Virgo's help me out here?!?! Plz..

my ex Virgo bf became interested in me once again after a long period of time (talking almost 9 years).
We dated each other for a period of 3yrs, was the best of friends, would spend hours on the phone chatting up with each other, however, I found that even though he wanted me to be his "girl" that he wanted to put me to the side every once and a while to date other girls whenever he felt the need too. He would always run back to me. Basically I ignored his calls and told him it was over with me and him because he seem to know want to commit.

During the period of time the we have not seen each other .I had been hearing that he had been still interested in me, and the he had been asking around about how I was doing, who I was dating, etc etc,...

... Just recently we decided to hook up after numerous times of planning for him to come over and hang out without the plans falling through. We ended up being intimate for the first time ever. He seem to be comfortable around me and the vibe was just as if we had never separated. Laughing, joking, the usual...

a day later I messaged him asking when he would like to come back over again and also that I had a great time. He'd said that it was the same for him. After that he seemed to be a little shy. I say this because I would text him normally and he would respond in short messages. I asked him if I had done anything wrong. He told me that I didn't and that he was just busy. I came up front about my feelings and told him that being around him and talking to him again was making me feel closer to him like I used to. He responded that that is why he was acting shyly. He had felt that I was catching feelings and he was backing of just a lil bit. I told him not to be alarmed, and that I just wanted him to know how i felt. We ended up discussing the possibility of dating..and maybe working of a relationship later.

Why would he look for me,pursue me after all that time then pull away. I thought he might have still had feelings for me? (..and yes I know he probably wanted only sex lol..I'm cool with that for now)...

I'm trying not to scare him away... I want to be close friends. I send him nice short messages. "hello, how are you doing okay today?.."just checking up on you". But he seems to be bothered by it.Should I continue to communicate with him or should I let him go back to doing all the chasing lol. What am I doing wrong?

wow how did i end up triple posting lol...forgive me I'm still new to DXP 😢

@DaLionessOfLove....Imo He was testing the waters to see if you were still free and willing.He's testing if you viewed life the same way as you did 9 yrs ago.Did you define the type of relationship that you were going to have before you went horizontal with him?Did you talk about defining anything about seeing each other at all?Did you check to see if he was in a relationship now?If he is,you know what to expect from here on out;more of casual on his terms.
If you say/act like you are cool with the way things are,then that is the way things will be.I know that you are into him,but raise the bar on him.Sleeping with him this first time can be chalked up to lust and curiosity.But from now on make him work for it.Don't give yourself away or he's gonna think that you are the stop after the pub and before he goes home.Think about what you want from this interaction from him.Did you want casual?Okay ,you are where you need to be.Do you wanting dating?Then he has to work for it,real dates,I mean out,listening to music at his house doesn't cut it.Do you want a relationship,then know your self and what you won't settle for.Get to know him better.A lot can happen in 9yrs.Chatting with him is different than being out and seeing his reactions to your questions.You'll see if you both are interested in the same things.You can see his values at work.You can see how he treats strangers,or how he reacts when you both run into someone he knows.How does he introduce you to them?Does he give you a title?
You shouldn't be worried about him being scared off.He should be worried if YOU want him.If you are in contact with him,even short messages,his answer/non-answer should give you a clue to his state of mind.If you think he's bothered vs knowing whether he is bothered ,is the difference from thinking about him from memories and understanding him as he is now.If you knew him better,you'd know if he's very busy,likes/has to talk after work or what his style of communication is.He already knows that you have caught feelings for him.Trust me,he knows.Send him one more message,then step back and let him reply.Hold off and just see,the response time and the content.That will answer some of your questions.If you're thinking of play now then building on that,he may or may not want to put in the work.
Meanwhile think about your heart/body/soul.Love you first.Others will follow.You deserve real love.Good Luck!
P.S warning ,a non Virgo will be here to blast you out of the water soon

When is his birthday?

With Libra placements he can be prone to having interest in exes, hell it happens to me.

"Did you define the type of relationship that you were going to have before you went horizontal with him?Did you talk about defining anything about seeing each other at all?Did you check to see if he was in a relationship now?"

When he first contacted me he said he wanted to "pick up on where we left off". In my mind that was being close friends. We even discussed why I had chosen to leave him in the past. The thing is we used to talk and become close through phone chatting. He calls me sometimes, but I'm to busy to answer lol. So, if i don't respond he will log on to Facebook to rushing me to talk to him lol...weird.

And yes I asked him if he was seeing anyone. He said he wasn't and I believe him. I know he is seeing other girls at the time also . I think he might even have a stalker! He recently posted on his Facebook that some girl was stalking him . Just yesterday his tires got slashed..smdh

"P.S warning ,a non Virgo will be here to blast you out of the water soon"

lol you mean P-Angel...pfft *dust my shoulders off lol*

Posted by Cajunspirit
When is his birthday?

With Libra placements he can be prone to having interest in exes, hell it happens to me.

September 4th...no Libra placements

Sun: Virgo
Moon: Taurus
Mercury: Leo
Venus: Leo
Mars: Leo
Jupiter: Aquarius
Saturn: Scorpio
Uranus: Sagittarius
Neptune: Capricorn
Pluto: Scorpio
Lilith: Taurus
Asc. Node: Taurus

Venus in Leo is another game changer.

Maybe he's just trying to get you to admit you find him attractive, for his ego.
What is the Ascendant? not Ascendant node.

okay I looked up his rising sign:

12 degrees in Scorpio

With all these traits of Taurus, Leo , and Scorpio I can see why he is so possessive lol...

haha... I swear this man is bipolar or something

so he sends me a message today saying that he is "scared" cause I have been sending texts. Wtf...I only asked him what was up and was concerned if he found out who damaged his car lol?!?!...that was days ago lol...

SN: Today I ask him what's up and why he has been ignoring me and that I didn't mean when I caught feeling that I was in love with him but rather that I felt the need to get close like we used to be..he sends the "U are scaring me.".."I haven't checked my messages in two days" *lie* " you sent me messages back to back . and I don't like dat" another lie lol....my messages have been sporadic lol..

i basically replied that even tho he seems to not like me messaging him "back to back" (but yet he bothered me all damn month for a date, even on some days text every few minutes) ...that he needs to check himself and think about how he had been chasing so damn hard...so my couple of messily messages didn't even amount to the pages that of those he had sent me..and that when it to him when some girl shuts him down and says the same to him.

I'm just being concerned about him and wanting to get close again..All his drama has got his head clouded. smh

update: ok so Mr. Virgo is 'getting over " his ex lol..in the most unusual way from IMO..he had been posting status mesages on FB all week about going away to take a vacation, and other things like how he has this girl on his mind but he doesn't know why so he's going to go out and have fun ...(P.S. he'd been posting things about "this girl" since early Feb but I dont much attention to the news feed ..)

But when I messaged him and asked him why he sounds so heartbroken about "this girl" lol..he says

"No lol I'm good I don't get hurt broken but I'm into my ex but I'm doing thing to not text her to let her know this that's all nothing serious"

smdh..poor thing doesn't realize he's in love lol.

I thought Virgo's don't like talking about feelings and hate Drama as well?