Do we ever really process it?

People every day always give us those clever little sayings, BUT I don't think most people take their words in emotionally. I think most of us just take them in on an intellectual level. But we never let them really sink in; instead people just agree to those cute little "Dr. Phil" sayings b/c they sound good & when we speak of them, we sound wise & like we're not dumb after a breakup/heartbreak.

You guys know what I'm talking about! Those little sayings like:

1. "What comes around goes around."

2. "Cherish what you have before it's gone." (People CAN'T possibly be taking this in all the way b/c if they were, they wouldn't keep betraying/taking advantage of their partners!--it kills me to see someone crying hysterically over someone when they finally fly the coop! It's like um...what on earth did you think would happen if you kept betraying them?! DUH!)

3. "You deserve better."

4. "If it's meant to be, it'll happen/it'll be."

5. "If he/she loved you, they wouldn't do/say that to you."

6. "When a person shows you who they are, believe them!"

Don't you find it amazing that we often only sub-consciously take messages in during the heat of the moment. We know right/wrong but yet we never really inwardly take these sayings in, even though we agree that they're true & even though we know that being hard-headed will bite us in the ass.

So why is it that we know these sayings are true but yet we live our lives/go about our relationships as if we don't even truly believe in them!

How can a woman go around saying "I know my worth" but yet she still end up entertaining a man who cheats on her, or beats her or won't commit to her? I think it's b/c those clever little sayings SOUND great & make us appear to be more intelligent than we really are, BUT do we really really believe those sayings or just use them for show? After all, if we really believed in them & took them in emotionally/psychologically, wouldn't our actions reflect that we do?!

1. "What comes around goes around."
Never seen it happen to someone who has done somebody wrong. We live in hope.

2. "Cherish what you have before it's gone."
I cherished someone and he decided he would rather be with someone that definitely does not cherish him. But she cherishes his pay packet so I guess that's nice for them both.

3. "You deserve better."
maybe - does that mean I will get it??

4. "If it's meant to be, it'll happen/it'll be."
Not sure about this - if Guy A is meant to marry Girl B how does fate or what/whoever bring them together? He is not going to knock on her door suddenly one night with flowers and a ring, is he?
Should we stay at home and wait because we know it will "just happen"?

5. "If he/she loved you, they wouldn't do/say that to you."
Yep. People choose how they want to treat you.

6. "When a person shows you who they are, believe them!"
yes, unless they are pretending to be something else.

Seriously, I see people going around saying/using those clever little sayings but I don't really think people have taken them in emotionally. I think people just say it b/c it sounds good.

My 1 friend always says, "Girl he's not worth my time if he can't treat me right" in front of us, but I think she only says that b/c she doesn't wanna hear our mouths/criticism when he cheats on her or does her wrong again. I think she just says those phrases around us to give off the impression to us & others that she's alot stronger than she really is.

Idk, I'm just noticing that alot of people don't really mean it or really believe in the advice they give others or themselves. No matter how good someone's advice is or no matter how clever they phrase or simiplify their advice, people are going to be hard-headed & choose to emotionally ride out the wave, even if doing so results in their self/emotional destruction

yep. just lip service.

like the girlfriend who feels compelled to tell you "well he is the loser - he has to live without you"
What is that supposed to mean - if he wanted to live with her he wouldn't have dumped her!

I have just ended something because I thought I deserved better - doesn't mean I will get anything better tho.
Everyone else is settling - why should I be the exception?

At least I only have myself to blame for the emotional destruction!
I guess if something better is meant to be it will happen—

It's weird. I think people KNOW this stuff, but somehow they dont' live it. They don't learn. I've stumbled over the same rock 30 thousand times when I KNOW better. It's like the brain may get it, but the heart's just not going to give up.

Posted by Shadows
It's weird. I think people KNOW this stuff, but somehow they dont' live it. They don't learn. I've stumbled over the same rock 30 thousand times when I KNOW better. It's like the brain may get it, but the heart's just not going to give up.

You said it perfectly. We KNOW it but just choose not to live it!

What's even worse is that not only do we make the same mistake over & over again, BUT WE ALSO continue to experience the negative consequences/results time & time again. We continually do the SAME things but expect DIFFERENT results each time.

And even worse than worse lol...we get mad at our friends for giving us the same ole advice! Welp, they don't have a choice BUT to give us the same advice. Some things are black & white..It is what it is...Advice doesn't change just b/c we don't wanna hear the truth.

And usually, by the time we FINALLY accept & acknowledge the truth, we've pushed away all our friends or partners & are somewhere alone dealing with the heartbreak.

Hehe, right? Yeah, that's really the problem. WHY the HELL do we still get upset when we get the same reaction we always get when we continue to do what we've always done?!? Why the shock and awe?

Aaaah human nature, dear!

We're so damn hard-headed!

The same rings true for when we purposely put ourselves in harm's way even though we knew not to do so b/c of seeing other people's experiences in the same situation. For some people, people like to fall on their own faces & expose themselves to harm/heartbreak even though they could've avoided it all had they learned from someone else's mistakes1

There are some things I don't want to experience or ever go through simply b/c I've seen others go through it. I know not to put my hand on a hot stove & I think it's silly to purposely put your hand on 1, even AFTER seeing everybody else get burned for doing so! If 500 people got burned by putting their hand on a hot stove, why on EARTH do you think you'd get a different outcome!??

People hate falling & getting back up again but people hate even MORE not falling to begin with b/c some people like the aspect of venturing off into forbidden territory. Some people actually like the excitement & adventure of doing something wrong or going against their morals. Perhaps, this explains why good girls like bad guys?! Ugh...