Sagittarius trouble with ex-sagittarius

Hi Guys

I'm new here, but I have a problem to share and I would greatly appreciate some feedback.

I'm a Sagittarius- 17/12/80.

Now over a year ago I became involved with a married man (yes I know-shame on me) who I happen to meet on a harbour cruise party (he is also sagittarius- 23/11/74). We instantly hit it off, it was like love at first sight or something like it. Now a mutual friend at the time tipped me off that he may be married but he could be seperated. After our first encounter we met for lunch where he told me everything-that he was married, and that he doesn't normally do this sort of thing behind his wife's back, and that we could only be friends and nothing else.

I was quite embarressed after that but a couple of weeks later he telephoned to meet, and I went along. We continued to see each other for months and grew quite attatched to each other. He was extremely unhappy in his marriage and was considering ending it. He was unhappy in his marriage long before I came along. Now our relationship was not just a physical attraction, it was very much emotional, we both pledged our love for each other and trully felt that we were soulmates. We saw each other for several months.

Now, I got sick of waiting for him to decide whether or not he was going to leave his marriage (he claimed it was for his daughter's sake-1 year of age, that his wife would prevent him from seeing her if he left), so I started seeing a few guys hoping for a serious relationship to eventuate ( some of which i told him about- and he wasn't happy with). Until one day after i refused to see him after a date, i telephoned him, and he acted very cold towards me on the phone and I sensed that was going to be the last time i'd speak to him. This was in september-2004.

Now in December-2004 he starts to text message me on the mobile inviting me to go out jetskiing with him (i loved the sport) all of which i ignored. then he repeatedly telephones me, all of which i ignored. His text messages were desperate requesting that i don't shut him out of my life and that he still cares for me.
Now i responded my telling him i am getting engaged to a man i met around the time of my birthday ( all of which was false), in order for me to move on and hurt him as much as he had hurt me. He then telephoned to tell me of the personal hell he went through when we weren't talking-such as him telling his parents about me ( not in detail), trying to decide whether he wanted to remain in the marriage (for his daughter's sake) or be with me. Any way we came to the agreement that he would leave his wife to be with me and i would leave my soon-to-be fiance(a lie) to be with him.
This is where is gets hard-the day he approached his wife to tell her he's leaving the marriage she told him that she was pregnant and for him to pack his bags, and that she could raise the kids on her own and didn't want him in her life anymore. Now he contacted me the very same day in tears realising that he can't leave her because of the child on the way. So it goes without saying that we ended on very bad terms 2 months ago. I haven't heard from him since (this is the 2nd time we go without speaking for this long), but i have a feeling i won't hear from him again. My problem now is that i can't seem to move on, and i am still very troubled by the situation, because i question myself as to whether or not I was being played for a fool or if it was all genuine? Should I contact him to see how he is? (or perhaps not because he was extremely angry with me at the end-because i refused to see him while he claimed he was trying to leave his wife and she sprang the surprise ofa baby on the way). so i really don't know what to do, and i'm extremely depressed by what's happened. Could anyone shed some light please?

If its a sagittarius and it is still breathing then kill it, its the only way. its like taking the garbage out.

that's an interesting solution to the situation...... but i'm also sagittarius 😢

so bad of me so sad but what the hell we all can't be perfect.

Yes well thanks for the advive, But like i said i had no idea he was married at the time. But i've learn't my lesson now.

I agree with the others on this one,thats always what men not just signs use on thier mistresses.They never leave there wives and always use thier kids as the excuse.Happens too monotanously to think that it could be true.Very,very,very slim chance of him actually meaning it since it didn't happen the first time.

The man's using you

HI I AM NE TO THIS SETTIN BUT I NEED HELP I POSTED TO ANOTHER SECTION OF THE MESSAGE BOARD BUT REALIZED THIS IS THE APPROPRIATE SECTION.

I HAVE BEEN DATIN A GUY FOR APPX 9 MONTHS (THIS IS OUR SECOND TIME)WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER FOR @14 YRS AS FRIENDS AFTER A LIFE TURNIN EVENT FOR ME-4 YRS AGO-I DISCOVERED MY LOVE FOR HIM (HE IS A SCORPIO) WE DATED 6 MONTHS-WE BROKE UP(A LOT OF NASTY WORDS SAID BY BOTH OF US)
TWO YRS LATER HE RETURNED INTO MY LIFE AT A TIME I WAS HAVING SURGERY-ONE THING LED TO ANOTHER I FORGAVE HIM. FOR NOT BEING SUPPORTIVE OF ME
WE TRIED DATING AGAIN THIS TIME GOIN TO A THERAPIST AFTER 9MONTHS HE BROKE UP WITH ME IN FRONT OF THE THERAPIST . IWANTED TO KILL HIM BUT DID NOT HAVE THE STRENGTH... HE IS INVOLVED IN MY GODCHILDREN/NEPHEWS LIFE SO I SEE HIM OCCASIONALLY.
HE EMAILS ME ASKIN ME IF I WANT THIS OR THAT(I FEEL AS A MEANS OF COMMUNICATION)
I HAVE OFFERED TO BE CIVIL AND POLITE IN OUR CONVERSATIONS AND DOINGS FOR THE SAKE OF MY NEPHEWS... BUT IM NOT SURE IF I AM DOIN THE RIGHT THING

THIS IS TRULY DRIVING ME CRAZY......HELP ANY THOUGHTS WOULD BE HELPFUL...

THANKS

Hi Jennie8 and welcome!

Life has brought you a lesson sweetie - a lesson for you to learn how to trust your instincts...read what you wrote - "I have offered to be civil and polite in our conversations and doings for the sake of my nephews...but I'm not sure If I am doing the right thing."

The reason you are not sure is because deep in your HEART you KNOW you are not doing the right thing...you have put YOU on the back burner....you are doing this for your nephews and not for your own inner peace. You need to do this for YOU honey. Your nephews will be fine - they will see you as a woman who honours herself, respects herself and won't let anyone treat her any differently. Remember, children model more after our actions than our words...

If you do not want to contact him, you do not have to...you also do not need mine or anyone elses advice to tell you so....go within - listen and you will know what to do.

My best to you Jennie!