Make up your mind

Ok I have threads here regarding my Aqua guy and me the Leo lady. It's been 4 months that we know each other, not dating yet intimate but not in a relationship. I'm a very strong Leo and I never hesitate to tell my feelings to him. Despite of this Aqua really have never disappear on me. In January a few days after his birthday, I told him that I will date other people because he still don't put a label on us. and though he kept on saying that I'm not a booty call, FB or fwb and I know he only see me. I can't be waiting on him till he's ready for a relationship with me. So days have past, he still text me everyday, didn't really stop or disappear even though he knows I will start dating another man. So when I did have a 1st date with this Leo guy I told Mr. Aqua, he was surprised but still continue the normal convo on text that we always have. So Aqua left on 2/13 for deployment and I have not talk to him since. But today we started texting again, he sent me pics of him and he seem excited talking to me and telling me things about his whereabouts and his deployment. Our normal cute convo continues until I told him that the Leo guy after 3dates made it official with me and asked to be my boyfriend. He was pissed and told me I couldnt wait and went out with someone else. Ever since my feelings/love is with the Aqua guy and he knows that. I think I have profess my feelings for him more than 10x but never get upset about it or detach or disappear on me. I've read that never ever tell the Aquarius man your feelings. Why? I'm a Leo, I will show my feelings if I want to. Despite of my revelation to him about the Leo guy becoming my bf, he got mad at first and asked me to stop and focus on my bf. And yet before the end of the day 4 hours after our arguements and I stopped texting him. He sent me a picture of him and saying goodnight. I'm confuse with you Aqua! You told me to stop and focus on my new bf, so I stopped and yet you sent me a pic of you!? He was asking for a picture of me, and I told him "I thought you want me to stop bothering you, how come now you're like this? You can't stay away from me, because you have a big crush on me, you just can't admit it" lol I always call him out. I always sense he giggle and smile when I'm being cute, silly and flirty with him. And I speak my mind, I wasn't afraid to tell him what's on my mind. I told him on our arguement earlier that all I want him to do is to make us official, date me or have a relationship with me and

and I will ditch the Leo guy in a heart beat. I asked him, will you be my bf? And all he said is "not now". Ok then I'll focus on the Leo guy instead of you don't wanna be my bf anyway. Make up your mind Aqua, you know I have deep feelings for you, I know you do to, just afraid to admit it. Coz if you don't have any feelings for me, you wouldn't waste your time on me, talk to me everyday and now that you know I dated and starting a relationship with another guy. Why you seem like you can't let go of me either? I hurt your ego by dating while you're away, but why not, we never really dated. And I gave you a heads up about me going to date. Make up your mind my charming Aqua man..let go of me or keep me. I'm not gonna tie you down, all I want is validation that we are something. Let go of that cold feelings, because I can sense there is something inside your heart, you're just afraid to say and show it. Please need Aquarius experts some advice and criticism. Just be gentle with this Leo gal, I'm just in love with a charming Aqua that confuses me until now. 🙂

I wish I knew what to say. Maybe the deployment held him back. I think it would a capricorn, but not so sure about how an aquarius would react.

In the past, years ago, there was an aquarius man that liked me, I think he did anyway. He would text me, hang out with me, tease me, could see it in his eyes, but he wouldn't ask me out. So being the cardinal sign I am, I approached him about dating. He just said he didn't want a relationship. So I dated other people. It wasn't a threat, just how I am. My attitude is either step up or get out of the way. He kept texting me. Okay, friends it is. Once I found one I liked enough to keep dating, he lost out. We are still friends, that's all it ever was, all it will ever be. He told me much later that he was stupid and let fear of a relationship hold him back and he regretted it. His loss. For what it's worth, I'm whole heartedly in love with the guy I started dating after that. He is way more perfect for me than that other aqua guy. Any way you look at it, I won.

So, the moral of this story is give the Leo a chance. It might be a win for you, too!

Hi truecap, you know my story and thank you for what you wrote. I had let go of him for awhile and dated the Leo guy, and he had the courage to make it official with me just after 3 dates. I like the Leo guy but not as much as I feel for my Aqua. Is he just doing this because he's threatened to lose me completely to another guy? I'm willing to continue with the Leo guy as long as Aqua will not be in the picture to play with my heart and mind. He still have the big impact to me that I can get manipulated by his charm. And yet I'm not gonna give in until he gives up and give me the relationship that I want. He wanna play mind games, acting like letting go of me and yet in reality he cannot. Why does Aquarius man have to be this hard to deal with? I can feel the interest but he's not letting go. I swallowed a lot of my Leo pride for him, that's how much I want him. I could let go of my pride and ego because I wanna win his trust. Ok I know I dated while he's away, he got pissed about that, but it's my right, because he's still not dating me and still has that fear of relationship.

Yes, it's your right. You haven't done anything wrong. I really don't have any advice for this situation. I know it's frustrating. Maybe the not letting go is because he's a fixed sign. —

Maybe some of the aquas will pitch in.

Hi there, I'm a Leo and have been in a 20+ year relationship with an Aqua male. We are not married,and doubt we will.ever be. My suggestion to you is to really think about what you want in a relationship, and choose based on which one meets your neds best. It took my Aqua 10 years to "make it official" with me, and only after I told him I'd had enough and was done with him. And at that point, I really was. He came back after 3months, confessed his deeepest feelings for me, and completely changed his behavior. I took him back (obviously). A relationship between you will likely involve you making most of the compromises, and spending a lot of time alone. Think long and hard about this relationship and if that's what you really want. Sometimes I wonder if I made the right choice, but I do love him deeply.

That's my 2 cents. Good Luck! :-)

Omg @sultrykitty 10 years to make it official? I wanna hear more of that story..does he act just like the way my Aqua act?

So we met when we were young (19), so a lot of what happened was just due to being young. He treated me like I was a booty call, while swearing that I wasn't. He always told me that being in a relationship with him wouldn't be fair to me, and looking back, he was right. He ended up having a daughter with another girl and wouldn't introduce me to her because he said I'd be mean to her. I pushedhim too hard for iintimacy (too hard for an Aquarius, anyway). I would get jealous and angry at him, and he would pretty much say fine, then, leave. We drove each other mad...lots of yelling, throwing things, but he never laid a hand on me.

He would spend time with other girls and say they were just friends, then say we were only just friends. Plenty of crazy making for thr first five years. We broke up constantly, but couldn't stay away from each other for long, the sex was and still is off the charts intense.

As I said, he grew up, I learned to accept his way of expressing love and he learned to accept mine. But it hasn't been easy by any stretch. Most of my friends and family thought I should just give it up, but his sweetness really shines thru if you know where to look. We have similar tastes in movies (sci fi), humor, etc. So for the most part we work, but it has taken a lot of.work and frankly, most of it has been on my side. It most definitely has helped me grow and mature in a lot of ways!

As an Aqua male, I don't personally like guys who can't decide either way properly. I can understand you people's anguish.

@truecap my Aqua started ignoring me now for two days. He don't respond to my text anymore even a text message with a simple goodnight. He wasn't like this before. He always respond to all my iMessage. Its hurting me because I'm not sure if I'm losing him now. I really think he got hurt when I dated the Leo guy. I stopped seeing the Leo because I can't get my Aqua out of my mind. I thought I can make the Leo distract me from Aqua. Help, do you think I'm losing him? Will he contact me again? I want an answer from him, but he's not telling me anything. I asked him if he wants me to totally stay away from him, I didn't get an answer. Before when I ask him things like that he would say something. Should I stop bothering him and stopped all the contact? I want to because of my pride, but I can't help it. I just want a simple response from him, so I know he's still around and we are still good.

Really, two days to an aqua is nothing. Yeah, it sucks, but it's really not that long of a time frame for them. My advice is to stop contacting him constantly. The repeated questions asking what he wants is going to be irritating to him and it will be a turnoff. It reaks of desperation.

Think about this. He should be afraid of losing you instead of you being afraid of losing him. Women who are confident don't have fear. They know their worth and if a guy isn't doing anything to maintain, then they walk away without looking back. We can't make someone feel chemistry. We can't make someone love us. It's not their fault if they don't feel it, so a confident woman instinctly gets this and moves on without wasting her time, she has no fear of losing him because she knows she can do better than a man who isn't willing to give 100% .

Fear leads us to do some pretty degrading and desperate things. Fear leads us to plead for someone's attention, which is a deserpate move. Fear leads us to forget our self worth. Fear leads us to beg and grovel, which is degrading.

Why are we afraid of losing someone who treats us in a way that makes us feel this way? It's all a matter of perspective.

So, stop contacting him! Stop asking him questions!! Stop trying to hang onto something that isn't working!

If he wants you, he will reach out. If he doesn't reach out, respect yourself and stop begging.

Remember, the first thing men say they find attractive in a woman is self confidence. That is first and foremost on their list of what they want, what they are attracted to and what they look for in long term relationship potential.

Ask yourself: Are you being confident or are you letting desperation take the lead?
Whose the better catch? You or him? (and you better say you)

*hugs*

Keep in mind, he's deployed in the military. So, he may have some very valid reasons for not being able to respond.

Keep in mind what I said earlier, but keep that in mind too.

Basically, stop worrying. He will contact you when he can and if it isn't restricted he will probably volunteer what has been happening.

Wow, that's a good one. Eye opener for sure! I've been texting him with something light and simple, even a goodnight he won't respond to. It wasn't like that when we were still in good terms. I saw that he reads my messages but he chose not to answer it. I know I screwed up our happy and light situationship because I wasn't contented with what he can offer me. I know I shouldn't act desperate, I'm a Leo, I have pride and confidence. I will try not to contact him, I guess two days of him ignoring me is nothing. I wasn't use to it, because he never ignore my text (and its everyday) for the past almost 5 months that we had something. I just wish he's just trying to heal from the hurt and disappointment I caused him and come back to me like nothing happened. Thanks @truecap!

I hope it didn't sound harsh or rude (I didn't mean you were being all those things, it is a generalized concept). Life and happiness is all about pespective. 🙂
I finally learned that in my old age. I figure I can look at it this way and be miserable, or I can look at it that way and be happy. So, choose the "that" way.

Posted by truecap
Really, two days to an aqua is nothing. Yeah, it sucks, but it's really not that long of a time frame for them. My advice is to stop contacting him constantly. The repeated questions asking what he wants is going to be irritating to him and it will be a turnoff. It reaks of desperation.

Think about this. He should be afraid of losing you instead of you being afraid of losing him. Women who are confident don't have fear. They know their worth and if a guy isn't doing anything to maintain, then they walk away without looking back. We can't make someone feel chemistry. We can't make someone love us. It's not their fault if they don't feel it, so a confident woman instinctly gets this and moves on without wasting her time, she has no fear of losing him because she knows she can do better than a man who isn't willing to give 100% .

Fear leads us to do some pretty degrading and desperate things. Fear leads us to plead for someone's attention, which is a deserpate move. Fear leads us to forget our self worth. Fear leads us to beg and grovel, which is degrading.

Why are we afraid of losing someone who treats us in a way that makes us feel this way? It's all a matter of perspective.

So, stop contacting him! Stop asking him questions!! Stop trying to hang onto something that isn't working!

If he wants you, he will reach out. If he doesn't reach out, respect yourself and stop begging.

Remember, the first thing men say they find attractive in a woman is self confidence. That is first and foremost on their list of what they want, what they are attracted to and what they look for in long term relationship potential.

Ask yourself: Are you being confident or are you letting desperation take the lead?
Whose the better catch? You or him? (and you better say you)

*hugs*

Awesome! 🙂