I can't stop thinking about him

Lol. Nevermind.

Idk I felt like a dork! Haha

Thank you cowpuncher ! Lol. (do you really punch cows? They are one of my favorite animals-haha)

As far as what you said blue,
I wonder how i can ensure i have the same affect on him..

Elly, that is definitely the vibe I am getting from him. I often think to myself, does he really like me? Because as women I think we need those conversations, and verbal affirmations.. But then I have to sit and think, well of course he must because a. He kissed me in front of all of his friends b. He invited me to such and such place c. He hangs out with me this much, etc etc.

As much as I would love to ask him where he sees this going, I think I ought to just wait until he mentions it... I have all the patience in the world, but when strong affection for someone has me thinking about them all the time, it gets scary not knowing whether or not they're doing the same. Prob why these males have mastered the upper hand at this waiting game, so that they don't have to be in that position.

Elly, I always look forward to your posts, they are always right on the mark 🙂


@QS

It was less a story and more of a ramble about how I can't get this guy I've been seeing out of my head. I think I compared it to a slow burning candle, as we have been seeing each other casually for months now, but it has become a raging fire inside me (lol !) I came here to let it all out so I wouldn't text him something stupid (which sometimes I do :p ) but then I deleted it as it helped to let it out but I felt silly for blabbing on here about it to y'all.

Thank you guys for your input. I totally get it. I *would* mistrust a guy that was overflowing with romantic sentiments (not until much later in the relationship anyways).

Posted by ellybd

Posted by cowpuncher
Yep. If I say that to you, and you argue about it, debate it, or blow it off... it do *not* find it cute, or a challenge. I find it insulting. Nothing is worse than a woman who thinks she can read your mind because Cosmo tells her so.. and gets you wrong every single time she tries.

Hahaha I actually like the read Cosmo lols. But I'm at odds with it often heh. They had an segment dedicated to 'shit my boyfriend says' things that are supposed to be insulting, dumb or crazy that guys say that makes women go 'seriously?'. I read it and almost ALL of the things the guy said I cracked up laughing and was like "OMG! My scorp would say that, so awesome." Apparently I have a male sense of humor lol.

Yeah the first time my guy told me how beautiful he thought I was, I didn't believe him because of guys I past dated. After that one time though, I realized to not to that anymore lol.

click to expand

Cosmo is so sexist and full of shit.

But I enjoy reading it and laughing at how stupid it is.

Good chuckle.

Posted by everevolvingepithet
I dunno about you guys the other side of the pond, but dentists surgeries etc over here are full of out-of-date chicks mags with the same rehashed/reworded notions of making you feel worthless or not dateable/lovable as the current months.

bahahahha

Posted by ellybd

Posted by Sagittarius89

Posted by ellybd

Posted by cowpuncher
Yep. If I say that to you, and you argue about it, debate it, or blow it off... it do *not* find it cute, or a challenge. I find it insulting. Nothing is worse than a woman who thinks she can read your mind because Cosmo tells her so.. and gets you wrong every single time she tries.

Hahaha I actually like the read Cosmo lols. But I'm at odds with it often heh. They had an segment dedicated to 'shit my boyfriend says' things that are supposed to be insulting, dumb or crazy that guys say that makes women go 'seriously?'. I read it and almost ALL of the things the guy said I cracked up laughing and was like "OMG! My scorp would say that, so awesome." Apparently I have a male sense of humor lol.

Yeah the first time my guy told me how beautiful he thought I was, I didn't believe him because of guys I past dated. After that one time though, I realized to not to that anymore lol.

Cosmo is so sexist and full of shit.

But I enjoy reading it and laughing at how stupid it is.

Good chuckle.

True. Some of the stuff I'm like, omg, no stop saying all men are like that. Jeez. Now marie claire I like. They actually have as many genuine articles that are thoughtful and interesting as they do their silly ones. I never pay for any of them though lol. Just read in the bookstore or online. The only journals I spend money on are academic ones.

click to expand

Right? lol same here

Posted by oldskoolflavor
have you had dreams where he's savoring a pie ?

Question Mark

Okay I've got an update, If anyone has any thoughts about this..

So to get down and dirty in the details,

This is going to probably make me feel like an idiot telling you all this as it happened right after I made this lovey dovey thread lmao.

We had a talk about where we stand with each other. Background info: we had been communicating atleast every other day/daily by text and hanging out twice a week or so for like 3+ months. His first hesitation, I have a son that I care for full time so we only got to spend one night a week or so going out/spending the night together. He has rarely ever seen my son.

Secondly, welp, so when I don't have my son for a night I spend it with the scorp, but I'm also 23 and everyone I know likes to drink, including myself. We have mutual friends so we party with them and I usually drink way more than I should and a lot of the times get a bit sloppy. (im a triple Pisces.. Hhhaaay). Im not proud of this, it's actually quite a down fall to who I am as a person and something I know I need to resolve with myself. As for him he's quite controlled as a scorp so obviously this is a problem and must bring him disappointment about me.

I think it was the passion between us when we had sex that kept me oblivious that these were real issues for him. I guess I assumed these things were being overlooked as nothing changed in the affection dept. One of you on this thread stated that scorps will always be passionate in bed, it's how they behave outside of the bedroom that will tell you how they feel. That rang a bell for me.

So.. He took me out to dinner and we talked. His comment was that he wanted to keep things casual. Which I think meaning he wants to continue having sex with me, but wants me to not be developing feelings for him. That he doesn't want to become attached. Doesn't want a relationship. I said I understood, which I do, but that I wasn't about to continue sleeping with him if this isn't going anywhere.

Well, we left and ended up texting about it later. He said he was a bit "sore" about it, lol. And questioned if that meant I didn't want to continue this at all. I told him that'd like to still hang out but If sleeping together is a key component, then what happens next is up to him. Well he asked me to hang the next night. Which we did and it was fine but I obviously didn't do any sweet sugaring up like I had been.

Cont...

Cont...

He didn't try anything with me, but did sit close with his whole body touching mine as we watched some shows.

We had a good hug when I left but no kiss like we had been.

He initiated a text with me the next day (today) and I went on to explain that I understood moving more casually, but that if he knew for sure he doesn't ever want to be in a relationship with me that he should tell me so we aren't wasting eachothers time. I said that if he isn't sure he doesn't want a relationship and wants to see where this leads us I'm fine to continue hanging out and putting my best face forward so he can really get to know me (without a cocktail in my hand half the time lol..)

So, that's where we are and I'm waiting for a response. :p I can keep my emotions cool about these sorts of things, and if it doesn't happen so be it, I just want to know so I can move on.

If we continue to hang out though, I am actually a bit terrified. My attraction to this guy is unexplainable. Almost painful and uncomfortable and I'm not even sure where it comes from. It's very intense and in a way feels fated for these reasons. I don't even know if I'd be ready for it either.

Posted by LouLore

His comment was that he wanted to keep things casual. Which I think meaning he wants to continue having sex with me, but wants me to not be developing feelings for him. That he doesn't want to become attached. Doesn't want a relationship. I said I understood, which I do, but that I wasn't about to continue sleeping with him if this isn't going anywhere.

Here's your answer. Clearly.

If so, then hopefully that's what I'll hear reiterated when he responds to my last text to him.

You may have to look for it. I'll bet he responds with something that says nothing and something all at the same time.

It's great you drew the line in the sand, but the hard part is not rubbing it out with your toe. 🙂

I'm interested to hear what he responds.

Posted by GemsRaGalsBestPal


It's great you drew the line in the sand, but the hard part is not rubbing it out with your toe. 🙂

Very true 🙂

Hopefully I can keep a strong will because although I was optimistic in letting myself develop feelings for him, I don't want to be made a fool from here on out.

At the dinner, towards the end after I'm sure I made my immediate distance apparent, he complimented me telling me I am adorable. He's never said anything like that before, ever. I'm not going to assume it was completely genuine, as I could see it being something manipulative, but humph. Part of me does wonder if this entire talk about us was a test to see how I would react. We will see when he gets back to me.

Did he ever respond to you? Also, were there any other threads about this dude to give me a little more backstory?

Hey ladies..

So he responded by asking me if I wanted to get together to talk again last night, which we did. Basically all of his hesitation is with me having a child, which he had never mentioned before. He said that I am exactly what he wants in a female and that making the decision to not pursue me exclusively has been the hardest he has had to make in a long time.

He said he would probably be kicking himself in the ass with regret about this for a long time, and that he feels like a coward for not being able to step up and take the risk.

He is the first person ive "seen" since having my son, so this is all very new to me too.

We both agreed that this probably was not the end, because of the unspoken chemistry between us.

I'm not really sure where he stands at this moment, but time will tell. I deleted his number from my phone though, so i don't go texting him anything stupid. I'm going to be patient, and maybe he will have a change of heart. If not, it'll be okay.

Gem, i dont think ive made any threads about him, any that gave any real solid information about us. Its basically what i said above^^ we had been talking just about daily by text, and hanging out a couple times a week, for 3 months or so and also sleeping together for the later half of that time.

We never had any talks of exclusivity. All was good though, no disagreements, just a nice intense bond with each other. Well eventually we had to discuss where we stood with each other, and this is where all of this came up. He said he felt like he should have talked to me about it sooner and i agreed, because to me it seemed there wasn't much of an issue with my single motherhood.

I completely understand his hesitation, it is just a bit sad too, because i really like him. But I'm a pretty tough girl so like i said, if this is the end and he doesn't come back for me, ill be alright.