Beginning Stages with a Taurus Man.

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Wendie0001
@Wendie0001
14 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 8 · Topics: 1
I'm looking for advice with my Taurus man. I met him a few months back and surprise surprise, I'm head over heals for him. We mainly communicate through text message and he tells me the sweetest thing ever (I know, past of the their charm). He tells me how much he likes me, thinks about me and can't wait to be with me and how incredibly attracted he is to me and my kisses. Problem is that he makes plans with me to go out and usually the same day ends up cancelling. I keep hearing that we need to be patient with this sign so I reassure him that it's ok and we'll meet up some other day. But when we make plans lets say a week later, he cancels again. I'm not sure why he bothers telling me all these sweet things if he never wants to see me. We haven't even had sex which I find strange because from my experience, that's what most guys want. He's also done the disappearing act a few times where I don;'t hear from him for a few weeks and when I finally do, it's as if he picks up where he left off. No explanations other than he's had a rough few weeks and I certainly don't question him either. Perhaps I should? I'm a Pisces/Aries and we are known for our patience but sometimes I just want to tell him to go shove it. Of course I don't because I really like him. So I follow his lead. We met on an online dating site and while I shut down my page a week or so after I met him, I see that he still has his up. I get that they like to have women paying them compliments and all but why all the lies and confusing emails/text messages saying that he can see himself falling for me. Did I mess it all up by telling him that I feel the same? Unfortunately for me, I wear my heart on my sleeve unlike him obviously. I've read some conflicting info where they like the chase and that they don't like the chase. I'm ashamed to say that I've given him no "chase" at all. So is giving him the chase a good way to bring him or is it too late at this point? Anyone with knowledge on this, can you offer up some much needed advice?
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nimbue
@nimbue
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 42 · Posts: 2899 · Topics: 50
Posted by piranhaparadiise


The answer to this is you are an option not a priority...the old adage excuse the men have *problems* ...pfft...if someone was important to them you would be kept close by and not kept in limbo and who disappears and not say a word for weeks — who does that to someone they like/adore whatever ? men don't want another man to snap up their woman so they wouldn't even want you to be left on the side with no word for weeks...
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+1 yup
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nimbue
@nimbue
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 42 · Posts: 2899 · Topics: 50
Posted by Wendie0001
He tells me how much he likes me, thinks about me and can't wait to be with me and how incredibly attracted he is to me and my kisses. Problem is that he makes plans with me to go out and usually the same day ends up cancelling. I keep hearing that we need to be patient with this sign so I reassure him that it's ok and we'll meet up some other day. But when we make plans lets say a week later, he cancels again. I'm not sure why he bothers telling me all these sweet things if he never wants to see me.

He's also done the disappearing act a few times where I don;'t hear from him for a few weeks and when I finally do, it's as if he picks up where he left off. No explanations other than he's had a rough few weeks and I certainly don't question him either.



i'm a pisces-aries too 😄 my guess is you've become addicted to the highs and lows. high-he texts you flattering things, romantic attention. lows-he goes awol, he keeps cancelling on you with little to no explanation. but step off the rollercoaster for a second.

basic respect dictates you let people know what's up if you can't see them after you've made plans. i'm a flake myself, but multiple back outs? something's off. another woman, intimacy issues, whatever. it doesn't read right.

you've told him it's okay to do this...so he carries on. you don't question him...so he doesn't level with you. a big dose of honesty would help your situation, but here's where i agree with pp. a man who wants to be with you will make that clear to you. it feels like you want him even more because you aren't sure he wants you...it's exciting.

taureans like comfort/stablity. your arrangement benefits this guy because nothing is challenged, nothing changes and he can string you along as much as he wants. i get he may have stuff going on, and guys often detach when they're stressed. it's just facts.

if you're sure you want him for the right reasons, you need to fall all the way back if there's any chance of rectifying this. and then stop pussyfooting, you owe it to yourself to be treated in the way that you'd like. 🙂
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Wendie0001
@Wendie0001
14 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 8 · Topics: 1
It makes me sick to my stomach every time I think about how he's treated me and how I've allowed it. However in my defense, I swear that I was just waiting to finally see him face to face in order to tell him how I feel. I didn't want to resort to doing it through text or email as he would probably retreated and been awol again then leaving me with no closure. Never the less, I'm no longer going to be his door mat and the next time he makes plans with me, I have every intention of telling him yes then something came up last minute. If he doesn't like it and that's the last I hear from him well then so be it. Not to sound full of myself but I am quite the catch, so attraction or no attraction, he'll have to do the chasing from now on or we are through.
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nimbue
@nimbue
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 42 · Posts: 2899 · Topics: 50
don't beat yourself up. dating's got weird. my mum met my dad at 18 and BAM that was it. never looked back. now it's push-pull, being stood up, e-flirting, multiple dating, not texting back too soon and tons of other crap that gets in the way of romantic connections and is quite frankly a little sad.

ordinarily, i'd say 'ooh don't play games if you want something to happen with this man, no tit for tat.' but that shit works on taurus men. they're stubborn, they're masculine and they rise to a challenge. even though they love feminine women, when you stand up to them it's like waving a red flag that they charge towards. it shakes them out of their rut.

only trouble is, you could be setting the bar for even more bs, turning this into a catch me if you can farce. i did this push-pull thing with a taurus till i got really bored and sick of him and his slow motion self. he broke off so many dates for 3 whole months. he put me to shame in the fake department. just as he started to take me seriously...it was too late by then. i realised i had gotten more into the chase than him, so that was that, the spell was broken and he left with a pretty fucked up ego.

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Wendie0001
@Wendie0001
14 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 8 · Topics: 1
It makes me sick to my stomach every time I think about how he's treated me and how I've allowed it. However in my defense, I swear that I was just waiting to finally see him face to face in order to tell him how I feel. I didn't want to resort to doing it through text or email as he would probably retreated and been awol again then leaving me with no closure. Never the less, I'm no longer going to be his door mat and the next time he makes plans with me, I have every intention of telling him yes then something came up last minute. If he doesn't like it and that's the last I hear from him well then so be it. Not to sound full of myself but I am quite the catch, so attraction or no attraction, he'll have to do the chasing from now on or we are through.
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Wendie0001
@Wendie0001
14 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 8 · Topics: 1
It makes me sick to my stomach every time I think about how he's treated me and how I've allowed it. However in my defense, I swear that I was just waiting to finally see him face to face in order to tell him how I feel. I didn't want to resort to doing it through text or email as he would probably retreated and been awol again then leaving me with no closure. Never the less, I'm no longer going to be his door mat and the next time he makes plans with me, I have every intention of telling him yes then something came up last minute. If he doesn't like it and that's the last I hear from him well then so be it. Not to sound full of myself but I am quite the catch, so attraction or no attraction, he'll have to do the chasing from now on or we are through.
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ReallyNiceAriesPerson
@ReallyNiceAriesPerson
15 Years1,000+ Posts

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Posted by piranhaparadiise
Posted by Wendie0001
He's also done the disappearing act a few times where I don;'t hear from him for a few weeks and when I finally do, it's as if he picks up where he left off. No explanations other than he's had a rough few weeks and I certainly don't question him either.



women fall for this all the time...but the thing is they [the women] wouldn't abandon their love interest and not tell them anything or not contact them for weeks on end...so why do they think it's ok to accept this from a man ?? the men know that you are waiting for them...that's why they pick up where they left...

The answer to this is you are an option not a priority...the old adage excuse the men have *problems* ...pfft...if someone was important to them you would be kept close by and not kept in limbo and who disappears and not say a word for weeks — who does that to someone they like/adore whatever ? men don't want another man to snap up their woman so they wouldn't even want you to be left on the side with no word for weeks...

Unless he is dead...out in the desert...in the army on tour...in the hospital in a coma...there is technology up our noses lol there is a way to contact you...no excuse
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***Actually there IS technology in the desert and in the army on tour.
That pretty much leaves you with dead or coma - but there are seances, so I guess that rules out dead.....
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nimbue
@nimbue
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 42 · Posts: 2899 · Topics: 50
Posted by Wendie0001
Wait so you think I should play the cat n mouse game with him?



no, i was going by what you said.


Posted by Wendie0001
I'm no longer going to be his door mat and the next time he makes plans with me, I have every intention of telling him yes then something came up last minute. If he doesn't like it and that's the last I hear from him well then so be it.



Posted by nimbue


ordinarily, i'd say 'ooh don't play games if you want something to happen with this man, no tit for tat.' but that shit works on taurus men. they're stubborn, they're masculine and they rise to a challenge. even though they love feminine women, when you stand up to them it's like waving a red flag that they charge towards. it shakes them out of their rut.

only trouble is, you could be setting the bar for even more bs, turning this into a catch me if you can farce.



i outlined what potentially could happen. it could be months of phone tag. he might not even respond to cat and mouse, every taurus man is different. my question is, why would you sell yourself short like this? at the moment he's in the driver's seat and if you can't play games, then don't play them.

Posted by Wendie0001
I just want to be given the opportunity to at least see him in person to tell him what I think and feel. So how do I make him pursue me now after all this?
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lol, no you don't. you want to see him in person to prove you've won him over. there's nothing stopping you from telling him what you think and feel over the phone. and that last thing you said...well, there's your problem. you can't make anybody pursue you!
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capbaby
@capbaby
14 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 367 · Topics: 7
he's playing you. You give him the attention he wants, when he wnats it, and that is all it is. I guaranantee he has others he's stringing beside you. if he's not meeting you, hes only luke-warm about you. Keeping you on a string until/unless someone else doesnt work out...

Give an ultimatum..meet me in person, no excuses, or get lost.

Told a taurus I dated from a dating site.."I won't wait for you.." And I didn't. I lived my life. He's back...although too late now. He's only a friend now and hates that. LOL
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Wendie0001
@Wendie0001
14 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 8 · Topics: 1
I'm just starting to realize that I'm worth much more. Like or no like, I'm no longer going to allow him to even make plans. He obviously has no respect for me or my feelings so basically what does that say about him as a person OR him in a relationship with me. I can't let him keep me on a string so I'm going to try my hardest to just let go and find someone worth my time and that I deserve. Hopefully it won't be another Taurus. They are way too complicated!