Of scorpio workaholics and true loves

Hi, this is my first post, so play nice. I'm a Gem girl, optimistic, happy, cancer moon, cancer venus, cancer everything else. Now to jump right in:

I am completely whipped for my scorpio man. We had an instant emotional and physical (oh!) connection. a week later emails were flying, 2 months later we were in bed, 3 months later he had broken up with his then girlfriend (who i didn't know about by the way but yeah). He courted me all the way for the first couple of months, and then, in typical scorpio style , starting doing his own thing. Yes I know about the be-by-myself phases and stubborness and moods, and ive learnt to leave him be.

There are a couple of practical issues

1. He's technically now my manager (8 months after we hooked up because of a merger).I'm not happy coz i can never go anywhere too public with him. He's not happy coz its risky.
2. He's 15 years older than me - im 23, he's 38. not a problem for me, is for him. he constantly thinks i am too young and talented and he's not good enough.
3. he doesnt plan to change his work life style to allow us/any relationship to grow. every free minute he has he will spend with me, but these are few and far between.(he's works 14 hrs a day min, runs 2 startups apart from his day job, and as much as i hate the time problem i love the passion)

but none of this bothers me. Heres my problem:
he doesn't love me. or can't say it, or doesnt know it. he cares, deeply. this i know. this he says, eloquently (only when i ask, of course). but he isn't demonstrative, won't "do little things to show it", blocks me out when i really need him for a deadline, unless its a "true crisis" (what? death?). never fights it if i say "maybe i shd walk away" as he believes i am right in my reasons. i say i love you in words and deeds all the time,as die hard romantic gemini/cancers do. i want to know everything about him, won't talk about his past except in sketchy references, won't show me pics of his exes.

when i finally 48 hours ago, fighting, asked if he ever said it, he says "of course i have i was almost married once wasnt i". i didnt know this. and being a scorpio, he wont elaborate. he simply kept saying "i care for you a lot honey, i dont know what you want me to say".

i broke up - no true love, no future. he says he misses me, and cancer/scorpio, so our feelings are as good as written on banners for each other. we are so good together. am i doing the right thing? will i never be his true love?

Posted by scorpio_chic
For a number of reasons it doesn't look good to me.

Scorpios say what we mean and we mean what we say. If he says he cares for you, he cares for you. If he loved you, he would say that too. We don't throw that word around loosely, it takes a while to get that much out of us. But the good thing about that is - if he ever does say it, you will KNOW, without a doubt, that he means it.

scorpio_chic, I cannot tell you how much I appreciate your response. My heart was breaking when I wrote that post. I haven't spoken to him in 2 days, and i was determined not to be the one who was weak and called first (i always, always do). guess what? he did call just now. we had a conversation i have been longing to have with him for so long. with the love thing, all he said was "i was pissed, its not that i don't love you. i shouldn't have said that."

i, guess, for now, from him, that is enough. i am happy that he did actually listen and respond to what i said.

Posted by scorpio_chic

He doesn't show you by actions (those little things) and he doesn't say it by words either. It would be clear to me that he just isn't quite there yet. I don't get the impression he is in it like you are. You're telling him "maybe I should go" and he's not fighting to make you stay?? That might just be the scorpio pride.. but he could at least throw in a reason or two why you should stay. If he's not telling you much about his past, future, dreams.. It seems that he doesn't trust you like that. It might be the age difference, I don't know. I just don't feel like he is in it for keeps. If he was, you would know without a doubt. Scorpios go hard for what we want.
....
I'm just saying.. God gave us sense for a reason. If a man is not saying that he's in love with you, if he's not acting like he's in love with you, he is telling you that you deserve more, and he is not asking you to stay when you try to leave... in my opinion, that is kind of a no-brainer.

Actions (or NO action) speaks a hell of a lot louder than words. Even when he is not saying much..

this still worries me, so i will be holding back on letting myself get swept up in all encompassing tolerance. scorpios do go hard for what they want. i know he went through a lot before he could bring me into his life with his ex. but he never let me know about it, all he said was "i need a few weeks to get my life in order, i will call you as soon as i can"...part of the ex under wraps thing??

i think sometimes that he mistakes my devotion for weakness or blindness. which it isb't. merely acceptance in that he has flaws, and that it is part of him. the only reason i stood up this time is that this is a deal breaker for me. do scorpios assume non-vengeance to be weakness?

i only ask because i have a feeling this isn't over. at all. he seems a bit hesitant around me after that conversation. probably feeling vulnerable?

Posted by seavixen2
damn sunnygirl..all to familiar to me

if you don't mind me asking, how did your scorpio and you finally end up?