Scorpio Woman looking for some Taurus advice

I have recently been informed by my best friend of 5 years who is a Taurus that is has been attracted to me since the day we met. We met at work and still work together, just in different departments and use to hangout a lot, but there were a lot of issues with out friendship. Firstly, both of us were in horrible relationships and have always talked to each other about what was going on in the relationships. We are now both single and basically single parents and when he told me he was attracted to me I thought it was only physically. I was honest when I told him that I never saw him as more than a friend, but since he was honest with me it has made me see him in a new light. He is almost everything I ever wanted in a mate. I have told him some of the most embarrassing things about me and he has done the same. Here is what I need help with... I hold back a LOT! He says when he is around me by myself he can't help, but want to be physical. I have really only had relationships in the past were the guy ends up just wanting me physically so it scares me that if I am than I will lose him as a friend and possibly forever. In order for me to try to make this work I want to be honest with him and ask him if we could both stop talking to other people. (Since at first I said I only saw him as a friend him and I have still been talking and seeing other people.) A few nights ago I express about not wanting to turn it into physical, but to make it more clear to me, I want us both to continue to keep growing and not talk to other people.

Should I ask him if we should both stop seeing other people and still not be physical because of my past?? I need some advice!!!! I don't think he would ever do me like other men have especially since we are so close, but I am scared to open up and drive him away!

I disagree.

If I'm attracted to someone and I want to start a relationship with them, especially when there's already a strong foundation of friendship, I am totally fine with dating them exclusively. I'd be fine with you saying that. In fact, I'd see it as a sign that you take what we're trying to build very seriously.

The idea that sex constitutes exclusivity in a relationship is really silly. If you feel he might see it as controlling to ask that you two see each other exclusively, instead of asking directly, just tell him your part and see what he says. Just tell him what you intend on doing....If he thinks its a good idea, he'll join in himself. Also, you shouldn't worry about not wanting to be physical either. It may be very difficult for him, but if he's your friend *and* if he's interested in you, he will be understanding and wait as long as it takes.

And please do not listen to busy. He will not run in the opposite direction. If he's your friend for real, especially being a Taurus, he would NEVER run from you over something as minor as that. He may disagree and voice that (which I doubt), but he will definitely not run. If a Taurus is a real friend, you will never have to worry about scaring them away by opening up. That's really fickle/flighty behavior, and with bulls, the loyalty is real and enduring.

Posted by Plato
I understand your fears of being physical but suggesting that he should stop talking to other people is not a good idea. You aren't dating him and don't have control over him, although I know trying to control other people is a natural defense mechanism for scorpios.

What I would do is ask him if he's talking to other people, if you're curious. Start dating him if you want and see where things go. When you get physical or after some time dating then I think it would be acceptable to ask him to be ezclusive

I don't feel as though I am trying to control him. It is more for me and my clarification. He knows I have several people interested in me and I now I am confused if I should stop talking to them so him and I can be exclusive or is it completely physical??!! When we spoke the other day, I was open and asked if it was just physical and he said I spend way to much time with you for it to only be just that, but because he always ends up making a move or whatever you want to call it, it just brings me back to "this is all its ever going to be". It's probably just my own insecurities and I just want to know are we dating or exclusive or what??

Posted by busyeyes88
@OP. I know Scorpios are controlling but your request is taking it way too far and taurus will not be controlled by anyone. You are not in a relationship with him only a platonic friendship and you are not even sure if you want a relationship yet but you want to stop him seeing / talking to others?! Tell your taurus that and watch him run fast in the opposite direction!!!

I appreciate the response. I am, nor have I ever been a good dater. I don't know what to expect and now that it is my best friend and someone I have shared my whole life story with make it even harder for me. I'm such a private person, I literally don't tell anyone anything, but him and now I don't know how to act! Of course, I love everything about him and he is all I have ever wanted in a man, but also scary because I am scared any stupid move I make I will lose him.

Posted by ScorpioBeauty11

Posted by busyeyes88
@OP. I know Scorpios are controlling but your request is taking it way too far and taurus will not be controlled by anyone. You are not in a relationship with him only a platonic friendship and you are not even sure if you want a relationship yet but you want to stop him seeing / talking to others?! Tell your taurus that and watch him run fast in the opposite direction!!!

I appreciate the response. I am, nor have I ever been a good dater. I don't know what to expect and now that it is my best friend and someone I have shared my whole life story with make it even harder for me. I'm such a private person, I literally don't tell anyone anything, but him and now I don't know how to act! Of course, I love everything about him and he is all I have ever wanted in a man, but also scary because I am scared any stupid move I make I will lose him.

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you can't think like that (although everyone does in the beginning). be confident in that he knows you and you have a strong foundation with him. be confident in you too! you have been yourself, warts and all in front of him and he is still there. continue just being yourself. it has worked so far!

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
I disagree.

If I'm attracted to someone and I want to start a relationship with them, especially when there's already a strong foundation of friendship, I am totally fine with dating them exclusively. I'd be fine with you saying that. In fact, I'd see it as a sign that you take what we're trying to build very seriously.

The idea that sex constitutes exclusivity in a relationship is really silly. If you feel he might see it as controlling to ask that you two see each other exclusively, instead of asking directly, just tell him your part and see what he says. Just tell him what you intend on doing....If he thinks its a good idea, he'll join in himself. Also, you shouldn't worry about not wanting to be physical either. It may be very difficult for him, but if he's your friend *and* if he's interested in you, he will be understanding and wait as long as it takes.

And please do not listen to busy. He will not run in the opposite direction. If he's your friend for real, especially being a Taurus, he would NEVER run from you over something as minor as that. He may disagree and voice that (which I doubt), but he will definitely not run. If a Taurus is a real friend, you will never have to worry about scaring them away by opening up. That's really fickle/flighty behavior, and with bulls, the loyalty is real and enduring.

Thats controlling someone! She is not sure if she can offer him a physical relationship! Just platonic friendship, so does she have a right to control him?

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No, it isn't. In the sense that the word "control" is usually used, it involves manipulation of some sort. Here she would just be expressing her desire for them to date exclusively. What is wrong with that? They've known each other for a looong time, they've already gotten to know each other very intimately, just not physically. She should be free to speak her mind, express her desires, etc.

Posted by ScorpioBeauty11

Posted by busyeyes88
@OP. I know Scorpios are controlling but your request is taking it way too far and taurus will not be controlled by anyone. You are not in a relationship with him only a platonic friendship and you are not even sure if you want a relationship yet but you want to stop him seeing / talking to others?! Tell your taurus that and watch him run fast in the opposite direction!!!

I appreciate the response. I am, nor have I ever been a good dater. I don't know what to expect and now that it is my best friend and someone I have shared my whole life story with make it even harder for me. I'm such a private person, I literally don't tell anyone anything, but him and now I don't know how to act! Of course, I love everything about him and he is all I have ever wanted in a man, but also scary because I am scared any stupid move I make I will lose him.

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That will not happen if you're open, and he really cares about you. The fear of it could cause you to close off and inadvertently push him away though. Best thing to do, and the hardest thing for Scorps to do IMO, is just be vulnerable and open.

Busy - didn't you just have an issue with a Taurus who wanted to get physical, prior to you being ready for it?

I think a "proper" physical relationship, will be whenever she feels like she's in a place to trust and be that vulnerable. If the guy really likes her, he'd be willing to date first without that.

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
Busy - didn't you just have an issue with a Taurus who wanted to get physical, prior to you being ready for it?

I think a "proper" physical relationship, will be whenever she feels like she's in a place to trust and be that vulnerable. If the guy really likes her, he'd be willing to date first without that.

Yes. We are still friends. But I never controlled him by saying he could not talk to anyone else!

Then the only way she will find out is to ask him?!

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She didn't say she was going to demand that he not talk to anyone else. But yes, I agree she should just ask him.

And with your guy, so basically you wanted to date, and not be physical? For how long? Can you elaborate on your situation a little bit? And was he not ok with it?

Would you have been ok with him seeing, and potentially sleeping with, other people? While you were dating platonically?

I think you can relate to OP a lot then. Its sort of a similar situation - dealing with a horny bull and not wanting it to just be about the sex.

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
I think you can relate to OP a lot then. Its sort of a similar situation - dealing with a horny bull and not wanting it to just be about the sex.

Yes. It did cross my mind that our situation was similar. But the Bull and I openly discussed. She needs to openly discuss with her bull and maybe that is what she is afraid of ie that he may think she is trying to control him but as you would agree, bulls like honesty and for a person to ask they will get a straight answer. 😄

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Right, but if you tell her he is gonna run away from her, she's probably less likely to say anything...LOL!

Posted by busyeyes88
Yes. It did cross my mind that our situation was similar.

Your Aries Merc ran that thought over...lol.