Scorp/Gem & Aqua/Cap Confusion

Soooo my husband and I are separated due to MANY reasons, but a big one is him hitting me. I've written a post on here in the past about my coworker who is a Scorp Sun Gem Moon. We get along so well and he's been there for me through some rough times. At one point... I felt like I could tell him anything and it may have confused him because he made a pass at me. However, me being Aqua with Cap Moon & Venus irregardless of any possible attraction I felt like..... I'm married. And I told him that. He began acting weird and distant and we stopped talking for a while. He's married and separated too... but he's been separated from his wife longer than I have with my husband. Recently we began talking again and he made a pass at me again once he found out I was separated. But my response was even though I'm separated I'm still legally married and that we should keep it professional. He responded with, "—" and it actually made my heart sink. When I try to talk to him at work it's cordial, but not the same. Today I text him that there's things I wanted to say, but don't know how to say them and he said, "professional". It hurts because deep down I do really care for him. But my head and heart are at a serious battle. I want to tell him I care, but I want to not look like a fool at work and be that couple at work who thinks no one knows but everyone does. But I get sad whenever I think about the possibility of the communication staying so cold and distant as it is right now. Plus, I want both him and I to figure out what's going on in our marriages before even trying to start something with each other. I can't tell him every time I see him I get wet... or that I want to lay under him all day and breathe the same air he exhales. My Aqua Sun prevents me and My Cap Moon thinks of professional suicide. Somebody HELP... even though I don't know what I need help with. Maybe I'm venting.



P.S. We did have a close moment where something could've happened. But I stopped it.

Posted by GetMisted
Why would it be professional suicide?

We work together. I'm actually his superior... and neither of us are officially divorced.

Hun, I hear you. The only thing I can say is you're doing the right thing, even though it's killing you. Keep first things first. Your sun/moon should be able to pull it together, but don't let this drag out. Decide what's going to happen with your husband and then proceed accordingly. Don't deny your feelings for the coworker, but don't let them control your actions. Will you lose the Scorp? Maybe. But also maybe not, if it's meant to be. You got this.

Posted by sultrykitty
Hun, I hear you. The only thing I can say is you're doing the right thing, even though it's killing you. Keep first things first. Your sun/moon should be able to pull it together, but don't let this drag out. Decide what's going to happen with your husband and then proceed accordingly. Don't deny your feelings for the coworker, but don't let them control your actions. Will you lose the Scorp? Maybe. But also maybe not, if it's meant to be. You got this.

Awww thank you so much @sultrykitty...you always give good advice. I do feel bad that I can't move forward, but do feel like maybe it's the right thing to do. It's just weird how him and I keep coming back together and crossing paths. But you're so right.... if it's meant it'll be.

Posted by GetMisted

Posted by Wineaux15

Posted by GetMisted
Why would it be professional suicide?

We work together. I'm actually his superior... and neither of us are officially divorced.

Well.. I don't see any confusion from either of you. You both want each other, but due to circumstances, it seems impossible.

The "still married" issue seems to be the biggest deterrent, correct? What's the timeline on divorce filings?

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Yes, we do very much want one another. I'm not sure where he stands on his proceedings, but I filed already.

Posted by Wineaux15

Posted by sultrykitty
Hun, I hear you. The only thing I can say is you're doing the right thing, even though it's killing you. Keep first things first. Your sun/moon should be able to pull it together, but don't let this drag out. Decide what's going to happen with your husband and then proceed accordingly. Don't deny your feelings for the coworker, but don't let them control your actions. Will you lose the Scorp? Maybe. But also maybe not, if it's meant to be. You got this.

Awww thank you so much @sultrykitty...you always give good advice. I do feel bad that I can't move forward, but do feel like maybe it's the right thing to do. It's just weird how him and I keep coming back together and crossing paths. But you're so right.... if it's meant it'll be.

click to expand

I've sort of been where you are, so I totally get what you're feeling. 🙂

Posted by Effervescent
I don't understand why you guys can't date... I honestly don't. I get kind of annoyed when people say "we're not divorced yet." Well if you're in the process of getting divorced then guess what? You're free to date and fuck whoever you like. If you know the marriage is over and the divorce is eventually going to be finalized then move on. Why wait for a piece of paper as confirmation for you to be able to date other people?

I totally understand what you're saying! But a part of me is "old school", and if I want to give him ALL of me without hesitation and this divorce hanging over my head and vice versa with my situation. I don't want to finally give in to him and his wife woos him back in and he breaks my heart!I'm also considering my job too.

Posted by GetMisted

Posted by Wineaux15

Posted by GetMisted

Posted by Wineaux15

Posted by GetMisted
Why would it be professional suicide?

We work together. I'm actually his superior... and neither of us are officially divorced.

Well.. I don't see any confusion from either of you. You both want each other, but due to circumstances, it seems impossible.

The "still married" issue seems to be the biggest deterrent, correct? What's the timeline on divorce filings?

Yes, we do very much want one another. I'm not sure where he stands on his proceedings, but I filed already.

Scorp needs to stop dragging his feet then.

click to expand

Right, but he may still love his wife and family. To be honest all I know is that they're separated. I only know bits and pieces of what he tells me. He knows all about me though. From what I know she was not supportive and works long hours and he's always with the kids. They don't spend much time together and he wants an equal he can do things with like a best friend / lover.