Aqua update - He's gone...

Posted by AliCar15
This has to do with him. It has NOTHING to do with you.

I'm not sure why you even brought up his fiance again. It seems like you are continuing on with your character assassination of her in order to justify your position as the "other woman". Not right, and I doubt the people on this board will be sympathetic.

It is common for Aquas to disappear when things become emotionally heavy. That said, I think his disappearance in this situation is 100% inexcusable. He has business obligations and a family to tend to, and he totally shirked all his responsibilities. He's in his 40s, correct? And he is still behaving like an emotionally underdeveloped Aqua? No wonder he is in such an emotional mess. It doesn't seem like he is emotionally competent enough to handle real relationships and responsibilities.

As I said before, I would leave him be. 1. He's in a relationship. People in relationships are OFF LIMITS, no matter what YOU think of the woman he chooses to commit to. 2. He's emotionally unstable/unavailable. Do you really want to be with a man who disappears? 3. Let's say, hypothetically, that his current relationship is actually quite poor. If he is taking such abuse from another person, what does that say about him? 4. He's a cheater. He is cheating on the person that he has promised to marry. 5. He is irresponsible. He abandoned his daughter and business partner when they were depending on him.

As a Leo, who looks for loyalty and security, how on earth can you reconcile all of these facts?

Seriously

sounds a bit weird to meits either a big mindgame sulk or somethings happened hope he comes back soon xx

If it's so out of character and you're all so worried, why hasn't anyone reported him missing to the police?

Let them deal with it. If he's missing for real they'll look for him. If he's just having some time out and the police get involved then he may think twice about putting other people through all this.

It's really not your job to bitch and complain about his fiance. But your freaking nose out of their lives, for goodness sake, you sound like a woman with an obsession for another woman purely because she's in a relationship with a man you slept with.

Call the cops and then butt out.

Posted by deelynn66

Posted by NZAqua
If it's so out of character and you're all so worried, why hasn't anyone reported him missing to the police?

Let them deal with it. If he's missing for real they'll look for him. If he's just having some time out and the police get involved then he may think twice about putting other people through all this.

It's really not your job to bitch and complain about his fiance. But your freaking nose out of their lives, for goodness sake, you sound like a woman with an obsession for another woman purely because she's in a relationship with a man you slept with.

Call the cops and then butt out.

He hasn't been missing long enough to be reported yet. His daughter called them this morning.

I am not obsessed with anyone. I hate her for the way she treats him - just like I have hated many other abusive people who have mistreated friends of mine in the past and the present. I don't have to justify or defend my feelings or opinions on that subject. They are mine and I have a right to them despite what anyone else thinks.

click to expand

How can you hate someone that you don't even know? You only get HIS side to the story, he may very well be as bad as her. Regardless of how she speaks to him, how she treats him, she is his fiance and HE CHOOSES that, so she can't be all bad, can she?

Sure, have your feelings and opinions - we all will too - but just look at what you write and how you speak about a woman you don't even know - and the fact that you happily fucked her fiance because you believe she deserves it in some way. You're as bad as she is. You may not be yelling at him, but your personal morals are as bad, you fucked someone else's fiance. You're hardly a poster child for a healthy minded woman yourself.

Posted by deelynn66
And just a FYI: It's not like we have had this ongoing, consistent, hot affair. We slept together a few random times while he was in a relationship: once in November, once in May, and one time this month. Still wrong, I know. But the majority of the time we spent together was when he was SINGLE. Pft.

Huh? In the same post you said you slept with him while he was in a relationship and then go on to say the time spent was while he was single. Make your mind up.

You know what i think? I think you left your husband in the hopes this other bloke would leave his fiance for you, he didn't, and now you've waged some stupid hate campaign against her in your head because she has what you want.

1. Stop trying to justify the "few" times you slept with him, especially since you're still in his life. You were his mistress...you were the other woman, therefore you being in his life in ANY way is inappropriate. 1 time or 50 times is just as bad

2. It's not your place to judge another woman's report card in terms of how "good" of a woman she is for someone or his family. If that's anyone's place, it's certaintly not yours. You have no room to be judgemental of her b/c you stepping out of your place with him is just as disfunctional & damaging to his daughter as any drama him & his fiance got going on.

3. Instead of carrying on & worrying about his fiance & what she's saying/doing, how about make sure this guy isn't dead along side the road somewhere!? It's 1 thing for an Aqua to disappear from their partner, but it's rare for an Aqua to disappear from EVERYONE. And if an Aqua does that, something must be seriously wrong.

4. Of course it'd bother anyone if they heard a child being talked down to or mistreated. BUT, from the tone of your writing, it seems like this post isn't about finding him & making sure his daughter is ok. It's about you finding 1 more fault in the woman whose place you wanted to be in.

5. If his fiance treats him horribly, that's HIS battle to fight/win, not yours. If you cared so much for him, you would've been his platonic friend, THEN opened your legs to him AFTER he was single. The fact that you didn't means that you of all people have no right to look down on another woman.

6. Half of what you hear about his fiance comes from him. Welp, if he's cheated on her, he's obviously not innocent. He's not the only "bad guy" in the situation. It's possible that he's purposely fed you all these "Sob stories" for the sake of getting you to do exactly what you're doing now: Feeling sorry for him, therefore convincing yourself that you deserve to still be a part of his life. E.I. GAME!

This is a hot big ol' mess....As someone else said..Butt out of his life battered or not, it's none of your business, change your phone number or block there numbers so his daughter nor him has access to drag you into there family issues.

Get a life, and the first thing to get started on getting a life is to shift the focus back onto yourself, figure out what's not working in your own life, fix it and then you can be available for someone whose available and not already spoken for.

Posted by krysrenee7
1. Stop trying to justify the "few" times you slept with him, especially since you're still in his life. You were his mistress...you were the other woman, therefore you being in his life in ANY way is inappropriate. 1 time or 50 times is just as bad

2. It's not your place to judge another woman's report card in terms of how "good" of a woman she is for someone or his family. If that's anyone's place, it's certaintly not yours. You have no room to be judgemental of her b/c you stepping out of your place with him is just as disfunctional & damaging to his daughter as any drama him & his fiance got going on.

3. Instead of carrying on & worrying about his fiance & what she's saying/doing, how about make sure this guy isn't dead along side the road somewhere!? It's 1 thing for an Aqua to disappear from their partner, but it's rare for an Aqua to disappear from EVERYONE. And if an Aqua does that, something must be seriously wrong.

4. Of course it'd bother anyone if they heard a child being talked down to or mistreated. BUT, from the tone of your writing, it seems like this post isn't about finding him & making sure his daughter is ok. It's about you finding 1 more fault in the woman whose place you wanted to be in.

5. If his fiance treats him horribly, that's HIS battle to fight/win, not yours. If you cared so much for him, you would've been his platonic friend, THEN opened your legs to him AFTER he was single. The fact that you didn't means that you of all people have no right to look down on another woman.

6. Half of what you hear about his fiance comes from him. Welp, if he's cheated on her, he's obviously not innocent. He's not the only "bad guy" in the situation. It's possible that he's purposely fed you all these "Sob stories" for the sake of getting you to do exactly what you're doing now: Feeling sorry for him, therefore convincing yourself that you deserve to still be a part of his life. E.I. GAME!

Whoop there it is +1

"I am done with this. It is not just HIS side of the story. His daughter has confirmed what he says, so has his family members and friends. NO ONE understand why he stays with her. I am not alone in my opinions and feelings about not only his fiancee but their relationship as well. "

It's none of your business...

Your morals may or may not be intact but you definitely fail in the "having boundaries and standards" department.

Seems you're in deep denial as well...