Ok i admit that i do want him!

Ok i admit that i do want him!

Ok i posted a while ago about my FWB situation with an Aqua guy, who i thought I had no interest in wanting a relationship with. But i am now ready to admit I do like him lol.

We have bene hanging out a lot recently (without sex) and the attraction is just rediculous! everyone around us always says that were are stupidly well suited for eachother, i just laugh it off and he just smiles.

Just wondering what the best move would be in this type of situation. I told him to back off with the attention when we were FWB as I felt he was too involved for it to be just sex. But now I actually know im better I wish I hadnt been so hasty.

He made a few comments to a friend saying that "im the type of girl he could live with" but never specified on what level he meant this. He is also well known to just say things for the sake of it (very big attention seeker!) so I never really pay that much attention to what he says. But when I was also telling a friend that ive accepted the fact that I will always live alone as im fundamentaly unliveable with he once again said that he could live with me.

I know i should really talk to him about it, but I dont want to scare him off as he could just be being friendly and im reading too much into it, who kows?! just wondered what your guys opinions were on this.

We are no longer sleeping together, even though he did ask me round for sex the other day but when i came round we just ended up chilling together and having a laugh, and i kind of got the feeling that saying he wanted sex was just a reason to get me round.

I've never got the whole friends with benefits thing. Usually one or the other wants more than that and usually the feeling isn't mutual. This can lead to a lot of confusion, hurt and bitterness from one of the two involved in the situation. Certain questions that people ask in this situation just don't make sense. They would make sense in an actual relationship, though. He asked you to come round for sex - you went round - you didn't have sex. He was probably annoyed about this; not that he would've told you that. Because he probably feels that there will be other chances so for him it would be best to keep you happy.

I think that you need to find some closure on this. Tell him what you want - and if he doesn't feel the same then you should probably walk away. Unless, you want to continue in the whole friends with benefits thing, which, judging by your post, doesn't seem to be the case at all.

It was his choice not to have sex not mine, I was the one left annoyed and confused at first, but we had a fun night so wasnt bothered in the end. I have no problem being FWB with the guy but if we could make a relationship work I would go for it. Im not your average stupid girl who pines after a men who dont want me. If he dont want me thats fine.

I am enjoying being single but I also dont want to pass up on a opportunity to be with someone if I think we could have something special. But also dont want to ruin a freindship by jumping to conclusions that arnt true.

Posted by libra sun
It was his choice not to have sex not mine, I was the one left annoyed and confused at first, but we had a fun night so wasnt bothered in the end. I have no problem being FWB with the guy but if we could make a relationship work I would go for it. Im not your average stupid girl who pines after a men who dont want me. If he dont want me thats fine.

I am enjoying being single but I also dont want to pass up on a opportunity to be with someone if I think we could have something special. But also dont want to ruin a freindship by jumping to conclusions that arnt true.

So why did ask you to come round for sex? Why not just ask you to come hang out? Which is what happened. Seems like an odd question to ask in my opinion.

Well thats what I'm saying - find out if he wants you in that way. Because the title of this post does include the words "I do want him." If you want a serious relationship then you must speak to him about it - maybe he wants one too but is fearful just like you are. But if you don't say these things then it just won't happen. I don't see it ruining the friendship either - haven't you guys already had sex? Just go for it. 🙂

Posted by Tahlia

Posted by Aquaguy7
I've never got the whole friends with benefits thing. Usually one or the other wants more than that and usually the feeling isn't mutual. This can lead to a lot of confusion, hurt and bitterness from one of the two involved in the situation. Certain questions that people ask in this situation just don't make sense. They would make sense in an actual relationship, though. He asked you to come round for sex - you went round - you didn't have sex. He was probably annoyed about this; not that he would've told you that. Because he probably feels that there will be other chances so for him it would be best to keep you happy.

I think that you need to find some closure on this. Tell him what you want - and if he doesn't feel the same then you should probably walk away. Unless, you want to continue in the whole friends with benefits thing, which, judging by your post, doesn't seem to be the case at all.

tell us how you really feel hahaha

click to expand

I feel fine!! Thanks! 🙂

Thanks for replies guys. Well Were meeting up next week just to hang out, no talk of sex. So im going to see what vibe I get from him. We have always been quite flirty together but I flirt with everyone and he loves the attention so that doesnt really count for much. He wants to hang out with me without sex which seems like a good sign but who knows with you Aqua's 😛

Ok so i wimped out of telling him how i feel lol but weve been hanging out more.

We are going to a Poker night together at my cousins (she goes out with his best friend) it is a couples night but we both like poker and he said he would "be my boyfriend" for the night. Dont want to read to much into it as he specified it was only for the night but oh well wishfull thinking! 🙂

You must be more communicative. Speak up for yourself.

You should always be upfront and clear to the people you're with. No matter the risk of someone running off or leaving, being honest and communicating your true desires, issues and wants will make things much easier in the long run. Honesty, and by extension directness, is the best policy.

I don't get it. Your friends, you enjoy spending time together, you have sex sometimes, you laugh. How is that not a relationship already? I mean I'm not saying it is, I'm only asking what makes it not one. The fact that you're allowed to see other people? The fact that you're not sure if he wants to commit? Is he seeing anyone else? That would be my question.

Posted by Shadows
I don't get it. Your friends, you enjoy spending time together, you have sex sometimes, you laugh. How is that not a relationship already? I mean I'm not saying it is, I'm only asking what makes it not one. The fact that you're allowed to see other people? The fact that you're not sure if he wants to commit? Is he seeing anyone else? That would be my question.

Sounds so simple when you put it like that! He's not seeing anyone that i know of but he has came out of a 5 year relationship and i have came out of a three year one.

Everyone is right though the only way to know is to ask, im just being a wimp lol.