Why is this so hard?? Need some men's advice!!

Trying to be friends with Libra male who i had relations with..He was and is not ready for a relationship..He has told me that he is not interested in me in any way but he would like to keep a friendship..

So why is this so hard?? He keeps bringing up my ex-boyfriend non stop, he called me last week and told me that the whole time we were at dinner the last time, all he could think about about was my ex-boyfriend..I didn't really know what to say, so I laughed and asked him if he was gay..Tried to lighten it up a bit..

I do not want to have any indepth conversations with him about emotions and the whys..As far as I am concerned we have said all we have to say in regards to us..He has told me that he is not interested and that was all I needed to hear..He told me that he loved me but don't take it the wrong way..So i did not take it the wrong way..He has also been telling me about a girl he was intimate with and giving me details !! I told him that he should not be discussing her business with other people..He also spends alot of time trying to convince me that he is not a player..

What would be the best way to tell him that I am not interested in hearing about the people he dates and that I do not want to be questioned about my dating life or have him bringing up my ex-boyfriend all the time ?? Without damaging the friendship..

Leo-kitten

People have problems with friends all the time and sometimes they do not advice...But I do agree with you that this friendship is probably not going to work..Shit just keeps coming up..

Yes, just cut him out. It's the best thing to do or they will just keep hurting you with the back and forth shit, it's so not worth it. I have with mine. I said, what I needed to say. (that I love him) That was on the 6th and I haven't talked to him/seen him since and I don't plan to ever again. Be strong remove the number and try to think about a better future. That's what I do. Where he's no longer around to confuse you, ruin your day or make you emotional. It gets to be all about you again. How it should be🙂

Getting the last word helps too😉 (Just begin honest here) I won.

Yes the last word is good but I agree with all the others, just keep away from him....he is not interested in you as you are with him and yes you coming here for advice means you feel so much more than wanting to "just be friends".

Go and have some fun, this guy will bring you NOTHING but grief.

The guy sounds like an attention hog. He wants to draw attention to himself and it's rather disturbing to tell you he was thinking about your ex. Does he know your ex personally?

If it bothers you that he talks about his sex life with other people or inquires into yours, then speaking up is the best thing to do....put an end to it.

I'm not sure of your ages, but this guy doesn't seem to have much respect for you. He tells you that he's not interested in you, but has no qualms about sharing details of his sex life with other people? Um, not healthy.

sounds like you're going through something like I am. Read my post if you want. it's the one that says "Libra/Libra Combo: Nuts or Perfection?" The guy in my life does some things similar to the one you're talking about. He talks about his exes and somewhat of his sex life as well. It's weird and i wonder why he does it. But i'm still into him and i wonder if i'm nuts.

May not be healthy at this moment..But trust me that man is talking his way out of my heart..I'm pretty sure, if he keeps it up, there will come a day when even the friendship won't mean much to me..

Not giving any reactions, just taking it all in..

You keep getting signs that you two do not function well as friends. So stop trying to force it.

Friends talk about sex.

Friends talk about past relationships.

Friends WANT to hear and talk about the details of their friends lives. That is why they are friends.

You keep providing reasons why you two are bad friends but keep trying to force the issue.


About the ex...I have no idea what your relationship was when you were having relations as you put it but he might be in a situation where in his mind he would date you but there is something about "how you used to be" that he doesn't like and your ex represents that thought. Just shooting in the dark there.

^ HAHAHAHAHAH, sounds if so.

run forest run....

Nicodemus

You are absolutley correct that there are signs that we do not function well as friends..Yet there is something that somehow keeps us trying !!

And you are right friends do talk about sex but usually not the details..I generalize with friends but I don't tell them the private stuff, which is what he is doing..I don't think that's fair to the other woman either..

I do discuss his past relationships with him, his marriage, kids and we do share details of our lives..

Maybe I just have to realize that we are two different people and accept it for what it is..I would never discuss being intimate with someone else with him, I would not lie if he asked but I certainly would not tell him any details..But obviously he feels the need to share this info with me..Maybe it's way of constistently trying to remind me that we are friends only..

He did ask me if I was intimate with my ex and I was honest and said yes..And I have never heard the end of it, he brings him up all the time..

He called me today and told me he is going out tomorrow night with a buddy to pick up chicks..I told him to have fun and use protection...See, I am lightening up !!

Haha nice! They are way better friends. Than you learn to respect them more and the feelings go away.

Leo kitten

You do not need to read it or comment..Your choice !!!