Taurus man SUPER confusing!!

I love love Love this guy in my life. ( 5/5/1986) and he has been with me for 5 yrs now. We met two yrs before when I was in a domestic violence shelter. But the first 2 yrs I was very lost in my own problems and had no idea of his interest in me. The moment I walked away from my now ex husband this Taurus guy was there through every thick and thin and all my hard and crazy times. the first year with him after I divorced my ex husband was pretty much me trying to come out of my grief so the first 6 months or so I was still just trying to feel him and he was enjoying my company. We would do little acts of intimacy but never got under each other's clothes. The second year we were starting to bond as friends and he told me he once had sex with his ex and got her pregnant and then she had to abort the baby because she was in USA and he was in the Caribbean and he had no intentions to marry her. He stated until he met me he only had girls in his life to have sex with and he would keep that clear. That was very alarming to me. I am old school and I don't believe in having sex before marriage but I was starting to want more intimacy with him. To be on the safe side and because I was into him and thought he was too I asked him to get married the second year and he said it was too early. At this time he had not told any of his friends or family about me. But he had invested his time, money and lot of patience in me as he joined me and my child in all out counseling sessions and he pretty much furnished my entire apartment and spent all his time with me and my child. Third year he heard back from one of his exes who had moved to UK. And the lady was on the phone with him all day and he would talk to her right in front of me about their old times. But he told me he is not a cheater. He will sleep with only one girl at a time. So I knew he was just enjoying the talk about all his fun times with her but I was not okay about it. I confronted him and was not happy with me controlling him. He kept saying there is nothing between her and me and he introduced me to her. Finally the ex got married and they are not in touch as much if at all. The same year his parents proposed the thought of marriage to him and he introduced me to his parents. The parents did not like me because we are not same religion. And that caused so many issues. He lost his job and his year in college because his parents would not allow him to step in my town. It was also the first time he mentioned th

Continuation...It was also the first time he mentioned that he wants to "marry" me someday. But after 1.5 months of stress and convincing he came back to my town and got a new job and restarted his studies. Without him having a job in the beginning I worked hard and he took care of my child and my household without any problem. But 4 th year another ex came into his life and he was starting to flirt with her. I told him several times I'm not okay with that and he would just stay quite. One day he was in the bathroom and I saw messages popping on his phone of his ex sending him kisses and telling him how much she misses him so I checked and found him saying and sending him his pics and same words of affection that he was sending me from his office. I sat him down and told him it's over and I am not having this. His face turned so red and he was sweating all over with may anxiety or what I couldn't tell and he said he will never talk to her again and that he will talk to his counselor and get help for his actions. He has been seeing a lousy useless counselor since the time he struggled with his parents. I believed him. This is the first ex girlfriend he blocked on his phone to stay clean and just with me but there was affection between us. I kept wondering if it was me and my depression and PTSD that I was never perfect enough for him but him not paying attention got me even more miserable. The house looked a mess and he started hinting that the house needs some cleaning to the point that he starting cleaning around himself. But he started talking to me about our marriage and who would we invite and buying house, starting a business together and making babies. Things were still and I was wondering where life is going on the 5th year because it looked stagnant while I was doing much better with myself and chores around the house but my Taurus was never with me it seemed. His head was always dug in porn on laptop or games on his phone or TV . He was half the time not even listening to me and I felt ignored and taken for granted. Then just last month he brought up a talk of another femal he met at work. He said it twice in one conversation that he really likes her. I didn't want to suspect but I was suspicious. I just joked around letting him know to stay away from other ladies. Soon I noticed he was on his phone texting all the time. If he didn't text he checked his phone every 5 seconds, even while eating or watching tv with me right next to him. Then last we

continuation.... Then last week for the first time in 5 yrs he mentioned that he didn't love me and he thought we would eventually marry but he doesn't think it's going to work out and he wanted to move out. I was shocked! And I asked him why the change and he said he still likes me and does not want me to go away but he just wants his time alone. I told him that does not make sense and he said that just how he wants it. He wants to support me and travel with me where ever he goes but not marry me or doesn't love me. I told him if he wants go he needs to go. I can't rely on his support or go back to being friends and make my child forget about him coming around but not living with us. So he decided he will stay with me but he refused to kiss or say I love you to me. Then right a day before his birthday I got really suspicious about him and his texting and being gone for long hours at work. I looked into his phone and found the lady he works with talking about marriage with him. They had already had sex twice in their car and he had gone down on her abd sharing their naked pics with each other and they were looking into rings for engagement and he was telling her he is moving out with her. I got ticked off big time and I decided to leave and yet again he comes home tells me he will drop her. The moment he told the lady that they had to end it she brought up the fact that what if she gets pregnant and I was horrified at the thought that he had unprotected sex!! Now I don't know what's going to happen. I know most of you are going to ask what am I waiting for . I should have left his ass long time ago but I have had a very hard life . If I have to I will take another challenge but this guy now is very very sincere. He drops his phone at me after work so I can check it if I want and he has no contact with his playmate partner anymore and she was constantly texting him so he blocked her messages and phone number and his staff knows about it too at work and he was as if shaken to reality when I caught him and now he is really trying to attempt to impress his boss. He tells me everywhere he goes and the lady he was sleeping around came to his office and he told me he Asked her to leave right away. Then she texted him and he sent me his exchange of texts with her to let me know he is done with her. Ever since he has been paying attention but it's only been 3 days since the day I caught him fooling with this lady. Now he is very respectful and nice but he does not

Uf, this whole story sounds as if you're in a context where women have little access to resources...And history repeats itself. I think your problem is basically summarizes in this, nothing to do with your previous relationship or this taurus man. Are the consequence of what i said, not the cause. Difficult situation and wrong approach.

Continuation...Now he is very respectful and nice but he does not show any affection. He told me he is interested in me but he is too ashamed of him self to even express it. But at night in bed where he use to never even touch me, now he cuddles and asks me in his sleep if I am okay. But in the morning he has no idea about it. He talks in his sleep and j can always tell who's on his mind but this time he is talking to me. Besides the obvious option of leaving him does anyone here feel we have any chance in future? He has now signed up for a couples counselor and he says he wants to build on his character and come out of his guilt. And he wants to start new with me. I am 12/31/1978. I know what most ppl would do but I want to understand this from astrology point of view. If you made it this far, I appreciate you taking the time! Thanks..

TeaMint first of all thanks for reading my mess!! I didn't think one would care but was taking a chance .. I however did not understand what you are trying to say.

Posted by Iya
TeaMint first of all thanks for reading my mess!! I didn't think one would care but was taking a chance .. I however did not understand what you are trying to say.

What is happeningin is, if your are this context I described, then means your history is that certain values —??considered feminine subject only respond to values change in male- female relationships. You must understand this and try to change or accept and signing the best deal you can get.

About feelings sorry but I can not help you even I wanted because if you are not a mildly sovereign person, this logically always be secondary in your priorities list. First survive, no guarantees in any case but in this less and you already know , you're not new on this.

Ok thanks TeaMint. Got you now..

I know what I am playing with here. My entire life has been a battle field and chances from being tried to be aborted by my mom before I was ever born till my Taurus now cheating on me and trying to work on becoming a good person. I was just looking for an astrology point of view from someone here. I know what would help me most is walking out of this mess but I am taking a chance. Just want to know if this is a typical Taurus style of doing things or have I just found me one of the rotten apples among the Taurus men? I don't know how to read a chart or be able to tell anything by someone's planetary placements that's why I put down his and mine birth date. His is 5/5/1986 and mine is 12/31/1978.

Lya, I wish you luck. Maybe others here can help you in the astrological approach, I can't.

I set him free twice. He begged me to not leave and that he had no serious intentions with these ladies and all he told them was superficial. He said he wants me and looks forward to when he can build his character good enough to love me and be with me. He literally gets in a corner like little kid with guilt and almost looks like he will cry when I talk about leaving. That is why I want the astrology side of him. I'm not staying for him or leaving for him. Whatever I do will be for me. I might leave him but I haven't reached that point yet.

I don't believe this Bull is in love with you.

What he feels for you is complacency, security, and safety. More along the lines of a brotherly/sister vibe.
He may not be fully aware of it.
Which is why I believe that he's latching on to you for all the wrong reasons.
Unwilling to let you go.

He's a Bull after all, so there is a part of him that craves that feeling of security, something to feel that void...something he isn't getting from the other women.

You may see this as a positive thing. A leverage over the other women... But don't be deceived. It's not coming from a euphoric state, but possibly from a fear of abandonment or the loss of security.

Do not invest any more time with him.
Once he finds a woman he's head over heels in love with that feeds his need for stability and security as well...

He will have no qualms in dropping you.

The respect is there...just not that 'loving' feeling.

Busyeyes88 - what I am getting read here about the bull character is exactly what I am here for. I am not turning a blind eye on him sleeping with others, it does hurt me to pieces but so has life. I'm honestly in a rock and a hard place right now. My child adores my Taurus guy! She remembers him since she remembers any guy in my life. I'm not using that as an excuse but it is heart breaking. He has cheated but never to the extent to lose everything he had like he did this past month. I was seeing a drastic turning point in him. I was hoping I was right. He did say yesterday morning that he is interested in me but now to ambaressed to even say that after what he did last month. I am sure his counselor will also tell us to separate. But I wanted to hear nonetheless what everyone here has to say about the Taurus in him. Thanks for reading my story and taking the time to comment

TaurusBull1977 - wow! although he has been with me during his hard times, I too have given myself loyally and truthfully to him and loved him unconditionally... Never thought 5 years of devotion and love to a guy could lead to being his sister like relationship.

I'm a Capricorn. What is wrong with me? I don't take none sense from ppl. But I am having the hardest time now at this point in my life. I have been fighting for years in every phase of my life and I am just tired. What will it take for me to come out of this successfully. I am not convinced yet to leave, not because I have hope but maybe because I have no hope with or without my Taurus. Since 5 years we are the most known couple among our society simply because ppl consider me a very strong woman ( which I am so not!) and think of my Taurus as a saint to be around me through all my hard times and love me like he does. I think he is perfect other than the fact that he has remained unfaithful to me with other girls. My mom loves him like her very own son and my family adores him and they all live outside USA so they can't wait to see him. But no one knows what I am going through and I don't know if I can possibly explain because it's impossible to lay out the wounds of my heart for anyone to see.

I definitely agree with Taurusbull1977. I dont think you are what he's looking for and that's why he continues to entertain other women. The taurus in him doesn't like change and he has grown comfortable with you so he may beg you to stay because of that reason. I think you're looking for astrology to tell you what you already should know. It's obvious that you still have issues stemming from your domestic violence history but just because he doesn't physically hit you doesn't mean he's not still hurting you.
Im a Cap too and I went through a DV situation with an aries ex and I have quite a few walls up. If you're not happy, you have to know when to walk away.

Iya,

I had that same situation from an ex bull - be strong. burn that bull.

love yourself should be your priority don't let this taurguy taking you just an option.

You have to ask him what he wants - there you start to burn that feelings as well.

back to my experienced we lived together and privately reading his phone while he was sleeping - I felt

something So I have to follow my instinct - yes I caught him texting a *shemale* - believe me I sent that

shemale a msg using his phone... and started investigating why he is texting my partner.

gosh that shemale even admitting that my partner loves me because he said so - but how can this fucking bull

betraying my trust.? I don't consider this sh!t. So one day we had a huge fight - he emailed me and said

he is now starting to get disappointed with me . I replied his email that he is fuck!ng guy betraying my trust

and acting like a Victim. I want to meet him and let me see you both fuck!ng each other - hahaha. I was really

mad and furious and nasty... gosh. he was like M, I am not ready to tell you everything... I said I was fine

and giving him time. I asked him several times when was the first time he contacted this shemale because we

need to see a doctor for my health - I even told him He might have an HIV. hahaha. Then he kept saying he

had a regular checked up. He even kept confessing his love for me... I will never trust a man who lied

to me and never lied a man who trust me. Then March 23,2015 he started snooping my fb page and sending me

a request to be his friend using another account but very obvious it's him. lol.

I even sent him a msg saying* Aren't he ashamed disguising and I am not one of his kind. lol. He read it

already today 9 am. I am not going to win him back. I love myself and I don't allowed any men to hurt me.

but of course I forgave him and moved on my life.

just sharing...

Capricorn women have a hard time letting go. Too much emotional attachment. not healthy anymore.

My close friend who is capricorn made me feel sad and that she should moved on because her husband left her since
august 2014 and until now she kept chasing him. He already announced he doesn't need her and that he had another

partner and lived with her.. gosh so pity my friend cap and no matter how many times I gave her an advice she

can't even understand.. men think differently than women. So why keep doing what is not working.

I confronted my Taurus with what was said here by some of you. He admitted he had feelings for me once but he doesn't have feelings for me anymore. And he said that is exactly what he is trying to work on but in all the wrong ways and he realizes that. I told him why should we live together if there is no love? A counselor cannot help him fall in love with me. And he said he is not going to the counselor to find love for me but to learn to control his addiction to porn and other female. It was the first time though that I packed up and was ready to call a homeless shelter to move because I have no where else to go with my child. He said he has been clean since April 24 and he is guilty and wants dedicate himself to me because he wants to spend his life with me. Hopefully that will happen if not I am still proud that I did come close to leaving him. I think if I keep at it and don't see any change in his part I will eventually make out the door. I will lose my daughters custody though because my ex is fighting tooth and nail in court to prove me unstable and I guess I am .. Or will be soon if nothing changes between me and my Taurus . Thank u guys, each one of you..

He seemed like a white knight initially but now you see why he latched on to you, especially during such a fragile time in your life. He's was just as damaged, and you were the perfect victim in a way. He's gotten an enabler in you, someone that will love and accept all of him. Thing is, he's building himself slowly getting over his internal struggles and you are his security/his rock...always there as he pushes through to be a better person. You are taking an emotional beating in the process though. You better figure out a way to do the same, if you decide to stay. Once this Taurus feels complete and as if he's conquered all of his internal issues he will be top quality for the next woman while you will be shreds on the inside. Better find a way to make it work for you, find ways to build yourself up because you are doing yourself absolutely no favors.

Im a Cap too, who deals with a Taurus. Like you, Im very accepting. He's slowly building in so many ways, from career to
confidence within himself in various areas. Its good to see the progress but it takes a toll.

He has been the guy so far that keeps making progress and taking me along. It's like every up grade if his he plans my upgrade too. When I met him I didn't even know who I was but today I have more confidence to tell good bye and walk away. He said this morning again to me that he has many women around me but he desires to be with me in the end. He realizes he is addicted to open and sex and wants help for that and he says he at one point had lot of love for me but there was a point where in all the stress with my ex, depression and anxiety mixed with PTSD, I stopped taking care of me and I use to scream at him and find faults in him and he felt he couldn't make me happy anymore and it turned him off and he started looking into other women. But he thought when I get back to normal he will get back with me. He said he agrees that was wrong approach of his but he can't take it back and he wants to fix what's broken between us and have a couple counselor to keep up with his acts until he can do learn to do that on his own but he said he wants me to be more independent, work, study, drive on my own, and do the things I loved to do once and take care of my looks and body. For some reason after divorce I never looked in the mirror, I hid my self from public places and I wore the same clothes all year round and I agree it made me look very shabby. I changed that just recently but he was too busy cheating on me to notice that. Today is the first time he held my hand while watching movie and walking to the store with me..., usually it was always me clinging to him. It is guaranteed that I will lose my daughter if I walk away from my ex because I know I will be a mess and my daughter will be very sad and miss my Taurus too so that will not be hidden from my ex. He has the money to buy lawyers to please him and he will do his best to separate me and my daughter. He already has filed for the motion twice. And I have had CPS come to my house twice and they never found nothing wrong so far thank fully.

Iya,

Same thing with that ex taur I was sharing - he had that porn and women (triple in bed) addiction believe me

he cannot do it with me and no men did it for me - I respect myself and won't defile it because of his

dick. I'd better lose him than losing my life - Apply it to your situation. Don't worry You will be fine soon.

Build yourself don't ruin it just for the sake of love (love isn't there yet).

Know this - If you can't handle your problems how can you handle his problem?

My ex taur didn't confessed me no matter how many times I tried to sabotage the situation.

I know he was afraid of losing me..he cannot stand the consequences and I demand the truth.

so, I was frustrated. I will not deal his stup!dity nor will tolerate his addiction.

I guess what is lacking is *respect* and I value respect more than love. How can a man tell he loves his

woman yet he didn't respect.I cannot validate.

for now, surrender yourself. Embrace that defeat you have encounter. Let that father take care of his child.

The child knows her mother. I know no amount of pain you'll going to suffer but if your freedom is your

last bet of winning that game - then burn it. Be positive. Don't be too hard for yourself. I know if your

daughter and you will separate, the fate will build a bridge to find you and for your child.

for now, take care of yourself. Avoid the ex confrontation. Avoid the bull who have that addiction. it will

ruin your life. look at the bright side of life. Be hopeful. your hope should be to God who created you.

Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional. so choose how you respond to that situation.

Actually , things have been very different with my Taurus lately. We have together joined counseling and we are together going to work on our problems. The psychologist Analysis said that my Taurus is just a guy who likes sex and uses it as a coping mechanism from all the other options that he has to fight against, mainly his family who is very controlling and unaccepting of his free will to be with me. Not only that I did not help much either by being molested when I was a child to getting raped in my sleep several times by my ex which has just got me to the point that sex is a dirty sinful thing and nothing else to me! My Taurus explained to the psychologist that after living with me for 5 yrs he never felt any passion in my love and his sex drive made him do something he never imagined he could do to me! He has had several chances to cheat on his ex girlfriends but he never cheats and that is something we had talked about early on and that's why I did not think he could ever do such a thing. He said he was going to actually completely end it with me and be with the woman he was cheating on but then he had some reservations about that too because the woman is someone who is very needy and needy woman turn him off, plus when he explained her that he had to stop talking to her because he is with me and is raising my child the woman said that my child excuse was bullshit and that was it for him. Ever since he stays away from his phone even though he has blocked the woman. He spends time with me and touches me a lot and for some reason that has turned me on to see him comeback so fabulously. Our psychologist has decided that we both will work on our selves to be with each other with his help and see where it goes in one year or get separated. In the meantime , I am working on my car and education so that if we happen to be separated in a year I will be in a stable position. Last night thought was the first time ever I was able to help him get a hard on and satisfy him with my hand. My Taurus would usually get annoyed and put my hand aside if I touched him cuz he would say the way I held it actually use to hurt him. Something I have never done in my life with any man including my ex. I am 36 and feeling younger than 16 because I finally find sex pleasurable!