Confusing Aqua

Things seemed to be going well. I apologized and told him that my feelings for him are deeper than he might probly think. He texted me later that it's nice to know because he doesn't wanna be the only one with feelings. He started texting me sweet messages such as goodmorning, and when I said, oh you were thinking about me, he told me he's thinking about me all the time, etc. His birthday is on valentine's day so he was celebrating with his family or that's what he told me. He wrote me that night and asked about me and how was my v-day. I told him I was working n missed the party I was invited into, he said it's ok since we both couldn't go. Lol. I don't know if he was joking or he was showing some signs of commitment to me. But then there's this girl in school who likes him and well I don't know if he likes her or not but I got very jealous when I saw on fb that he commented her pic of saying how pretty she was even I don't consider her attractive at all. But oh well. And I'm not possessed because he's usually friendly with all the females might flirt even he doesn't like them like that. I do feel there might be something going on between them but I don't know. Then why the hell would he tell me he has feelings for me and be with someone else? Do you think he's playing now or he's really still interested in me? Or not? What are his motives? He's confusing me... and do you think I should ask him about her, but then I don't want him to think I'm a stalker. 😢

Well one, calm down. Don't make more of an issue out of this than it really is. 1. He's NOT commited to you, thus the worst thing in the world to do is hold him to the same standards as you would if he was actually you're man. Even if you two decided to become exclusive, there is no real harm in him complimenting someone else. If a man thinks a girl is pretty, he's going to think so whether he blurts it out to her or not. If ALL he did was compliment her than I'd say you have nothing to worry about. However, if your intuition is telling you that something fishy is going on between them, then obviously I'm always going to advise someone to follow their gut instict. If they've had a history before or if you feel he's doing the same things with her that he is with you, then it's understandable why you'd be confused. BUT, either way, don't start looking for things to get on him about. As the saying goes, if you look for trouble you'll find it. If he's spending time with you & is focused on you, then him calling another girl pretty shouldn't threaten or compromise what the 2 of you have together. And if you are unsure about how exclusive or not you & him are, then just ask him. I wouldn't necessarily admit to him that you were snooping around on FB, but you are generally entitled to know where this is going with him. And instead of guessing all day or analyzing everything, you'd be better of just asking him where this is going. You'd be suprised, he might catch you off guard, be honest with you & tell you what you want to hear. And if he agrees that you & him are exclusive, then you need to make it clear to him the kind of things that bother you or confuse you. Communication is very important & yes, while you might fear his reaction, the effort you'd put into atleast being up front with him about things has a bigger pay off & a larger gain long-term. Don't try to supress this jealousy or this confusion b/c it'll only enable you to make something out of nothing. Just be up front. If you're ever gonna be with this guy, you'll have to get used to being honest & open with him anyways. Why not start now?

And there's no such a thing as a dumb question. These are the kinds of situations that can make/break a friendship or relationship in the beginning, b/c how you both deal with truly getting to know eachother & seeing each other's true colors can/will determine the fate of how far you 2 will go with this in the future. Asking him about her isn't necessarily the problem. It's all in your delivery. It's all about HOW you ask him. If you come straight out & say, "Who is this B you're complimenting on FB," of course that'd be a bad move, b/c you'd send the message to him that you were 1. snooping for stuff & that 2. You're already jealous. And the problem with sending him those signals this early on is that just in case there is NOTHING going on between him & that girl, he'll be quicker to be turned off by your jealousy if he has a clean & clear conscious. The best game to play is NO game. If you are strict about stuff like that, then be real. Hell, if you two are ever going to make it official, he'll end up seeing that side of you anyways. It's important for YOU to know up front too (about him) that when you have a concern, you can open up to him, be honest about things & get the clarification that you need. If you can't even do that, then you're already dooming the communication part of the friendship/relationship (atleast on your part). Follow your heart but then again don't let jealousy or insecurities be the source of your intuition either. At this point, all you can do is ask him about it in a way that doesn't make him feel pressured or like you've got a magnifying glass on him, & just hope that he's as honest & upfront with you as possible. That's all you really can do is hope for the best. Once you get your answer & once you both open that dialogue, you'd be suprised, you might've been trippin' about nothing the whole time, thus you 2 can let it go & move forward OR he'll slip up & lie, thus either way he'd still be doing you a huge favor by revealing his true colors to you & making it easier for you to see his real intentions. You're in a win/win depending on how you look at things.

Hey I got what you mean. Of course I wouldn't even think to flip out on him. First we're not "together" and second, Him commenting her picture is not a problem but it adds more suspense because I've been visiting her profile for a while and I started to sense that she was into him. She keeps adding almost all of his friends and in her statuses she keeps saying tonight with baby or something like this. One time she put her status; When will I find a guy who'll treat me right? and he commented,' you will, just keep looking. That was like a month ago. Then she puts these depressing statuses cursing out some guy and then her girlfriends have added him to their friends list. I'm positive she's into him. She even put her status written in language he speaks but she doesn't so it's obvious it was dedicated to him and status meant something with heart. Could it be that he might be trying to make me jealous? Because if he suddenly after these talks that he'd never change his mind about me, starts liking another girl why would he still act like he has feelings. And that time when he texted me and when he told me that he's thinking about me all the time, I told him how should I believe that. Then he told me because he texts me all the time, which I agree he USED to but then stopped. I told him but he never wants to see me and he said, of course I do now that you're talking to me. I mean maybe I was closed off too much, maybe I should of given him more attention in the first place. But I don't understand, if he's interested in that girl, why would he act like he's still interested in me. As much as I've observed, I decided he's not the kind of guy to want couple girls at once. At the beginning he was crazy about me, showed me attention and seemed like every friend of his would talk about me with him, even call me by his last name. Now it's not there anymore. I haven't seen him in school this week yet. I don't know if I should be the one texting him first or should I wait for him to text me first? What do you think....

And he never comments other girls pictures. This one comment was: omg u look soooooooooo pretty baby =) I think she rather looks trashy, trying to look seductive with these boobs out. I thought at one point that he was being sarcastic n that he knows she likes him because that night when he commented her pic he was chilling with his buddies. But again, maybe I'm analyzing too much. I really can tell the truth from lie. I feel mad inside but I can't express it coz he'll know I was stalking his profile but then I don't wanna put up with this crap either. He tells me he has feelings for me but is involved with someone else? That doesn't make much sense of why he'd do it, maybe to hurt me?...

I was right, there is something between them. And I think he likes her as well. She posted on his wall today, hiiii you need to call me! (= you called before but my battery was dead. ttyl

do you think it would be a good idea to delete him from my facebook? I already deleted his number even though I know it by heart :/

I don't care if he comes back, by that time I'll probly be happy with someone else or enjoying single life =) maybe overall it wasn't that I liked him that much but just it intrigued that he stopped chasing after me and lost interest. At the very beginning I didn't wanna get to know him. I remember how he'd go all crazy asking my friends about me, but I'd just tell my friends to do something to make him fuck off of me because I was interested in someone else and didn't think he was even my type. But he still continued to pursue me n huh when I showed more signs of affection he backed off n found someone else. I didn't treat him right, I didn't praise him like a lord like he's used to to getting attention from all the girls. I feel bad about telling him that my feelings are deeper than he probly thinks. coz Now they just died. Seriously at this minute I don't feel anything for him. Maybe I wasn't sure with my emotions n just made myself think I liked him when in reality I enjoyed getting his attention. But oh well, at least I'm not upset or feeling destroyed like other people feel when their feelings are not reciprocated in the same way. It's funny because I used to think he'd never leave because he used to be so into me. And he would even tell me he'd never change his mind with me. People would say when he looks at me he looks with that sparkle in his eyes, like I'm really someone special to him. But heh life's to be enjoyed n not stressed over things. So I'll focus back on me and things I need to do.

I don't know about that.. I'll probably just keep him. I don't wanna show him that I bother about him. He's the one who chose her over me, oh well hope it makes him happy. I rather keep my image mature than do some crazy things such as showing how pissed I could get because of him losing interest in me. And when you said they come back.. what did you actually mean? How do you know he's coming back to you and only you or he's just checking on you?...

No, I don't need him back. I'm not a doormat. If he couldn't handle the way I was then it's his loss now. I'm not gonna be his toy. There's plenty of fish in the sea and I'm sure there are guys who would do more to get you. And I already told him my feelings and did my part. The reason I told him how I felt about him was because I felt that maybe I've done something to hurt him that made him distant but the truth behind this all is that he had lost interest in me long ago but wasn't man enough to let me know in some ways. And at the end he just added even more flame by responding to my feelings, saying he's always thinking about me and etc,. I kind of believed it but when I found out that he's involved with another one, he really disappointed me to the point that I've lost every atom of interest I ever had in him. . . I'm glad there's facebook and that I found out early enough.

And I still haven't figured what caused him to lose interest. He was hinting that I don't talk to him so I guess it might be that. But when I become emotionally drawn to someone, I become verbally detached. I start becoming afraid of having intimate bond with that person for some reason and thus maybe the fact that we didn't start off as friends but as lovers. We kissed on our first date lol. I was over his friends party and I got too much of that baccardi and when I was dancing with him, according to him, I kneeled my head towards his n kissed him! Anyways I don't remember quite well the facts. We made out that night but that's all. I also remember him saying at the very first time we hanged out with our mutual friends, he was saying that every relationship should have jealousy and that if the partner is not jealous then he/she doesn't care. It's what his beliefs were. We were all just randomly discussing relationships and stuff.
Anyways, now I'm really done. It's for my own emotional wellness. It's just when you finally start trusting someone, they bring you down like this.
Oh and by the way that girl is gemini. So no wonder he found his better match..

Well I do agree that your antlers should've gone up the minute you realized that things had changed b/w you two. That's normally an indication that either things are moving forward or backwards. BUT, when it comes to this other girl, you've got to give him more credit than that. You said it best yourself, you two are not together thus unless you've both established an agreement on being exclusive, he's technically not doing anything wrong. And her just being into him doesn't necessarily mean that things are the other way around. After all, you like him, so it shouldn't be necessarily so surprising that other women might have the same level of admiration for him. As far as her looking trashy her pics..hey, some men are attracted to that. What some women consider trash, a man might consider the jackpot. That's just how it is. Sounds like your intuition is playing the biggest role in all of this moreso than what you've seen on fb. From what you've shared, it does seem like this guy is def. playing the field, but that's what happens when the women that the man is dating start to fear what'll happen if they lay down the rules or establish some boundaries. The truth is, if he was really dedicated to you, it wouldn't matter how many other women were attracted to him b/c he'd make it known that they were no threat to him nor you. It's obvious that he's def. giving this other woman alot of attention, but then again there's also a very fine line here. He's not in a relationship & technically, there is no crime in giving another woman a compliment, regardless of how ugly or trashy others may think that person is. I think you're doing the right thing by seeing those "signs" & by walking away. This all depends on how much you really want him. On 1 hand, you might get the clarification & exclusivness that you need if you just open up your mouth & say something about how you really feel, even if just for the sake of knowing that you got it off your chest. On the other hand, sometimes it's best to just let your intuiton do the talking for him & walk away.

And at this point, you are probably giving just as much attention to her page as he is. Sure, you may not technically be "stalking" her page, but no matter how technical & wordy we get, all that matters is that you were starting to look outside of your friendship with him to get answers & THAT is usually where things go wrong. This woman might have a crush on him & she might be dedicating certain statuses to him, BUT one thing she's doing that I can't blaim her for is that she's focusing on him & not worrying about other women. It may not be that he's trying to play you or lead you on. He's single & he's entitled to date around. A man dating around when he's single doesn't mean he's going to be unfaithful or do the same things when he's in a relationship. This other woman might even know about you but she might be keeping his attention by strictly focusing on him & going after what she wants. And some men, good and bad, will sometimes pick the woman that is showing him the most flattery & love. Of course, we women can sit around all day & say, "Eww, what does he see in her?" but doing that won't change anything especially considering his opinion & his likes are what really matters. If you feel that he is showing you his true colors, then walk away. Saying something to him about it at this point would be pointless b/c you've already decided to stop trusting him. Communicating about boundaries & lines being crossed is only effective if the conversation happens before the trust dies. At this point, your intuition about things is too strong, that him explaining himself won't matter or necessarily turn off that "warning" bell going off in your head. As the saying goes, "Better her than me." If you really feel that he is playing games than don't try to analyze the who's, what's, when's, why's & where's, b/c you'll just drive yourself crazy. If he wants her, then let him have every bit of her. BUT, on your part, stop looking at her page. Getting your clarification about him through her fb page is not the answer b/c there's always the chance that she could be giving shoutouts to someone else or be playing the field with him too. Just walk away. Your intuition is telling you right.

And from a man's point of view...a man can't read a woman's mind. If he's dating multiple women, while having feelings for 1 or maybe even 2 of them, it's the woman's responsibility to step up & establish her list of boundaries. If she doesn't then he'll just assume that how he's handling things is okay & that there's nothing wrong with it. Men respect women who have the courage to stand up & be honest about what they really want, even if that means putting them in check. After all, he can't stop doing something that he had no clue was bothering you in the 1st place. At this point, this man either trusts & likes you or he doesn't. You opening up to him about boundaries shouldn't be the make/break of your friendship, b/c if it is, then you 2 weren't going to last much longer anyways. Sometimes all it takes is a simple conversation & agreement on how exclusive or independent 2 people will be while dating; that way you'll both know what to expect from eachother, while also knowing where the other person draws the "line." If you 2 can't even have that conversation now or atleast establish that level of communication then there's no way for either of you to know those limits, thus neither of you can get mad if certain lines are crossed. You don't have to call him & admit that you got most of your info from the other girl's page. You shouldn't even have to get into the details about how you know about their flirting. If it's killing you to know so bad, then just come right out & ask him if this girl & him have any attraction to eachother farther from friendship. He's either going to tell the truth or he's going to lie. And hey, let's say that they really do have nothing going on; it's still understandable that it's just as unnacceptable for it to LOOK like something is going on, even if it isn't. If he stopped stepping up to the plate with you, then THERE'S your confirmation that things won't work out. Her FB page shouldn't have the control over how far you & him go b/c the things on her page are things that you'll never know for a fact. And as women, the "what ifs" & all the guessing drives us so freakin' crazy that it's not even worth the time or the trouble. If you're not going to open up to him about how you feel then do both yourselves a favor & just walk away..on to the next one. You deserve better babygirl

krysrenee7,

I appreciate what you're saying, we're really thinking alike. It's just I've been feeling stuck between not knowing whether to move on or just try a little harder. Of course, sometimes what I think is not what it is. Not always you can trust your intuition, especially I'm the kind of person who tends to over think things a LOT! But again I might be right. It's just a matter of knowing the truth which can be found by communication and only he can tell me true.

Anyways, couple days ago I finally made a decision. That's it, I've done my part, told him how I feel, however things have not progressed anywhere. He's either playing the field with both of us or he's interested in her more than in me. So I decided to move on with my life and not bother thinking about him. Well guess what happened, he called me a day b4 yesterday, however I wasn't able to pick up since I was in class and he left me a text message; HI. I texted him later that I was in class and he said ; its fine I was just letting you know I got my phone back. Then yesterday, out of the blue he sends me his picture. I didn't act excited n didn't throw these words oh cutie patootie. Coz I was still determined to move on. So I just said hey how r u? He thanked me for asking maybe he was expecting for me to say omg ur soo cute or something like that.. He asked me what I was going to do that night, I told him I had no plans, neither did he and he couldn't figure out what to do. I thought he wanted me to suggest what to do but I never initiate anything with guys so we both ended up doing nothing. He's the guy so if he wanted me bad enough, he'd have figured out what to do to see me. I don't know. I hate this, because when I finally decided to give up on him and move on, he appeared in my life again like nothing happened, however he wasn't communicative as I'd have wanted. I texted him this morning saying goodmorning sunshine, and he replied goodmorning to u too cutie. I know I shouldn't of slipped n should of continued with my decision coz it made me feel like he still wants me but I'm just not sure what he wants me to do. I'm stuck at this point, honestly I'm feeling like going with a flow for now but is it right if I do that? I'm afraid what if I'll get burned later again =/ I'm confused. I still want him but I'm afraid he's playing. What do you think I should do to attract him towards me more?

In other words, I feel like ball may be in my court, that it's depending on what I do that will determine whether he'll choose me or not. But I feel I'm emotionally drained already from everything that has to do with him. I'm sick of what I had to go through. I know he obviously has no clue what emtional mess I've been living at. But I've tried, I told him I have deeper feelings for him than he might think. HE responded positively that he has feelings for me too. But then if he has something going on with another girl n he liked me, wouldn't he cut whatever was going on with her n focus on me? And obviously if he lost interest in me, why would he still contact me n do surprising things? Such as calling me, which he never does, he only texts me or sending me his pic. I feel he might be confused at this point himself n not sure what he wants. But I gotta let him know that I can't hold on to this coz I've got my own life n If he doesn't show me clearly what he wants, I have to move on. Because it's either he's mine or goodbye baby. I ain't into games. There are more men on earth. N I def gotta let him know that.

I wish I only overanalyzed it LoL. It's just the fact that he used to show me so much of the attention n then stopped left me confused and wondering what happened and why? Is it normal or something's going on? There are many women he talks to and might flirt but I always knew that it's just the way he is and I shouldn't worry because I knew I was the one, at least at that time. But this chick n her statuses made me think something might be up between them or I know for a fact she's got something on him, I'm not sure if it's the other way around though. But he used to ask me out or to hang out and it's been 2 months that he hasn't. If you read my previous threads you might see, but I know you're not interested in some stranger's story to go through my history n analyze it LOL. So anyways, I like the quote actions speak louder than words and I'd like to dedicate it to him. If he tells me he's always thinking about me, that he has feelings for me, then why the hell he doesn't initiate to hang out or spend time together. I don't know where this is going. If he likes me, are we just gonna be standing nowhere?

Yeah since I've started liking him, I feel I've lost too many thoughts on him, my mind has been focused a LOT on him. I need to shift it on more important things. So that's why I've been thinking to move on coz I got tired from looking for the answer. But I can't blame myself for thinking about him. Isn't it something that everyone goes through? I guess U just need to be able to control it. I'm occupied a lot with school and work. And yes, I do wanna attend some dancing class club and learn how to play a guitar and many other things. I'd love to travel if I had money. Not everything you wanna do is possible if your pocket is empty LOL. But it's just that we haven't been hanging out for 2 months n I don't know what's the deal.

Well I do agree that it's ok for some women to expect the man to initiate things. That's understandable. BUT, if you know deep down that you being too stubborn to initiate anything could possibly cost you everything with him, then that's when things turn into a game. It's okay to have your expecations or viewpoints on who should do the chasing in certain situations, BUT (and this is to BOTH of you) when the stubborness, pride or those flexible expecations start to get in the way of things, something has to give. B/c as you said, if you both continue to be stubborn, then nothing will ever move forward & if nothing ever moves forward, sure you'll still have all your ego BUT your most important goal wouldn't happen. So when it comes to stuff like that, you've got to figure out if saving face is more important than taking that risk & actually getting what you want. That's your call. On the other hand, it does seem like this guy is SHOWING you better than he can tell you how he feels. Sometimes, it's not about what he IS saying to you that you should go off of. Sometimes it's what they DON'T say that paints the true picture. Either this guy heard you out, knew you were dead serious & thinks he can still have you w/o fulfilling any of your wishes OR this guy hasn't given you what you've asked for b/c your demands weren't spoken loud enough. It's either 1 or the other. Either this guy heard you out & is chosing to ignore your concerns OR this guy isn't giving you what you want b/c he's still not quite sure about the specifics of everything. And even though, we'd all like to hope our partners/friends should automatically "know' what to do & how we feel, the truth is that you can never hold someone accountable for hurting you or disappointing you over something that they had no clue would hurt you. You don't have to beg him or make yourself seem desperate in order for your voice to be heard. But then again, you don't have to be so stubborn or so demanding of him to read your mind either b/c as you can tell, when either of those things happen, a lose-lose situation creates itself & all that's usually left is confusion & the diminishing-by-the-day friendship/relationship

I'm an Aqua so I understand what it's like to analyze things so much so that I unconsciously add more worry or imaginable factors to a situation than necessary. BUT, then again, there is a huge difference between what your heart is telling you & what your mind is telling you. Your intuition lies within your heart. Your intuition will always be there regardless of what kind of personality you have. Your mind however can become so complex & so changeable so much so that you might even confuse your intuition being the same as your changing emotions. Your intuition is what told you something wasn't right. You're MIND & personality (how you handle things when your intuition is tugging at you) is what is causing you to over analyze so much. So make sure you don't convince yourself that your intuition must be wrong as an excuse to ignore it all together & fall for everything he says & does. And hey, even if your intuition was telling you that everything was fine, you'd still notice that he's just not giving you the amount & level of communication & dedication that you're asking for & that you deserve. And THAT is the problem. Now the ball is in your court. You've already voiced your opinion & he has/had to make the choice of either compromising to make sure you were satisfied (which is what a friendship/relationship is all about) OR ignore your requests & just hope that things will blow over. Either way, now that you've seen that he isn't giving you the quality that you're asking for & that you deserve, the next step shouldn't be to sit & pressure him or bug him about it. Trust me, he knows exactly what he's doing & he seems pretty content with it, especially considering how laid back he is about everything. If cute & sweet words are what can completely make you ignore your intuition or forget about what REALLY needs to be said, then this will never work out between the 2 of you. If you feel that he will never give you the real truth about his dealings with her, then move on. And if you know that him even saying something sweet or something "catchy" that draws you in then do what you've got to do to avoid being in those situations. Whether it's not read his texts or cut him off completely..whatever works for you so that you're not enabling him to continue to feel he's entitled to stay around even if he doesn't make any progress or give you what you want

Right now it seems that you are more focused on the "why's" & "who's" instead of the "WHAT IT IS." And that's the problem. I'm not saying that this is your fault, BUT I am saying that you have some of the control here. By all means, if you don't like what you see you are in the position to walk away at any time. So if you make the decision to stay around (for whatever reason), then it's only fair to him that you put to rest the issues that made you want to stray from him the 1st place. It's okay to be honest about things, even though the average person knows doing so would probably result in one or both people having to walk away. At this point, you're so miserable b/c of all this guessing & b/c this guy making you use your imagination due to the fact that you feel he's not being up front with you or atleast isn't clarifying things to your satisfaction. And hey, that sucks BUT at the same time, he's showing you his true colors. So when a man shows you who he is, you have to believe what your eyes are seeing & what your intuition is telling you. Right now, you're spending so much time worrying about who else he's establishing a foundation with moreso than actually spending this time to establish a foundation with him. So like I said earlier, if you're going to give this other woman any power or if you're going to entertain her fb page, then you can't get on him for doing the same thing. Sounds like you don't want to let go, BUT that you know you need to. Sounds like you're running off of "hope" instead of actual fuel with this guy. And what makes it even worse is that he's not even properly responding to it all. This is the point where women either mess things up & enable the rest of the friendship to diminish OR when women save themselves from future heartache & just walk away. That choice is yours. You've got enough proof that this thing with you & him just won't work out. If you're waiting on him to actually say the magic words & confess to something that he might've already decided to hide from you, then you'll be "waiting" for a longggggg time. And as you can see, once you start "waiting" & feeling like you're all alone in something, your admiration for him will turn into resentment, lack of trust & lack of proper communication. Any time you have to start questioning yourself just for the sake of keeping someone around, the friendship/relationship was already over. I know it's hard, but just walk away b/c if you don't, it'll all be on you

@Leo~Moon~Beam : You arent damaged goods and for starter, you arent goods, you're a human being who has brain and body and probably "soul" (don't have scientific proof for this yet!) . The guy already said he didn't want a girlfriend so sleeping with him was your choice, pls don't feel bad about it. Was it good sex? Did you enjoy it? If you did, why took it so seriously?
He's just a guy, why is it important to impress him anymore? Why do you need him to see you in a different light? You're who you are, be confident and happy about it.If he can't handle you, he's a fool. Yes, it's important for you to be who you are.Boundaries are only good when they're for you, not for him.Love yourself just as equally as you love any man and you'll see the difference. The standard is for yourself, not anyone else.

Wow girl, you really gotta get your confidence back. I know life throws many situations where things can make you feel worthless. But you can't let anyone use you, hurt you, or put you where they want. I understand now, we all make mistakes and yes sleeping with him was a huge red flag but what's done is done. You can only learn and move on to the next one. There's no point to keep holding on and hurting yourself even more when you know you're not gonna get what you want. You really need to get yourself back together and step up as a really confident woman. Drop his ass off and find someone else. Next time, you'll know better not to sleep with a guy but instead wait until you establish a trustworthy relationship with him. As much as you'd like to think that you'll be able to control your emotions later only develops into different; emotions start controlling you. Thank god, I didn't sleep with this guy at least. However, I learned from the first guy I dated a year ago. He took advantage of me and even though I knew I was doing myself wrong, something kept me from doing what I thought was the smartest and best thing for me to do which was to walk away. It took me awhile to surpress all my emotions and to do what my brain told me to do. One day without looking back at what happened and not considering his words to get me back again, I cut off all ties with him. He still tried to get me back but I ignored his ass until months later he found a girlfriend and I think they broke up couple months ago. He still texts me sometimes or even called before Christmas but I didn't wanna talk to him. I knew he hasn't changed and sex was probably the only thing on his mind. But I realized I'll never ever let any men treat me the way I don't wanna be treated. That's why before getting intimate it's better to become emotionally close with him. U must develop trust in him and know him like your five fingers before investing in him sexually and emotionally.

I'm not saying you two are not meant to be. Maybe later in life, who knows what the future holds us. But the only way for you to have a deep level emotional n mental relationship would be only when you two develop a friendship first and thus later on proceed with animal instincts. LOL
Gosh it was hard for me to resist this aqua. But I did and I'm happy that at least I don't have to depend on him physical which leads into emotional n mental dependance. Especially when things are not good between us.

Well my aqua has been showing me some weird type of attention this week. Like he'd text me at 10 in the morning to tell me good morning cutie but wouldn't initiate more conversation. Although I try not to get excited about any type of attention he shows me because I know it might really mean nothing in the end. So I'm just acting my usual. I let him know already what I feel, if he wants me n needs reassurance about something, he'll come to me and ask me, otherwise I guess he does not. Really there's nothing wrong when your feelings are not reciprocated in the same way. That means he's just not the right person for you. It means the right one will come later, maybe not now, maybe tomorrow, maybe 20 years later, Lol that'd be too long though. But I try to have positive thoughts in my head about everything even when the hardest hits you. I listen to the music that inspires me and gives me emotional boost. But I don't let bad emotions take control of my life that easily. Just because someone might have stopped liking me does not make me feel guilty or worse about myself. I listen a lot to Beyonce and her songs just somehow make me feel sexy inside and out 😉

Oh my phone did such a stupid thing today, I forgot to lock it and it sent 2 empty messages to aqua. I hated myself for a minute because I thought he might think I did it on purpose to get his attention. Lol. But later I realized what does it matter; if he likes me he should enjoy it, if not ; oh well too bad, no one's gonna hit my head for it. He texted me; thanks for that lol. And I sent him sorry message half an hour later.

By the way he was playing soccer yesterday and from his facebook status I saw that said he won't play soccer for long time because he hurt his knee. I didn't wanna seem like a stalker so I didn't text him to ask about it. However he deleted it today so I didn't feel I should ask him about it anymore. Who knows maybe I didn't even see it lol..

Actually I'm realizing that maybe what we had wasn't enough to make a big deal if it's not working out. It's only been couple months. However, I'm sad because I honestly love to be chased n get upset if a guy loses interest. 😢 Maybe it's really him stopping to chase me was what got into me , not exactly being upset that he might not like me anymore or that I really wanted something with him. I start to feel that maybe I didn't have that connection with him. And I skipped learning more about his personality n instead I've been focusing on who's that girl and why he's been acting this way towards me. For now, I know I'm not gonna contact him n if he does I'll just keep it warm and friendly but just continue without any expectations out of him. It's what he does that should trigger my interest. Not the idea of having him or losing him.

I know what you mean hun, I've been there. It took awhile to realize and to completely cut him off from my life. He was capricorn and later on I was dating this great virgo guy but I still had my thoughts about cappy. I mean maybe he wasn't jerk, it's just that he didn't give me commitment and I gave him my virginity. It was a bad decision but I learned my mistake. It was just not meant for us to be. I shouldn't probably even worry about this aqua anymore. I just hopped on this board to see if there's anything I can do because I made myself believe that it was my fault for things not working between us. Hey maybe it was, but now I've done my part. I let him know I was sorry and that I like him but he's still not doing anything that would lead towards us becoming close as we used to be. I was thinking maybe he's distanced himself because I hurt him, but he told me he 'forgives' me even though he's still being kind of distant. But it's most likely coz he's got interested in someone else. And I understand. I didn't treat him too well but what's done is done. I don't think there's anything I could do to change things, and even if there is. I'm just too tired to put anymore energy. Things should come naturally & that's how I want a relationship to develop. . .

I don't know why I'm coming here, probably just to vent myself 😢 I almost had a feeling that things had started getting better and he's stopped being mad or upset. He started coming closer and I pushed away again! I told him through text that I really liked spending time with him but he just died.. and he told me he didn't die but I was just cold towards him. And that's how it ended between us. I saw on fb that girl's pictures and he was in one of them. So I was right all the time. He was with her but he wasn't man enough to tell me the truth! He lied to me about his feelings. How dare he was to do it. I'm a human being. Don't I deserve to at least know the truth? It's way much better to know the ugly truth than knowing that you were lied to. It's my fault for trusting him. I had trust issues before. After I met him, I started to feel that this guy would not hurt me. All the things he did. Telling about me to his family that I'm the only girl and blah blah. huh I really felt after this crap. Well all I can say, this guy did a really great job, he had pretty good skills at how to make me fall and hurt. We have a spring break and he's going to Miami with his friends and her. I hope I don't get to see him ever ever again but sucks that we go to the same school. I really wanna transfer somewhere else. But heck no, why should I bother? I'm just gonna show him that I'm strong enough not to bother that he's here. I swear all men are assholes!! U think you've found the good one. You really start believing him, because how come such a nice, honest, and sweet guy wouldn't be a good catch? Huh.. the truth is they have mastered the skills and no matter how much you think you've analyzed through him and 'seen' how he is. Almost all of the time, he's the opposite of what you think he is. God all these kisses, hand holding, cuddles, affections, serious talk about future, jealousy, acting like he cares was just a bull. And I almost gave up to him but thank god I was smart enough to say no. I'm so mad at every man, I'm never ever gonna trust any again. I rather be alone and single than be unhappy with some jerk. I wanna cry myself out and wash my tears with bottle of tequila right now! That's how I'm feeling....I wish I could kill all the memories I had with him. 😢

Hi. I'm back here again. I know you probably may call me mentally crazy or something. Well, it turns out I was wrong that there was something going between Aqua and Gemini girl. He called me last week from Miami, however I missed it. Then I texted him yesterday coz I knew he got back from Miami couple days ago. Convo was simple. I asked him how he spent his time there etc. Then he texted me later to ask if I was doing anything that night. I told him I was chilling with a friend and asked him if he's got any suggestions. He texted back saying that's a good question lol maybe. Well I texted couple hours later and said; Are you teasing me? I told him I'm not getting vibes from him that he wants something serious...and blah blah.. he kept asking me why I say that and so on just to get something out of me. Then he told me that he gave me a chance and he didn't get back anything 😢 I told him I was scared and asked him if I ruined it. He said there was nothing to be scared about, he doesn't think I did, but I did some of it. So asked him so...? And he told me he can't say anything through messages, that he has to talk over the phone or to see me. Well we agreed to meet that night. I was nervous to meet him so I had couple shots of vodka before he came to pick me up from my friends house. I started to feel dizzy in his car and I don't even know how I talked or acted. I know I tried to keep it simple and didn't bring anything up thought to wait till he does. Well he asked me what's up with these statuses on my facebook, such as I bruise easily so be gentle when you handle me.. lol he remembered. And some other few. And then we went over to this club. We hugged and told how much we missed each other. And when we left the club, he drove me to my house. Spent some time in his car. We started making out, and he brought up talk of why I didn't say hi to him that time. I told him I was mad because I thought he found someone new and he said no. Well we were talking of other non important stuff to mention and then started flirting and things lead hotter. He got under my shirt...and somewhere else. Well we were both so ecstatic and he wanted for me to go "down" on him or that he could on me. But I got mad, said is that what u from me.. I got ready to leave his car and said well hope u find someone who's gonna go down on you. He didnt say anything and I left. Once I got into my house I realized I left my cell in his car. Called him from my mom's cell and he was waiting

there anyway. Well he opened the window and I took my cell from his hands. He didn't say anything or try to talk to me about it. So I assumed well he was just playing with me or what? Did I do something wrong or what you think of this? I told him while we were texting that I like him but I think he was playing me... however through our text convo he popped a question if I was drinking , I guess it was too unbelievable that I said stuff I said.. I told him no. I only drank afterwards n right b4 he came to pick me up. He noticed I was acting drunk in the club a nd I told him everything I said to him through texts I was still sober...

I don't understand. I guess I shouldn't of just left his car like this, maybe should of said something else?? He was so warm and affectionate that night. He turned his attention to me from his friends. Ughhh what can I do? did I do something wrong again? 😢