workerbee1982
@workerbee1982
11 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 5 · Topics: 1
Getting libra man back
and he was begging me not to, and I eventually couldn't do it, but from then on it wasn't perfect. I was still going strong, but not with the summers infatuation and heat and total adoration for each other. He didn't lie about facts, but the basis was a lie. And I felt, maybe it was my problem, that he just didn't take me seriously.
Of course I tried to tell him that there won't be a real us unless he breaks off the ties with the family, because there's just no going around certain things. Saying that one is worthy is one thing, proving it by making a choice is another.
One day, about 10 months into the relationship, he said something over the phone that put all the pieces together, at least for me. That yes, it is finally and undeniably true, that his main goal is to keep the family together, never admit that he's with me, keep the estate together, keep the house he grew up in, and keep his daughter's admiration for him. And that night I got really drunk and I drunk texted him my feelings, which was not nice, but at least sincere, and the next day I wrote an email too, explaining why it won't work. To put it simply, because he just doesn't respect me enough to choose me. And all he said, all the nice things, were bullshit that don't stand any test. I wrote that I would say we should try this again, but I suspect he would find someone else before we could work things out, and maybe start over. You may say I'm an idiot, but it's hard for a libra girl, or maybe just for me, to say the things that I feel in the heat of the moment, because I get too weak, I cry, I show too much of myself, and I was hurt before. I just can't.
Of course I tried to tell him that there won't be a real us unless he breaks off the ties with the family, because there's just no going around certain things. Saying that one is worthy is one thing, proving it by making a choice is another.
One day, about 10 months into the relationship, he said something over the phone that put all the pieces together, at least for me. That yes, it is finally and undeniably true, that his main goal is to keep the family together, never admit that he's with me, keep the estate together, keep the house he grew up in, and keep his daughter's admiration for him. And that night I got really drunk and I drunk texted him my feelings, which was not nice, but at least sincere, and the next day I wrote an email too, explaining why it won't work. To put it simply, because he just doesn't respect me enough to choose me. And all he said, all the nice things, were bullshit that don't stand any test. I wrote that I would say we should try this again, but I suspect he would find someone else before we could work things out, and maybe start over. You may say I'm an idiot, but it's hard for a libra girl, or maybe just for me, to say the things that I feel in the heat of the moment, because I get too weak, I cry, I show too much of myself, and I was hurt before. I just can't.
think, I'm sure, I really hurt him. He didn't call or email me. After 3 months, during which I felt much better, somewhat relieved, I had a sudden change of heart. That day, I called some ppl that I owed phone calls, none of them was easy. The last call was my Libra guy. We talked, I heard he was hurt, but we decided to meet and talk.. From this it will get interesting, I promise. We wanted to go to one of our special places, I mean, I suggested, but I felt he didn't want to, so I didn't push it. He called to talk about it, we had a nice chat, in which he told me he found out that his wife may have a lover, and may want to get a divorce. I told him I was happy to hear it, and that we should talk, because after all this time, I finally feel I can, and he was interested to hear what I had to say.
We met spontaneously though, in the bar we used to have drinks when we didn't want to just have a glass of wine at home. ANd there he told me that he met someone at work, some woman who allegedly has been the mistress of many men at their company, and that she is sweet, and maybe this is what he wants now. I didn't feel sad, I guess because I just didn't believe. And that's I think where the difference between a Libra guy and a girl is, that for me these few months weren't about sex or meeting someone new but about figuring out what the hell happened and trying to come to terms with it and perhaps save it - because that's what people do for important things, right? Maybe it's stupid too, but I want to fight for this. Anyways, he told me that next week he'd take her to a holiday, just like he used to take me, and I presume quite a few other women before... 🙂
We met spontaneously though, in the bar we used to have drinks when we didn't want to just have a glass of wine at home. ANd there he told me that he met someone at work, some woman who allegedly has been the mistress of many men at their company, and that she is sweet, and maybe this is what he wants now. I didn't feel sad, I guess because I just didn't believe. And that's I think where the difference between a Libra guy and a girl is, that for me these few months weren't about sex or meeting someone new but about figuring out what the hell happened and trying to come to terms with it and perhaps save it - because that's what people do for important things, right? Maybe it's stupid too, but I want to fight for this. Anyways, he told me that next week he'd take her to a holiday, just like he used to take me, and I presume quite a few other women before... 🙂
We kept in touch during their holiday, and he was sweet, asking me where I am, like he was jealous, how much I work, what I ate that day, like he used to. But still, they were together.. So I told him the truth, that I said yes to an invitation by a guy that was interested in me and occasionally tried to ask me out. I wanted to make him jealous, of course, and I also didn't want to be a loser.. I don't know, guess I'm just human, weak. Maybe I felt that it was over, that no matter what I'd do, I lost him already. When I was with the guy, drinking bear, he texted me. when I saw in his viber location message that he was in Croatia, I knew that they were visiting a special friend, a friend that I should have been visiting with him, if I hadn't broken things off with him. And that made something tick. I decided to sleep with the guy. He asked me if I was going to, said that I shouldn't, I said I wouldn't, but I was weak. And he texted me at 5am in the morning, because he knew that he would see from my reply via viber where I was.
All in all, he knew what happened. We met afterwards, and had sex, and a very pathetic conversation, in which I guess none of us were honest about our feelings, it was just the easiest way to be cool and dismissive, because I guess we both are afraid of this relationship. So he said he's with this other woman, and he doesn't want to cheat on her, and I told him I can't be with a man who doesn't, deep in his heart, respect me for who I am, who doesn't think that I'm just as valuable as a wife two kids a big house and a lot of money. It was a sad and awful meeting, with bad sex.. We were distant.
I realized that the very thing happened that I suspected: that by the time I forgave him and accepted him and his life, he moved on. Or even if he didn't, that's what he sticks to, that's what he wants me to believe. I also realized that I love him very deeply, but also that most probably it's never going to go back to how it was, or change into something where we are honest, to the utmost, about what we want and what we'd be able to do for each other. And frankly Libra guys, it kills me that he couldn't wait even 3 weeks to run off with someone else. He loves sex, he can't go without it, I know, and I knew this would happen if I disappeared, but still, it kills me. I think there are two type of libras. one for whom a relationship and it's ceremonials matter, the dates, the travels, the holding hands, the romantic things, seen by the public, and some, like me, to whom a marriage or being official matters less, but deep feelings do matter. I could wait 3 months to figure out what was going on, but he couldn't wait even 3 weeks to charm the easiest target. Even if he needed something good in his life, even if he neeeded sex, even if he was hurt, this is something that bothers me. Why would any relationship in the world matter if the biggest flames can be replaced in a matter of weeks? if any of you can give me an answer about this, I would really appreciate it.
I realized that the very thing happened that I suspected: that by the time I forgave him and accepted him and his life, he moved on. Or even if he didn't, that's what he sticks to, that's what he wants me to believe. I also realized that I love him very deeply, but also that most probably it's never going to go back to how it was, or change into something where we are honest, to the utmost, about what we want and what we'd be able to do for each other. And frankly Libra guys, it kills me that he couldn't wait even 3 weeks to run off with someone else. He loves sex, he can't go without it, I know, and I knew this would happen if I disappeared, but still, it kills me. I think there are two type of libras. one for whom a relationship and it's ceremonials matter, the dates, the travels, the holding hands, the romantic things, seen by the public, and some, like me, to whom a marriage or being official matters less, but deep feelings do matter. I could wait 3 months to figure out what was going on, but he couldn't wait even 3 weeks to charm the easiest target. Even if he needed something good in his life, even if he neeeded sex, even if he was hurt, this is something that bothers me. Why would any relationship in the world matter if the biggest flames can be replaced in a matter of weeks? if any of you can give me an answer about this, I would really appreciate it.
First off good luck on getting anyone on DXP.net to read this novel you wrote word for word. I skipped every other paragraph only taking what I need because most of it is a bunch of metaphors and clich? words to get your point across. Next time state the facts clearly and ask what we think.
Now what I basically got out of this whole thing is he is a typical man trying to have his cake and eat it too, he thought you would be down if he got you to fall in love first, because in truth majority of women once in love they lose sight of reality and how to stand up for themselves out of fear of the man they love walking away. They forget that just like you liked him, there's another one waiting around the corner for him to f**k up. You??d know this if you know your worth??_
Anyway, so it comes out that he has a family, you —say?? you tried to end things, but you did not, not completly and you should??ve. At some point you have to take —love?? out of the equation and deal with facts and reality, love and emotions will deter you away from that, and you??ll end up looking dumb. You said yourself that he doesn't respect you enough to choose you. You don't respect yourself enough to walk away completely from a married man, so why would he respect you enough? You did not require him to choose you, otherwise you would??ve walked away completely no matter how much you cared. You might??ve felt you had the right to be there because you didn't know about the wife and kids at first. I know how you feel, but you will soon realize you gain so much more when you walk away. Look forward to what is to come.
Oh and now the plot thickens your dude thinks his wife has a man on the side, well shit good for her! And then, he STILL doesn't choose you, he goes and gets himself a NEW side piece from the office. Now he sounds messy and downright greedy.
You sound like a grown ass woman, take your feelings out of this and do what your first mind is telling you. Chalk this man up as a loss and keep it moving. And as a Libra don't you dare try being his friend right now either, because keep in mind he's still a man, and a Libra man at that and will try to charm his way into having not one but two mistress??s if you allow it. Get rid of him.
Now what I basically got out of this whole thing is he is a typical man trying to have his cake and eat it too, he thought you would be down if he got you to fall in love first, because in truth majority of women once in love they lose sight of reality and how to stand up for themselves out of fear of the man they love walking away. They forget that just like you liked him, there's another one waiting around the corner for him to f**k up. You??d know this if you know your worth??_
Anyway, so it comes out that he has a family, you —say?? you tried to end things, but you did not, not completly and you should??ve. At some point you have to take —love?? out of the equation and deal with facts and reality, love and emotions will deter you away from that, and you??ll end up looking dumb. You said yourself that he doesn't respect you enough to choose you. You don't respect yourself enough to walk away completely from a married man, so why would he respect you enough? You did not require him to choose you, otherwise you would??ve walked away completely no matter how much you cared. You might??ve felt you had the right to be there because you didn't know about the wife and kids at first. I know how you feel, but you will soon realize you gain so much more when you walk away. Look forward to what is to come.
Oh and now the plot thickens your dude thinks his wife has a man on the side, well shit good for her! And then, he STILL doesn't choose you, he goes and gets himself a NEW side piece from the office. Now he sounds messy and downright greedy.
You sound like a grown ass woman, take your feelings out of this and do what your first mind is telling you. Chalk this man up as a loss and keep it moving. And as a Libra don't you dare try being his friend right now either, because keep in mind he's still a man, and a Libra man at that and will try to charm his way into having not one but two mistress??s if you allow it. Get rid of him.
Posted by tiziani
I read up until the part where your relationship was based on a lie. There's your answer. Get him back? You never even got to know each other in the first place.
+1
Took me a while to get through this. I stopped when it said you found out he had a family but didn't mind. If I wasn't so bored at work today I wouldn't have read the rest. Part of me wishes I didn't. My response was the same as tiz, "get him back? You never had him".
Oh, for the rest of you... tl;dr
She meets and starts seeing a guy.
She finds out guy has wife and kids in another city.
She doesn't mind so much that he has a family as long as she is the priority.
She realizes she is the mistress and he ain't leaving wifey.
She breaks it off because he doesn't respect her (lol).
She calls him a few months later and is jealous to find he replaced her.
She sleeps with him again but he likes the new kitty better.
She wants him back under her clutches.
She meets and starts seeing a guy.
She finds out guy has wife and kids in another city.
She doesn't mind so much that he has a family as long as she is the priority.
She realizes she is the mistress and he ain't leaving wifey.
She breaks it off because he doesn't respect her (lol).
She calls him a few months later and is jealous to find he replaced her.
She sleeps with him again but he likes the new kitty better.
She wants him back under her clutches.
The end of the story is worth repeating though...
How's that for ego? You think you're high biggest flame and can't understand how he replaced you so fast? You were weekend pussy. I'd like to say a man's wife is his biggest flame. This guy cheats on his so I don't know...but he still wasn't leaving her for you. You seriously need to reconsider your role in all this. Biggest flame?
Posted by workerbee1982
Why would any relationship in the world matter if the biggest flames can be replaced in a matter of weeks? if any of you can give me an answer about this, I would really appreciate it.
How's that for ego? You think you're high biggest flame and can't understand how he replaced you so fast? You were weekend pussy. I'd like to say a man's wife is his biggest flame. This guy cheats on his so I don't know...but he still wasn't leaving her for you. You seriously need to reconsider your role in all this. Biggest flame?
*facepalm*
=_= my advice:
1) let go of him, he was never yours to begin with and never will be. He is a cheater and a selfish marker, why are you putting up with this BS is the real question
2) stay the fu*ck away from taken men
1) let go of him, he was never yours to begin with and never will be. He is a cheater and a selfish marker, why are you putting up with this BS is the real question
2) stay the fu*ck away from taken men
Posted by LibraSid
Oh, for the rest of you... tl;dr
She meets and starts seeing a guy.
She finds out guy has wife and kids in another city.
She doesn't mind so much that he has a family as long as she is the priority.
She realizes she is the mistress and he ain't leaving wifey.
She breaks it off because he doesn't respect her (lol).
She calls him a few months later and is jealous to find he replaced her.
She sleeps with him again but he likes the new kitty better.
She wants him back under her clutches.
Love the cliff notes LOL!
I heard this story soo many times, dxp should have a separate forum just for these kind of cases
I didn't have enough attention span to read this but thanks to librasid I got it, lol, and you op should find a man who isn't married
Join the Conversation. Explore Yourself. Connect with Others.
Discover insights, swap stories, and find people. dxpnet is where experiences turn into understanding.
Create Your Free Account →Related Topics
I recently started hitting it off with a libra man, two years older than me. We first started talking on Facebook, then
Let me start off by stating i'm a libra guy and steal in my teen years.....any way my problem is i just cant get over th
Let me start off by stating i'm a libra guy and steal in my teen years....any way my problem is i just cant get over thi
LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWD HELP ME Basically in about 3 weeks time I'm due to go to a festival with my libra ex boyfriend. Bas
I have known my libra husband for 7 years. Dated 5 been married for 2. And in those years I have never paid for a meal o
to me their consistently the most feminine/pretty looking out of every male sign. its been my experience that even with
My Libra boyfriend recently broke up. Out of the sudden he stopped to have feelings for me. He sees me as a friend now.
Me and my 1.5 year bf just broke up last week. It came out of the blue. We were in a long distance for about 9 months. W
... that you made enemies with a Libra man? If this topic already exists, I appologize for double asking.
Being content is a form of maturity. I have never felt so absolute about a love. My Libra bf and I are only four months
We met through work, or lets say rather business, ie. we were not coworkers. During a casual call he invited me for dinner to discuss business, and we had such a great time, we ended up at his place. And we were infatuated from that night, at least he was, but he drew me in (I'm a libra girl) almost instantly. I think he was exactly what I wanted at the time, he wanted to be with me, to go out with me, like a normal couple, which I missed after 6 years of a long distance relationship - which was I think still the happiest time in my life, one that gave me the most strength and faith in myself.
It would be hard, long, and complicated to explain to you why problems appeared in our relationship, but what I felt again and again was that what he says (about us), what he thinks, and what he does, are just not in harmony. That somewhere deep down there is a lie about us. Of course it turned out that he has family in another town, and since a lot of money is involved, and two sort of grown-up, problematic daughters, he would never separate. To be honest, the fact, that he has a family, and a wife, did not bother me the regular way. I felt we have something strong going on, and that for him it's impossible to feel a similar attachment to two people at the same time. What bothered me was not jealousy. What bothered me was the hidden agenda, that he wanted someone to have fun with and build a life with, parallel to his family life. Or maybe it wasn't that, but the fact the he wasn't brave enought to tell me that up front. That's why I felt that even though he was amazed by me, in many ways, he didn't think much of me. He thought that I would be perfect for a certain role, because I'm not that rich or successful to be an equal. Not that I think that he would be comfortable with the thought of being with someone who is equal to him in any way.
So what poisoned our relationship was not the time he spent with the family - he spent more with me. He was invested in it, he made sacrifices. But he also joked about this all being the prelude, to make me fall in love, so that he can keep me in a certain box in his life. I tried to break things off after a couple of months, when I realized this hidden agenda, or whatever this all was