why, if etc.

So my problem is this. I'm used to him only paying attention to me when the time is right. I have figured out if he has work to get done, etc. there is no talking to him and I've learned that its not personal that's just him. So mainly the reason I never thought he felt anything was because the few times he started showing it would be quickly followed by long periods of not much communication or at least a whole lot "cooler" attitude than what I had seen for that minute. I don't know how many times I've just thought "oh forget it he doesn't care."

So what am I supposed to think now? He goes on and on the other night about "us" It was getting late so i told him i would email to try and tell him what I thought and I did but he hasn't said anything else about it now and no answer to my emails. I'm back to waiting for the stars to align and him to feel like talking again I guess. Help!!! Is this normal for Leo men?

Well I sent him 2. First was kind of telling him little things about how I saw us being together like how I was wishing I could see him on his birthday because he had a terrible one last year (his wife moved out the night before), how I was jealous of a date he had gone out on with another girl awhile back, and a few compliments 🙂

The other was answering questions he asked me. Kind of hard to say quickly but some had to do with the fact he is younger than me and I told him that it doesn't matter to me but I wasn't sure how he felt about it and I did tell him that usually I'm all about emotions when it comes to relationships and I tend to kind of jump in and not always make good decisions so I liked the fact that he was asking thoughtful questions and we were talking about it. I also told him that he is important to me and that if he decided that this was too much for him just to be honest with me. I would still want to be his friend.

I'm still not sure if that's at all what he wanted to hear from me or if I really explained myself very well. I usually don't have any trouble expressing emotions but I'm so confused by him that I really haven't let myself spend much time thinking about him in that way because I didn't want to be chasing after someone that wasn't interested. I would have a much easier time if I felt a little more sure that this wasn't just a passing moment of boredom or loneliness on his part. I need consistency lol

I will say he is very cautious really thinks things through. I can understand him not wanting to show too much until he feels like I'm totally available and done with all of this mess with my ex. But...he started the conversation so where does he want me to go with this?

^^^^ thanks that helps to know. I definitely don't jump in and out of relationships! I'm usually either all in or nothing though and not someone who dates casually. Basically taking it slow isn't my nature. I need to kick myself repeatedly to breathe deep and not try and rush it. Very hard for me!

JustALeo:
So easy for you to say, haha. Ok 🙂 Actually that's why I made a point to say "I'd understand" was trying to be sure he didn't feel pressured. And now since you mentioned it I'm wondering how much older you've dated? My ex is younger than me and Leo is even younger but really it's not an issue for me because we get along well, he's smart, mature, etc. but he's said things from time to time that make me question if he really is ok with it or maybe it's just joking/teasing. Opinions about dating older women?

Ok so frustrated I want to give up. He's been weird kind of ignoring since that conversation. I was planning to send a birthday present and just sent a text to ask if he would be there to get it if I sent it - simple question - and he completely ignored it. So it was probably dumb but I left a voicemail and I know I sounded like an idiot but I'm just frustrated and all I want to know is that he isn't pissed at me for some reason or if I shouldn't send the gift now. I wouldn't have said anything else and just waited it out but I really did want to know about sending his gift. I guess I'll send it anyway and then shut up and wait and not care again. Oh well.

Ugggh. I hate games. Either you like me or you don't. Answering someone's question is polite and remembering someone's birthday is thoughtful. Why do I have to be less nice to be interesting? Actually yes I was sending something that I didn't want sitting melting in a mailbox for days so it was a valid question.

And here's half the reason I posted this to begin with. He confuses the hell out of me! Theres been a few times where Ive sent a message like 3 times and he doesnt answer. Later he says i "blew up his phone" or i was beeing needy. Umm not how i would describe it. I seriously wasnt sending stuff daily. Then last week he says things like "why am I not sending him pictures every day" and "why haven't I been entertaining him with questions" so that makes me think he's not getting the attention he wants. Then I do it and he ignores. Are you really all like this or is it just him?

Yes chocolates and you can have them 🙂 I'm kinda pissed at him and I'm not sending them now! I appreciate the advice. You know the Aries thing is to blow up and then it's forgotten a moment later. I don't really have a temper but I do get those moments when I'm ready to explode with some kind of emotion and then once I get it out its over. I was frustrated. I'm better now but I still know I sounded like an idiot in that message. Oh well. Should I even wish him a happy birthday or just completely blow it off for awhile?

I am just the kind of person who likes to spoil someone. I like to give lots of attention, do thoughtful things, anything to make someone feel special or make them smile. I'm also impatient as hell so put the two together and it's hard for me to reign it in lol. Maybe this isn't such a good match though because I like someone who will do the same for me. The part that I love though is the verbal "sparring" with him. I have sooooo much fun play fighting back and forth. Who has the smarter come-back or who can "win" our little verbal challenges. That part is great 🙂 ahhh ok patience.

I'm not a Leo man but I have a very close Aries friend. She gets very impatient when a man hasn't contacted her shortly after a first date or goes a little bit flaky for a couple days. My advice to her is always: WAIT. I'm usually right.

When she's been involved for a little bit of time and a man becomes distant, I tell her to do what she does when she's negotiating at work (which is very good at): tell him what she wants and what she needs. Depending on his response, either compromise appropriately or cut it off. Be direct with what you want and need. Maybe not so much with your emotions and feelings before you negotiate the first part.

She recently started dating an Aries male. They decided to date exclusively on the first date. Love you Aries women! Good luck!

gosh everything your saying is exactly what I go through w my Leo. lol. I liked when you said "I'm better now" lol after my crazy goes away I say that too. but yes they love games the chase all of what you read lol they are the most loving (well not fully in my case) but they are easy to love. and the attention is what they crave. mine is happy me here all the time but when I leave or go upstairs it bothers him. he'll text me some random stuff or hell come upstairs and ask me if I want to ride out the country or something he knows I like. ignore him! that's what I'm sorta doing. well I've taken all my attention away for a few days. anyway I feel your pain and it's like torture but stand your ground. be a biatch every now and then, they respect that and hop in your car and ride out. lol. I'm a gemini so I'm quick to bounce if shhit anint right. but most important of all is "try" keyword: try, and be patient. he knows you like him the rest is on him if he likes you back. let him prove to you. if not, you don't want him anyway. good luck.

I know I shouldn't worry but it's what I do 🙂 I'm all worked up now thinking he's going to write me off because of the stupid voice mail I left but then I have to think after all this time of being friends, if he's going to be put off by a moment of dumb behavior then I guess it's really not worth it.

Mountainlion, I would love to do just what you said if he would give me the chance to say anything but he's avoiding so I'll just have to keep waiting.

JustaLeo,
Oh some of it has to be the age thing lol. First of all it took me awhile to figure out that texting to me was entirely different than texting to someone your age. When people in their 30s+ text its usually to have a specific conversation. Like where are you? Oh I'm on my way be there in 10 min. So the whole point of it is a way to get their attention quickly and get a quick response.

Texting someone in their 20s is more like spending the day randomly commenting on things, catching up, or making plans. I always look back at my texts later and am amazed that I had a 4 hour conversation with someone that would have taken 10 minutes on the phone. So the waiting and not responding right away is still a little awkward to me.

Also maybe I'm wrong, but I hear a lot about how younger women are all about what a guy will do for them and kind of have bitchy attitudes. More selfish maybe? No offense to younger women on here, I'm just repeating what I've been told. The way I treat a guy is how I've always been even when I was younger and I think that was pretty normal for other people my age.

And no, not trying to base a whole relationship on the flirting. I have been in a really bad marriage and he has really shown me that he cares about me/worries about me and that has meant a lot. I know that when there's something serious I need to talk about he's always there to listen. He has been a really good friend. That's why I don't want to loose him over some silly misunderstanding or foolish games about if someone texts too much or too little. I would love to see where it goes, but if its not going to work I really don't want to loose my friendship with him so maybe that's why I was so frustrated.

Haha I know it's just being polite, but no more ma'am ok? Military?