Disrespectul?

I have been very intimate with this guy for 4 years now. We are not considered "a couple" because I think he's afraid of committment or just being an @ss.. Anyways, we are not together, but we are more than friends. (Its a little complicated).

Anyways, I would like to know your opinion on something. Okay, he goes out to the club and he video tapes himself. He asked me to watch one of them with him and his friend. He was on the tape letting different girls kiss him, they were flirting and whatever else. I was furious!

Personally? I thought that it was disrespectful even though we're not together. To me, that was showing me right there that he has no respect for me. I thought it was ignorant of him to do something like that and basically embarrass me and make me look like an idiot. I told him how I felt and he said that he don't consider it being disrespectful because I'm not his woman. We have bee friends on and off and intimate for a very long time. And so if I'm not his girlfriend, then what am I?

Told you the relationship was complicated. What do you guys think about all of this honestly?

Ronda,

It sounds like you are correct...about the commitment thing.
If you want a true relationship with the respect that u deserve, then move on from this rockstar. Four years of waiting for something of substance is wayyyyyyy too long.
You deserve better than being his booty-call friend. Goodluck.

Very disrespectful, I'm appalled. You should cut him off completely until and unless he's ready to make a committment to you, and definitely don't let him "in" so to speak, in any way into your life until he apologizes for this stupid move.

As a side note, men seem to take advantage sometimes of what we allow them to take advantage of. He's probably thinking, "why buy the cow if I'm getting the milk for free". "And while I'm at it, let's add some drama and jealousy into the mix, because I know she's got feelings for me and it will be fun to test her".

😢

"we are not together, but we are more than friends."

I would definitely find out if he agrees with this statement, because it sounds to me like he is barely even regarding you as a friend...very disrespectful.

i was in one... similar to yours.

to the question of "what [are] [you] to him?"

a close friend that happens to be sexually or physically attracted to.

it just so happens that this is happening because you let him in, eventho he closes you down by not considering you as an actual girlfriend. he does this because when it was me, i knew that there was no possible chance we could be together, the physical thing just happens because we let it happen even thou we know its not right. i suggest you make a move to end it, if you don't want to get hurt anyfurther. i had to end it but when i made move to end it, i knew that she got hurt. (so did i)

just a males point of view.
take care of it and find someone who can recipocate your love.

I think it's always bad to define a relationship on physicality. I know that's not a very scorpioish thing to say, but I've noticed it's ALWAYS bad when that is your main point of connection.

i know its bad. but it happens when its not supposed to happen sometimes. i know that is vague kind of a stupid answer, but all i can explain is when you are physically and a little bit of emotionally attracted to one another. it just happens sometimes.

what can you really do except to get out of it and move on and learn from the mistakes that you do.

Very disrespectful why would one put up with this. I am in a like relationship but when I am with that person that is the person Im with. Of course it is a monogamous relationship. we do not live together we do have a conjugal relationship. If you can not respect the woman you sleep with you do not respect yourself.

just for the record, i respect every woman i am with. and being sexually attracted to another doesn't mean you are disrespecting the better half. my point was, if you intended to be friends in the first place don't cross that line and expect to be all happy when it becomes complicated like this. besides relationships aren't just based on sex. thats why it had to end.

HELP ME RONDA I do not understand. KennyG is right move on.