livictori
@livictori
11 Years500+ Posts
Comments: 2 · Posts: 761 · Topics: 90
Arguing = Foreplay?
some people are like that, sometimes they like the tension to build up causw it makes the release feel a lot better and keeps the mystery alive, but it's still shouldn't be justified to interfere with your feelings toward each other
Posted by Impulsv
If something that keeps resurfacing it hasn't been solved for his satisfaction yet
I just think he'll hold a grudge for infinity
Posted by Impulsv
Ahhh so this is a matter of forgiveness
he says he forgives but then brings it up. ALL THE TIME
Posted by Impulsv
Does he not believe ur sorry? Like you might've said it but maybe the actions he feels are not being quite shown?
Whatever it was it triggered him deeply then
Looks like abandonment issues from his family history.
I understand his feelings not his actions. The grudge this is a new dynamic, I don't get. I usually leave people alone if I feel they are going to hurt me. Reliving pain over and over again is a miserable thing to do to oneself.
He replays these movies in his mind of injuries from people. I understand the pain part. I just try to replace the feelings of pain by moments of recovery. That's very short lived. He's a good person and I really like him, but it's like inviting someone to live in hell with you
Posted by Impulsv
Thats the infamous self stinging to the death scores are so famous for. Only because a deep pain was triggered
Did u break up once n came back?
Yup!
The roller coaster is hella annoying. If I threaten to leave, I better leave; if I stay, I'm bound to be punished
My moon is in scorpio and I love heated arguments with my lover followed by incredible sex
Posted by MissFisk
If he wants to argue, give him something to really argue about. Fuck his best friend and text him a pic of you riding his face.
That should give him the intensity he's craving.
I don't think even in my wildest.....
Posted by Impulsv
He doesn't trust u got what it takes to be there for the long haul. Unfortunately it's testing as self preservation what hear the sabatoge.
U need to be in a good place urself ( the heart space) n have a discussion about how u love him but his pushing u away is making it very difficult. That u want to be there for the long run n to please not self Sabatoge.
Since it's his trigger he will get emotional soy must remain calm firm n solid.
Don't threaten to leave if this continues
Instead just affirm that his behavior is a detriment to what both want
Thank you for the advice. I jokingly said last night, how are we going to be married if he doesn't let this go. He relaxed a bit. But I can see the ambivalence within himself. With me he is trying but the push/pull is more internal. My problem is I can feel it and he wants assurance that feels like infinity. My intentions are pure. He knows how I feel, I express it all of the time. His doubt is contagious
Posted by The_eleventh_sign_11
My moon is in scorpio and I love heated arguments with my lover followed by incredible sex
yup. His sun and moon. I think he is on the brink of falling and this is his way of pacing himself. As well as reminding me to appreciate his effort... at least in his mind
Some people just want something to argue about as an excuse to make up and have sex. Forget the arguing. Just grab a hold and get to it.
Posted by Infinite8Posted by livictoriPosted by Impulsv
Does he not believe ur sorry? Like you might've said it but maybe the actions he feels are not being quite shown?
Whatever it was it triggered him deeply then
Looks like abandonment issues from his family history.
I understand his feelings not his actions. The grudge this is a new dynamic, I don't get. I usually leave people alone if I feel they are going to hurt me. Reliving pain over and over again is a miserable thing to do to oneself.
He replays these movies in his mind of injuries from people. I understand the pain part. I just try to replace the feelings of pain by moments of recovery. That's very short lived. He's a good person and I really like him, but it's like inviting someone to live in hell with youclick to expand
Aaawwww... I love the way you think Livictori
Thank you for the encouraging words. I hope he sees it that way. I think the fact we share the same moon and rising sign makes you understand me more.
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I wish it was a new argument. Even when we're talking about something random, BOOM there it goes again. If I say I don't want to go near a subject; it MUST be discussed even in a round about way. WTH? Worse yet, we're not even having sex. I just think he loves the tension