JezeJas
@JezeJas
12 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 18 · Topics: 2
Do Aries apologize for their mistakes?
^^^^ what she said. I think your Aries will get that. Succinct and non emotional.
I don't have a problem apologizing when I know I hurt someone. This sounds dumb, but does he KNOW he hurt you? Maybe he doesn't.
The reason I didn't bring it right back up is because I didn't want to seem accusatory, I just thought that would make him angry again.
And yeah, BlueAries, the way he went from being mean one morning to just suddenly acting normal again...I'm not really sure if he noticed he hurt my feelings in the process. I think right now he's just too proud of himself for getting the job and thinks I should be so happy about it that I should forget about all the things he said to me in the meantime. Or maybe he just has forgotten already if Aries anger is really that fleeting?
I think I will definitely try to come straight out and talk to him about it later tonight, because it's obvious he can't tell I'm bothered and the sooner I speak to him the better. I know if I wait too long he'll just think I'm dwelling and that will make him just as angry as if he thinks I'm accusing him of something.
My problem is I've tried to calmly address an issue in a conversation with him before, and things always seem to escalate quickly where he either gets defensive, goes on the offensive, or he acts like he never did anything wrong...
And yeah, BlueAries, the way he went from being mean one morning to just suddenly acting normal again...I'm not really sure if he noticed he hurt my feelings in the process. I think right now he's just too proud of himself for getting the job and thinks I should be so happy about it that I should forget about all the things he said to me in the meantime. Or maybe he just has forgotten already if Aries anger is really that fleeting?
I think I will definitely try to come straight out and talk to him about it later tonight, because it's obvious he can't tell I'm bothered and the sooner I speak to him the better. I know if I wait too long he'll just think I'm dwelling and that will make him just as angry as if he thinks I'm accusing him of something.
My problem is I've tried to calmly address an issue in a conversation with him before, and things always seem to escalate quickly where he either gets defensive, goes on the offensive, or he acts like he never did anything wrong...
Sounds like he was stressed out and feeling insecure because he lost his job and was on edge. That doesn't give him a reason to be mean to you but it is an explanation. Personally, I wouldn't take it too much to heart. He is acting sweet because he is no longer worried. It seems like a man thing, no job = worthless to them. I'm sure he hasn't even realized how grumpy he has been towards you. When/if he gets the job, I'd talk to him about how he was treating you.
I guarantee you that he will apologize.
Well, I did try to talk him about it, but he said he really didn't care if he hurt my feelings.
He did say he's been stressed out about work, which I already knew.
At this point I'm not even upset about it anymore, I'm just too tired to be, work has been too exhausting this week; and being emotionally exhausted at the same time over this is too much...so I'm just letting it go. Next time it happens and he tries to take out his anger on me over something unrelated to me, I??ll just have to try to tell him that I'm not the one he should be angry at and walk away. Otherwise I really don't know how to handle his angry temper tantrums that are directed at me. But thanks for all your advice!!
He did say he's been stressed out about work, which I already knew.
At this point I'm not even upset about it anymore, I'm just too tired to be, work has been too exhausting this week; and being emotionally exhausted at the same time over this is too much...so I'm just letting it go. Next time it happens and he tries to take out his anger on me over something unrelated to me, I??ll just have to try to tell him that I'm not the one he should be angry at and walk away. Otherwise I really don't know how to handle his angry temper tantrums that are directed at me. But thanks for all your advice!!
He flat out said he didn't care? He sounds like a dickhead. Why are you still with him?
Posted by JezeJas
Well, I did try to talk him about it, but he said he really didn't care if he hurt my feelings.
He did say he's been stressed out about work, which I already knew.
At this point I'm not even upset about it anymore, I'm just too tired to be, work has been too exhausting this week; and being emotionally exhausted at the same time over this is too much...so I'm just letting it go. Next time it happens and he tries to take out his anger on me over something unrelated to me, I??ll just have to try to tell him that I'm not the one he should be angry at and walk away. Otherwise I really don't know how to handle his angry temper tantrums that are directed at me. But thanks for all your advice!!
da fuq?
how bold of him. I couldnt deal tho...words hurt and once the line is crossed my feelings die.
Posted by AriesIntrovert16
He flat out said he didn't care? He sounds like a dickhead. Why are you still with him?
+1
yes they do it and very often ... the only thing they never want to say is "i lost" lol
Posted by BlueAries23
I don't have a problem apologizing when I know I hurt someone. This sounds dumb, but does he KNOW he hurt you? Maybe he doesn't.
Bullish&@! How in the fuc $ can you call someone names and treat them like shi& and not know you did it? How about this....how about you call him some of those same names and treat him foul and see if his azz don't remember his behaviors. Fuc $ 'em~feed'em fish! You don't let someone treat you like that and then tip toe around their feelings because you don't want to upset them. That's a bunch of bullshiggity! He's just a typical Aries male that thinks he can say whatever the fuc& he wants to say out of his mouth without repercussion. Girl, you better handle your business or keep it moving because if you keep allowing him to treat you like that, he will continue to do just that.
Posted by JezeJas
Well, I did try to talk him about it, but he said he really didn't care if he hurt my feelings.
He did say he's been stressed out about work, which I already knew.
At this point I'm not even upset about it anymore, I'm just too tired to be, work has been too exhausting this week; and being emotionally exhausted at the same time over this is too much...so I'm just letting it go. Next time it happens and he tries to take out his anger on me over something unrelated to me, I??ll just have to try to tell him that I'm not the one he should be angry at and walk away. Otherwise I really don't know how to handle his angry temper tantrums that are directed at me. But thanks for all your advice!!
Don't even say anything. Just walk away. If you do say anything. Wait until he calms down and then say something. And don't just flat you say you asshole you hurt my feelings! Go fuck yourself!!! Lol. Say " I know you been having a hard time. I understand that you may be frustrated, but when you talk to me like .....(fill in the blank). It makes me upset. When he feels like you're pointing the blame or you're attacking him it's just going to get worse. Like I said originally, don't say anything. Every time he acts like that. Walk away. Don't entertain it. He'll get it. It'll let him know that his behavior won't be tolerated. Then when he asks why you're ignoring him. Tell him.
Posted by LIb4LifePosted by BlueAries23
I don't have a problem apologizing when I know I hurt someone. This sounds dumb, but does he KNOW he hurt you? Maybe he doesn't.
Bullish&@! How in the fuc $ can you call someone names and treat them like shi& and not know you did it? How about this....how about you call him some of those same names and treat him foul and see if his azz don't remember his behaviors. Fuc $ 'em~feed'em fish! You don't let someone treat you like that and then tip toe around their feelings because you don't want to upset them. That's a bunch of bullshiggity! He's just a typical Aries male that thinks he can say whatever the fuc& he wants to say out of his mouth without repercussion. Girl, you better handle your business or keep it moving because if you keep allowing him to treat you like that, he will continue to do just that.click to expand
Lol! You don't take no shit, do you.
I can tell you from experience. If you allow this man to do and treat you this way, forgive and forget, it will keep happening. Only getting worse. I just ended a relationship with my aries over his mouth. Three times and he is put. It will not get any better as long as you keep brushing it under the rug...
Forgive and forget, relive and regret....
Forgive and forget, relive and regret....
I can tell you from experience. If you allow this man to do and treat you this way, forgive and forget, it will keep happening. Only getting worse. I just ended a relationship with my aries over his mouth. Three times and he is put. It will not get any better as long as you keep brushing it under the rug...
Forgive and forget, relive and regret....
Forgive and forget, relive and regret....
Old ass thread.
I apologize.
I apologize.
wow this sounds like my dad! and no he wont ever apologize. Me being a bull, I always have to say something when hes angry at me for no reason! like telling him whatever happened from me? or dont call me names (jokingly).. or actually I find myself telling him alot that he misunderstood me and keep reassuring him that i would never mean what he thought from my words (he usually twists situations making me an enemy).. to be honest only the 2nd n 3rd moves work. The first one makes him angrier lol
but well i wish u goodluck.. they have the kindest hearts and im sure his positive traits outweigh his mood swings
but well i wish u goodluck.. they have the kindest hearts and im sure his positive traits outweigh his mood swings
The whole problem here is with him being unemployed. This completely shatters a man's confidence in himself..way more than a woman's.
As for Aries apologizing, let's put it like this : it won't really happen verbally but they will find a way. Problem is, if they're struggling with anything in their life, their partners, family, friends fall into the background until they pick their pieces. They get really snappy and any kind of caring, nurturing, whatever makes them feel more like a failure.
Do not bring up his behavior. Focus on everything that's going well in your life, ignore the tantrums and he will snap back to normal at some point. Lead by example and he will lap it up. Positive people get them out of their moods. Don't battle a tantrum with another. Keep calm.
I'd advice you to address it but you need to catch him in a chill out mood or he will become mad defensive. They flare up quickly.
Throwing good food at them helps. Same for massages. Having a life and stepping away to let them deal with their shit helps also helps.
You might not get a verbal "sorry!" when all is said and done but his behavior will show he'll make ammends to you.
As for Aries apologizing, let's put it like this : it won't really happen verbally but they will find a way. Problem is, if they're struggling with anything in their life, their partners, family, friends fall into the background until they pick their pieces. They get really snappy and any kind of caring, nurturing, whatever makes them feel more like a failure.
Do not bring up his behavior. Focus on everything that's going well in your life, ignore the tantrums and he will snap back to normal at some point. Lead by example and he will lap it up. Positive people get them out of their moods. Don't battle a tantrum with another. Keep calm.
I'd advice you to address it but you need to catch him in a chill out mood or he will become mad defensive. They flare up quickly.
Throwing good food at them helps. Same for massages. Having a life and stepping away to let them deal with their shit helps also helps.
You might not get a verbal "sorry!" when all is said and done but his behavior will show he'll make ammends to you.
Talk to him about it, but use facts and things he said to you as close to verbatim as possible. Aries appreciate facts, honesty and the truth, but the second you start making shit up, we shut down, we dont wanna hear anything else after that. Be sweet about it, don't attack him with it. Cuddle up next to him and say "Hey, can I talk to you about something? While you were unemployed, things between us got difficult." Don't immediately say "You were a dick and unbearable" Let him know using kindness and compassion, that while you understand he was unemployed and it hurt his pride, he took it out on you and how it made you feel.
Remember - Facts, compassion and honesty get you a long way with Ariens!
Remember - Facts, compassion and honesty get you a long way with Ariens!
I had a aries friend and facts never got me anywhere with him. I'm a scorpio woman. When I stated facts he either got quiet and ran away or caught a tantrum and got over it. Sometimes it was like he lived in a bubble.
Posted by AriesIntrovert16
He flat out said he didn't care? He sounds like a dickhead. Why are you still with him?
Hello...My exact same question. His butt would have been at the curb after his outburst of calling me names. Heck with that. There is no valid reason for someone to verbally abuse you. Kick him to the curb and tell him until he acts like he has some sense and apologize to go kick rocks.
Stop being a door mat. You have to demand respect and set boundaries. What if he loses this job and he gets irate yet again and your his target..you allowed the first time he will do it again.
The Aries I dated raised his voice and called me negative names...guess where he is..yup GONE.
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He's been unemployed for the past year and it started getting really tough on him these last couple weeks when it seemed like a potential job opportunity would fall through. He ended up getting the job and now he's acting all sweet again, like he wasn't just threatening to leave me a week ago, saying he wished he never met me, calling me names, and saying a whole slew of hurtful things to me just because he was worried he might not get the job.
My questions are: will he ever apologize for how he's been acting? Is he capable of it? Because to me I feel like acting like nothing happened is totally fake. Am I wrong? I want to talk to him about not turning his hot temper on me, but I'm afraid of setting it off. Are there any suggestions as to how to talk to him without making him angrier? (sorry for asking so many questions)