Advice needed after fight with Pisces guy

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britneygirl
@britneygirl
13 Years

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Hi - my Pisces guy and I (Gemini) had a huge row more than a week ago and he has not communicated with me since! The action was his fault and I admit I reacted very badly, but it was really not worth breaking up over. He just packed his stuff and left and no amount of my texting / emailing /messaging could get him to contact me. I went through every emotion, snapped and broke up with him on a text as I thought his silence was him breaking up with me, wrote heartfelt email apologising and just saying I love him and forgive him and want to be with him. Still nothing. He has blocked me and all my friends on Facebook. Then I gave him the option to break up with me or confirm that we had broken up and still nothing! Star sign aside I know he is not the kind of person to just not break up cleanly - or is he? This is the guy I want to be with for the rest of my life, we are both madly in love - how can he just cut me off? This is the first time I have seen this side of him (6 months together). Now I know I will know how to deal with it next time - but is there a next time? He is away for work for three weeks now so I am giving him his space - do you think he has ended it or just wants more time? This Gemini is going crazy especially as this is a long-distance relationship. I just want to be with him despite all the hurt this has caused me!
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celticlioness
@celticlioness
15 Years1,000+ Posts

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If this is how he treats you following an argument after only 6 months together then try to imagine how he may escalate this behaviour as you move forwards. Stop saying sorry to him. In hindsight I would have dumped my ex-pisces ass when he did this during our first 6 months together. Instead we stayed together for 15 years and his "poor me" victimness just grew to the point he would continue with this sulking, martrydom for up to 4 months at one stage. When he started to do it to our daughter I finally saw sense and got out.

He sounds like a complete child.

"Now I know I will know how to deal with it next time"

How will you deal with it next time?

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britneygirl
@britneygirl
13 Years

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The relationship was just so amazing, so romantic and he is my best friend! He would buy me flowers, gifts, a true gentleman. All my friends thought we were going to get married! But also in the military which I am not sure makes this worse. He stepped over a barrier of mine with a friend and when I said something he flipped out. I broke his phone - we were both VERY drunk might I add. But I have apologised and done all I can to make amends. I do not understad how he can just not say "it's over" even in a text, that would be so much easier! By deal with it next time I meant I would be able to expect his disappearing act.
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LouLore
@LouLore
14 Years500+ PostsPisces

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Posted by britneygirl
I reacted very badly



Just like you hadn't seen this side of him, the swimming away side inthe six months you dated.. I'm going to imagine that he hadn't seen this side of you, which is WHY he swam. No one completely cuts off contact with someone for no reason. You may have really shocked him.....

On the other hand, I wil admit, when I do something wrong I often go to a corner and lick my wounds. In order to not feel bad I might play a little bit of the victim game in my head and hideout for a while while the whole thing blows over. If this is the case, he may come back.

If it is the case that you showed a very surprising side of your self, he may be gone for good.

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britneygirl
@britneygirl
13 Years

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I just really believe he is not the kind of person to not break up with properly if that is the case - I gave him ample opportunity! When I speak to my friends they say it is not my fault and it sounded like a normal couple's drunken argument (and I tell the full story admitting my wrongdoing!) I guess I am hoping that his silence means he is not ready to talk and my constant barrage was all too much - I stopped contact on the weekend. But these Geminis we need to talk! It is frustrating as well that it was all alcohol-related and I have told him that I know neither of us are the people we behaved like. It is his birthday on Thursday - I am loathe to stoop to his level by not acknowleding it, and think I have nothing to lose by a creative romantic gesture? I just want to know if he's gone, or just sulking! If the latter it is worth a shot! Thanks so much for the advice!
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britneygirl
@britneygirl
13 Years

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Basically we were around at a friend of mine's house - she had a crick in her back and we were jokily walking on her back. Her top was up around her neck and I started to get uncomfortable so went to the bathroom. When I came back she was on the couch and he was joking around telling her to take her top off. I was just like "whoa" and he flipped out and stormed out of the house. But it is forgivable! He is just obsessed with having a threesome and goes a step too far with the booze...
BUT even if he wanted to end it, he could. It takes a 10 second text message. Inflicting all this pain is much worse than the crime! And yes I know I shouldn't have lashed out and thrown the phone, and I am booking therapy if not to sort my head out after this for the benefit of future relationships, but also to get to the bottom of why I did that when drunk as I am not an angry drunk at all!
Do you think he would appreciate the gesture for his birthday? I really, really love him and just want for this to never happen again!
Great insight though - thank you.
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XV2
@XV2
14 YearsPisces

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He wanted a threesome and got upset because you didn't immediately comply?!?! And you still want him back!?!?! Incredible what some guys can get away with. You??re probably better off forgetting his sorry ass.

Even in cases were both partners are open to that sort of experience it's something you have to talk through and agree to mutually... not like.... you suddenly you walk into a room and he's getting your girl friend naked. ha!

He's actually doing you a favor by walking away.-
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P-Angel
@P-Angel
20 Years25,000+ PostsPisces

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oubt very seriously that this guy is a dickhead.

Read between the lines .. while realizing how accommodating a Pisces is once they've bonded with another and wrapped their world around the other.



Posted by britneygirl

The action was his fault and I admit I reacted very badly, but it was really not worth breaking up over. He just packed his stuff and left and no amount of my texting / emailing /messaging could get him to contact me.





A Fish who is bonded, isn't going to just pack up and leave ... nope. A Pisces who is bonded to a partner will only swim away after the last straw has been drawn, and they cannot take it anylonger.

Look at the part where she says it was all his fault ... she reacts badly but doesn't say that her reaction was any of her fault in him leaving, does it? No the only fault she mentions is his, eventhough she knows she reacts badly.

If a Pisces is constantly being told they are wrong in a relationship, and then because of this wrongness they have to endure the other reacting badly while taking no responsibility, and then having to endure this person telling them that it's not break up worthy, as if the Fish cannot decide for themselves what is break up worthy for themselves. ... then eventually the Fish is going to swim away.

And that doesn't make the Fish a bad one, it makes him a strong one ... because he won't take the crap any longer and will help himself.

I get the tone coming across here from this Gemini ..... her Fish is at fault for their problems, and I suppose if this is believed by her then that gives her license to react badly and he is just suppose to take that bad behaviour in stride and not think any worse of her for it.
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P-Angel
@P-Angel
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Oops, this part was my words from above and not part of the quote ....



A Fish who is bonded, isn't going to just pack up and leave ... nope. A Pisces who is bonded to a partner will only swim away after the last straw has been drawn, and they cannot take it anylonger.

Look at the part where she says it was all his fault ... she reacts badly but doesn't say that her reaction was any of her fault in him leaving, does it? No the only fault she mentions is his, eventhough she knows she reacts badly.

If a Pisces is constantly being told they are wrong in a relationship, and then because of this wrongness they have to endure the other reacting badly while taking no responsibility, and then having to endure this person telling them that it's not break up worthy, as if the Fish cannot decide for themselves what is break up worthy for themselves. ... then eventually the Fish is going to swim away.

And that doesn't make the Fish a bad one, it makes him a strong one ... because he won't take the crap any longer and will help himself.

I get the tone coming across here from this Gemini ..... her Fish is at fault for their problems, and I suppose if this is believed by her then that gives her license to react badly and he is just suppose to take that bad behaviour in stride and not think any worse of her for it.
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P-Angel
@P-Angel
20 Years25,000+ PostsPisces

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It amazes me how women can come in here and talk about how horrible of a relatinship they have ... then in next the breath talk about it being a deep love, and how she can't bare life without him.



Women are deluded as fuck ..... what they have is a hungry heart that's so fucking starving that they would belittle/demean their own fucking selves to find a person to fill that spot. And it doesn't matter the person is, he could be the biggest asshole alive, but she won't care .... she only knows that her heart is feeding ... like a blood thirsty vampire.
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celticlioness
@celticlioness
15 Years1,000+ Posts

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Posted by P-Angel
Oops, this part was my words from above and not part of the quote ....



A Fish who is bonded, isn't going to just pack up and leave ... nope. A Pisces who is bonded to a partner will only swim away after the last straw has been drawn, and they cannot take it anylonger.

Look at the part where she says it was all his fault ... she reacts badly but doesn't say that her reaction was any of her fault in him leaving, does it? No the only fault she mentions is his, eventhough she knows she reacts badly.

If a Pisces is constantly being told they are wrong in a relationship, and then because of this wrongness they have to endure the other reacting badly while taking no responsibility, and then having to endure this person telling them that it's not break up worthy, as if the Fish cannot decide for themselves what is break up worthy for themselves. ... then eventually the Fish is going to swim away.

And that doesn't make the Fish a bad one, it makes him a strong one ... because he won't take the crap any longer and will help himself.

I get the tone coming across here from this Gemini ..... her Fish is at fault for their problems, and I suppose if this is believed by her then that gives her license to react badly and he is just suppose to take that bad behaviour in stride and not think any worse of her for it.



Typical, its always the other persons fault. Yes of course he is the strong one - smh. She has admitted fully to her part in the argument and has tried to right it, like any mature adult, he on the other hand has gone and sulked in order to inflict pain - passive aggressive, like an immature child, a trait I have found in the unevolved fish. Yes he should absolutely take her behavour in his stride, I mean WTF is wrong with looking for a threesome, how dare she react badly - you're unevolved - age regardless.
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MeMyselfAndIntrigued
@MeMyselfAndIntrigued
13 Years1,000+ PostsCancer

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Posted by ElusiveSoul
I just got to the the point of OP saying "I know he wants a threesome".....I was done....we all have our phantasies....but when a fish loves you, they want you all for themselves...period.....
Let him gooooooo.....as matter a fact, run the opposite direction as far as your lags can carry you.....He is the defaulted one...sorryyy

Yep...that'd do it for me too. He told her to take off her top and wants a threesome...? No respect or love there, Pisces or no Pisces. Put on your walking shoes!