HE KEEPS COMING BACK!!! Aqua GuyTaurusGirl

As many of you know I have tried to walk away from my Aqua several SEVERAL times. This time I made to the point of not contacting him at all. We did the email thing for awhile then I stopped that as well. Then he decides to call me to ask about a text message I'd sent..oh...about...TWO WEEKS BEFORE!!!!
We started talking. Cleared the air about somethings and I thought that was it.FINALLY OVER..right? WRONG!!
We talked the next night and he took a call on his other line, took too long to come back and I hung up. My cell rang the next morning at 7:15. I looked at it like it was on fire! ( no one calls me that early!) Then when I saw his name I almost fainted! He wanted to apologize for being rude and taking so long on the other line. I was blown away! He has called me more in the last week than he has since we first met! Its like he doesn't really want me..but then he does..But he definately doesn't want anyone else to have me (I figured that out from the email content and his obsession with my old relationship.)
Can any Aqua give me hint about what da HELL might be going on?

I'd love to hear about this too! Aquarius men can sure confuse me!!!

They do feel guilty easily.But yeah,as far as relationships they can be very confusing.They will know they love you but do something that shows the complete opposite.Completely understanding one is only for other aquas to know,pretty much,and I have found that they are more emotionally driven then astrologers give them credit for.

I'm wondering if it was that I walked away and meant it that snapped him back into reality...or...if he came to his senses on his own. I am afraid to believe anything cuz we all know I could be back at square one at anytime!

I'd wait until some of the aquas are posting I haven't seen anything from them today.They could help ya more.

Thanks B913. But hes far from stalking me. I've been stalked before ( by someone else) where police did have to get involved..this ain't it. (Thank God!) Its more of a cycle where he will basically ignore me and when I break up with him because of it...he will go away for awhile and then find a way back into my life...ONLY to lure me back in to ignore me again. From what I hear its classic Aqua behavior..I just can't see why if he wants to be with me..then Just say so! If not..then just say so!

But I do agree he is out of his mind though!! 🙂

KocoaHauntis sounds to me like you may be a "challenge" for him. I HAD and encounter with a male Aqua and at first his behaviour was foreign to me. He was there as a good friend and then POOF***** gone for a few weeks without saying anything. Our relationship was one from the "outer limits" and as time went on and experiences created - understanding gave me knowledge.

Cannot tell you how many times I ended the relationship and thought is was "done and dusted" only to have him create a way back in.....yup, I fell for it many times and then without warning....I caught on to the "game". Agent 0913 may have hit the mark. In any relationship if one person needs for the relationship to end then the other person in respecting the other persons request should honour that person. If not, hmmmmm something may be up. No doubt obsessive behavoiur is being demonstrated here. If you really do not want contact with this individual you will need to stick by your word and let him know that you mean business. He will still keep trying. I ended my situation back in Sept. and he still tries to find ways to contact me. Perhaps his ego is not happy that I chose to end the relationship....I don't really know and it really does not matter...what matters is that I wish he would honor my word and move on....this is HIS problem not mine. It is up to you ....stay strong KH!

Hopefully Alana will stop by and share with you her awesome thoughts on the Aqua behaviour....and do keep in mind that this may be this persons problem and not due to his sun sign.

Install the NO CONTACT Rule !!!!!!

I havent personally been with a aqua male, but I know I have done something similar to somebody. long ago, I wanted them, but I was scared. didnt want to admit to things, I couldnt make up my mind. I at one point wantd to be close then I needed my space. nothing was wrong I just wanted space. I think getting a wake up call was helpful, made him realize some things. I tried ot push my ex away, I would be there ont he phone daily,,then suddenly..I didnt want to take his calls, but yet I wanted him, I confused my self. Turned out, He made me realize,,and asked me,,what do you want,,do you want to loose me. do you want me out of your life, I actually sat and thought. for once. No I didnt want him out of my life, but I felt smothered. yet I wanted him around all the time. what was I being smothered by? not affection, I wanted that,,it was commitment. weird huh, I was afraid he wouldnt stand by me, and leave,,so I was trying to be the first one to keep his close, but not too close in case he left..well we got married, but he left anyways. ugh,,even after he worked with me on admitting what I needed and getting over the fears,,,here,,it wasnt ,me ,,he left,,he wasnt ready for commitment,,omg,,what a turn around..anyways..Im confused still about my actions. sorry if I cant be of help ..hope things work out. just take each day as it comes.

I have been through the same situation with my Aqua girl. In and out, in and out, going on for 3 years. You have to ask yourself what you want. If it is out, then it is permanently out. Aquas are confused in love. When I was too close with my Aqua, she felt smothered and ended the relationship, when I was gone she wanted closeness. The best way to deal with an Aqua is to ignore and lead your own life. Do not have too many expectations. Just live day by day your own life.

I never wanted to end my Aqua relationship, because I love her too much, so I have played her game. I am a Scorpio and I do like playing games too!! But it is an emotional merry-go-round and it takes a heavy toll. Can you take it?

Dear Kokoh......it's never quite over for an aquarian!
I am not sure if you were the one who actually finished it or was it mutual or if it was him.
If it was you, then's that "the nub of the matter". Nobody dares to finish it with an aquarian and gets away with it for want of a better word. They do the final walking and the final talking!!!
It may be that he's sweet-talking you to get you back into his world and then once he knows he has you, he will leave.

Another possibility is that aquarians like to remain "friends" forever with their lovers even if the departure ended badly.....give them a few weeks to cool down and they will get in touch with you to test the water and try the friendship thing - perhaps it's that.

Another scenario is that he really does love you, reckons he's made the mistake of his life and wants you back....but as you know aquarians will never say this initially and upfront - it will be mind games for a while until they see how you really feel about them.

So kid, I just don't know.....if you do want him back, you act the "I can take you or leave you" attitude for a while...this will drive him crazy.........making sure that he knows you've have to go here, there, everywhere....with A, B, and C. If other people find you so dam attractive and you are so in demand, then he will too big time.

If you don't want him back and no contact whatsoever, only you can do that by telling him probably with quite harsh words - to go fly his kite elsewhere....

If you want to know what he's feeling - the jokey-feely approach is best to get the real suss out of us....you could jokey jokey say on the phone...hey Mister, you're calling me so much these days, it seems you can't live without me!!!! You'll know from his response, if what you have said is true.....joky joky back means YES.

GOod luck K.

A x

Wow..AquaKisses and Alana have execllent points. I know he wants me. I can feel it but he either doesn't know how to express it or is afraid to. He had one major heart break a few yers back and he has never been the same. He loved this chick more than his next breath and she DOGGED him!! I told him I know that situation has something to with why he runs from his feelings. He didn't conferm or deny..he only hung his head.
I know by the way he panics when I end things that he does feel something. But its something that he does not want to admit to and I don't try to force him. He will write me beautiful emails but will not say the same things to my face or by phone.
I notced that when we made contact after the first time I left, I let it be known that I had been out on dates. He kept bringing it up in a "jokey jokey" way. I said "Hey if I didn't know any better I'd think you were jealous." He made some whitty retort and I knew that he was jealous. I was surprised cuz I figured he couldn't care less.
So I remain confused. Him coming back is not so much the issue I guess. I can handle that part...I just wonder why if only to possibly ignore me again at some point?

Thanks, I try to make some sense. WE aquas tend to not admit to emotions, and from personal experience, when burned it is hard to trust again. Trust is a Huge and I mean Huge factor for me. I also tend to show my feelings more on paper or email than face to face. just when I start writing, it comes out more. not that I intend to not be able to tell a person how I feel. I tend to be shy- amazing isnt it. but I clam up and when faced with reality I have a hard time opening up about my self, like personal feelings and thoughts. But once that barrier is broken,,its much easier. Put on the spot may help,,but also may not help,,touchy areas. Your man is saying what he truly feels on email/paper/phone dont doubt it. just pray for patience, Your Aqua man will come around. and when he does, it will be worth it. he is dealing with past issues of not wanting to get hurt, but yet he knows you wont hurt him, but he has to convince himself to open up to you like he wants to. to get a Aqua man to delcare his feelings in writing isnt a easy thing . stick by him, if you can handle the ups and downs. Good Luck

AK 🙂

So how should I handle his...Behavior...when it comes to me dating other people. He knows that I date and its strictly because hes not around. He always has something "smart" to say about it. Its a touchy subject but he is always the one to bring it up. It causes huge "disagreements" and I always leave the convo wondering if it was our last. I refuse to sit home and wait for his call like a fool.

Hi there KH 🙂 I just read your post and felt the need to respond because there is something that I am not understanding in this situation.

As Dr. Phil says...."So, how's is working for ya?" I may be perceiving this all wrong and forgive me if I am but, it seems to me that this situation is not working for you...."how should I HANDLE his behaviour" why would anyone in any relationship want to "handle" another person's behaviour? why not accept him for who he is? If there is one thing I have learned it is one cannot change another person....if you want to change him to fit your needs than he is not being accepted for who he is and most likely the relationship will not last.

Why would you want to sit home and wait for his call? You do that Missy and you have given all of your God given power away to him - I know you won't do this b/c you sound like a very wise woman. You have a life and a wonderful one at that....why not find someone who looks forward to being with you and does not leave you "wondering?" but who leaves you with a good feeling when you both have departed from one another.

Another thing that I have learned is when a relationship is good...there is no asking others questions about it....there is no doubt - only a quiet knowing that all is well.

Another thing I have learned....is sometimes rather most times many of us need to go through the experience to FEEL so that we have understanding of the lesson to be learned.

and....to end my post another lesson that I have learned is that sometimes others do not want our advice or care to hear what we have to say - I understand this and will not be offended....just wanted to share my thoughts. I know that you will make the right choices for you and I truly wish you the best in this situation and the future ones that you are yet to experience.

Best of wishes,
FB

You are absolutely right FB. I do date in hoping that I will meet someone else who will be all of those things. Its not working for me and truthfully my brain has given up but for some reason my spirit believes and keeps letting him back in. Its not a cop out...its just the truth.
I know me and eventually I will just walk away without warning. I'll just get tired and say the hell with it. Like I tell my friends who are in bad relationships and ask me for advice...I say they have not left cuz they are not tired yet. Whne you are truely tired Jesus himself can't get you to stay.
I just wish I knew what he wanted, you know? Why does he keep coming back?

"I just wish I knew what he wanted, you know? Why does he keep coming back?"

Very good questions Kocoa and I too used to ponder over the same questions with my Aqua pal. I did ask him those questions and his answer was, "I don't know." He knew....we all know - maybe we just don't want to admit it. Everyone one of us has an intention before our action - there is something that we want. For me, I learned to not listen to his words but observe his actions and there the truth was given to me and once I understood that, it no longer mattered to me what he was thinking but what I was thinking and what I needed to do for me - that was important.

Not sure why he keeps coming back...in my situation it was because I let him. He only came back when he wanted to and when it was good for him - yep he was a selfish sort but I had no one to blame except for myself. Anyone will try anything and if we allow it then it will continue. As you said, I finally became tired of the games and wanted to move onto more "real" relationships that were balanced. It can be hard letting go but it can also be one of the most powerful things one can do for themselves to better their life.

Lessons...this is just an experience - one of many and most likely this experience is getting you ready for the next one so it is all good.

Kocoa - I'm not so sure that it is about getting tired but more like being struck with an "ah-ha" moment...the lightening bolt of wisdom strikes and the mind is changed and then we by changing our mind, change the situation. Take time out for you...what do you really need for you to be happy and then make that happen!

"This is my life. It is my one time to be me. I WANT to experience every good thing."

Maya Angelou~

All so true FB! I know time will tell everything. I plan to ask him outright as well. Its time he faces whatever hes "feeling". I'm not worried about the outcome...whatever will be will be. However hes still calling or making contact everyday. Thats a huge improvement. No false hope here...still just watching and wondering...WTF is going on??

Hi Kocoa,

Remember.. Ground him! help to keep him on 'level' ground.
Don't take anything he does seriously. Don't try to analize him.. if anyone is doing the analizing.. it's us aquarians that is only allowed to do that.. we don't personally like to be analized ourselves.

He keeps coming back! he's interested. Make him be resposible for what he is doing.. tell him you are 'not' playing games.. either he's here to stay.. or he's gone.. which is it?

Aquarius Female

Its been seven days since I spoke to him. We had plans last saturday and of course no call no show. There comes a time when you are forced to see a person for truly what they are. It has nothing to do with him being an Aqua. It has everything to do with him being a disrespectful jerk and a lying dog!
My peace comes from knowing that God sees all and what goes around comes around. Its painful. But its not like he didn't show me who he was a long time ago. Due to his consistant pursuit, I found it difficult to believe. I realize now I fell in love with the person he made me believe he was in the beginning. That person never really exsisted. Like Iyanla Vanzant says "When someone shows you who they are...believe them!"
I refuse to contact him eventhough I am so angry and hurt I could burst! I want to read him the riot act (again), but I figure why even waste my energy. He doesn't care.
I thank you all for being so kind to me during my journey through stupidity. Prayfully the next time I post it will be for happy reasons.

hi dear KocoaHauntis....

i was in love with an aqua too....
it is really a very confusing relationship.mine was similar to yours.he never wanted to show his feelings before evrybody...so he kept shouting,discouraging....for no big reasons
but at the same time wrote very sentimental poems in emails....i tried my best but i'am too tired of it.....

u need a lot of patience to deal with him.....it takes time....to understand what they truely think of you.....

reading about aquarius will help you to handle him.
my advice is be ready for mind games...
ignore him....he'll come to you..

sangeetha

Thank you Sangeetha. Its been about a month and I have heard nothing from him. I really don't plan too. I know I mean nothing to him. My anger and pain come from not knowing why he needed to play mind and heart games with me. I really get angry when I realize that I told him to his face my love for him...he declaired he would be different...then he hurts me again. I will never ever understand that. But like I told him at the time. "I don't expect anything from you. I only need to give you the information. What you do with it is your own business" He chose to spit on it.
However, life goes on and I do think about him everyday and shake my head.."why?" Day by day it gets better. Still knowing that he still may pop back up..as aquas so famously do...makes me even more sad and angry. Right now I am more comfortable with him just staying away..tho deep down I miss him so much.

KH, it sounds to me like he wants to remain friends. But, that you are the one who wants to consider this a "love relationship". There are certain rules we establish when we are in a love relationship, behavior we except or not. And the same is true for friendship relationships. There is a thin line that Aquarians tread between love with sex relationship and platonic (friendship) love relationship. With an Aquarian you have to be especially specific in defining what you expect in a love relationship. Now, an Aquarian can maintain a platonic relationship with an ex-lover if that ex can handle it. However, you tend to present him with a challenge as a lover by telling him that you are dating and then letting him come back after he has talked his way back in. Also, I haven't heard you say that he's dating, although like a rubber band he stretches his legs a bit. To him you are playing a game, so he's
playing one too. I know that as an Aquarian female, I tend to be very amenable in the beginning of a relationship and sort of let things happen, very calm and upbeat. All the while I'm checking and listening and observing everything I can about the other person and not really talking to much about myself unless asked. Because of this laid back attitude some people tend to think they know what I'm thinking, but inside their are so many dubious feelings, so many anxious feelings that I need to detach myself from people, situations, etc. in order to sort things out, make some sense of my emotions as well as analyze (play back conversations, etc.) without outside intrusion.
This is just the way I personally operate but remember Aquarians or not everyone is an individual. I hope what I've said is understandable.

Peace

Waterbearer you can't be serious about him wanting to be my friend—? I didn't play games with him. I was giving him his space by walking away. He would freak out...lure me back in just to leave again. (I got the emails to prove this) Now tell me...WHO WAS PLAYING GAMES—? I was nothing but honest about my feelings and what I wanted from him. He had plenty of chances to say it was too deep for him for he wasn't feeling me the same way. I would have been fine with that. But instead he chose to string me along and play with my heart cuz he knew I was weak for him.
If you read everything I wrote you would see that I said that what he did has nothing to do with him being an aqua but everything to do with him being a lying dog.