Go off my brains or ignore?

Im back again need help with this aqua girl i've been posting about.

Everything seemed to be fine until I asked her last week why she always avoids seeing me? And why I can only see her when shes out with her friends but even then its always a fat chance. She ignored it and never responded (this was via emails). I left it alone for 1 day thinking she needed space and time to think of an answer. Fine. Two days later I sent her an email saying that I know shes gone MIA because of what I asked her (im trying to cut this short) but its bullshit how she can choose to avoid and ignore me and questions I ask her because she doesnt feel like she wants to respond. I told her its bullshit and its not fair and if I did it to her she'd get pissed off but she can do it to me whenever she wants, to put herself in MY shoes and understand where im coming from. Told her that she knows im waiting on an answer as to what I asked her and that if she never spoke to me again then so be it but I wasnt going to chase her. Also told her that this email wasnt a threat nor an ultimatum but that I was simply trying to convey in a manner i thought SHE would understand where I was coming from and how im feeling. She didnt respond to that either (i figured she wouldnt) and she dissapeared for 5 days.

Monday morning comes, she emails me first thing in the morning acting all normal like nothing happened. I decided to play along and acted normal too she was being all nice and sweet I was telling her how i was so stressed and shes like babe TELL ME whats stressing you? talk to me babe I want to help you, so anyway I told her and then I thought id bring up the topic of her avoidance to questions etc so im like you know im still waiting on an answer as to what I asked you the other day. Surprise surprise, she doesnt respond. So im like sweet. I let it go for a few hours just as I was leaving work I sent her an email going "are you serious (her name)? K sweet."

Tuesday morning she emails me the EARLIEST she's EVER emailed (must've been the FIRST thing she did when she got to work) and this is what our emails were:

her: hey what do you mean am i serious i was in a meeting till 5 and i left work? You need to stop analysisng things

me: And what exactly do you think im analyzing?

her: well you think im ignoring! so you are analyzing the situation i was in a meeting!

me: Aha well im sOoOoOoOoO SORRY for analyzing but that's what you leave me to when I know you have a habbit of
conveniently —ignoring?? and —avoiding?? me and things I ask you when you feel like you don't wanna answer. So if I
cant get a straight answer from you, only thing I can work with is analyzing what I think MIGHT be the situation.

In any case, whatever. You say your not ignoring so im just gna wait for an answer to what I asked u and don't ask
me what it is coz u already know.

her: im off to (area) msg you when i get back

She never got back to me and still hasnt. its been a day now.. So, she's either completely NOT interested (which I dont think is the case because she's SHOWN that she does like me) but I just dont understand why she wont see me one on one? Im pretty much over this situation and over her. All this game playing has REALLY turned me off but I hate giving up on something that i've been chasing for so long so should I ignore her if she makes any contact? OR should I send her an email going off my brains pretty much and telling her to never contact me again and just forget we ever met because her and this whole time we've been talking has just been a waste of time and I wasnt going to put up with her stringing me along anymore.

Okay "someone". Wrong choice of wording.

Can you ellaborate on your response?

I think the best thing for you to do is to move on from it all.

You have chased her for so long - but you haven't caught her. I'm very doubtful from reading the above that you ever will. She won't give you a chance to meet up one on one (for whatever reason) and therefore you are never going to be in that position that you need to be in. You haven't been able to establish any alone time with her. It's always with her friends - and even then it's still a "fat chance" of it happening.

The best you can do is not ignore her as such; but certainly keep yourself busy and see what else is out there for you. It's not like she is bombarding you with messages left, right and centre. There's no point being all wound up about this situation - you just have to accept that she won't give you a straight answer on that question that you asked.

Well then why the fk does she continue to come back?? If you dont like me, you have no interest in me then why bother?

I thought aquas wont even give someone the time of the day when there not interested but if "they continue to come back" it means something?

From what I've been reading she has kept you at a distance - that would signal that you guys are acquaintances and nothing more.

You asked a pretty fair and simple question - and she has just avoided it entirely. Swept it under the carpet. She's gone MIA.

Then there's this:

"her: im off to (area) msg you when i get back" She never got back to me and still hasnt.

"she's SHOWN that she does like me" - Can you please give examples? How has she shown that she likes you?

I know she made that up and really didnt go anywhere just to avoid the question.

Okay, she's told me previously that she likes me, I was at the club with her once with HER friends and she was ALLLLL over me, kept on texting me everytime she moved to a new spot so I could go find her, wouldnt leave me alone the whole night (I mean if i didnt like someone I definately wouldnt be doing that not even for "attention").

She sends me sexy/dirty photos of herself. Sometimes without me even asking for them but IF I do ask for them she's more than happy and she's like you like them baby?

She always initiates contact through either emails or text. I stopped initiating any contact a LONG time ago and I just wait for her to come to me. She always asks me 100 questions when we talk (i feel as though she trys to gain inside info in a sublte manner). I told her once that her friend was hot and I was attracted to her (as a joke just to see her reaction) she ignored everything else I said and asked me "so you like her more than me?" I replied telling her that no I dont and I was just joking, i dont even find her friend attractive in any way.

She invites me to places but never follows through.

She sometimes opens up to me and tells me about her family problems etc, opened up to me and told me her ex bf recently bashed her (his obsessed with her and stalks her) and then she goes please dont tell anyone etc etc. Once i was going through her phone when she was with me (we used to have class together - thats how we met) and she had my facebook profile as a favourite and book marked and I go "aha, stalking me are ya?" and she nervously laughed and goes NO!! i have all my friends as favourites and book marked. I was like mm okay.

She's previously asked me if i'd get jealous if I saw her with someone else

She flirts with me. Always compliments me. When im having issues she wants me to talk to her about them so she can "help me solve them"

The night I was at the club with her (mind you we werent even drunk), I slyly put my hand up her skirt LOL and like kinda pinched her ass and she turned around and smile at me like a kinky smile.. I mean if someone I didnt like did that to me, they'd be getting a massive SLAP across the face!

She's stuck around for this long its been about 7-8 months. If she wasnt interested wouldnt she just not bother coming back? The longest she's ever dissapeared has been like 1 week and a half. Otherwise it wil be 2-3 days

She's also asked me if her friends knew about her and if they said anything.

Because the night at the club, she introduced me to her friends but I didnt introduce her to mine..

Maybe she's not sure she wants to go totally lesbo with you. Is she secure enough in her sexuality to do it? Don't think so since she has ex-boyfriends so maybe she likes to play but won't go all out with you. It's not easy to go there and come out if you become an important part of her life.

Posted by Mistery
Maybe she's not sure she wants to go totally lesbo with you. Is she secure enough in her sexuality to do it? Don't think so since she has ex-boyfriends so maybe she likes to play but won't go all out with you. It's not easy to go there and come out if you become an important part of her life.

Well see its ME that is trying out this whole "liking girls". SHE is bi sexual. She told me when we first met that she was straight, then tried being a lesbian for 2 years, and then just went bi but that she "prefers girls anyday".

So she was like whats your story and I told her i was curious about girls but never BEEN with one. And anyway we kept on talking and then once she asked me "do you even like girls".. and i go to her "i like you." and then she goes that when I said I liked her it got her excited and then from then she started sending me all these naked fotos of herself etc etc and ofcourse, I went along with it.

So its not ME thats trying to get lesbo with her. Im just trying to experiment. Shes the experienced one.

And even once she put her arm around me and shes like "i'll take you out one night with my friends to a gay club (most of my friends are gay) and see how you like it". I was like yer.. okay... but that never happened.

It sounds like she just likes the attention. I think you should move on without telling her. Just cut her off cold turkey.

yeah I would just leave this alone for awhile...

Posted by candyapples88
It sounds like she just likes the attention. I think you should move on without telling her. Just cut her off cold turkey.

I agree. There are enough complications with either pure gay or straight. Bi's are the misfits, disliked by both gays & straights for their wandering nature. Way too many options and confusion. But I know you've been pursuing this girl for a while and yes, she should take you under her wing if she is the more experienced one but why is she holding back? Ahh, more confusion! Another man or woman? Or is it the bi nature? Not sure if they like men or women totally or the individual... Ambiguity is uh, vague so bi meets bi and there is vagueness. Bi usually meets gay with the gay eventually pushing the bi to make a decision because gay will not have a problem introducing you into their lives. But another bi isn't sure and a concrete relationship can never be established. Bi's usually just have encounters with each other which usually ends up in a threesome with one or another's boyfriend and the only one who really benefits is the boyfriend. Your bi girl will pick him in the end since it's more socially acceptable. See the road you're going down? It really would be so much easier if you just picked gay or straight and have a spontaneous, drunken bi experience when the opportunity presents itself.

She's flattered that you're after her . . . leave her & move on to something well worth your time.

. . . if you leave her high & dry . . . who knows, maybe she'll chase you down. arf!

Mmm Mystery you make some good points! Thing is I DONT want a relationship with her and I've told her that in the past. I was like look just because I like you doesnt necessarily mean I want a relationship or anything with you. I just wanna be your friend and get to know you better and I wont lie, I do want to get physical so take it as a kind of "friend with benefits" situation. And she was like "i feel the same way".

So I mean she knows I dont want a relationship so i dont understand what her go is. Maybe its her venus in capricorn freaking out? lol.

Yea Kleo, sometimes when I go for a period of not contacting her or she can 'sense' im shitty at her she'll chase me and she'll be all sweet and nice etc etc and she just reels me back in! And I always come back because I just KNOW if she gave me the chance, we could BOTH experience/have somethig CRAZY and AMAZING together and I KNOW she feels it too. Our chemistry is OFF THE CHARTS and i KNOW its not one sided or all in my head. When im around her ahhh I just I dont know I feel some intense shit I cant explain and it kinda freaks me out lol. And then once she hugged me hello heaps tight and I just FELT something instantly and I asked her lol i was like did u feel anything when we hugged?? (hoping it wasnt all in my head) and she was like yes i did i was like what did u feel? and she goes I cant explain it but I just know it felt right.

Ahh fuck it whatever. Shes played games for too long. Usually I would have given up a LONNGGGG time ago but with her I dont know its different. Maybe its the whole aqua/gem connection? Anyway yea im just going to ignore if she contacts me and leave it at that.

Posted by PandorasBox
nice tatt btw

thanks 🙂