why can't I let this libra go??

I'm not really looking for advice or anything, this is just cause I gotta let it out somewhere... maybe someone can relate?

idk why i can't just get over him.... it pisses me off how its always so back and forth with us. either we're ok and friendly out of nowhere and then silent and cold the next. basically we're just mirroring off each other and its this neverending cycle and I never know how hes going to act with me one day. sometimes I'm fine and sometimes I'm not. sometimes I hear a song that reminds me of him and I still get sad. sometimes I get the urge to call him and go to the movies together or just hangout but I think "he wouldn't want to..." and don't. I get confused when hes nice to me after moments of acting like I don't even exist. I get my guard up and I'm scared. But I want to let it down. I want to just tell him that I miss him.... but I wouldn't even know how or if he'd even want to hear it. I feel uncomfortable talking about my feelings with him because he doesn't know how to handle them.

We've become such strangers...

I wish I could rewind time to when we were still just friends. I would love having even that back... I still care for him. I wish he knew..

just writing this out has helped already..

Girl, I am in the same boat. My heart misses him when it's been awhile. UGH. WHY!!! >:/

Curses.

The question is if they miss us too when they become cold?

Posted by formersalomeea
The question is if they miss us too when they become cold?

yes that IS the question... I feel like "what the heck! whats going through your mind, boy??"

No, it's not about them, it's about you! The question is why would you still want someone who makes you feel like that?

I get it. Break ups suck. Especially if you weren't the one who "wanted" to break up. I went through some crazy shit with my ex wife but had all the feelings you mentioned.
idk why i can't just get over him.... it pisses me off how its always so back and forth with us. either we're ok and friendly out of nowhere and then silent and cold the next. basically we're just mirroring off each other and its this neverending cycle and I never know how hes going to act with me one day. sometimes I'm fine and sometimes I'm not. sometimes I hear a song that reminds me of him and I still get sad. sometimes I get the urge to call him and go to the movies together or just hangout but I think "he wouldn't want to..." and don't. I get confused when hes nice to me after moments of acting like I don't even exist. I get my guard up and I'm scared. But I want to let it down. I want to just tell him that I miss him.... but I wouldn't even know how or if he'd even want to hear it. I feel uncomfortable talking about my feelings with him because he doesn't know how to handle them.

The back and forth is terrible. Feeling good one day and then you see or hear something and you get them stuck in your head again. You always hear people say you have to accept the good with the bad... while I understand what it means I think this is a case where you need to remember the bad when you remember the good.

When you get sentimental and want to call and hang out with the friend you used to have, remember the games. When you see them somewhere and they act all nice, remember the last time you saw them and they were a bitch.

Letting go can be hard but it can also be necessary. I have seen several of the posts you have made on here and you are just torturing yourself now. You have to accept that you may never understand what the other person was/is thinking. You get mixed signals when you see/talk to them, so... stop talking to them.

You don't need someone who makes you wonder. Someone going slow is one thing, but playing hot and cold games is different. It is manipulation. You need someone you can talk openly and honestly with, not someone who you are "uncomfortable talking about your feelings with".

Above all else remember this... It is his loss, not yours.

Posted by QLIbraMale
Libra Charm is something not easily forgotten.

You hit this one right on the head. I think if my relationship with mine ever ends, I will never forget the memories we made and how me made me feel. Never.

you're right LibraSid... I guess I just keep making excuses for his behavior, and find ways in my mind to justify it all.. and maybe I'm just doing that because i'm lonely, and I miss his attention so I'm forgetting all the bad parts and only thinking about the good parts. the good things that I miss. and thats the version of him that I miss. but I don't think thats coming back. because I guess deep down inside I'm just going to remember every so often the good things but in the end I will always remember how he took me for granted.

I wish we could have been just friends. I was silly to think that we could be anything more :/
we just weren't good together... but believe it or not he was the best I've had.

Posted by dreamingpisces

I wish we could have been just friends. I was silly to think that we could be anything more :/
we just weren't good together... but believe it or not he was the best I've had.

He may be the best you have had so far but he's not the best you'll get. Also, it's not silly to hope for something more and take a chance on love. You'll never sail the ocean if you're afraid to leave harbor. I know what you mean too about wishing you had just stayed friends though. My ex and I made great friends but that is past now.

I'd think the first thing to do is stop making excuses for the other person. I've been there and it'll drive you crazy. It'll suck for a while. They'll still be in your head and random nothings will have them coming and going from your thoughts for a while. But, if you take care of yourself, get out with good friends, do things that make you feel good (hobbies, exercise, whatever) it will fade. Being alone doesn't mean you have to be lonely.

Also, realizing that you only miss a version of the person is good. Missing the attention and good parts is to be expected. It took me a little while to realize that what I miss isn't my ex, it's the companionship. I miss coming home to someone, but not her. So, I just take it a day at a time. I better myself while time erases it. There are still days when I think about her but the thoughts are pretty infrequent now and they don't stay long anymore either. It just doesn't feel the same any more. It gets better and it gets easier.

Posted by dreamingpisces

Posted by formersalomeea
The question is if they miss us too when they become cold?

yes that IS the question... I feel like "what the heck! whats going through your mind, boy??"

click to expand

I thought it's only me who needs some insight ...yes! it bothers a lot his insensitivity ...or what it seems to be his insensitivity. Why ppl. try hard to hide their feelings? ...or just men...is this a manhood thing? I would really appreciate a statement of how the significant other feels. It would help clean the air.

Thank you for posting this. And @LibraSid, thanks for the insight.

@OP---- you're not alone. I totally just miss the friendship. He and I-- we should have just remained friends. Because now, we're mere strangers. You'd think that we were never friends.

thanks for the advice... yeah, I actually went out again last night and it felt great, he didn't come across my mind until my cap friend brought him up. my cap friend, hes the one that I truly wanted in the first place and he says hes really sorry it didnt work out. actually, this friend admitted to me that he wanted me before my libra did, but he didnt say anything to ME, just the libra. so when the cap told him the libra automatically called "dibs" and got me. So it was just a game to him. So that explains why he started treating me like shit once he got me. It sucks because the cap and I could have been happy... we would have worked out. But libra got in the way of that. and now that I remember the libra has tried on occasion to turn me against the cap. now I know why.

I'm glad he told me this because now any good feelings I had towards the libra are GONE. For good. I'm not someones toy they use and get bored with and throw away weeks later.


you libras are great people. I just got stuck with a bad one.

I won't be making anymore posts about this guy because I plan on cutting him out of my life. and avoiding him at work as best as possible. the only reason i kept holding on was because I thought somewhere deep inside he cared. well now that I know this information I suppose I was very wrong. I see no reason now to hold on. I truly gave him my all and I know at times he made me weak... really fucking weak... but not anymore.

Posted by QLIbraMale
@dreamingpisces good 4 U. yeah there's good and bad libras but being aware of bad relationship will save you time and money lol.

tell me about it... I'm pretty mad about all that time wasted and all the time I spent making myself look like a fool.. SO done. lol. I gotta be more careful next time :/