Cancer man??!!

Hi,

I've never posted on a forum before but I thought I could do this and see others opinions at the same time make myself feel abit better by writing it all down.

Okay so I work as a personal trainer at a gym and one for a few months the cancer man in question would make some advances which I can be quite shy so I would just ignore him and walk off
Plus it was my work place.

He asked if I was a PT and would I train his sister then took one of my business cards.. Following that never contacted me until a month later I saw him at the gym and he asked if he could take me out and message me,

I get shy and didn't know what to say so I just said I'll think about it..
So he did message me and we got talking at first I wasn't that interested until we spoke on the phone and we would speak for hours having a laugh and jokes it was all very playful
I then allowed him to take me out we went to Miller and Carter and again straight away we hit it off really well didn't stop laughing we was quite drawn to each other..

So after that he dropped me home although I think he wanted more but that didn't happen.

Rewind a week and we had spoke every day and went on more dates I then stayed at his and literally from that point on we was with each other every day and it was all good

Then we discussed one day about ex's and I asked him if he still felt for his ex I don't even know why I asked and he told me honestly that he still had love for her yet he didn't want to end things with me because of that he totally adored me
Told me he's never met anyone like me I'm amazing...

So it was all going amazing for 6 weeks again spent every day together.
We was out with his friends the one night and he had been drinking and he said infront of all his friends were official aren't we babe! And as I get shy and we hadn't discussed that I said well you haven't asked me and we need to talk about it
I know I know probably the worst thing to do to a cancer man
He didn't let it go and was being stubborn in a playful way but said he still wants to be with me and I'll just have to wait for the next opportunity.

So again still we was really good from there he would always tell me how he sees us as a relationship
He even asked me to move into his flat
He acted as though he had truly fallen for me and I loved that
He even asked me to go on holiday with him (this holiday was one he had booked for him and his ex :/)
Which because of that that's why I was always standoffish
Anyway last week he really changed towards me went really distant for no reason and me being a Gemini I overthink everything and couldn't understand it
He stopped contacting me but we still spent every night together
I then said we need to talk as I was getting frustrated with how distant he was being and I said I needed some time out
Which we later spoke about it and he said he's been busy which is why he's not been so attentive and we made up..

The next day I dropped him of

Plate sets and cutlery for his flat and he was with his kids having food in a pub.

Everything seemed fine.. Later that night I spoke to him and I had planned on staying at mine that night anyway he did ask if I was going over then was like okay see you tomorrow.

So the next day he didn't contact me until around 5pm and he said 'we need to talk'
I knew what was coming so I went to meet him and he said ever since the other day he's just totally lost interest and I said don't lie to me as I knew he had lost interest before then
He went onto say how this is how he gets if someone ends it and to give him time to sort his head out
Also told me I shouldn't do that in future in relationships
But had a few things at mine and said he would call me later to come get them

He didn't call and I contacted saying I'm going to bed and I'll assume he's not coming

The next day he replied saying to just throw them away

I then said I wasn't going to do that and regardless to what's gone on I didn't want to fall out as I have a lot of time for him

His response was

We can't be friends although he's got allot of time for me too
And that he's not going to phone or call me after this and he hopes I do the same
But it was nice knowing me and he'll miss me

Straight away I assumed he was back with his ex
And was pissed off he had lied to me about his reasons rather than have some respect and just be real with me

After thinking it over I sent him one last text yesterday saying how he's treated me like I'm nothing which is unfair I've been nothing but good to him bla bla blaa
And he called me saying don't contact him again and he's met someone else.

Honestly I don't even want to be with him however that is a big bruise to my ego ha no I just don't understand how people can be so heartless

I personally think him and his ex was just on a break or something

My question is anyone that's had experiences with cancer men long or short term do they come back at all? I know it sounds bad me wanting him to come back as I don't even want him and if he did by the time he did I'd of forgotten all about him but I just want that satisfaction.

Also is this normal for a cancer man? Did he mean anything or did I matter to him at all? He seemed so genuine to start with and then just changed
Will he even feel bad for how he's treated me?

Well if you spend every night with him it means he's prob just bussy,because if he would rly be distant he would act cold towards you,he would cook,hug or be with you,if he wouldn't want to be with you he would just fade off or vanish,he's moody thats why he can combeack sad or happy,we get happy with small things,but small things can make us sad also,so yeah.talk to him,ask him where you both stand in a relationship and what does he want from you,what he feels for you,shouldn't have told him that you're not official in front of all these people,that might have damaged his heart, if he says and you want it,you better say it,because if you don't he might think you're not into him or he's not giving you enough and he could easily go away feeling like he doesn't give you enough and you don't value him,we are sensitive people with big hearts and if you get into our shell and see our heart,make sure you don't damage it to much,because if you do a cancer will cast you out out of the shell and you'll feel cold,distant and you might even start thinkin you never knew him,because people who are inside the shell and who are outside see cancer as a different person,outside we are confident,outgoing,persistant,some people might even say we have no feelings,tho we laugh alot,but only those close to the heart and those who rly are inside the cancer man can know he's sensitive,nurturing,kind,loving,loyal,honest ,if he cooks for you it's a sign he likes you,if he stops sharing hi's food you know he's geting distant,as funny as it sounds,food is important for cancers and i could never cook for person i don't like or i don't feel anything for him,i cook only for my fav people in my life and myself ofc 😄 its how they say,way to the man's heart its thru his stomach 🙂 he might be afraid and wouldn't want to hurt you so he might make up things to make you feel better why he's not so warm as he was before,i would suggest talking to him,if you feel he's lying he prob is, trust your sixth sense, every time i didn't trust my 6th sense i was wrong 🙂 sometimes it's not what you want it to be thats why i didn't trust it,but it the truth tho,might be a hard one,may the universe be with y,talk to him honestly make sure he knows how you feel about hi's words,if you feel he's lying tell him,tho he might get offended if he's telling the truth,but be honest,thats the key for relationships!trust respect and honesty, without these 3 love can't last

@Gemini1204 he sounds dammaged ,don't waste time on guy like this,he might try to comeback,but he would have nothing new to say,past is a past,many cancers tend to hold on to it,if a past calls dont answer because it has nothing new to say,respect yourself enough to walk away,it's not pride,it's self respect,you deserve the best person by your side,not a guy like this,i've been in a smiliar sittuation but i'm cancer and the girl was pisces,learned so much,relationship was so alive,but she fucked me up real bad,had huge depression,but when my sagittarius moon kicked in that was it i was over it 🙂 make sure you learn lesson from this,exeprience builds you up,gets your char stronger ,your char will act as a tool into the building of your life 😉 whatever you do don't take him back, that will be lesson for him,that he can't just come and go as he pleases,he needs to commit to something ,not go back and forth hurting people,goodluck !

How did you find this forum?

Part of your story seems to have been cut off so I'm not entirely sure what the fallout was about. I am a Cancer female and speaking from my own experience both with myself and the other Cancer's in my life I would say that from what I've seen Cancer's have a hard time letting go of those they love. Because of that we often end up dating well before we are ready to move on from the last relationship. Sometimes a new relationship will help us to let go of the past and can even turn into something long lasting (I've been with my rebound guy for almost 19 years) but more often we recognize the relationship as just a band aid when things don't go well and we choose to move on. Typically we are genuine though, we start things with the best of intentions and he very well may have hoped to build something with you but found that you just weren't the right one for him. The fact that he is cutting things off completely and not stringing you along shows that he at least has some respect for you and isn't going to try to keep you as a side piece. But don't be surprised if he shows up every now and again just to see if you are still thinking about him. If he does though don't dive back in because he'll likely just do it again.

There is alot of issues. Idk just kick back and do your thing.

I posted the rest as a comment by the way.
I definitely won't be getting back with him no way he's totally used me and made me feel worthless!
Thank you for your responses

Posted by PerceptiveSymmetry
Part of your story seems to have been cut off so I'm not entirely sure what the fallout was about. I am a Cancer female and speaking from my own experience both with myself and the other Cancer's in my life I would say that from what I've seen Cancer's have a hard time letting go of those they love. Because of that we often end up dating well before we are ready to move on from the last relationship. Sometimes a new relationship will help us to let go of the past and can even turn into something long lasting (I've been with my rebound guy for almost 19 years) but more often we recognize the relationship as just a band aid when things don't go well and we choose to move on. Typically we are genuine though, we start things with the best of intentions and he very well may have hoped to build something with you but found that you just weren't the right one for him. The fact that he is cutting things off completely and not stringing you along shows that he at least has some respect for you and isn't going to try to keep you as a side piece. But don't be surprised if he shows up every now and again just to see if you are still thinking about him. If he does though don't dive back in because he'll likely just do it again.

Thank you as much as its not nice to think I'm a rebound I kind of am right 😢 haha
The thing is I did see his heart and I know he's not a bad person that's why it's such a shock to me how he is being also the fact at first he tried to say the break up was my fault when he just wasn't that into it. It hurt me that he's tried turning it around on me that's not fair!

Thank you for all your comments guys made me feel 100 times better xx

Posted by Impulsv
When I read your post it sounded slot of disinterest coming from you
N he said next time don't do that in a relationship. I thin your comment when he said u were official sunk in for him.

No he knew full well how I felt.
This is my coping mechanism obviously I'm not disinterested as I'm writing this post if anything I wanted to be with him I adored him he made me happy and I treated him like a king literally! He would always say how good I am to him. When I am into someone there's nothing I won't do for that person and it wasn't for weeks after that he ended it

Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
There is alot of issues. Idk just kick back and do your thing.

And that is what I shall do 😉 thank you

Posted by Goldigold
Watch out for some men no matter what their sign, they will say anything to get into your pants. That's why I always make them wait it out.

Thank you! Yes I've learnt the hard way there and that now applies for me too they have to wait! X

Posted by Gemini1204

Posted by Impulsv
When I read your post it sounded slot of disinterest coming from you
N he said next time don't do that in a relationship. I thin your comment when he said u were official sunk in for him.

No he knew full well how I felt.
This is my coping mechanism obviously I'm not disinterested as I'm writing this post if anything I wanted to be with him I adored him he made me happy and I treated him like a king literally! He would always say how good I am to him. When I am into someone there's nothing I won't do for that person and it wasn't for weeks after that he ended it

click to expand

From what I've read (and I dated a Cancerian) they don't want anything to do with a SNOW WHITE (see the birds chirping over your head?). I've heard they want the FAT, sailor mouthed woman that doesn't take any BUTTER from you/people.....is that NOT true?

My Cancerian married a fat, sailor tongued Taurus woman...when I bumped into him I told him, "You lost the BEST thing that every came into your life". He couldn't look me in the eye! Looked up and said, "I know". 😏

Love,

Eva

Posted by EvatheDiva

Posted by Gemini1204

Posted by Impulsv
When I read your post it sounded slot of disinterest coming from you
N he said next time don't do that in a relationship. I thin your comment when he said u were official sunk in for him.

No he knew full well how I felt.
This is my coping mechanism obviously I'm not disinterested as I'm writing this post if anything I wanted to be with him I adored him he made me happy and I treated him like a king literally! He would always say how good I am to him. When I am into someone there's nothing I won't do for that person and it wasn't for weeks after that he ended it

From what I've read (and I dated a Cancerian) they don't want anything to do with a SNOW WHITE (see the birds chirping over your head?). I've heard they want the FAT, sailor mouthed woman that doesn't take any BUTTER from you/people.....is that NOT true?

My Cancerian married a fat, sailor tongued Taurus woman...when I bumped into him I told him, "You lost the BEST thing that every came into your life". He couldn't look me in the eye! Looked up and said, "I know". 😏

Love,

Eva

click to expand

Hehe thanks Eva that's made me feel better I don't know why I'm letting it bother me I think it's the whole rejection thing what makes it worse for no reason he blocked my number I haven't even contacted him he also called me and told me to not contact him and that he's met someone else like what the hell did I mean nothing to him :/
I know it sounds bad me saying this but I know I'm too good for him I mean it says something when even his friends said that to me xx

"I know it sounds bad me saying this but I know I'm too good for him I mean it says something when even his friends said that to me"

Then take this with a grain of salt little one. Yeah, we hate to be ignored and dissed. BUT Pisceans do that! I unfriended, blocked on FB, and on my phone the Saggy I broke up with three days before my birthday! That should tell you that we don't CARE what holiday is close (Christmas, Thanksgiving, our birthday, etc) we will give you the boot! Or in this sense, we swim away and/or give you a slap on the face w/our wet fin!

Love,

Eva

And you're welcome! God has closed that door for you and will blow one wide open for you...I promise!! 🤗